


Shadow Play

by Augustineblues



Category: Arctic Monkeys, Last Shadow Puppets
Genre: AU, Arctic Monkeys - Freeform, BDSM, Dominance, Drug Use, Exhibitionism, Heavy BDSM, M/M, Multi, Submission, TLSP - Freeform, The Last Shadow Puppets - Freeform, milex - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-18 19:54:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 137,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9400664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Augustineblues/pseuds/Augustineblues
Summary: Alex Turer is a shy aspiring writer new to the city and just trying to get his feet on the ground.Miles Kane is a well-established photographer, fashion icon, and playboy looking for his next museWhat happens when they meet in a darkened night club? Will it be love at first sight or are they headed for disaster?





	1. Strangers When We Meet

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, everybody! Welcome to Shadow Play! this is something that I've been wanting to do for quite a while but hadn't gotten around to until now. I'm really excited about where this will go and I'm hoping you'll all be just as excited after this first Chapter. Especially in the beginning, your feedback is very important.
> 
> Don't worry THIS DOES NOT MEAN I'M TAKING A BREAK FROM AVIATION IN ANY WAY. That will still, of course, be my priority.
> 
> Anyways before we get started A WORD OF CAUTION: Some of the main themes of this story will deal with safe, sane and consensual BDSM.
> 
> Anyways now that that's out of the way let the games begin!I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing in. Let me know what you think! Love you all

Heads throughout the darkened club turn as the man of the hour makes a late appearance. He waltzes through the low lying fog effects that cloud the dance floor as if he owns the place. By the way people pause to acknowledge his entrance he might as well. He's dressed to the nines in black leather pants, tailored to fit the exact curves of his thighs. He pulled off the navy tail coat, patterned with black velvet flowers in one fluid motion. Underneath it had been concealing a blue-grey waste coat, with all but the top button clasped and no shirt below. Atop his head sat a full sized top hat with a baby blue sash tied around the brim like a properly dapper gentlemen. On his feet were blue crocodile boots. From head to toe, he was the epitome of high fashion with his eyes rimmed in charcoal liner which was smudged into his lower lash line. It was no wonder he was a show stopper.

He'd become used to the attention from both men and women. He took pride in the fact that at least a few people would stop whatever they were doing when he entered a room. He'd become rather accustomed to it. "Matthew!" He called waving to a friend sitting in a VIP booth nearby. The man Matthew sat in the center of the crescent shaped booth, a scantily clad young lady on either side of him. Various bottles of Alcohol ( and some possibly questionable substances of unknown origin) littered the table top. "Great party you've got going. Most packed I've seen this place all season." He commented as one of the girls stood, taking his hat and coat and allowing him to slide into her now vacant seat.

"Kane, late as usual!" Matt greeted clapping a hand on the other man's shoulder. " I was starting to think you wouldn't be showing up tonight." He joked.

" Like I would ever miss a famous Matt Helders party! Best damn invitation in the city! You should know by now though, I'd never be caught dead out before eleven."

"Bad for the reputation eh Miles?" Matt joked. " What have you been up today?"

"Been at the studio a better part of the day," Miles said, his eyes scanning the room as he spoke. "Did a shoot with a couple of girls Alexa sent over with some of her new pieces. She sent me the coat too as a thank you. Pretty spectacular isn't it?"

"It's very much something you would wear." Matt laughed.

"Because unlike you, I like elegant fashion." Miles joked. "So after the girls left I had a new model come in for that video series I'm doing. You know, the one for the little film festival at Shadow Play. I'm fully intending to win again this year. Honestly who else is going to win? I'm going to need to find more options though. The boy I had in today was horribly bland. Guess that's why I get for meeting subjects at a dive bar." Miles rolled his eyes as he over-enunciated Dive bar much more than necessary.

"Oh, so you found him while you were slumming it with the common folk." Matt teased as much as he loves to give Miles a hard time he knows that he himself would never venture to half the places Miles is willing to go into.

"He was hip! He was cute! He had a good look that I thought would fit the project. It's not my fault that he turned out to be so bloody boring." Miles sighed.

"Maybe if you actually talked to these boys once in a while before you invite them to your studio then that would stop happening." Matt shrugged. " Did you still fuck him?"

" Of COURSE I did. Who do you think I am! I said he were uninteresting, not unattractive. I need five boys total for the project so far I've only found two that have been worth a damn and the deadline is closing in." Miles insisted.

"Means you better hurry up and find some more." Matt chuckled.

"Means I best find one tonight." Miles countered. He picked up a yellow tablet that was on the table and popped it into his mouth chased with a shot of Vodka. "I'll be getting on the prowl then, catch you in a bit." He said patting Matt's shoulder as he got up.

Miles moved slowly through the dense crowd weaving his way in and out through the labyrinth of sweating bodies hoping someone might catch his eyes. He'd ended up at the bar, only trying to get a drink when someone had started talking him up obviously recognizing who he was. The boy's name was Tim or Jim or something to that effect. Miles hadn't really cared enough to play attention to this dim-witted boy who wouldn't take the hint that he was being ignored. Miles finally found his chance to escape when he noticed an older gentleman dancing much too close to a young woman who seemed anything but calm about the situation.

"If You'll excuse me um, Tim was it?"

"Billie." The boy replied.

"Right," Miles replied making his lack of interest as evident as possible. " Duty calls." He said walking over in the direction of the woman. Just because he's gay doesn't mean he wants to see someone being harassed, especially not at an even being run by one of his closest friends. Matt wouldn't tolerate such volatile behavior from their patrons.

"Excuse me, I don't think the lady is interested. So why don't you back off before I go and alert security." Miles said walking over and pushing the man back. The other man immediately retreated. Miles reputation was well known throughout the local nightlife scene. He wasn't the sort of standing back and letting an assault happen even if it meant taking things into his own hands. Many of the women that frequented these sorts of events were either friends or models that he'd worked with in the past and they deserved better. "I'm sorry he was bothering you. Are you alright dear?" Miles asked looking at the girl in front of him.

She seemed a bit underdressed by comparison, but everyone usually did when standing next to Miles as he made a statement with his rather bold fashion choices. The young woman was wearing skin tight black shorts with a pink top that slid down off her shoulder on one side. She had several glow stick bracelets on that she had no doubt gotten from someone at the party. The whole outfit was topped off with a modest pair of black heels that looked like they might have seen better days.

" 'm fine thank." She said looking so that the long chestnut hair that covered her face fell out of the way. Miles eyes widened as for the first time he noticed that she was actually a he. The boy as it turns out had a smattering of glitter on his face along with badly drawn on liner and lipstick probably a shade too red for him. It was obvious to Miles that this boy had absolutely no clue what he was doing. The only thing that seemed to be working about this outfit was his hair and the fact that regardless of the tragic make up the strangers face was absolutely breathe taking. "Not a girl though, sorry to disappoint you."

"Oh I'm sorry. I saw you from behind and I assumed you were a woman. I should have been less presumptuous." Miles said smiling at the boy in front of him.

"I-I get that a lot." The boy said rubbing his arms nervously and looking around for any sign that the man who had been bothering him might still be around. He guessed now seeing he was in fact male and the kind stranger who had no doubt been hoping to use the knight in shining armor card would probably be on his way.

"You look nervous. Would you like to step out for some air?" Miles asked the boy.

"I-I can't. They said it's no reentry and it was already expensive enough to get in. I don't want it to be a waste..." The shy boy looked down at his shoes.

"Nonsense, don't worry about that. The promoter is my mate and all the doormen know me." Miles said.

"...You're not trying to get me alone or anything are you?" The boy asked still feeling a little shaken.

"No, no of course not. Just thought you could use some air and I was about to step out for a smoke anyways." Miles said smiling at the boy.

"Alright..." He said, barely audible over the loud thumping of the bass from the nearby speakers. Miles put a gentle hand on the small of the boy's back leading him towards the exit.

"Leaving for the night Mr. Kane?" The doorman asked when he opened it to let the two out.

"No just stepping out for a moment and this is my friend um, sorry, I didn't catch your name." He said turning to the boy next to him with a kind smile.

"A-Alex. It's Alex." He stuttered.

"Alex will be accompanying me and I'd like you to let him in and out as he pleases through the rest of the night. He'll be joining Matt and I at our table." Miles said.

"Understood sir." the bouncer nodded as the two walked passed him and out into the cool evening air. It was the end of summer and the nights had just started to drop in temperature in the city. Not to the point of being cool enough to cover up just yet, but it was an enjoyable change compared to the muggy summer months that had just come to an end.

"Thanks, that was really nice of you," Alex said looking down at his feet again and leaning against the brick exterior of the club.

"It's really no problem Alex... Alex even your name is a bit androgynous. I quite like it." Miles said as he pulled his pack of yellow American Spirits from his pocket.

"You didn't say what your name was... Could I please have one of those if you don't mind?" Alex asked. Miles is quickly coming to realize that this boy has a very shy disposition which had probably led to the situation he'd found him in inside. It also rather intrigued Miles.

"Miles, Miles Kane. Pleasure to meet you." Miles said holding out the pack to Alex and allowing him to take a cigarette. "Most people here know that, so I'm going to go ahead and say that this probably isn't your usual scene. I've never seen you at any of our parties before. You look a bit like a fish out of water."

"Um, yeah this is the uh... it's the first time I've ever been to a place like this before. I'm pretty new to the city still. Only been here a few days." Alex admitted.

"A new transplant and already starting to work your way in with the 'in' crowd." Miles joked.

"I just wanted to dance... someone told me that this was a good spot to come to especially for people who um... look the way I do," Alex said.

"I would say that was a right assumption to make. We're a little more... Friendly towards people who are on the unique side here. Matt Helders the promoter that throws these nights is a big believer in having a safe space to let people express their individuality and creativity." Miles explained.

"Oh... Yeah. I heard about it from some of the students down at NYU." Alex said.

"NYU huh? Are you going to school there?" Miles asked.

"N-no I'm just staying with a friend who lives in the dorms until I get my own place." Alex shrugged fidgeting with the lit cigarette in his hand

"Alex, relax. You're stuttering. " Miles said. Something about the authority in his voice calms Alex almost instantly.

"Sorry, I get nervous around new people... I'm quite shy," he said looking away.

"I gathered that." Miles laughed. " Shy little beauty walks into one of my favorite bars, oh what a lucky night I'm having." He looks over at Alex with a smile. That baby pink top the boy is wearing is starting to grow on Miles. Though he would never wear such a thing himself. He likes the way he can see the boys slim shoulders and protruding collar bones that cast shadows on his skin in the soft glow of the street lights.

"What?" Alex asked a little taken aback by the comment.

"My apologies that probably came across way creepier than how I actually meant it. You see I'm a professional photographer. I actually Own a studio not too far from here. I was actually looking to scout out some possible new models for a project that I'm currently working on. You actually fit exactly the sort of thing I'm looking for."

"Me? Model? I don't know..." Alex said his cheeks turning red.

"Well, you're absolutely stunning so I don't see why not! Although, here look up at me for a second." Miles said. He was starting to notice just how much time Alex spent letting his hair cover his face as if to hide from making eye contact with the people around him. Alex obliged the request looking up at Miles who moved a little closer. " It alright if I touch you Alex? I just want to fix something quick."

"Yeah, that's fine," Alex said, he's a bit shocked that Miles actually asked, but it put him at ease rather quickly and he likes the way that Miles says his name. Miles reached closer tucking Alex's hair behind his ears. He wiped away some out of place eyeliner then turned his attention to Alex's lips. He dragged his thumb across the soft skin removing some of the color. He couldn't help but notice how Alex's lips parted slightly as if by instinct. Miles paused with his thumb resting in the center of Alex's bottom lip gazing at him for a moment before pulling away.

"That color was much too bright for you, it doesn't go with your skin it's too much." Miles told him as Alex looked away.

"Right, thanks..." He blushed. " I uh, you know I think I have to go. I don't want to get back to the dorms to late and all." He mumbled.

"Oh, ok. Here." Miles said reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a sleek looking business card. " This is my information and it has the address of the studio on it. Why don't you come by around noon tomorrow if you'd like to give it a try? We'll do some test shots and I can tell you a bit about the project that I'm working on." Miles said holding out the card to Alex who took it from his hand.

"Alright, it was nice meeting you, Miles. Thanks for your help earlier." Alex said smiling at him before heading off in the other direction.

"AL! YOU HAVE TO GO!"

"I don't have to do anything I don't want to Nick!" Alex insisted sitting in his makeshift bed on the dorm room floor.

" But he's MILES FUCKING KANE." Nick seemed to somehow know what that meant whereas Alex was still looking at him like his best friend had suddenly gone off the deep end.

"and?"

"and? He's one of the hottest photographers out there right now. One of the most successful in the field under Thirty. He shoots for Vouge, GQ, Nylon, rolling stone, you name it he's done it. He is like the man in fashion photography. I can't believe you met him and I wasn't there! I have so many questions!" Nick groaned. Being that he was studying fine arts meeting such a renowned photographer would have been a special treat for him. "What is he like, is he nice? Is he as handsome in person as people say he is?"

"Really nice actually. He helped me with this one bloke that wouldn't leave me alone and he's very good looking actually." Alex admitted.

"I really think you should do this Alex. Wasn't the point of coming half way across the world to try new things. You're supposed to be finding yourself remember?"

"I guess... So you think I should do it then?" Alex asked.

"Obviously! It will be good for you to get out of your shell. Who knows this could make you some decent money if he decides to use you more than once. You might be able to get together enough to go to school or-"

"Or work on my book." Alex smiled. "Actually get to doin' something with it."

"See, there's your motivation already and alright, maybe I have ulterior motives for wanting you to do it. Like I want to meet him, or at least hear everything you say about him so I can live vicariously through you and soak in some of his knowledge." Nick laughed

"I'm going to go for a run and think about it I guess." Alex shrugged looking around for his tennis shoes.

"Don't get lost this time! And if you decide you're going to do the shoot then watch everything he does and tell me all about it when you're done." Nick said pointing to the corner where Alex's lost shoes were hiding. Those sneaky sneakers always trying to escape him

Alex decides to take a lap around the surrounding streets of the village that he has become accustomed to. Having only been in the city a week and some days he was just starting to get his bearings. He knows the way to work now, where the coffee shop he likes is, the best deli to grab cheap sandwiches and his way back to the dorms from most places. He'd only braved the subway a few times so far and the one occasion he'd been without nick had ended in disaster. After a train he thought would take him a little ways downtown to a job interview had ended him up in Queens instead he'd decided to stick to the village.

It didn't bother him to stay in just the one part of town. There was so much to see in that area. There was a whole documented history of its past penned by some of his favorite writers like Allen Ginsberg and Jack Kerouac. He'd come to the city to draw from their inspiration whether is be Ginsberg's jazz infused poetic timing or Burroughs notorious accounts of midtown's seedy underbelly. New york city had a heartbeat that inspired so many great talents in years prior and Alex hoped to be one of them that would ride the wave of it's ever-shifting future to success. For now he was content to run the blocks familiar to him while pondering if he should show up to the address he'd been given the night before. He was so wrapped up in his mind, lulled into a trance by the bustling sounds of the city around him that he didn't notice as he was about to collide with another person until it was too late.

"Oh c'mon mate. Watch where you're going you got coffee all over my shirt... the one day I wear white." The man said trying to wipe himself off as Alex sat slightly stunned on the ground.

"Matt you weren't exactly watching either." A familiar voice next to the man laughed cutting through Alex's haze. He seems to look up at the same time Miles looks down and notices him. " Oh, Alex! Fancy running into you here."

"Literally," Matt mumbled trying to use a napkin to remove what coffee he could from the soaked front of his white polo neck.

" Oh hush Matthew this is the boy I was telling you about from last night," Miles said, offering Alex a hand up which he gladly took.

"Hi, um... hi," Alex said not sure what else to say. " Sorry ' bout your shirt."

"It's quite alright, Alex. Now where were you headed to in such a hurry? Surely not to my studio as we're supposed to meet in half and hour and you were going the wrong way!" Miles pointed out. Alex had gotten so distracted that he'd not bothered to check the time.

"Oh, I was just out for a run." He said shifting his weight back and forth on the balls of his feet.

"You were planning on standing me up weren't you!" Miles asked faking an offended expression.

"N-no but-"

"It's ok you don't actually have to do it if you don't-"

"I just lost track of time is all. I should have been more careful. I wasn't planning to skip out! Honestly!" Alex said quickly.

"Well, in that case, would you like to walk together? I was heading that way just now anyways and Matt needs to go home to change his shirt." Miles laughed.

"Alright... but I uh, I'd been planning to shower and change before coming over to your studio." Alex blushed. He was sweaty and not exactly the prettiest thing to look at at the moment.

"Nonsense you look good a is. I like a bit more of a stripped down look for test shots anyways." Miles said, slinging an arm around Alex's shoulder and leading him down the road. There was no turning back now. This was something Alex was going to have to commit to at this point.

"Welcome," Miles said, opening the door that leads from the freight elevator into his studio space. All the walls were white and the floors were a light maple hardwood. One wall on the opposite side of the room from the door was lined with large windows that let warm natural light flow through the room. Artificial lights were also scattered throughout the space as well as some, tripods, props and pieces of furniture.

"It's huge." Was all Alex could really manage to say.

"Sometimes there's a lot of people here. Wardrobe, hair, makeup, models running all over. There needs to be room for everything that needs to be done on bigger shoots. It seems a bit excessive when it's just myself and a subject in the space. Make yourself at home, I'll need a moment go get set up." Miles said.

"Oh, ok," Alex said not really knowing what to do. He suddenly felt incredibly awkward here alone with a man he knew hardly anything about. Miles scurried around grabbing several things, Cameras, tripods, a couple of flashes, and a wooden stool which he placed in front of the white wall in a space brightly lit by the adjacent window.

"Come on over here and have a seat if you would. Just find a position that feels natural to you." Miles said Gesturing towards the stool. Alex did as he was told nervously trying to find a way to sit that didn't make him feel totally ridiculous. Once he became conscious of his own movements everything just felt wrong and forces.

"Stop overthinking this Al, calm down. You can do this." He told himself in his head. He felt self-conscious wishing that he'd had the time to change before coming to meet Miles. He was still in his Running clothes. A loose fitting cerulean blue tank top and a pair of black jogging pants which were looser at the top and tapered in as they came down to his ankles hanging about a quarter inch above the top of this sneakers.

"You're stiff, loosen up a bit," Miles instructed him.

"I um... I'm not really sure what to do. Sorry, I'm nervous." Alex admitted.

"That's alright, most people are the first time," Miles said. He set his camera down and came closer to Alex. " Here, stand up for a moment." Alex, of course, complied immediately. " You've just been running. You should be nice and limber but instead, you're stiff as a board. I want you to just shake everything out, shake your whole body and feel your muscles loosening. Kinda like you're dancing." Miles instructed. He had seen Alex dance last night. He knew how fluid and gracefully he could move. "Don't be afraid to look silly, it's just us here I'll even do with with you." Alex blinked at Miles unsure if he was serious or not until he started shaking his arms and shoulders, flailing around like a ragdoll. So naturally he followed suit until they were both laughing at just how odd the other looked. "Did that help?" Miles asked.

"Mhm!" Alex nodded feeling much better now.

"Good hm... Now, why don't you take off your shoes, that will make things feel a little more natural and tuck your shirt in a bit." Miles said. Alex quickly did both before getting back up on the stool. "Yeah, that's it you look so much better Alex. Stay like that for me for a moment." Miles snapped a few photos before putting the camera down again. " good." He looked Alex up and down before walking over to him. "It alright if I move you a bit?" Alex nodded without a word.

Miles walked over to Alex pulling a bit of the front of his tucked in shirt out before circling him. Alex could feel Miles eyes scrutinizing every inch of him, but for some reason, it didn't make him uncomfortable. "Sit up straight." He said pressing a hand to Alex's back. "I said loose, not lazy. You'll do best to learn the difference if I'm going to have you work with me, understood?" Miles asked.

"Y-yes sir," Alex said. He's not sure why he felt the need to address Miles in this way as he didn't seem to be drastically older than Alex by any means. There were a few years between them that was evident but not enough for someone to bat an eye at or so Alex assumed at least Miles did look young after all. It was the way that he carried himself and the authority with which he spoke that made Alex feel as though he needed to listen. His words apparently didn't go unnoticed as Miles raised an eyebrow at Alex's words.

"One last thing." Miles leaning a little closer to Alex's ear as he spoke. He reached his hands into Alex's silky chestnut curls and messed them up a bit, tucking some of the stands that fell in the boys face back behind his ear in a way that made Alex shiver. " Much better," Miles said going back to his camera. " You're absolutely stunning."

They took quite a few more shots. Miles asking Alex to do various things for each of them. By the end, Alex had started to relax and was even having fun with it. " Well Alex, I've got to say I think you were born to do this," Miles said looking back through the film. " Once you get out of your own way you're a natural.

"Thanks." Alex smiled as his cheeks tinted red.

"Why don't you have a seat on the couch I'd like to talk to you a bit about the project I'm working on before you go for the day," Miles said. Alex did as he was told taking a seat on the couch next to Miles waiting in anticipation of what he was going to say. " Now Alex. As you might know I'm most known for my fashion and artistic photography."

"I honestly didn't know about any of it till my friend told me about you this morning," Alex admitted, he was a bit ashamed, to be honest.

"That's quite alright. Now the thing that a lot of people don't know about is I also do a lot of fetish photography. It's a passion of mine." Miles confessed.

"O-ok?" Alex said fidgeting a bit nervously now.

"Now you have every right to say no to this but right now I'm working on a 35mm film series that I'll be submitting to a... sort of film festival hosted without the local fetish community here in New york and I'm looking for models that would like to take part in it," Miles explained.

"What would I need to do? Do I have to be naked?" Alex asked.

"Total nudity is encouraged but not mandatory, although you would need to strip down to only your underwear. What would happen during the shoot is you would be sitting somewhere, probably on this couch. Basically, you get comfortable, take your clothes off, and touch yourself to completion while I film you. While you're doing that I'd be interviewing you asking you questions that could range from what's your favorite color, to things about your hobbies, and even sexual fantasies and desires. You can give me as much or as little information as you like and you're allowed to pass on a question at any time. You can also at any time in the process decide that you don't wish to continue. Does this sound like something that you would like to be a part of?" Miles asked.

Alex had to think it over. He was getting more and more comfortable with Miles all the time. He liked the feeling of being watched while he was posing and had actually found it all slightly arousing. "Yeah, I think I would like to at least give it a shot." He finally replied.

"Good, then would you mind coming by around the same time tomorrow. Wear something comfortable that makes you feel confident and preferably some nice underwear." Miles said. "When was the last time you touched yourself?"

"Um... I dunno." Alex blushed. " Probably not since I got here. I've been in the NYU dorms with my friend and his roommate so it's not easy to get any time alone." He admitted.

"Good, then you'll be nice and anxious," Miles smirked. "Alright, Alex you've done wonderfully today. I want you to get a good night sleep tonight. Can you promise to do that for me?"

"Yes, sir..." There it was again why did he keep saying that.

"Alright, I'll walk you out." Miles said getting up and offering a hand to Alex. " Come, let's go. I'm ready to lock up for the evening." Alex nodded and took Miles hand not letting go of it again until he was in the elevator with him on their way back to the ground floor.

"So let me get this straight. He wants you to jerk off on camera?" Nick asked a little shocked.

"Yeah, He said. It's for this like fetish film festival thing he'd doing a series of them or something." Alex shrugged.

"And you actually agreed to it? Alex, this sounds shady. I don't know about this. How do you know he doesn't just get off on watching young boys like you. Or worse what if he tries to do something to you! You know as well as I do you're not really... prepared for a situation like that." Nick pointed out.

" If he was going to do anything creepy he probably would have done it while we were in his studio alone all day! You were practically begging me to go do the shoot this morning!" Alex pointed out. "Besides Nick I'm a big boy I can take care of myself and what do you mean by young boys like me? I'm eighteen and he doesn't seem that much older than us!"

"Alex he's twenty-eight he's a full ten years older than you. Maybe it was wrong for me to have encouraged you this morning because this is starting to sound suspicious. I don't want you getting hurt. " Nick sighed shaking his head.

"No, I'm alright with it. If you heard the way that he talks to me... Look I don't think he's going to do anything weird ok. He's been very professional with me about everything. You even said this morning I need to get out of my comfort zone. Well, that's what I'm doing."

"Alright, if you're comfortable with it then do whatever you want but you call me tomorrow if there's any trouble and I'll be right over ok?" Nick gave in.

"Ok... now help me pick out something nice to wear!"

The next morning Alex showed up at the now familiar studio bright and early. He punched in the code that Miles had given him to let himself in and took the lift up to the third floor where the studio was located.

"Alright, Jamie. Same time next week?" He heard Miles voice as a man passed Alex heading into the elevator as he was coming out.

"See you then." The man obviously named Jamie replied. Alex only caught a glimpse of him. He was dressed in slightly baggy jeans with a navy windbreaker and an oversized messenger bag over his shoulder.

"Ah, Alex! You're early!" Miles said walking over to greet him.

"Who was that? Another one of your models?" Alex asked curiously.

"What? Jamie? No, bless his heart he couldn't if he tried he's about as graceful as a T-rex. He's a... business associate of sorts. He supplies my with some of the products I need to keep this place running." Miles said looking Alex up and down. " You look lovely today." He commented Alex hadn't worn anything spectacular he was told to be comfortable so he was in black skinny jeans and a black bodysuit that had a bit of transparent mesh across the top of it. His hair was left in messy waves and his makeup was minimal just a bit of highlight and some mascara. He'd left his lips mostly bare with only chapstick on them.

"Thanks." Alex smiled.

"Why don't you go and have a seat on the couch then Alex," Miles said gesturing towards the couch that had been covered with a blue sheet. Alex walked over and sat down unlacing his shoes. He might as well have that out of the way so he doesn't have to worry about it later. Miles walked over and sat in a chair that was positioned across from the couch. And sat down looking across the small coffee table at Alex. "Right then, what I have here is a release form. It will allow me to use this video for non-monetary artistic purposes. It also states that you have my word not to put it on any sort of adult websites. Since it's filming the one on this camera will be the only copy I won't be digitizing it in any way and any editing will be done by the analog methods of actually cutting the film understood?"

"Yes," Alex replied.

"I'm not going to have you sign the release until after you're done. If you choose not to finish the shoot part way through then the film will be destroyed. One we come to the end I'll give you a chance to review the film if you want and decide if you want to allow me to use it. This is your body so you should be in control of what happens to these images. Once you sign that release it means you're trusting me with what will happen to them. Until then you can decide to change you mind at any point the only thing you can't take back is well... I'm going to see you with your clothes off because I'll be taking the video of you darling." Miles said.

"That's fine," Alex said.

"Now, you can show me as much or as little as you like in terms of how you position your body. You can leave your underwear on if you like but I'd prefer they come off at some point." Miles said Alex bit his lip and nodded. " I have about an hour of film on this camera so you can take your time. I'd like you to drag it out for at least a while. Edge yourself a bit. I may from time to time make suggestions which I'd like you to listen to although you're under no obligation to do so. I will also not touch you at any point during this, understood?"

"Yes... Miles." Alex said again he this earned a raised eyebrow from Miles. He'd intentionally paused to remember to call him by his name.

"Great then now that that's out of the way. Why don't you go ahead and strip down and we'll get rolling." Miles suggested. Alex stood up from the couch unbuttoning his jeans and pulling them down to his ankles. " Bodysuit huh? Interesting choice." Miles said. For being so shy this boy was full of surprises.

"I er, I like the way it rubs when I move. I was trying to get myself a little excited on the way over here to calm my nerves." Alex admitted.

"That was very wise of you Alex good thinking." Miles complimented him making Alex smile. Alex liked to be praised for he seldom ever was. "Why don't you leave that on for now." Alex nodded sitting back down on the couch. It's only then that he notices how silky and soft the sheet is against his skin, it's heavenly!

Miles reached over to turn on the camera making sure it was lined up just how he wanted.

"Alright, you want to go ahead and tell me your name please?"

"Alex Turner."

"And how old are you Alex?" Miles asked.

"I turned eighteen last January," Alex replied.

"You have an English accent. We've got that in common, but tell me, where is yours from?"

"I'm from a small town in North England," Alex said not wanting to get to specific about where he came from.

"You came in today wearing a body suit I see and how does a boy from a rural town in England start to wear such daring things," Miles asked.

"I got it when I came here to New York actually. It's new. I picked out a couple of cheap things I thought would fit the style I always wanted." Alex said.

"And what style is that?" Miles asked

"I'd like to be more feminine. I like to feel pretty.... do I look pretty?" Alex asked. finally remembering that he's supposed to be touching himself he starts trailing his hands up and down his thighs and running them across his chest.

"I'll be asking the questions here Alex, but yes, you do look very pretty indeed." Miles smiled at Alex. Pretty enough to ravage which is exactly what he intends to do later. "How long ago did you come to New York?"

"I've been here about twelve days," Alex replied.

"You've very new then aren't you?" Alex simply nodded, sliding his hands over his chest. Miles was right to think that because Alex could dance so well he'd be good at something like this as well.

"And what brings you so far from home. Most people come to new york looking for something, what are you hoping to find?" Miles asked as Alex started grinding a bit against his palm.

"Acceptance, inspiration, all the cliché answers I'm sure you've heard before. I wanted to start over and finally be the person that I want to be... and maybe find someone to love me along the way." Alex answered.

"And how are you supporting yourself while you do this soul searching?" Miles asked.

"I'm washing dishes at a diner in the village, but please don't make me talk about that. I'm just starting to get hard." Alex laughed. There's something infectious about his laughter that makes Miles smiles. The boy seems much more relaxed than yesterday although he's far more exposed. It's probably because of all the time they'd spent together.

"Alright, well if you could be doing anything, what would you be doing?" Miles asked.

"Writing! I want to be a novelist someday or a poet perhaps." Alex said. Miles could see the change in his posture as he spoke about writing. " I'm going to take this off now." He said getting to his feet to remove the body suit.

"That's alright. So you write poetry then?" Miles asked. "Would you share some with me?" Alex looked over his shoulder as his back was currently turned to Miles. He pulled one sleeve of his body suit off his shoulder as he spoke.

"I can either masturbate or recite poetry to you, but I don't think I can do both." He says pulling the body suit down revealing lavender underwear beneath with white accents. Miles thought it complimented his skin perfectly. Alex bent over in an exaggerated way so his bum was in the air on display for Miles and the camera as he stepped out of the body suit. He stood up slowly turning back around and facing Miles. " Which one would you prefer sir?" He asked tossing the body suit towards Miles.

"Well, only one of those things works for this purpose so I guess the poetry will have to wait till another day," Miles said. " You were very shy yesterday and today you seem very playful. What changed?"

"Oh, I'm still absolutely panicking on the inside! I'm just following my impulses. I don't like to do anything half-heartedly. I'm very shy, but I'm also used to being the best at things." Alex shrugged pacing back and forth a bit in front of the couch. He's also enjoying Miles watching him quite a bit.

"What sorts of things." Miles inquired.

"football, Tennis, ping pong, art, all kinds of things. I always got really high marks too." Alex said rubbing his hands over the front of his underwear. As he stood right in front of the camera. "Do I have to stay on the couch or am I allowed to move around? " He asked. Miles hadn't even thought about that up until this point. The other boys he'd worked with had never thought to leave the couch.

"Yeah of course. Do what you want." Miles said, removing the camera from the tripod.

"Thank you, Miles," Alex said moving away from the couch and walking around the open space a bit.

"you said you were good at sports. I didn't take you for the athletic type." Miles pointed out.

"Is it because I'm pretty?" Alex asked. " I might like to look feminine but I'm still very much a boy. I value things like strength and endurance just as much as the soft qualities of my feminine side." Alex explained. " These days I prefer to just run. I don't want as much in the way of defined muscles I used to have when I was playing sports. I prefer the softer lines. I literally ran into your friend yesterday don't you remember? I didn't run this morning that's why I wanted to move around I need to burn off some energy."

"I remember." Miles laughed following after Alex. His steps were graceful, intentionally so as he strutted around. Alex kept looking over his shoulder at the camera till he suddenly got a better idea. Trying to dodge way from it. He moved to get behind Miles' back and every time Miles would turn to get him back in the viewfinder Alex would do it again. "Alexander!" He threatened.

"What? I'm just playing! You said I have an hour I'm taking my time so I don't cum too quick." Alex said grabbing the camera from Miles. " Or do you just want to see this?" Alex asked holding the camera above himself and sticking his other hand in his underwear to rub himself. "oooh yeah fuck, oh god I'm so fucking hard oooh." He faked moaned biting his bottom lip in an attempt to look sexy.

"Alex, give that back!" Miles snapped although he's got to admit that what Alex is doing is pure gold! He's nothing like the other boys Miles has had in. He's glad he'd taken the time with him the day before to get him comfortable enough to let this side of him come out.

"Um, NO!" Alex said walking away from Miles and hopping up on the ledge of one of the windows so the cityscape could be seen behind him as he pointed the camera at himself " Hi my name is Alexander and I'm eighteen years old. Yesterday a photographer asked me if I'd come jerk off on his couch while he videotaped me for art reason and I said yes because I'm hoping someone will see it and fall in love with me." Alex said handing the camera back to Miles who kept it on him.

"And if someone were to fall in love with you after seeing my little film what would you like to tell them?" Miles asked.

"I'm an only child although since finding out I was gay when I was fifteen my parents have started claiming their son died. I currently live on the floor of my friend's dorm room but I've been basically living on his floor or couch since I was fifteen. If you haven't guessed yet I have a LOT of emotional baggage. Also If you approach me I'll probably be too shy to talk to you and run away. I very seldom warm up to people." Alex said.

"So how come you warmed up to me so quickly?" Miles asked.

"Because you helped me, and I have no reason to think you're going to hurt me." Alex shrugged kicking his bare feet against the wall.

"Alright and what else do you want to tell our viewers?" Miles laughed.

"Well, if you let me move in with you I'll scrub your floors, cook you dinner and suck your cock real good," Alex said blowing a kiss to the camera. " I really need a place to stay but I don't have any money. Moving here took everything I had! But it was worth it. Got a plane ticket, bought myself some cheap new clothes when I got here, apparently, I go dancing at night clubs and meet really cool photographers there. It's all very exciting for me."

"Oh, is that so?" Miles asked.

"Yeah, This is my chance to start over and be the person I wanted to be instead of the person that everyone at home made me hate. I used to hate myself because I thought there was something wrong with me. That's why I got so good at sports. All the boys used to say 'Oh Alex just wants to look at our bums in the locker room' They could call me faggot all they wanted but if I was the best on the team then they couldn't get rid of me. So in that way, I kinda got the pride of being the best and knowing I wasn't as useless as they told me I was. It gave me to be proud of myself for. No one else was ever proud of me so..."

"That's sad Alex." Miles sighed.

"I'm not sad though because I never let them break me. Am I anxious and shy but that isn't all there is to me. That's why I wanted to do this. I want to show people I'm more than just my fears. Sure I'm shy but I can be fun and adventurous too I swear. " Alex muttered.

"I can definitely see how that could be true." Miles smirked, he was certainly having a lot of fun with Alex. "And what are you looking for in a potential partner Alex?"

"I'm not picky. I just want someone who is going to be kind and accept me for me. Gay, shy, and a little bit feminine. That and I need someone who is going to be able to be patient with me and teach me where I lack experience. I'll be a bit shallow and say that I would like them to be attractive. I mean I'm young and think I'm at least fairly good looking so that shouldn't be too much to ask for, right? Really though, looks don't make a difference. I just want someone who's going to love me and accept me because that's not something I've ever had before."

"You're a beautiful boy Alex, I'm sure anyone would be lucky to have you." Miles said.

"You really think so?" Alex asked blushing and looking away from the camera.

"I don't just think. I know." Miles said. " Other than the fact that you're good looking what would you say are your best selling points?"

"I'm a virgin. People like that right?" Alex asked.

"Some people do yes. They enjoy the thrill of getting to be someone's first. You don't really seems like a virgin to me." Miles said.

"Well, I am. There were only two gay boys in our town. One was me and the other way my best friend Nick who stayed pretty firmly in the closet. It's not like I had a whole lot of options. Nick and I aren't each other's types. I mean we fooled around occasionally, but there was never really anything between us. Everything we did together was mostly for experimentation." Alex shrugged. " We didn't want to be totally hopeless when we found real partners. It was all just blow jobs and hand stuff though. Anal wasn't something we ever even considered. Nick asked once, but I told him I wanted my first time to be with someone I loved, and he wanted the same. Not to say we don't love each other just... not in that way." Alex said hopping down off the edge of the window."Can I see your camera for a minute?"

" Sure," Miles said against his better judgment handing the camera over to Alex. Alex snatched it and immediately ran to the other side of the room, He stood in the corner with his back to Miles and pulled his underwear away from his body letting the camera look down the front of them while he giggled to himself.

"Your camera's seen my penis but you still haven't." He said, letting the elastic snap back into the place on his hips. "Figured I need to show the viewers the goods if one of them is going to take me home." His smile is genuine and makes Miles smile as well when Alex hands the camera back to him.

"How come you don't want to show me?" Miles asked, watching Alex through the viewfinder as the younger boy turned his attention to a box of props, pulling out a black and gold feather boa which he looped around himself.

"What you don't think I look cute in my underwear?" Alex teased, flicking the end of the boa at Miles.

"Now, I didn't say that..."

"The man who loved me will like me even if I keep them on."Alex insisted. "Besides." he ran his hand down the front if the material, grinding into his palm and pulling them down just enough to give Miles a little taste of skin before they were slid back into place. " My bum looks great in purple."

"Alright, that's true, but you still haven't answered my question. Do you not want to show me? You've let the camera see you. Are you afraid to let me see you exposed like that?" Miles asked.

"N-no, I'm just worried that-"

"That what?" Miles pressed.

"What if you think It's small?" Alex asked looking away. Miles resisted the urge to laugh, not wanting to make Alex insecure.

"Alex, I can see anyways. You're perfectly average, you've got nothing to worry about." Miles said. Alex paused for a moment before slowly sliding his underwear off, still leaving himself covered by the feather boa. He kicked the underwear aside and started to walk back to the couch giving Miles a view of his exposed backside.

"Mmm this boa is so soft it tickles in all the right places and these sheets are like heaven! I've been sleeping on a sleeping bag on a hard floor so you have no idea how wonderful this feels." Alex said, spreading out on the couch still not allowing Miles to get a good look at him. " I have to get out of there and find a place of my own before I lose me mind. I love Nick and all but I don't think his new friends are very fond of me. I think it bothers them that I'm so shy. They mistake my introversion for disliking them." Alex explained.

"Have you made any new friends of your own Alex?" Miles asked.

"No, just the one I came here with. I've got a couple of people I've talked to over at NYU but they're more acquaintances than anything. There is one friend of Nick's that I spend a lot of time with, but usually, it's because I'm their third wheel. I think they like each other. I walked in the other night to Nick wanking and calling the guys name out." Alex shrugged.

"So no other friends then?" Miles asked.

"Not really, you I guess. I would consider you my first friend here ." Alex smiled.

"Me?"

"Yeah, no one else really has paid any attention to me," Alex replied.

"Oh, really? Because it looked like you were getting some attention last night when I met you." Miles joked.

"Creepy unwanted attention!" Alex squealed. " He came up and started grinding on me and you know what that weirdo said to me?"

"What did he say to you, Alex?"

"He told me that he I wanted to take me in the bathroom and 'Ram my sissy little hole until I cried' How can you say that to someone! SOMEONE YOU DON'T KNOW!" Alex laughed.

"That's disgusting," He agreed. Sure he's said his fair share of raunchy things to people but usually, it was after he'd had his tongue down their throat and they were giving him the obvious green light that they were ready to go. Being a part of the kink community Miles has a certain sort of understanding about just how important consent is.

"Like I mean I know I have a great bum but really!" He rolled over on his stomach to show off his butt giving Miles a great view of the soft rounded flesh. "I felt violated just by him saying those things in my ear. Who knows what could have happened if you hadn't come along and helped me out. My hero!"

"You looked uncomfortable. I couldn't just stand by and let it happen." Miles said. "It was no big deal."

"Well, if it matters any, It meant something to me and it made me feel like I could trust you. Otherwise, I wouldn't be here right now. You think I'd expose myself like this for someone I thought might hurt me for doing so? Look I'm all spread out presenting myself for your camera and you could very easily take advantage of that." Alex said.

"I would never do something like that. I always try and make sure that my models feel like-" Miles cut his thought short as he instead watched as Alex started grinding his hips into the couch. He stayed silent to watch the younger boy moan while pushing himself frantically against the cushions for the friction that it provided. He waited a while before asking the next question that had been on the tip of his tongue. "Have you ever fingered yourself, Alex?"

"Of course I have. I realized I could do that right around the same time I figured out that rubbing my dick felt nice, I started pretty young actually. Just because I'm a virgin doesn't mean I don't know my own body. Sure I'm not getting sex, but I'm still a horny teenager."

"Have you ever used any toys on yourself?" Miles asked.

"No, I've never had a chance to get my hands on one. I would like a nice toy, though. Maybe something that vibrates!" Alex said, "I've always been very curious about the vibrating toys." He let out another soft moan as he bucked his hip into the soft sheets.

" Well, I'll tell you what. If my movie wins at the film festival and you're the crowds favorite of the boys then I'll get you any toy you want." Miles offered.

"What do you mean ' favorite of the boys?' there are others?" Alex asked, suddenly he's feeling a twinge of jealousy boiling up in the pit of his stomach.

"Yes, I told you it's a series. I want five in total. You're the third boy to come in." Miles said. Alex was having absolutely none of that!

" But..." he got to his feet, tossing the boa aside and stepping over the coffee table. He sat down on the other side of the table so that he was knee to knee with Miles who had returned to his chair. It was the first good frontal view Miles had gotten of Alex. "I'm YOUR favorite right?" He asked, reaching to stroke his shaft without breaking eye contact with Miles. " Did any of them make you hard like I do?" It's true, Miles was more than a little turned on by watching Alex. There was something about him that Miles found entirely enticing. Perhaps it was something in the way he moved, or his playful nature. Or perhaps it was the fact that Miles knew he couldn't have him. Usually, he would get done with these shoots get off with the model and then send them on their way. Alex thought, Alex he couldn't do that with. Even if he could something inside him kept reminding him that Alex deserved better than a quickie on the studio floor.

"You're certainly the most interesting boy that I've had in here," Miles admitted.

"Look um, I know you said that you won't touch me but.... Will you help me cum? Like, tell me what to do?" Alex asked, finally breaking their eye contact.

"What?" Miles asked unsure if he heard the younger man correctly. " You want me to tell you how to masturbate?"

"Um, yeah. I uh..." And there was that shyness again starting to make an appearance " Look, I've been hard pretty much since I got up this morning. It's starting to hurt. I need to cum soon, but I'm so nervous with the camera on me I don't know if I can." Alex bit his lip.

"And what Makes you think it will be any different if I'm instructing you?" Miles asked.

"When you were telling me what to do yesterday, how to pose and stuff. I don't know something about the authority and how you spoke made me feel really safe. I'm not sure why..." Alex confessed blushing and looking down at his feet while Miles considered his answer.

"Alright, go on back to the couch," Miles said. Alex stood up walking back to the couch and waiting for further instructions. Miles has done this many many times before but he knows he's got to have a slightly different approach with a boy like Alex. " You're allowed to touch yourself anywhere but your dick. Run you hands over your body for me, please. Show me the areas that feel good to you. What are they?"

" My hips and my thighs. They're really sensitive." Alex said.

"Run your nails up your inner thigh just hard enough to leave red marks." Miles said "That feel good?" Alex merely nodded. " No, no Alex. When I ask you a question I expect you to answer me with your words, understood?"

"Yes," Alex said biting his lip.

"Good. Now I want to you spend a little time playing with your balls but don't you dare touch your shaft. Rub them nice and slow, can you feel how full they are? You haven't gotten off in such a long time, think about how good it's going to feel too empty them." Miles smirked watching Alex's motions as he played with himself.

"Gonna be so good," Alex whined.

"Good. Now lean back, put your feet up on the table if you need to but I want to see your legs spread nice and wide for the camera."

"Yes, Miles," Alex said moving into the position that was requested of him.

" Now, You're going to spit in your hand get your fingers good and coated in saliva. If you're comfortable with it I'd like to see you finger yourself please." Miles told him. His tone sounds calm and collected but inside he's anything but. The prospect of watching Alex finger himself has got him extremely excited. He knows he's going to have to excuse himself to get some relief when they're finished here. He can't just touch himself in front of Alex, it would be unprofessional of him.

Miles watch Alex desperately fucking himself with his own fingers for a good few minutes. Watching the boys pump his slim fingers in and out of his puckered entrance. He was watching Alex as if he were his favorite movie, at the moment he was. "Miles..." Alex eventually choked out.

"Yes, Alex?"

"Can I have more, please!" The boy sounded desperate in a way that made Miles' heart want to stop.

"Alright, get up on the table, on your knees, right in front of me," Miles instructed. Alex scrambled up onto the table top almost falling in the process. "Easy there tiger we don't need you to be getting hurt ." He smirked. " Now grab your cock. You can go ahead and stroke it. Start real slow, and I'll tell you when you can speed up. You're only allowed to touch the shaft, don't you dare rub the head or the slit until you're given permission. At this distance, I'll be able to see so don't think you can be sneaky and try to get it past me." Miles said.

"Yes, sir," Alex said starting to stroke himself waiting for Miles to tell him he can have more, but he doesn't. Miles just sits watching the boys as he throws his head back moaning and gasping desperately for a release that's not coming. Not yet anyways. Miles wants to see how long he can make Alex hold out. It's not until they're starting to run out of film and Alex's whole body is shaking that Miles decides it's time but before he can say a word Alex is already speaking.

"Please Miles, I gotta Cum. I can't take it anymore." He muttered. So he HAD reached a breaking point.

"Then you may do what you need to finish," Miles said. A couple of quick desperate rubs over the tip of his cock and Alex Came, letting the warm white liquid cover his hand, dripping onto the black tabletop and some of it even splashed it's way on to Miles' trousers.

"Holy shit, that was probably the best orgasm I've ever had," Alex said leaving back on the table. "Sorry about your pants."

"It's alright, it will wash out," Miles said turning off the camera. " Alright it's off, we're done."

"Oh right, then I'll just um... grab my things I guess." Alex said looking around for the bits of clothing he'd left all over the studio.

"... Alex." Miles said as the small boy slipped on his underwear.

"Hm?"

"I might know a very nice young lady who is looking for someone to move in with her. She's got a spare room and she's very lonely since her last roommate moved out. The guys was a bit of a prick. I can call her if you like. She needs to come by later this afternoon anyways to drop some things off. Maybe you could wait for her here to go and have a look at the room?" Miles suggested

"Yeah!" Alex smiled "I'd like that."

"Good, she's supposed to be here around five or six so it's only a couple of hours. I need to um.... relieve myself and then I'll go call her." Miles said looking down a bit ashamed at the sizable bulge in his pants.

"Oh, I got you that worked up? Need to go have a wank?" Alex laughed with a sleepy grin. What he says next surprised Miles. " I-if you want I could um... I could help you." He said biting his lip.

"Alex it wouldn't be professional of me to let you do that. It wasn't part of what we agreed upon but that's very sweet of you to offer." Miles said turning his back before he was tempted to give in to the still mostly naked boy who was resting on the couch again in little more than his lavender underwear that Miles was quickly becoming fond of.

"Ok, You mind if I close my eyes for a few minutes then? I'm exhausted." Alex yawned.

"Not at all," Miles smirked heading off to the back room of the studio. When he returns a little later He notices Alex is curled up in a ball on the couch, out like a light and shivering slightly. So Miles put a blanket over him and went to start looking back through the boy's film.

"Mi! You here?" A voice shouts into the room a while later. The sun is setting leaving only a faint glow in the otherwise dark studio. The only artificial source of light was over in the back corner where Miles desk was. He was editing some of the photographs from the day before that he'd taken of Alex when he'd heard the door open from the lift.

"Sssssh." Miles said quickly crossing the room. " He's asleep." He added pointing to Alex on the couch.

"Wore him out huh? Mi you know I love you but you really have got to stop screwing around with these little model boys. How old is he even? He looks like a baby."

"He's eighteen and I didn't fuck him alright Alexa. Do you think he'd still be here if I had?" Miles asked. " He's a sweet kid alright and He could really use someone to help him out." He said walking over to Alex and kneeling down next to the couch and shaking Alex's shoulder. " Al?"

"Mmm" Alex whined starting to open his eyes, he rubbed them letting his vision adjust to the change in light.

"Alex this is my friend Alexa she's the one I told you about who has the spare room. "Why don't you put your clothes on and come say hello?" It's then that Alex realizes there's a stranger in the room and he's still in only his underwear. Thank god for the blanket that was covering him. Where had that come from?

"H-hi, S-sorry I'm..." Alex couldn't find words to fit what he wanted to stay to Alexa. ' Indecient', 'Half asleep', 'A complete and utter train wreck' Instead he just looked up at Miles. " Have you seen my pants?"

"They're right here," Miles said handing Alex the pair that was on the floor next to the couch. He tried his best to maneuver getting his bodysuit and jeans on under the blanket before getting up to actually face Alexa.

"It's very nice to meet you." He said without making eye contact.

" No need to be shy Alex. I'm not going to hurt you. Miles said you were interested in renting out my spare room. I was thinking that you could come uptown with me to have a look at it if you'd like." Alexa said.

"Uh, um, yeah. I'd like that." Alex said rubbing the back of his head nervously.

"Great," Alexa said clapping her hands together. "Let's be on our way then shall we? Mi you want to tag along? Maybe grab dinner?"

"Nah, that's alright you two go ahead I have some things to finish up and it's probably best if you get aquinted with each other without me hanging over your shoulder." Miles said " But." He walked back to his desk jotting something down on a post it and handing it to Alex. " This is my personal cell. Use this instead of the number on the card I gave you alright. You can call or text me whenever, alright?"

"Alright." Alex smiled he likes the idea of being able to get in contact with Miles.

"Good," He said pulling the smaller boy in for a hug. " You did wonderfully today. I'm very proud of you." That made Alex's heart swell he's not used to anyone being proud of him. " Now off you go." Alex nodded walking towards the door with Alexa.

"Bye Miles!"

A few stops on the train later Alex found himself uptown near central park. He hadn't really been up this ways since moving to the city and seeing it even at night was exciting for him. "Miles seems to have taken a liking to you," Alexa said as they walked.

"Oh um... yeah he's very nice," Alex said smiling at Alexa.

"I've never seen him let a model just stay around like that, Especially one he hasn't slept with. He's got a bit of a reputation for that," Alexa said. " Love him but he's a bit of a whore."

"He hasn't tried anything with me," Alex said wondering suddenly if that meant that there was something wrong with him to deter Miles.

"I know he told me, that's why I said he must like you."

"I hope so.... he's the only friend I've made here so far." Alex admitted.

"Well, just don't get to attached to him if you can help it . He's not the kind of person that you want to be putting your faith in. He's got a habit of disappointing people. " Alexa said as she opened a door leading into what looked like a lobby area.

"Oh... ok," Alex said following after her.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I just think that you should be forwarned." Alexa shrugged hitting the up botton for the elevator. Once they step inside she puts a key into the lock next to the button for ' 30L' and it illuminates taking them up to the 30's floor. "Here we are. Home sweet home," she says when the door behind them opens. Alex shifts nervously on the balls of his feet looking around at the apartment. It's beautiful, nicer than any home he's ever seen before.

"Alexa I can tell you already I'm not going to be able to afford this. I was dishes for a living. I make next to nothing."

"Don't worry about it. I'm not really worried about Money I've been supporting this place on my own for a long time, but I get lonely here all by myself. What I'm really looking for is some companionship and maybe someone to help with the chores around the house."

"I'm a good cleaner," Alex said smiling at Alexa.

"Great, want to see your room then?" She asked, grabbing his hand and tugging him down the hall. She lead him the to the last door which swinging it open to reveal a rather spacious room at least twice the size of Nick's dorm room The walls on one side were painted in a calming blue tone while the walls that made up the corner of the building were made entirely of glass the view from the floor to ceiling windows overlooking central park.

"Wow," Was all Alex could manage to say.

"Pretty cool isn't it?" Alexa laughed at Alex's stunned reaction. Alex made his way over to the windows the bed was situated in the corner and was low to the ground as not to block the view.

"I've never seen anything like it!" Alex exclaimed kneeling on the bed to look out the window.

"Well if you want it it's yours I've been looking for someone to fill the spot for a while now," Alexa said.

"Oh yeah, Miles said the guy who lived here before was a bit of a prick," Alex said.

"Of course he'd say that." Alexa laughed. " This room used to be Miles' He was the one that lived here with me. Then he moved out to be closer to his studio, and he wanted to stay in the village. He liked it down there."

"Oh," Alex laughed.

"Well, I'll let you have a look around. Make yourself at home alright?" Alexa said walking out of the room.

Alex was still kneeling on the bed looking out the window over the park. In the past few days, it felt as though his life had taken a drastic and exciting turn all because of a kind stranger who had come to his aid. He couldn't help but wonder what other changes his new home in the city would hold for him but more than ever he was excited for the first time about the future.


	2. New Killer Star

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm having such fun with this experimenting with the new character dynamics. That also means that these chapters tend to come out a bit on the long side which means they might end up being a little more spaced out then the Aviation Chapters since I plan to keep them long rather than breaking them up into smaller sections. 
> 
> Aaaannnyways! Thank you to everyone who is putting in the effort to read this so far. I know it been a bit annoying ( thanks wattpad :| ) I really appreciate it. Let me know what you think! Hope you all enjoy! <3

Alex wakes up in the morning confused by his surroundings. At first, he thought he might still be dreaming. It looked as if he was suspended high up in the sky and would fall at any second. The immediate thought caused him to back away from the sight in front of him until he fell from the bed and remembered that the cause of his fear was merely windows. Once he'd tumbled to the floor ( not a very far distance considering that the bed was fairly low itself) He started to remember the events of the night before. He must have fallen asleep looking out the window shortly after Alexa had left the room. He'd been exhausted after all. Judging by the fact that he was still in his clothing and the sheets were still mostly in place it was easy to assume what happened.

He sighed, laying back on the bed and looking up at the ceiling for a moment before rolling over to look out at the park. How had he managed to get so lucky? Right time right place, that was the only explanation for it. Alexa seemed like a nice enough girl. Girls didn't usually set off as many red flags in Alex's head as boys did. Other boys had always been mean to him, but some of the girls at his school had taken pity on him and been kind. Alexa reminded him of those girls. She seemed sweet, excitable, and genuinely happy with the idea of keeping him around even though he had no ability to repay her. Not right now at least. When he became a famous writer he would be able to fix that. He just needed to find an inspiration for what he wanted to write about.

New York city up until now had been rather boring. He'd been settling in and unable to accomplish much in the way of exploration. So far the only time he'd ventured out was to the club where he'd met Miles. One of the waitresses had a particularly good shift at the diner and tipped him out a bit more than usual. She was an older woman, no family of her own who took pity on him. "Go have some fun. You haven't seen anything here yet."

Luckily for Alex, he didn't have to work today. He most likely would never have been able to find his way back to the village on his own. It was Sunday, so he was free. It's only as he thought about the dorms that he remembered he hadn't told Nick where he was. He reached for his phone and as expected he had several dozen missed calls and messages.

"Hey, when are you going to be home?"

"We're heading to a pub around the corner for dinner. Want us to wait for you?"

"Alex, is everything alright?"

"Al? Where are you it's getting late!"

"Alex?"

"ALEX?!"

"CALL ME RIGHT NOW ALEX!"

"ALEXANDER PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOU'RE OK!"

"I'M GOING TO GO BEAT THAT CREEPY FUCK'S FACE IN IF YOU DON'T CALL ME THIS INSTANT!"

How typical of Nick to worry. He always worried over Alex no matter what the situation. Alex quickly called him to relieve some of the worries. Nick, of course, picked up on the first ring.

"ALEXANDER DAVID TURNER WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU? DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED I'VE BEEN ABOUT YOU I NEARLY-"

"I'm fine Nick, calm down I'm sorry. I was going to call you but then I feel asleep and I." Alex paused to yawn " Just woke up."

"Jesus christ Al, just give me some warning next time would you. Ya scared me half to death. I was thinking something happened to you." Nick sighed.

"Nah, better than ever really." Alex couldn't help the smile that took over his sleepy features.

"How was yesterday with Miles?" Nick asked.

"Good, had a lot of fun actually. I was... I don't even quite know how to describe what happened yesterday it was like I became someone else for a while and it felt amazing!" Alex said.

"He didn't try anything funny with you did he?"

"No, no course not. He was very professional about the whole thing. As professional as you can be when someone's doing something like that in front of you anyways! I did get him hard though. He had to go in the back and finish off when we were done." Alex laughed.

"Oooh, someone must like the look of you Turner. So did you end up spending the night with him? You over there now?" Nick is curious now, maybe Alex was starting to like Miles?

"No, I actually found an apartment. Well, sort of. Miles had a friend who was looking for someone to move in. He used to live with her and she's been a bit lonely since he moved out. She'd not even going to charge me rent as long as I help with all the chores and stuff. I think she just wanted some company and... Nick you have GOT to see this place. It's a dream. It's something right out of a movie!"

"I'd love to see it Al, but I have study group right now. How about I come by later maybe I can drop your stuff off." Nick said.

"You would officially be the greatest friend ever if you did." Alex laughed. " I'll send you the address as soon as I find out what it is. You're going to freak when you see this place I swear."

"Alright, I'll call you when I'm done for the day. Bye Al."

"Bye Nick."

"Morning sleepy head." A voice said from by the door. Alex looked up to see Alexa leaned against his doorway in Yoga pants and a tank top. "I left you alone for five minutes last night and when I came back you were out like a light. I guess that means you'll take the room?"

"If you don't mind." Alex blushed looking down at his feet.

"Not at all! I was hoping you'd say yes. You seem much more agreeable than Miles ever was." She joked.

"I'm pretty easy like that." Alex smiled.

"Good, so you got anything planned for the day?" Alexa inquired.

"No, haven't got work today. My friend Nick is going to come by later with my stuff if that's alright. I need to send him the address. He won't get done with his study group till about four or five." Alex said.

"And where does he go to school?" Alexa asked walking over to sit on the edge of the bed next to Alex.

"NYU," Alex replied.

"Are you going to school there too?"

"No, I can't afford school, but I did manage to get myself over here with him." Alex was still proud of the fact that he'd made it all the way across the Atlantic on his own.

"He your boyfriend then? You know you can-"

"NOOOOO, no no no no nooo," Alex said quickly. " Nick is not my boyfriend. We're just best friends. I mean, he's gay too but no!"

"Well, he's still your friend so he's welcome here anytime as long as you're living with me," Alexa said winking at Alex.

"Thanks." He said playing with the corner of the sheet.

"So, since you have nothing to do today. Why don't you get up and go shower and we'll go do something fun? I'll lend you some clean clothes. You're pretty small it shouldn't be hard to find something in my closet to fit you." Alexa winked. " Bathroom is the door right across from yours. Anything in there is stuff Miles left, so help yourself to It."

"oh right thanks," Alex said getting up from the bed. " um, thanks a lot by the way for giving me a place." He said rubbing the back of his head.

"Alex you look like a nice kid and you seem like someone trustworthy. You're not handing around Miles cause of who he is and I doubt you have any idea who I am. You're just a nice kid that's what Miles and I have been looking for." Alexa said.

"I knew Miles was a big photographer, but not when I met him. My friend Nick knew who he was cause he's a fine arts student. That's all I knew and not until after he'd invited me to his studio." Alex shrugged. "I don't really care about things like that."

"I think that's why he called me about you. He sees you aren't one of those social climbers he usually hangs around with." Alexa said. At the same time, they heard a buzzer at the door.

"go get yourself cleaned up ok? I'll get it." Alex nodded scurrying off to the bathroom.

When he came out, wet-haired with the clothes that Alexa left for him; A pair of dark wash skinny jeans and a light blue v-neck t-shirt he wandered into the kitchen to find Alexa and oddly enough Miles.

" I'm surprised you actually surfaced from the village," Alexa said

"I uh." Miles started when Alex cleared his throat making him smile. " I just thought I'd bring some coffee over," he said. " It's Reggios from down in the village. Alex, I got your regular coffee with Milk cause I wasn't sure what you liked." He said looking over at Alex.

"Oh, my favorite!"Alexa said grabbing her cup. " Alex, c'mere. Coffee! Now Mi, don't lie to me and tell me you came all the way up from the village just to bring coffee by."

"No, no I'm meeting Matt in the area for brunch and I wanted to see how you two were getting on. Thought maybe you would like to join us." Miles said.

"Think we're going to pass on that, I was going to take Alex to The Met if he's interested." Alexa smiled over the top of her coffee.

"Oh for god sake Alexa don't bore the boy to death." Miles protested before Alex interrupted.

 

"Actually I'd love to go to The Met. Sounds right up my alley. I rather like art." He said taking the coffee he assumed was for him. " Hell, that's good."

"Little place down on MacDougal street. Been there since the 20's they know how to make a good cup of coffee. So do you like it here Alex."

"Very much, but how come you didn't tell me it was your room?" Alex asked.

"I didn't want to give you the wrong impression about my intentions," Miles replied.

"I didn't read any intention at all from it, thank you, though, for introducing us," Alex said.

"I think we're going to be great friends aren't we Alex?" Alexa ask.

"Alex and Alexa, what a pair you'll make... Well, I've got to be off Matt's expecting me. I just wanted to stop by quickly. Oh, and You'll both be coming to the film festival right? It's on Friday." Miles told them.

"We'll be there Miles don't worry. Especially your little star here I'll bring him to the club, keep the wolves at bay." Alexa winked.

"Excellent. I've got a slammed week until then I'll actually be in London Tuesday until Thursday for a shoot but, Alex, you can call or text if you need. Oh and here." Miles said pulling an envelope from his bag "Payment for helping me with my project."

"We didn't agree on any payment," Alex said without taking the envelope.

"You didn't think you were doing it for free, did you? I'm a professional, my models are always paid no matter what capacity they work for me in. It's nothing crazy just the basic fee don't be weird about it just take it. You earned it." Mile winked. "Well I'm off. See you both soon and Alexa you best be nice to him."

"As If I would ever be anything but. Bye Miles!" She said practically pushing him out the door. "That was so strange he never comes around here anymore. Much less shows up just to drop off coffee. Must have been thinking about you kid." She said patting Alex's shoulder.

She went on speaking, but Alex was hardly paying attention staring instead at the envelope in his hands. He eventually convinced himself to slide his thumbnail into the side and open it shocked to see that it contained $350. "Wow." He muttered.

"Hm? How much did he give you?" Alexa asked.

"More than I've made at my regular job that's for sure." Alex was amazed

"Eh, he could have done better,r but yeah that's what he pays the new kids. I thought he'd have favored you a little more, to be honest. Probably thinks you'd get nervous if he gave you something too generous for your work." Alexa said still sipping her coffee.

"What do you mean too generous. This is already... wow. This great! And for not doing much of anything either."Alex smiled.

"Keep him happy and you can keep those checks coming until he finds someone he likes better than you. Although." Alexa shrugged.

"Although what?" Alex asked.

"Giving you his old room, dropping by to check up on you. Like I said last night I think he's fond of you, as a subject at least. I wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea, love interests are not Miles' thing. His camera, though, his camera falls in love much easier than he does. He'll probably try to groom you into one of his little muses he's got running around." Alexa said.

"Oh... Is Matt Miles boyfriend?" Alex asked. Alexa nearly choked on her coffee.

"What makes you ask that?"

"He just... The night I met him he said something about Matt. He was with him the other day when I literally RAN into them in the village. Now he's meeting him today. I just in the time I've known Miles most of it, he's spent with Matt. Then yesterday when I showed up there was this Guy named... Jameh, I think his name was jameh and he was just leavin' as I was going in." Alex said.

"... god dammit, Jamie. Do you remember what he looked like Alex?" Alexa asked.

"Bit taller them me. Sorta scraggly shaggy hair, sporty dressed, carrying a big bag. I couldn't tell you much else I only saw him making his way to the lift." Alex said.

"Hold on a minute Alex," Alexa said reaching for her phone to call Miles.

"You change your mind about joining us then love?" Miles asked. He'd just sat down with Matt at a little cafe' around the corner.

" What's this I hear about Jamie Cook being ' round your studio Miles? I told you to cut that shit out!" Alexa said into the phone. Alex just stayed quiet and sipped his coffee not wanting to be involved in any argument he might have accidentally caused.

"For god sake, Alexa will you back off it's fine," Miles said rolling his eyes, although eh couldn't see it Matt sure could.

"It's really not and you know it isn't. I thought you were done playing that game." Alexa groaned.

"I'm not playing any games, Alexa. Jamie is still a friend he just stopped over while he was nearby." Miles said. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm with Matt and I don't need a telling off right now from you." He said before hanging up his phone.

"Leave it up to Miles Kane to always be a massive disappointment," Alexa said putting her phone down after Miles had hung up on her.

"So, You've seen Jamie recently Eh?" Matt asked recently.

 

"He was near the studio and stopped by for a few minutes to say hello that's all," Miles said scratching a bit at his nose.

"Really? That's all? I thought you were over that whole bit Miles."

"yes, really. You and Alexa act like you're such saints like you don't do the same shite I do." Miles said leaning his chair back on two legs while his arms crossed over his chest.

"No, but... Miles, you have to admit you take things a little to far sometimes." Matt sighed.

"I do NOT. I'm perfectly in control and I don't need someone who wakes up with not one but sometimes two different girls in his bed in the morning to tell me how to run my life." Miles said. He's not a teenager, he can care for himself.

"Are you high right now?" Matt asked.

"What? NO! Of course not why would I be?" Miles asked.

 

"Because you're jittery and defensive," Matt said taking a drink from his orange juice rather than looking at Miles.

"I'm defensive because you and Alexa are making false accusations again. Now if you wouldn't mind I came to have a nice chat with my mate over some bloody Marys now can we do that?" Miles asked still not changing his posture any.

"alright, alright calm down Mi. So what did you want to talk about?" Matt asked.

"Gosh, I was in such a good mood when I got here but now you've spoiled it and I've forgotten what I was so happy about," Miles said.

"Stop being such a child and talk to me already. How's your project going?" That's when Miles remembered why he'd been in such a cheery mood before. Alex.

"Oh, yeah it's going great. I've finished it actually." Miles said.

"I thought you still needed more boys for it. Said you wanted five. Did you find them that quickly you beast?" Matt laughed.

"No, I've decided to cut it down. I'm only using one tape. Unedited in its entirety." Miles said.

"Really? That's a pretty gutsy move." Matt said, adding a dash more sugar to his coffee and stirring it in so that the spoon clanked against the inside of the cup.

"I'm going to use Alex's tape," Miles said.

"Alex .... Alex.... which one is Alex? I don't remember an Alex." Matt inquired, setting the spoon to the side.

"The one who ran into you the other day. The boy I met at the sub, I mean club." Miles corrected quickly.

"You think it's good enough to win on its own?" Matt asked.

"He's brilliant. He was so different from the other boys. So creative and full of life and his story just... It's spoke something to me. I'm hoping it will touch other people the same way. With the other models, it's like they had this ability to shut off once the camera turned on. Everything was dry and the minimum of what I asked. They're interested in the pay and possibility of fame." Miles sighed.

"Unfortunately that comes a bit with being who you are doesn't it?" Matt asked. He knows it's true.

"Alex though, Alex I don't think could care a bit about that if he tried." Miles smiled at the thought of it. "He's shy and sweet but there's just... something magnetic about him. He draws you in like some sort of hypnotist and there's nothing you can do about it."

"You know who else they say has that effect on people Mi? Serial killers. Very charismatic and charming." Matt pointed out.

"I highly doubt Alex is a serial killer. He's just a kid who's new here and having a rough go of it. He's actually taking the spare room at my old place for the time being with Alexa." Miles said.

"You lost your mind, you know what kind of message it sends to one of your little fuck buddies if you let them stay in your room that's just asking for-"

"Matt, I didn't have sex with him," Miles said. Matt slammed his hands down on the table.

"Well, now I've officially seen everything." He said turning to one of the passing waitresses. " Excuse me miss. Do you know if hell has frozen over? Perhaps seen any signs of an oncoming plague, cause I'm now thoroughly convinced the world is ending."

"Matt would you stop that... He's a virgin I wasn't going to pressure him into something like that... You'll understand when you see the video on Friday." Miles looked away taking a drink of his bloody marry and swallowing hard. " This needs more Tabasco."

"So how far is The Met from here then?" Alex asked as he walked with Alexa.

"Only a few blocks actually It's not too far. There's part of it that actually looks out into central park." Alexa replied.

"Wonderful, I've been wanting to see it but I didn't really have the money too," Alex said hanging his head.

"You can always come see the Met. It's a suggested donation fee but you can donate anything you want. Even if you just want to offer them the change in the bottom of your pocket." Alexa said.

"Oh, if I'd known that I'd have come a lot sooner," Alex said.

"I used to come here a lot when I first moved to New York for that exact reason. I could spend hours with my headphone on just wandering through the exhibits."

"What's your favorite?" Alex asked.

"I'll show you in a bit, but for now." Alexa said starting up the large stone steps that lead up to the museum's main entrance. "we're going to have a seat right here."

"What on the steps. Aren't we going to see the museum?" Alex asked.

"We will. All in good time Alex. You live right down the street now. What's your hurry? I love it out here on the steps. It's one of my favorite places in the city." Alexa told him.

"Why's that?"

"Because I love to people watch. I don't know if Miles told you, but I'm a fashion designer and I like to design for all sorts of people. To do that it helps to see a lot off different kinds of people. One of my favorite thingswhenI was just starting out was I would come here and pick out people in the crowd that I thought looked interesting. Then I would sketch something just for them that I thought they might like based on their street clothes and what I could observe about their personality." Alexa said.

 

"That's cool actually. I'd never have thought about doing something like that." Alex said.

 

"You should start to think that way more. It would work the same for writing. Make up backstories or short little adventures about the people you see. Who are they in their everyday lives. What brought them here today. Like you see that woman there in the cherry print sundress?" Alexa asked nodding towards a woman standing at the bottom of the steps looking around.

"Yeah, what about her?" Alex asked.

"Who do you think she's waiting for?" Alexa asked.

"I dunno, a friend? Maybe a date?"

"Be more creative than that! C'mon Alex use your imagination." Alexa pushed.

"Alright... alright. See how she's standing near the hot dog cart? She lost her dog here about a week ago right here by the steps. So she comes out here every day hoping that the smell of the cart will lure her dog back to her." Alex said.

"Great, and give me another one for her," Alex coaxed.

"Her hair looks like it's from the 1950's and so does her dress maybe she's been waiting here since then. He boyfriend was supposed to meet her here when he returned home from war. He'd told her to meet him here because he was planning to propose on the steps because this is where they had their first date, but he never came home." Alex told her.

"Is she a ghost?" Alexa questioned.

"No, she's just frozen in time, too afraid to let anything change in the hope that if she doesn't let time pass then he could still return to her."

"Now do you see why I like to come here?" Alexa asked.

"I do, this is fun... but I don't know how long I can sit still for," Alex said, his legs are already vibrating.

"Then how about once around the museum?" Alexa asked. Alex just gave her an enthusiastic nod.

They don't return home to their apartment until Nick had texted Alex to say he was on the way over. Alexa had stepped out to go and pick up dinner, because neither of them felt much like cooking, While Alex waited for Nick to get there. He waited outside the building with his new keys in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He stomped it out as soon as he saw Nick coming up the sidewalk. " Alex!" He called to him.

"Hey!" Alex waved back. He ran over to Nick and took his backpack as well as the two suitcases Nick was dragging. " Thanks for bringing my stuff up. I'd probably have gotten lost going back. I have no clue how I'll get to work tomorrow." Alex groaned.

"Shouldn't be too bad as long as you don't go the wrong way." Nick joked as Alex punched the door code to get into the building. " Wow, this place is fancy Al."

"I know. I feel so out of place." Alex admitted."While I was out here waiting for you every person that went in or came out I swear were looking at me like I'd done something wrong." Alex said pressing the floor number as they got into the elevator.

"Alex this is insane. I can't believe you live here." Nick said looking around in Awe as he stepped into the apartment.

"Alexa says you're welcome to come over anytime you want. Maybe you could spend days that you're not in class up here with me? I don't want us to... You know, start getting distant from each other." Alex said. His heart couldn't take it if Nick started to drift away from him.

"Sure Alex, until you get a boyfriend and forget about me." Nick laughed.

"Not going to happen." Alex laughed. "Here come check out my room!" Nick's jaw hit the floor when he saw the windows.

"Mate you must be the luckiest guy on the planet to have just walked into this," Nick said.

" I never expected it. I met Miles and everything just sort of... I'm still wondering what the catch is to it all."

" Is the roommate Crazy?" Nick asked.

"No, Alexa's been very kind and she even let me borrow some of her clothes cause I didn't have anything to wear today. I actually feel pretty good but she's jealous that my bum looks better in these jeans then hers.

"Alex and Alexa... you've got to be kidding me," Nick said putting his hand over his face.

"What?"

"Alex...and Alexa," Nick repeated.

"And?"

"Alex...and... Alexa." Nick said again.

"What about us?" Alex asked.

"You don't find it even the littlest but funny?"

"Find what funny?" by now Alex is thoroughly confused and Nick is getting a little frustrated.

"That you names are Alex and Alexa!" He shouted at him.

"I don't get where you're coming from."

"Alexander and Alexa is like Alex squared. There's two of you but one is a girl and one is...an androgynous woodland creature that I call a best friend."

"I am not a woodland creature." Alex pouted.

"Well no not now you're not. you're obviously going to be a city boy soon. Aren't you glad I convinced you to go to that first shoot?" Nick smirked.

"I wasn't going to go until I ran into-"

"Don't lie to me Al you'd have gone anyways," Nick said laying across Alex's new bed and looking out the window. "This is lovely."

"I know, but I woke up here this morning and thought I was going to fall." Alex laughed.

"You would, wouldn't you." Nick laughed along as well. "So, how are things going with Miles." He asked once they'd both settled down.

"What do you mean?" Alex asked.

"How was your shoot yesterday," Nick asked. " Like what happened?"

"Pretty cut and dry really. I went over to his studio. He asked a bunch of questions, I got off. It was a nice time." Alex said.

"That's it?" Nick asked.

"Well yeah why wouldn't it be?" Alex asked. " Well, there was one other thing actually."

"And what was that?"

"He um... He told me how he wanted me to wank myself. I mean..." Alex bit his lip. " I asked him to tell me how he wanted me to do it."

Nick was stunned by Alex's admission. " No way!"

"Is that weird? I don't know if that's weird. Fuck, and then he called Alexa when we were done and I waited with him at the studio until She came by and then we came here!"

"That's not weird but the rest of it is a little... Ok so I asked around school a little today and apparently, Miles has quite the reputation for-" Alex cut nick off.

"No, no don't tell me, please. I've heard enough from Alexa, but right now he's one of the few people I consider a friend here and I'd like to keep it that way. I don't care what he's known for doing cause he hasn't tried to do anything I'm not comfortable with. Simple as that." Alex said.

"So you know?" Nick asked.

"Alexa said some things and I have come to my own conclusions," Alex said.

"Just be careful if you're going to keep hanging around with him Al. Are you sure he hasn't tried to make any moves on you and you're just too oblivious to know." Nick asked. It's a valid question with Alex, really.

"No. I mean when we got done with the shoot. I took a nap on his couch. He woke me up when Alexa got there and then we left, and-" Alex was about to say he hadn't seen him since, but then he remembered that morning. "Actually... He stopped by this morning on his way to meet his friend Matt -"

"Helders, yeah there's a lot on social media of them together." Alex just stared blankly at Nick. " What! If you're going to hang out with him in real life I have every right to internet stalk him...for reasons of your safety!" Alex just rolled his eyes.

"So Matt right, anyways he came by to see if Alexa and I were getting on alright and he said that he's going to London for a few days but like... you know to call him or text him or whatever." Alex mumbled the last bit

"Alex you're dumb if you don't think he likes you!" Nick said.

"He doesn't ok! And if you'd met him then maybe you'd see that. He's made it clear that I'm younger than he expected and he's not interested. He's just helping me out, really I get more of a big brother type vibe from him which is probably why he hasn't tried to fuck me!" Alex insisted.

"If he tried would you let him?" Nick asked honestly.

"NO! Maybe... I dunno! If things changed? Maybe, if we had feelings for each other, sure? As of now no." Alex sighed staring into the blanket like it held some sort of answer.

"What sort of big brother gets off on telling you how to-"

"I didn't mean like a real older brother Nick! You know what I meant!" Alex groaned hiding his face in the blankets to avoid showing how red his cheeks were. " WHY DID I EVEN TELL YOU THAT!"

It takes a few days before Alex finally decides to give in and text Miles. It's after he comes home from a particularly hard day at work. Alexa was already asleep and there was no way Alex was going to disturb her. Being five hours ahead in London, Miles would be up by now as it was well into the next morning.

Alex: Hey Miles, How's London?

Alex waits a bit wondering whether or not he's going to get an answer. Meanwhile across the ocean Miles was just getting out of the shower. He was drying his damp hair when he looked down at his phone to see a text from Alex. That was an unexpected, although not unpleasant, want to start his morning.

Miles: Not bad. Been working mostly. Got this morning free so I've been taking my time getting up.

Alex had all but given up hope of getting a reply when his phone beeps.

Alex: Oh, I'm sorry if I woke you up :[

Miles: you didn't! But why are you awake so late love?

Alex: Worked the graveyard shift at the Diner. Didn't get off till four, so I'm just getting home now.

Miles: How was work? Have you talked to them about becoming a server yet?

Alex sighed. On the day of his first shoot with Miles Alex had told him how he'd rather be waiting tables then bussing them. At least then the money would be a little better.

Alex: I don't think that's going to happen. I got in trouble today :[

Miles: Oh, and what did you do to get yourself in trouble Alexander?

Alex: I didn't do anything!

 

Alex: All I wanted to do was look nice. I have to keep my hair pulled back at work. So, I put this cute bow in my hair today. Same way A BUNCH OF THE GIRLS WERE WEARING THEM.

Miles: And you got in trouble for that.

Alex: My boss made me take it saying it made me look ' too gay'

Alex: It's the village for fuck sake can't we even win a home game?

Miles: That's not very fair. I bet you looked cute with it in your hair.

Miles is surprised when the next thing he receives is a photo of Alex. He was kneeling on his bed in his pajamas ( what looked like an oversized Beatles T-shirt and not much else from what Miles can tell) and the bow in question.

Alex: Sorry about the pajamas, I was about to get in bed. Just look at the bow.

Miles: You look good Alex, Even in your pajamas.

Alex: Now it's your turn. You send me a picture of you!

Miles looked down at himself. He was standing in front of the mirror in nothing more than workout shorts With his hair still wet and messy. He snapped a photo anyways sending it to Alex.

Miles: I'm boring, just got out of the shower.

 

Alex: Nothing boring about those Abs :D lol.

Alex isn't sure where it comes from but he always feels like being a bit playful when it comes to Miles. He looks the message for several seconds before deciding to send it. Miles wasn't entirely sure how to respond. Was this Alex's attempt to flirt with him? Should he humor him and flirt back? Does he actually want to flirt back? Before he can think of a response Alex sends him another photo. This time his hair was down the lights in his room off leaving only the lights coming in through the window. He was laying in bed covered with sheet Miles could easily recognize as ones that used to be his. His shirt seemed to be sliding down a bit showing just a bit of Alex's neck and shoulder. It's then that Miles decides that he indeed wants to flirt back. Little does he know seconds after sending it Alex is having a minor panic attack over the fact that he ACTUALLY sent it.

Alex: I can't go to sleep.

Miles: I might be able to help you with that?

Alex: Oh? How?

Miles: I could help you get off again if you like. You seemed to enjoy that the last time.

Alex: I thought that was a one-time thing?

Miles: Doesn't have to be if you would like it to happen again. Although, this isn't strictly professional. Consider it friends just messing around a little to help you get to bed.

Alex: So how do we do this? Do you tell me what to do or???

Miles: How about you send me a photo of what's under your T-shirt.

Alex: There's nothing under it.

Miles: So you sleep with no underwear on?

Alex: I usually sleep with nothing on but I've been getting cold.

It's only another minute or so until Miles receives a picture of Alex, Already hard with his hand wrapped around his shaft and the hem of his shirt held up by his teeth. Miles is very interested now.

Miles: Well don't you look pretty with that nice little cock of yours in your hand. Are you going to rub it for me?I bet you already were even though I didn't tell you to yet.

He taps out the message and sends it. Needless to say, it's not the first time Miles has done something like this. He gets the feeling that it's not something Alex has done before. He's got nothing better to do this morning so he decided to lay back on the hotel bed taking his time to look at the picture and plan his next move.

Alex: Do you think you could send me something nice to look at, please?

Miles: Not until you answer my question. Were you already touching yourself before I told you to Alex? I thought you wanted me to help you.

Alex: Yes... D:

Miles: If You're going to do as you please then why would ask for my help only to just do what you want anyways.

Alex: Didn't ask for it. You offered your services :P

Miles: Alexander don't get smart with me or you'll get nothing.

Alex: Ok, Ok I'll behave!

Miles decides to give in to Alex's request. He pulled down his shorts giving his cock a few quick strokes to get himself the rest of the way hard before snapping a picture and sending it to Alex.

Alex: OH FUCK! You're huge.

Miles: Thank you Alex. It would be nice to have a pretty boy to come and pleasure me, but I guess I'll have to do it myself. If you were here would you suck it for me?

Alex: No...

Miles: I'm sorry Alex, was that too far? This is all just talk I wouldn't eve expect that of you.

Alex: NO! No, I would like to! I've just only done it a couple times before what if I'm not good at it and I disappoint you?

 

Miles: I'm sure you'd be just fine. I'm easy to please. Just make it wet and use your tongue.

Alex: So is that something you actually want me to do then?

Miles: Sometime, if you're up for it then sure.

Alex pauses for a moment thinking about what to type next. He'd been hearing things from all different fronts. Nick thinks Miles likes him. Alexa obviously said that Miles is thinking of Alex and she knows Miles far better than he does. Hell, Miles himself is even showing interest in him proven by the fact that this is the second time Alex has managed to get him hard. He also seems to have very kind words for Alex most often. That brings him to the next texts he sends, biting his lip as he types it out.

 

Alex: Then Does that Mean that you're interested?

Miles sighed. He will admit that he does have some interest in Alex. He finds him fascinating and magnetic. The notion that he may have any interest in him though that wasn't strictly business related or casually as friends were something Miles had hoped to avoid with the younger man.

Miles: Alex, I've got to go take care of something. You try and get some sleep, will you? I'll see you on Friday.

Alex takes the dismissal of his inquiry as a no, and Miles goes to take a cold shower, deleting the photos from his phone and trying to think less about the boy who sent them.

Days pass and finally Friday rolls around. It's only been two days since they've spoken, yet to Alex, it feels like forever. He's started to get closer with Alexa which has helped stop him from getting lonely. Nick comes around most days when he gets out of class. He said he'd come stay the night over the weekend if Alex wanted, but the hope of what might happen when he saw Miles again made him reluctant to say yes. Maybe it was just a coincidence that Miles had needed to go and do something. Maybe it wasn't a lie to get out of their conversation. Alex had tormenting himself for days wondering how he could have been so stupid. Why had he said something like that when he knew it couldn't be true. Miles was just talking dirty to him to help him get off, that's what people do. He was obviously not interested in actually doing these things with him.

"Alex, why aren't you getting ready? We need to be leaving soon you silly boy." Alexa said walking into his room. She was already dressed for the night. Her outfit was made entirely of latex. The top of the dress around the bust area was solid black and tapered down into the skirt which was striped in black and red. Her lips matched the hue of red while her heels were black and possibly the highest that Alex had ever seen before. He couldn't help but stare, only to come back to his senses a moment later.

" I don't think I'm going to go..." Alex said.

"What? Why not?" Alexa asked. " You're one of the stars of the movie! Don't you want to be there if it wins."

" I don't know... I've never really been to a club like this before and I have nothing to wear." Alex sighed. He'd picked through everything he Owned, nothing really seemed appropriate and seeing Alexa in a dress like that just made him realize how out of place he was going to feel. On top of that, he hadn't told her about the conversation he had with Miles. Part of him just wanted to hide in bed and avoid Miles for the rest of his life out of shame.

"Aw, honey. You don't need to be nervous. I'll be right there with you and as far as not having anything to wear that's easy to fix." Alexa said walking over to Alex and offering him a hand up off the bed. " C'mon."

Alex took Alexa's hand and followed her into her bedroom. It was obviously bigger then and his and actually decorated rather than just being a bed in the corner and a few open suitcases with things flung about. Alex couldn't help but admire Alexa's impeccable taste in décor. She walked over and opened up her closet, a walk in of course. Although they're extremely tough to find in New york she had to have one! She's a designer for god sake! Of course, she has way too much clothing and needs a place to store it! " Wow..." Alex gasped, a bit in Awe.

"You can borrow anything you like. Most of it should fit you. Anything in mind?" Alexa asked.

"Um, I don't know... something simple. I don't really like things that are too flashy... Maybe black?" Alex asked.

After deliberating and trying on several things that failed Alexa finally had an idea. " Alex, have you ever worn a dress before?" she asked.

"What? Um, no... I don't have any and I've always been a little nervous about it but... I dunno. If I found the right one I would." Alex said. Alexa picked through a couple more things before pulling something out of her closet.

" I wouldn't suggest wearing this many other places. It's a lot of skin, but for where we're going it's perfect," she said handing it to Alex. The dress was simple and black, the two things that he wanted. It seemed fairly loose which made Alex slightly more comfortable as he put it over his head, examining himself in the mirror. Although it hung off his hips without touching them it still showed off his body. It was a halter neck with a metal buckle at the nape of his neck and no back leaving the skin exposed all the way down to just above the top of his bum. The hemline wasn't overwhelmingly short but it was by no means conservative, coming a bit above his knee. Something about the way it looked him made Alex feel great.

"I like this. It's nice." Alex said.

"Here put these on with it," Alexa said handing Alex a pair of sheer black tights and black heeled booties. " And if you really want to drive Miles mad then ditch the underwear. The club we're going to isn't really like a normal nightclub so if you accidentally show a little too much no one is going to care." She said winking at Alex and making him blush.

"Really?" Alex asked, slipping his underwear down his legs and putting the tights on.

"Yeah, expect there to be some nudity tonight, especially if you go upstairs. Clothes aren't a requirement upstairs but in the lounge they expect you to keep them mostly on." Alexa said.

"What's upstairs?" Alex asked.

"Oh, the dungeon sweetie. I thought you knew this was a fetish club." Alexa said.

"I... I knew it was different, but I wasn't entirely sure what it meant." Alex said. He hadn't done any research about the place, knowing it would send his anxiety into a frenzy if he did. "Is it like... is it a sex club then?"

"In a sense. Penetration is strictly prohibited in the public play areas, but there are private rooms you can use. So in that sense, it's not like people are going to be shagging all over the place. Mostly it's about scene play. It gives people access to things that they might not have at home. Of course, it's a hangout or the fetish community, but its primary function is as a BDSM dungeon." Alexa explained.

"So are you into all that then? BDSM I mean?" Alex asked.

"Yes very much so. That's actually how Miles, Matt and I know each other. We were all part of the scene back in London when we were younger. The three of us decided to all move to the states together." Alexa said.

"So are you an um..." Alex isn't really sure how to ask his next question or if he even wants to know.

"I'm a dominant." Alexa supplied. " And my current girlfriend Eva is a switch."

"Oh, so you're gay too then?" Alex asked. For some reason, he hadn't been expecting that.

"I wouldn't say that I'm gay necessarily. I like men too. I don't really feel the need to put a label on what my sexuality is. I like who I like at the time, what's between their legs or how they identify really makes no difference to me."

 

" That's cool... a girl kissed me once when we were like thirteen. I cried. After that, I was pretty sure I was gay." Alex said. Alexa couldn't help but laugh. "... What is Miles?"

 

"It's pretty obvious isn't it? He's a Dom. Now, let me help you with your makeup and then we need to get going." She said

Alex looks nervously at the club door. There's no sign or marquee. Nothing about the outside suggested that beyond the doors lay a night club other than a small metal plaque with the words 'Shadow play' On it.

"Kind of a strange place for a nightclub," Alex said looking at their surroundings.

"Well, the goal is to be discreet. If you don't know it's here and what it is then we don't necessarily want you to find it." Alexa shrugged opening the door. Inside the lights were dim in the small entry way. There was a small window with a girl standing behind it. She wore a plain dark blue dress and looked rather bored at the moment. " Do you have your phone with you?" Alexa asked Alex.

"Yes," Alex said.

"Alright, you're going to leave it here with Arielle. You're not allowed to have it inside." Alexa said pulling hers out of her purse.

"Can I ask why?" Alex asked.

"Because discression is key here and we don't want anyone taking photos or videos in the club that could possibly lead to someone being outed. This is a safe space for people to express their desires and we'd like to keep it that way." Alexa said walking Over to the desk.

"Hi Arielle, how's your night going?" Alexa asked putting both her and Alex's phones on the counter.

"It's alright. I'd rather be in there with everyone else, but I drew the short end of the stick on the schedule this week." The brunette girl shrugged. " Who's your new friend?"

"This is Alex. He's one of the boys that's in Miles Film," Alexa said. Alex nodded and gave Arielle a shy smile and a wave.

 

"Of course he is." Arielle laughed. " Better be careful with that one he's nothing but trouble. I'm going to need to see your ID, Alex." She said.

 

"I'm eighteen. I promise." Alex checking his wallet for his ID card.

"I believe you but I have to check everyone who isn't a regular." Arielle smiled at him taking the ID for a moment before handing it back to Alex. "You two have fun. I think Miles is up pretty soon."

"Thanks, Arielle, see you later!" Alexa said walking towards the other side of the room where a black curtain hung across the doorway. " Miles won last time so his film will go last if I'm right. We've already probably missed the majority of them."

"Oh, uh, ok," Alex said. He's not necessarily looking forward to seeing himself naked on screen. As it turns out they'd walking in between films. Beyond the curtain was a large parlor looking lounge area filled currently with chairs and couches all aligned with a large projector screen. The room was filled with people all in various states and styles of dress from men in business suits, to girls in corsets, and even a couple wearing brightly colored body suits that covered them from head to toe. At the moment the screen was dark and everyone was standing around socializing.

It doesn't take long for a familiar voice to pierce through the buzzing chatter of the room and meet Alex's ears. "ALEX! ALEXA!" Miles called out to them waving them over to where he was standing. Alexa grabbed Alex's hand pulling him in through the crowd over to where Miles stood with a shaggy-haired boy at his side. "Well don't you both look lovely tonight." He said, kissing Alexa's cheek and smiling at Alex though he made no move at any sort of physical greeting towards him.

"You're not doing too bad yourself Kane," Alexa said. Miles had on a pair of tight black leather pants his top was a matching black leather vest with a zipper down the front of it that was currently unzipped just the smallest amount. In his hand, he held a chain leash that was strapped the the collar of the shaggy haired boy standing next to him in little more than tight jeans and the leather around his neck.

"Alex this is my friend Jay. Jay this is Alex, the one that I was telling you about. You may say hello if you wish." Miles told the collared boy.

"Hi there. Nice to meet you. Miles was telling me that you were in the movie too!" Jay said smiling at Alex. So this was one of the other boys then.

"um... Hi." Alex said, moving himself a little closer to Alexa as if to hide.

"You were right Miles he is pretty shy," Jay said.

"Of course I'm right. Master is always right isn't that correct Jay?" Miles said giving the leash a good hard tug.

"Yes, sir," Jay muttered without trying to resist the force.

" We should try and find some seats together the movie is going to be starting soon," Miles said looking around the room. Most of the people had already begun to settle into their seats again.

Before long the lights in the room were out and the screen was illuminated again.

"I hope you don't mind Alex I made some changes to the final product. Instead of doing the set I just used your tape." Miles whispered to Alex just as his face appeared on the screen. Alex looked over at Miles with wide eyes. He hadn't been expecting that at all! He thought Miles had insisted that it would be part of a series. What had changed his mind? Alex wasn't even all that entertaining or at least he didn't think that he was. Upon hearing the shocking news he's half tempted to run while he still can before the people see the film and notice that it's him.

Alex was slightly more pleased with his performance then he thought he would be. He looked better on film than he'd expected himself to but that doesn't mean he's not entirely embarrassed by it. Somewhere around the time he clothes came all the way off and he had given the shot down the front of his underwear he'd started hiding his face in Miles' shoulder to conceal his red cheeks. It's about the same time that Jay realizes that he, as well as the other boys, have all been cut from the film. All except for Alex who is currently trying to shield his face while Miles has got a comforting arm around his shoulder. Jay sees Miles lean a little closer to Alex, whispering something in the other boy's ear to make him giggle and he's having none of it. He's the one who's there with Miles, not this kid who hardly looks old enough to be out at this hour.

 

To get the attention back on himself Jay starts running his hands up and down Miles' thigh, running his short nails over the black leather of Miles trousers and working his way closer and closer to the other man's groin. "Miles. I want to go play." He whispered to him. " Can we go upstairs yet?" He asked.

"Not now Jay, this is my Movie!" Miles replies in a hushed tone.

"But Miles!"

"I said not now. It will be over in a bit and there are some people that I want to introduce Alex too. Then we'll go and play." Miles said. " Now hush, or you'll be in trouble later and not the good kind either. Jay wants to protest the fact that this sissy little boy in a dress ( Is he a boy? Jay can't really tell. He's certainly not Miles type that's for sure!) is getting the attention that should be his. Being one of Miles current submissives in training he's used to having all of Miles focus being on him. When Miles invites him to come with Shadow Play with him that's what he's come to expect. Miles would never play with another sub when he's at the club with someone already, especially someone who he's gifted with a training collar! They're not in a relationship. There's nothing monogamous about their dynamic, so Jay isn't the type to be jealous for any reason. However, when that collar is on and they take on their roles He expects to have Miles undivided affections at least for the time that was promised to him. Who did this little brat think he was that he could come in here and take that away from him when he's not earned it.

When the film ends Miles seems more than pleased with the outcome. Alex, on the other hand, is praying that the ground will open up and swallow him whole. When the lights return to their normal (although still dim) levels everyone seems to notice him sitting next to Miles. He can feel their eyes burning into him and the feeling is making him anxious. He knew coming here was a bad idea, but now he's already out and has made the commitment to be there. Besides, Miles won't let any of those people bother him, right?

Several people start to approach them to congratulate Miles on another brilliant piece of work. It's obvious that most of them know him since he greets them by name. A few of them address Jay as well but only other people wearing collars from what Alex notices. When he's not being spoken to the other boy stands quietly at Miles side with his hands behind his back. On a couple of occasions, Alex thinks he sees Jay glaring in his direction but he brushes it off as being paranoid.

"Miles, can we go play now? Please." Jay pleads when he's finally had enough. As Miles had been talking to one of their other friends He'd slipped his hand down to Alex's waist pulling the boy a bit closer in a rather protective manner. Jay was having none of that. He's tired of being ignored.

"Jay, you knew tonight was a very important night for me. I invited you because you've been so well behaved lately. Don't make me regret that decisions. Why don't you go ahead and go upstairs and I'll be there in a moment when I'm done here. I want to introduce Alex to our hosts for the evening." Miles says calmly although there's an underlying hint of annoyance in his tone. Jay huffed and headed to the hallway that adjoined the room dissappearing from sight.

"You know you can go do um... whatever it is you do with him. I'll be alright on my own I have Alexa!" Alex said hoping that he wasn't the one stopping Miles and Jay from enjoying their time together.

"Nonsense. Jay isn't the most patient of submissives. That's something he needs to work on." Miles said taking Alex by the hand and guiding him across the room.

"Miles! Good going tonight!" A tall ginger man said clapping a hand on Miles back. "Votes aren't all in yet, but I think it's safe to say that you're going to be taking home another victory. This must be your new star am I right?" The Man asked.

"He is indeed. This is Alex my new muse. Quite a looker isn't he?" Miles smiled at Alex. " Alex this is Josh Homme and his beautiful wife Brody." Miles said smiling at the woman next to Josh. Her hair was black and short. She had an certain androgynous air about her that Alex almost envied a bit.

"Hi," Alex said, he starts to retreat a bit from the pair but Miles Hooks his arm a little tighter around Alex keeping him in place.

"Now now Alexander don't by shy. There's nothing to worry about. Josh and Brody are the owners of Shadow Play they're also the DMs here. If you have any questions or if anyone bothers you then you come and tell them alright?" Miles said.

"DM?" Alex asked.

"Dungeon monitors. " Brody informs Alex.

"Oh, uh that makes sense," Alex said blushing at his lack of knowledge.

"I'm a bit surprised Miles. How come you haven't got a collar on this one yet?" Josh asked.

"He's not a sub, Joshua. He's merely a friend who has started to model for me. As you've seen he's a natural in front of the camera." Miles said with a smile in Alex's direction. Alex likes to be praised but it's all so new to him it makes him a bit uncomfortable.

" Have you been upstairs yet son?" Josh asked.

"N-no I don't think I um... I dunno if I really think that's for me." Alex said. " I'm not really comfortable with the idea of strangers trying to touch me."

"Well, that's good, because we're not comfortable with the idea of strangers touching you either. Entering the dungeon doesn't mean that you have to participate. You're never required to do anything that you don't want to and if anyone touches you without your permission then you just let us know." Josh said.

"Oh, um then I might like to have a look I guess." Alex shrugged, looking around for where Alexa had gone.

"I should probably be getting up there actually. Jay is waiting for me." Miles said. " Let me know if I end up winning will you Josh? I promised this little one something special if we won tonight." Miles said smiling at Alex. " I'll catch up with you all later." He said before heading off.

Alex wanders around for a bit looking for Alexa before she finally bumps into her talking to some friends in the corner. " Hey, movie star! Where did you go?"

"Miles was dragging me around talking to people, but then he went upstairs." Alex shrugged.

" Have you been up there to look around yet?" Alexa asked.

"No, not yet but I'm thinking about it. Can't say I'm not a little curious." Alex said. " Josh said I don't have to do anything that I don't want to so what's the harm of just going to look."

"Oh, good. So you've met Josh and Brody! They're very nice people. A little eccentric, but still absolutely wonderful." Alexa smiled.

"Yeah, they seem pretty cool... I have to ask, what should I expect before you know... going into the dungeon?" Alex asked.

"Everything is pretty out in the open. Unless you choose to use one of the private rooms anyone can really walk past and stop to watch your scene. By taking part in those sorts of activities in a community space it's basically an open invitation for everyone else to see. So it's not like you need to look away. If something peaks your interest it's more then ok to stand quietly nearby and observe. However, make sure you're not too close. If someone is in a scene then you need to give them the proper space. Also, don't talk to anyone who is currently in a scene unless they invite you to do so. Sometimes one of the dom's might address you or ask you something if you're watching. They may also invite you to take part in various ways but it's alright to decline if that's not something you're comfortable with." Alexa said. "You're not really the type to break those sorts of rules anyways, I doubt you'll be able to say much of anything once you see what's going on."

 

"Yeah, you're probably right," Alex said rubbing the back of his neck. "This is all very new to me. I find it a bit strange really, but I think that's because I don't know anything about this world."

"... Don't you ever watch porn?" Alexa asked.

"No, not really." Alex laughed.

"Probably all for the better. It gives people unrealistic expectations of what actual sex is like." Alexa shrugged. " Do you want me to come with you, or would you like to do some exploring on your own?" She asked.

" I think I'd rather stick with you if you don't mind thanks" Alex admitted.

"Not a problem. For tonight consider me your guide to all things kinky!" Alex grabbed Alex's hand pulling him towards the hallway that contained the darkened stairwell. Alex could already hear the moans coming from the top of the stairs as well as what sounded like the impact of perhaps paddles of some sort slapping against skin. He couldn't be sure exactly what the noise was until he got closer and saw it was indeed a man using a paddle on a woman who was currently bent over the side of a couch.

The upstairs was much larger than Alex had expected it to be. After wandering around for a while with Alexa and stopping to watch several different scenes play out they bump into Miles and Jay. Jay is chained to the wall with his hands up over his head and his eyes are covered with a blindfold. There are large red splotches across his exposed stomach and legs. Miles had his shirt off and his pants unzipped. He took a long drag of the cigarette that was pressed between his lips before slowly exhaling as he looked over in Alex's direction. " Finally decided to come and have a look then?" He asked. Alex stayed quiet not knowing if he should respond or not.

"It's alright Alex, he spoke to you first. Even though they're in a scene you're allowed to respond." Alexa told him.

" Um, yeah. I got curious so I wanted to have a look around."Alex blushed looking Miles up and down.

"Have you seen anything that peaked your interest?" Miles asked

"I'm not really sure..." Alex lied, there were a couple of things that he might find himself enjoying if he was in those situations but it would have to be with the right person.

" Everyone has something different that they like," Miles said taking the last inhale his cigarette. "Jay here, for instance." He took the hot end of the cigarette and pressed in into the skin on Jay's torso letting it burn as he ground it out on the flesh. " Is a little pain slut. Aren't you boy?" He asked. When he didn't immediately receive an answer he landed a hard slap across Jay's face. " I said, aren't you. You should know by now boy when I speak to you I expect to be answered.

"Yes."

"Yes, what?

"Yes, sir." Jay practically moaned. Alex found it odd that someone could seem to get so much enjoyment out of something like that. Although he did find it slightly arousing.

"He's a glutton for punishment that's for sure. You'd think after six months he'd at least be able to remember his basic rules. Worthless little pig." Miles said causing Jay to whimper again.

"I think I need some fresh air," Alex said heading back towards the stairwell with Alexa close behind.

"It can be a bit overwhelming can't it," Alexa asked when they both returned back downstairs.

"That looked like it hurt," Alex said.

"It probably did, but anything that Miles is doing with Jay they've already agreed upon. Nothing goes on here that both people involved aren't one hundred percent comfortable with. In Jay's case, he happens to be a masochist. He likes pain, that's what turns him on and Miles knows exactly what to give him to make it a good experience for them both. To be honest, as much of a slut as Miles is he's probably one of the best Doms I've ever met. He's always taken care of his submissives. That's why he usually has more the one, he's got a reputation for doing a great job." Alexa informed Alex.

"So, that's why he doesn't have a boyfriend then? Cause he sleeps around with different subs?" Alex asked.

"Submissives and also his models but the models he doesn't often see more than once. Seems like he's breaking those rules with you, isn't he? I guess he plans to keep you around." Alexa said, walking towards the door with Alex. " Do you smoke?"

"Yeah, I could really use a cigarette right now." Alex sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.

"It didn't scare you did it?" Alexa asked.

"It did, but not for the reason you might expect... I'm a bit appalled by the fact that it turned me on." Alex muttered looking down at his feet as his cheeks reddened.

"There's no shame in it Al. We're all here because we have something that we like that people would consider outside of the norm." Alexa said, handing Alex a cigarette as she lit her own. " I will say, by your tape, it already seems like you have some submissive tendencies."

"Do I?" Alex was a bit taken aback by Alexa's statement.

" Yes, you do. I noticed it when you said Miles instructing you makes you feel safer. That tells me you feel better about putting control into someone else's hands and having them make your choices for you."

"I'm not the most decisive person in the world. I don't like to have to make choices." Alex shrugged. " But, I could see where you could draw that conclusion about me... I have to admit I liked it and the other night when Miles and I were texting he was going to help me get off again, but then I said something stupid and ruined it."

"What did you say?" Alexa asked.

"I would rather not talk about it. All I'll say is he ended our conversation after that." Alex said. They both looked in the direction of the clubs door as they heard it open revealing Miles and Jay. Jay seemed to be in a content, euphoric state which Alex found odd considering what he'd just witnessed. The other boy was practically glued to Miles side as if he needed his support to be able to stand up straight.

"Oh, there you two are. We were looking for you to say goodbye." Miles said smiling at the pair.

"Leaving so soon?" Alexa teased.

" I think it's for the best. I need to get Jay home and in bed. I think he's had enough for tonight. Haven't you darling?" Miles asked as he ran his fingers soothingly over the boy's scalp. Jay merely nodded hugging his arms around Miles midsection and trying to press himself closer. "Yeah, somebody's tired. I think he needs a good shag and to be put to bed. He did well tonight. I'm very proud of him." Miles said kissing the top of Jay's head. The other boy looked up as if begging silently until Miles pressed their lips together.

Alex felt a slight twinge in his heart, it wasn't jealousy. No certainly not. Why should he be jealous of Jay! He did, however, want the satisfaction of that sort of attention. He wanted someone to give him that sort of affection and tell him he'd made them proud. He'd helped Miles win tonight! Shouldn't Miles be proud of him as well? Yet still, he hadn't heard those words fall past the other man's lips in his general direction.

"I'm pretty beat too. Do you mind if we head home?" Alex asked looking over at Alexa hoping she would be able to read his subtle signals of discomfort with the situation

"Alright, yeah. It's getting pretty later we should probably be heading back uptown before the trains start running local for the night." Alexa said taking the hint and parting ways with Miles after a brief hug. He made no move to put his hands on Alex simply giving him a nod and then ushering Jay away with an arm around his waist.

That night Alex laid in bed replaying the events of the night over and over again in his mind. He tossed turned unable to wipe the images from his thoughts and the more and more he thought about it the harder and harder he felt himself getting under the blanket. Eventually to satisfy himself and hopefully get to sleep he rolled over and grabbed his phone sending a brief text to Miles.

Alex: I want you to train me. I want to be like those other boys.

As soon as he'd sent it the storm in his mind seemed to settle. He dozed off not long after. Unfortunately, he fell asleep before seeing Miles reply.

Miles: Meet me at the studio. 4 PM tomorrow. Wear the dress you wore tonight. Don't be late.


	3. Good Vibrations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:Aaaah I'm sorry that this took so long. I know that I promised it a few days ago but I've been procrastinating editing it because it's SO LOOOOOONG! On the bright side half the next chapter is already done since I was working on it while I avoided editing. :D
> 
> Anyways, there will probably be a new chapter of shadow play before there's anymore Aviation because of how I want to handle the ending of Aviation. I want to have it written out to the end before I post the next chapter. The final 3 chapters I'm finishing together and will post a day apart. 
> 
> Soooo I really hope you enjoy this! Let me know what you think My loves! <3

Alex is nervous the entire morning. He's thankfully still got Alexa's dress, saying that he was going to wash it before giving it back. It's wasn't like it needed to be dry cleaned or anything it was only simple cotton. He feels a bit to exposed the way that he wore it last night to be walking around during the daytime. So he adds a couple of pieces to make it more modest at least while he's on the street. He's hoping that Miles wouldn't be too disappointed with him for doing so.

He keeps the sheer tights with nothing under them but adds a pair of simple black knee socks and puts on his black sneakers with them, slipping the heeled boots from the night before into his messenger bag. He puts on his leather jacket over the top and is out the door worried, that he might accidentally be late for his meeting with Miles.

He makes it around the studio and into the building just in time but the elevator seems to be slow coming down and taking him up to the 3rd floor causing the time on the clock to slip from exactly 4 pm to 4:01. Miles is already standing in front of the elevator door waiting for him. "You're late Alexander. I told you not to be or else you would be in trouble... but since there's been no negotiation of your punishments yet I'll allow it to slide this once. Don't think I'll be so lenient with you next time. When I say you are to arrive here at a certain time you are to take my word as law and know that tardiness with not be tolerated." He scolds.

"Y-yes Miles... sorry," Alex said hanging his head.

" I'll let it slide this time," Miles said. " Now, don't get too comfortable. We're leaving. You may leave your things here if you'd like. We won't be gone for too long. " Miles said smiling at Alex.

"Where are we going?" Alex asked.

"You won last night so it's time for you to collect your prize. After all, I'm a man of my word." Miles said. "And take that jacket off. It's a bit of a walk to where we're going and it's much too hot for leather... No, you know what, actually bring your things we won't be coming back this way." Miles decides to change his mind.

"Alright?" Alex asked a little unsurely as he followed Miles out to the street. He hails them a cab quickly and directs them to go to 60th and 2nd Avenue. Alex knew that was somewhere near the park and not too far from where he'd just come from. " Why are we going there?" He asked. " I just spent all that time on the train getting down to the village!"

"Because then I can take you home after. It will be easier that way." Miles said.

"Take me home after... after what exactly? What are you going to do to me?" Alex asked slightly worried.

"Nothing Alex we're just going shopping don't look so frightened. I will never do anything to you that you're not made fully aware of first. We're going to go and get a couple of things and then I'll take you home and we'll have a little chat. I thought since you're so on edge it might put you a little more at ease if we were at your apartment instead of mine." Miles shrugged as it made all the sense in the world but Alex is still feeling confused.

They pull up in front of a blue-grey store front that looks more like an elegant showroom than anything Alex would associate with a sex shop. It's very open and rather than being crowded with awful mannequins in slutty attire and glaring neon signs the windows are open and allow you to see clearly into the store. The sign next to the door is clearly marked with the words ' pleasure chest' " Here we are. The pleasure chest." Miles said helping Alex out of the car. As he does he catches a flash of Alex's undergarments or rather, lack thereof, which makes him smiles.

"this wasn't what I was expecting," Alex confessed.

"What did you think I was going to take you to one of those silly novelty places along 8th avenue. Surely not!" Miles said." If I'm going to get you a present it's going to be something that's quality. Nothing plastic or made of that toxic Jelly." Miles visibly shivered.

"Oh, ok!" Alex said.

"Now, this is the pleasure chest. They have another location down in the village that I was originally going to take you to, but I thought that this might be a better idea. That way you can also get a bit familiar with it if you wanted to come in here on your own. They're very sex positive here. You never need to be afraid to ask the staff any questions you might have." Miles said holding the door open for Alex.

" Miles!" A girl shouted from behind the register, running over to hug him. She was dressed in nearly head to toe pink and her blond hair fluttered behind her as she moved. "You actually came up from the village!"

"Hey Suki, it's good to see you too. Alex this is my friends Suki, she works here at pleasure chest and is also one of the regulars at Shadow Play so you'll probably see her around a bit. Suki this is-"

"Oh, I'm well aware of who this is! Word travels fast, you should know that by now Miles. I heard all about your new muse from Arielle. He's just as cute as she said.... um, he right? Sorry love I should have asked if-"

" No, no he is fine. I use male pronouns."Alex said, giving the bubbly girl a shy smile.

"Alright, I just wanted to double check. You can never be too careful, better to check then to assume right?" Suki said. " So what can I do for you two today?"

"We're just browsing. Since Alex's talents won me last nights festival I told him I'd get him something nice." Miles said. "He's never had a toy of his own before. Besides, he's going to be one of my boys now and you know how I like my subs to have nice things."

" You got lucky, rich daddies always have the best toys." Suki giggled in a mock whisper to Alex.

"Suki stop he's not like that. Alex doesn't care about that sort of thing. If he did do you think I'd have him living with Alexa?" Miles asked without looking in either of their directions as he picked up a crop and smacked it against his hand. "Suki is a gold digger."

"I'm not a gold digger!" The girl huffed. " I'm a sugar baby!"

" I don't see much of a difference. If I didn't what sort of person you were deep down I would probably be distrustful of you." Miles said.

"And if you weren't gay I'd probably be blowing you for your money," Suki said causing them both to laugh. Alex is very confused by what's going on.

"So how did you get into uuuh... doing that?" Alex asked he's a bit curious, not that he would ever consider it himself.

 

"I was struggling a lot. I was trying to put myself through school, I had a dump of an apartment up in queens that I could barely pay to keep the heat on in the winter, and I was trying to keep up two jobs and being a full-time student. One of my friends told me I'd be perfect for it so I gave it a shot. My first daddy introduced me to the kink community so I found a ton of new friends. I came out with no student loans, an apartment not too far from here, and lots of pretty gifts. I only work here a couple days a week because I like it. Not because I need to." Suki explained.

"I'd have helped you with your tuition if you'd asked me to," Miles said.

"Gee thanks, dad, but I don't need your handouts. At least this way I feel like I've earned the money rather than getting it from the fairy god gay." Suki rolled her eyes.

"I think you have a skewed definition of what it means to work but that's alright." Miles shrugged, he does so love to tease Suki. Alex, on the other hand, stayed quiet. Was that what the room was? Was it a hand out from Miles? Was it selfish to have accepted it? He didn't say anything he just followed Miles as he walked around the length of the showroom. " See anything that catches your eye?"

"I dunno..." Alex said looking down at his feet.

"Is something wrong Alex?" Miles asked.

"I really shouldn't be letting you give me things..." Alex muttered.

"Oh c'mon is this because of what Suki and I were just talking about?" Miles asked. "Alex this is a reward that you've earned. We had an agreement and you came through on your end of the deal. You did everything I asked you to do for me and now I get to do what I said I would for you. Understood?" When explained like that Alex did feel a little better about it so he nodded.

 

"Yeah, I understand."

"Good, now I'd like you to talk to me about what it is you're thinking you'd like so we can find you the right toy," Miles said.

" I.. uh..." Alex hadn't really thought about it much although he had some idea, but just the idea of it made him blush.

"Now now Alex, if you can't talk about it like a mature adult then you're not ready to own it, love."

"I know I want a vibrator that's for sure..." Alex said. "But I'd like something that looks a bit on the realistic side like you know... an actual penis so I can get myself ready for the real thing. I like the idea of a plug but I don't think that I want one because I want something I could actually fuck myself with."

"There, that wasn't so hard was it?" Miles asked.

"No, I guess not," Alex said although he's still blushing. What about something like this? Alex asked picking up a realistic looking dildo that had a vibrator remote attached to it. It looked to be the same size and what Miles probably was, or what Alex assumed he was thanks to the picture that he'd sent.

"Easy there size queen how about you learn to walk before you run?" Miles suggested taking the toy from Alex and putting it back down. " What about something like this?" he asked picking up something a sleek black silicone vibrator " The base is nice and wide. It's just about the size that you should be starting with and see how it curves here at the tip. That's meant to press right against your prostate and give it a good rub."

Alex took the vibrator from miles looking it over. " Yeah, I like this actually." He said.

"Alright, then go ask Suki to get you one from the stock room. I bet she's even got it in other colors." Miles said winking at Alex. Alex ran off to go ask while Miles kept browsing. He picked up a new cane since he had broken his previous one and was looking at collars when Alex returned.

"She had it in purple!" Alex exclaimed with excitement.

 

"Is purple your favorite color love?" Miles asked.

"Purple or blue." Alex nodded as Miles picked up a collar to examine. It looked very thick and had a metal ring on the front. " That looks uncomfortable. If I was going to get one I'd pick that one." He pointed to a burgundy red colored leather and velvet collar with a simple, smaller ring on the front.

"It's not supposed to be comfortable it's a posture collar," Miles said. "Suki!" He called out to her. "Do you have any of these with a double clasp on the back?"

"Coming on a little strong with this one aren't you?"Suki asked.

"It's not for him, it's for Owen," Miles said.

"I thought you weren't seeing Owen anymore." Suki raised an eyebrow. " You said you were just down to Jay."

 

" No Jeff still comes around from time to time as well. Owen a bit of a mess I'll admit, but I still care for him and I need him to help me with the intermediate electron class I'm teaching at Shadow Play next weekend. Jay doesn't like being shocked." Miles said

"Funny, he likes all the pain, but a little electricity and he screams like a bitch." Suki rolled her eyes. She'd witnessed the first time Miles had tried it with him.

"That went on his hard limit list pretty faster after that," Miles said. " So Owen will help me teach the class even though he's been a bit of a disappointment lately."

"Electro?" Alex asked.

"Yes, electricity play," Miles said. " You see that wand over there in the corner? Go turn it on and put it on your arm." He told Alex pointing to a small section in the corner. Once he was out of earshot with his back turned Miles turned back to Suki as he picked up the velvet collar. "I need you to put this on hold for me. I'll come back for it in a couple of days."

It doesn't take long for them to get back to Alex and Alexa's apartment once they leave pleasure chest. When they arrive they find no one home. "Is Alexa working tonight?" Miles asked.

"Yeah, she said she had some stuff to do because she took off early last night to go to Shadow Play... that and I think she has a night shoot," Alex said as he took off his sneakers and jacket.

"Well, then that works to our advantage," Miles smirked.

 

"So how does this all work, are you actually going to touch me now or..." Alex trailed off.

"Maybe I will maybe I won't we'll see how the evening progresses. Have you eaten today?" Miles asked.

"What? What does that have to do with being a sub!" Alex asked.

"It was a yes or no question Alex have you eaten today?" Miles asked again.

"No, I was too nervous early. I thought it would make me sick." Alex admitted while Miles was going through the fridge.

"Well, then it looks like I'll be making dinner then." He said, " You like chicken soup?"

"Yeah!" Alex said. " I'll eat most anything."

"Good. It's healthy for you and we'll have a little time to play while it cooks." Miles smirked going to pull out a pan and some vegetables. Alex was about to ask how he knew where everything was before remembering that Miles used to live here.

Alex jumped up on the counter top next to Miles to watch him while he chopped vegetables. He sat in a way so the bottom of the dress rode up just a little, making Miles raise an eyebrow. " So," Miles finally speaks. " Normally when I take on a new sub they're more experienced than you are and have at least some clues about what their likes, as well as their limitations, are. I know you don't necessarily have that knowledge but I would like to know if you've done any research." Miles said.

"No... not really past what I saw last night," Alex admitted. " And maybe a few things that I've seen in porn here and there, but I don't watch much of that either."

"That's what I expected. So our negotiation will be a little different at least at first. Now right from the start is there anything that you know for certain you would at no time be willing to ever try?" Miles asked.

"I um... I didn't like what you did to Jay with the cigarette."Alex said. "But what if it turns out that I like pain! I don't really want to count out anything for sure until I know more."

"Right, so at this point then you have no hard limits. Don't worry it's not like I'm going to jump right in and be putting out lit cigarettes on you anytime in the near future. I've known jay for three years and have had him as a sub for over six months. I know all the details of his likes and dislikes so I can treat him very differently than I would you and I treat both you and Jay differently then I would Owen. All submissives are different and a good dom will tell you what works for one might not always work for the other."

"So what do you think will work for me then?" Alex asked.

"patience and clarity," Miles said. "Things might change some down the line as both you and I come to understand your sexuality. For now, everything will be discussed on a scene to scene basis. We're going to start out small. Things like handcuffs, blindfolds, light spanking, a bit of rope maybe. Nothing too intense and we'll build up from there at your pace. We will discuss what will happen before a scene each time so you know the things that are coming that might be new to you. Like the next time I see you, I might decide I want to put a pair of cuffs on you and I'm going to spank you with my open palm. That's before we start I'll show you the cuffs and explain to you what is going to happen. Do you understand?" Miles asked.

"Yeah, that makes sense." Alex nodded.

"Now, I generally use the stop light system with all of my subs. Green meaning to continue, everything is great. You can use yellow if you want to stop for a moment to discuss something further and then continue or if I'm getting too close to something that makes you uncomfortable. Red is the one you need to remember most. That will be your safe word. That means everything stops immediately and we're done for the night."

"Ok... Green, yellow, red." Alex repeated, " That's easy."

"Now, although we're in a phase of experimenting with your sexuality and opening up new doors for you there are still some rules that I'll be putting in place with you."

"Rules? Like what?" Alex asked.

" First of all, you will check in with me every day. At least once a day just to let me know how you're doing. You will Also give me your work schedule so I know what times and I can expect not to hear from you."

"Easy!" Alex said. Now he's got an excuse to make sure that he talks to Miles every day.

"Two I'm putting you on a strict diet. You're very thin Alex and it concerns me. It looks like you're not getting the nutrients you need. I want you eating healthy and three times a day the way you should be for you to achieve a healthy weight." Miles said.

"I can do that..." Alex said it's not that he's skinny on purpose he's just poor and high energy, but now living with Alexa he doesn't have to worry about buying groceries.

"Three, each week I want to you go and explore something new in the city." Miles said " You haven't seen much yet and before you say you don't the money to do something like that, that's absolute bullshit. There are so many things to do in the city that don't cost a dime. Each new place you go I want to you send me a cute picture of you there."

" I get lost so easily though what if- "

"Alex it's a grid. The streets have numbers and you're never too far from a train with a map even if your phone dies you can still easily find out where you are. The more you get comfortable moving around the better you'll get at navigating the city." Miles said. He doesn't want to hear any excuses.

"Alright... but what does this have to do with being a submissive?" Alex asked.

"It's my job as a dom to challenge you not only sexually but to be a better person as well. I want you to lead a healthy and fulfilling life so I will push you to do so." Miles explained.

" Oh, I kind of like that." Alex smiled.

"It all comes with the territory of being a sub. Now we'll get into the specific rules." Miles said sliding some of the vegetables into the pot. "first of all, another note about pictures. I can ask you for them anytime I like and you are obligated to comply no matter where you are or who you're with. Since I'll have your work schedule I would never ask during your work day because I don't want to you to get in trouble."

"That's easy. I take a million selfies a day anyways." Alex said he's much vainer than people give the shy boy credit for.

"When we are in a scene you will address me as either Sir, Master, or Mr. Kane. You can use daddy if you want but I prefer sir."

"Yes, sir."

" Next, you are no longer allowed to masturbate without my permission. You will ask first and will not do so until you are given an answer." Miles said firmly.

"Yes, sir."

"Now the last thing is punishments. This will be for things like today where I specifically told you not to be late and you were anyways. I found that very disrespectful Alex and normally it would lead to you being punished." Miles said making Alex blush. " There are only two punishments I'm going to use with you right now, alright? Depending on your offense and how my mood is it will be either open handed spanking or standing, possibly kneeling in the corner for an amount of time that I decide. This will change over time, but for now, I think those two will be more than effective."

"That doesn't sound too bad." Alex nodded.

"Alright, so those are the rules. Do you agree with them?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir!" Alex said happily.

"Good, very good," Miles said. "For tonight I've decided what we'll be doing. What I'll have you do in a moment is you'll strip down for me so I can look you over. Then you're going to go shower and clean yourself up real good. When you're finished I'm going to teach you how to use your new toy on yourself does that sound good? Miles asked.

"YES SIR!" Alex said excitedly he can't wait!

"Alright then Alex, hop down from there. Get your clothes off." Miles said. Alex was for some reason shocked by this command. He knew that it was coming. Miles had just told him that it was but for he didn't expect now to mean right this second, right here under the bright kitchen lights.Alex felt it would be somewhat more revealing than it had been at Miles studio when the afternoon light and shady spaces had given him some protection. Under the bright florescent there would be no way for him to hide at all.

"R-right now?" Alex asked.

"Yes, obviously. I told you to do something and now I expect that you do it and you better get a move on. I don't like to be kept waiting." Miles said. A more experienced submissive would have gotten a slap with the wooden spoon in his hand if they had questioned him, but Alex is young and Miles can tell he's unsure so, for now, he wouldn't even consider doing such things although he's going to make his expectations abundantly clear to him.

Alex thought for a second about how exactly he wanted to do this before starting out. What had been so appealing about him was his playfulness right? Truth be told under the bright lights with Miles watching him expectantly felt a little different. The energy wasn't the same as it had been with the other man looking at him through a camera lens. At that point, Alex had been in control and now he'd given that up to Miles. It gave him a warm tingling feeling in his stomach, an illusion of safety but still left him feeling much more anxious than playful. Still, he tried anyways. Slowly sliding one of his socks down his calf and dropping it to the floor. It was followed shortly by the other before he jumped down to the floor from his previous place perched on the cold tile counter top. The next thing to go was the dress as he undid the clasp at the back letting it fall away.

"Nothing under those tights I see. Not the first time little glimpse you've given me today." Miles winked.

 

"You knew?" Alex asked.

"Of course I did. What were you not showing me intentionally? And here I thought you might actually be toying with me, Alexander. You are absolutely clueless aren't you?" Miles asked with a smirk playing on his lips.

"I didn't know I was um... You know. Alexa suggested it last night. She said it was something you might like." Alex confessed, his cheeks becoming warm and red.

 

"Yeah, the little devil is right," Miles smirked. " I very much like what I see in front of me, but they're going to have to come off too I'm afraid," Miles said, turning back to the stove to stir the soup. "Did you go to the club like that last night with the intention of enticing me?" Miles asked.

"M-maybe..." Alex admitted.

"Oh, Alex. You can't be both my date and my muse on the same night. It sends the wrong message. It wouldn't be good for my reputation." Miles said. " Besides it wouldn't be fair to Jay. I've put an awful lot of work into him and he's been doing so well."

" Right...How silly of me." Alex said as he tried to find a graceful way to remove the tights, this only caused overthinking which ended up with him on landing on his back on the floor.

"Are you alright?" Miles asked offering Alex a hand up once he'd shed the sheer stockings.

"Yeah, I was trying to take them off all Sexy like but it didn't work and I just fell instead." Alex blushed

"You don't need to try so hard Alex. There's a natural fluidity to the way you move when you don't over think. Just let yourself relax alright. How are you feeling?" Miles asked pulling the smaller boy to his feet, not letting go once he was standing again.

"Nervous, vulnerable...I feel very exposed right now if I'm honest..."Alex said.

"What reason do you have to feel so exposed Alex. I've already seen your body before. You can trust that I'm not going to harm you. Is there something you're trying to hide from me?" Miles asked.

" I have scars..." Alex muttered. " You'll see them in this light."

"You think I didn't notice them already? The make up you put on them the other day didn't do much to cover them up, Alex." Miles said.

"S-so you're not going to ask about them?" Alex asked.

"No, did you want to tell me about them?"

"No."

"Alright then, we won't talk about them." Miles said, letting go of Alex. "Stand there. Middle of the floor, legs apart." He instructed. Alex nodded and did as he was told. Miles then walked slowly around him looking over Alex's body. "Relax, Alex." He said putting his hands on Alex's shoulders and rubbing his hands up and down his arms. It was the first real bit of contact Alex had gotten from Miles. Just the feel of skin on skin was enough to make him shiver. He tensed at first but Alex started to loosen up as Miles rubbed his hands repeatedly up and down his arms. " You're lovely," Miles muttered before taking his hands off the boy. " Now, off to the shower. Let the hot water relax you. Take your time make sure you're nice and clean and come back when you are. I'll be waiting for you."

" Yes sir," Alex says walking off in the direction of the bathroom.

"Oh, and Alex, leave the door open," Miles added.

While Alex was in the shower Miles pulled Alex's new toy out of the box. In addition to the vibrator, Miles had picked out a plug for Alex as well in the hopes that he would start using it on his own. He pulled them both on the coffee table before starting to flip through channels on the TV. Alex finishes some time later and comes back into the living room to find Miles looking rather at home. He's taken aback for a moment before remembering that at one time this WAS Miles home and had been for much longer than it had been his own. "What would you like me to do now sir?" Alex asked, crossing the room to stand between Miles and the TV.

"Towel off. Drop it." Miles said nodding to the towel that Alex currently had around his waist. "From now on, once I tell you to take your clothes off I expect for you to stay like that for the remainder of our time together unless I tell you otherwise." Miles said looking Alex over once again.

"Ok... So what do I do now?" Alex asked rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. He took his lip between his front teeth worrying it raw and causing it to redden as he bit down.

"I need you to Relax Alex. You look like an absolute wreck." Miles sighed as he reached for the remote and turned the television off. " Here come sit." He instructed, patting the space next to him. Alex nodded taking the spot next to Miles on the couch. Miles' arm went around his shoulder quickly, pulling the naked and still slightly damp boy to his side. " Do you want to tell me what it is that's making you so anxious love?" He asked.

"I'm just... worried that it will hurt I guess," Alex admitted, fidgeting with his hands, unsure what to do with them.

"Did it hurt the first time you used your fingers?" Miles asked.

"A little... but it was pretty easy to get used to," Alex said, tucking his head down to rest on Miles' chest and leaning in more. He liked the feeling of closeness and the comforting way the older man ran his hands up and down his shoulder in small circular motions.

"This won't be much different than that. It might sting a little at first but the reward will be worth it." Miles assured him.

"I know, and I'm really excited. I just always get nervous when I'm trying new things. I'm not really the adventurous type." Alex sighed.

"So you keep saying, but I don't see that at all. On the contrary, I think you're a very brave boy Alexander." Miles said.

"I'm not..."

"Sure you are. You've dealt with more than anyone your age should, you moved across the ocean to a completely foreign place, you go to night clubs alone, and after watching me put out a cigarette on someone's skin last night you texted me and said that you wanted to be one of my boys anyways." Miles pointed out.

"I guess I don't it like that. Those are things that I just... you know, I didn't really think about them I just did it." Alex shrugged.

"Because when you let go of your reservations you're much more courageous than you give yourself credit for. I want to help bring that out of you. If you're going to be one of my subs then I'm not only invested in helping you to discover your sexuality but your personal growth as well. I'm sure you're going to make me a very proud master aren't you?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir," Alex said with a bit more conviction in his voice than had been there earlier.

"Wonderful. Are you ready to get started?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir," Alex said again as Miles pulled away from their rather comfortable position.

"Good, I think here on the couch will be fine to start with. But you must remember not to make a mess. I don't want a single drop of cum on the upholstery. Do I make myself clear?" Alex nodded his really which Miles wouldn't normally let slide, but he knows if he disciplines Alex right now he'll probably go right back to being a nervous wreck. "Alright, so here's how this will go. I'm going to get you warmed up with my fingers a bit before we try to use the toy. With the vibrator, I don't think it's going to take you long to orgasm the first time. You have my permission to go ahead and cum when you feel like you're ready too. That should get you a little more relaxed."

"Ok." Alex nodded.

"But you're young and eager, so it should be no problem for you to get hard twice in a short space of time. So I expect you to climax twice in this session and the second time you will not do so until I have given you permission. You will ask and if I am suitably pleased with the effort that you've put in then you'll be given permission. If not then I expect you to hold yourself back and if not then there will be consequences. I don't particularly think you're going to want a red bum tonight since you'll probably already be feeling a little soreness, so I suggest you really do give it your all. Do you understand Alex?"

"Yes, sir. I can do that. It shouldn't be too hard." Alex is eager to please and just listening to Miles as he explains what's about to happen has already gotten him half hard.

"What a good boy," Miles said ruffling Alex's hair as he stood up from the couch. "Lay down on your stomach, knees under you, bum in the air as high as you can get it." Alex scrambled to get into the position he was instructed to be in causing Miles to laugh. Alex gave him a pathetic look in return.

"Why are you laughing have I done something wrong?" Alex asked.

"No, no you're just clumsy when you try to move so quickly. You look a bit like a foal trying to get to its feet for the first time. It's actually quite cute, but I want you to remember to slow down, breathe. Remember what we talked about at the studio. Have a fluidity and purpose to your movements." Miles said as he looked over Alex's new position.

Alex has never felt so vulnerable. When the camera was on him he had the ability to cheat away from the lens or use the lighting to keep from revealing too much. Like this, he was completely exposed to Miles putting the most intimate parts of his body on full display for him.

"You have such a perky little bum. I can't wait till you give me an excuse to slap it raw and red." Miles said giving Alex a light tap just to accentuate the statement. Alex yelped because he hadn't been expecting the sensation but didn't mind at all. Behind him, he heard the cap that he assumed belong to the lube bottle snap open. Moments later he felt the cold liquid, as well as one of Miles' fingers, press against his entrance. " Just relax Alex. I need you to take deep breaths and relax your muscles."

"yes, sir," Alex muttered as he tried to do as Miles instructed. This was the first time that he had ever felt someone else's hands on him in such an intimate way. Sure, he'd fooled around with Nick, but anything Anal was off the table between the two of them. Alex had always thought that it would end up leading to sex if he let Nick touch him like that. Not only would sex change their dynamic, but Alex didn't want to have sex with Nick. Which led him to question did he want to have sex with Miles? He wanted to give himself to someone he was in love with and given Miles reputation, it was easy to say that Miles was not the sort who would ever love him. Then why was he letting Miles do these things to him?

"Alex, you're getting into your head again. I told you to relax." Miles said rubbing his hand that wasn't covered in lube up and down Alex's spine. It was as if all the tension was sucked from Alex's body by the simple motion. Why did need to justify to himself why he was letting Miles do these things. The simple answer was because he wanted him to. That was all the reason he needed. " Very good there you go. You're doing wonderfully." Miles praised him, only relaxing Alex further which allowed him to slip a finger inside.

Alex had become accustomed to the feeling of his own fingers, but Miles' were something entirely different. They were thinner, longer, and didn't seem to scratch him the way his own did. Maybe that part was owing to how well manicured Miles fingernails were. It also seemed that his fingers could reach much deeper than Alex's own could.

Miles started working the one finger in and out of Alex, rubbing around inside him, seeing what noises he could produce from the boy as he pressed on all the most sensitive areas inside of him. He couldn't help but noticed even as his muscles were showing less and less resistance Alex was still incredibly tight. "Such a tight hole, am I the first one to get to play with it?" Miles asked. He's genuinely curious.

"Y-yes Miles." Alex Moaned as Miles started to press a second finger into him. So he was the first then? He'd like to be the first to be inside him. Something about the idea of having that complete control over a boy like Alex, someone so clean and pure, had him practically salivating. He wanted to taste every part of that innocent body that riggled below him as he fucked his fingers in and out of him. Though the fantasy is enticing, Alex is a virgin. It's his choice who he wants to give himself to. Miles, though his morals occasionally questionable, is not a monster! He would never do anything to sway Alex's decision. Until then he would take pride in sharing these new experiences with Alex because few things are more enticing than opening the eyes of someone young and eager to a new world of sensation.

"Do you think you're ready to try with the toy?" Miles asked as he scissored his fingers open repeatedly inside of Alex to spread him open.

"No, sir... " Alex admitted. He's still nervous and he's afraid the size of the toy will still be a bit much for him to handle. In retrospect, he's glad that Miles had talked him out of the larger one and into something a bit more middle ranged in size.

"Is it because you're afraid Alex?" Miles asked as he pulled his fingers out of Alex.

"A little..." Alex said, whining at the loss.

"I think you're plenty loose enough, that it would slide right in with to much trouble," Miles said rubbing his hands over Alex's backside and shoulders. Occasionally he would rub a couple of fingers over Alex's puckered entrance to tease him without pressing his fingers back in. Each time he did it would earn him a gasp from the smaller boy.

Alex was already achingly hard against from Miles fingering him. Usually, if he touched himself in such a way it would be enough to make him finish fairly quick. He wanted to wait though, he couldn't get off without at least trying his toy first. That would disappoint not only Miles but himself as well. "Ok, I think I'm ready," Alex said.

" You think?" Miles asked. "Thinking you are isn't good enough Alex. I want you to know you are. Say it with conviction. Be confident in your words."

"I'm ready," Alex said again.

"You're ready what?" Miles asked.

 

"I'm ready sir," Alex said.

"Very good Alex. Now you're getting the hang of it," Miles said deciding to play a little further into this. " And what is it exactly that you're ready for?" Alex decided to be a bit playful with his response.

 

"For Mr.Kane to teach me to use the new present he bought me," Alex replied. He knew Miles couldn't see it but there was a wide smirk on his lips. Miles is thoroughly enjoying this. He starting to see a bit of Alex's playfulness reemerging which means he's getting more comfortable with the situation.

 

"Well, if it's a lesson my little boy needs then I'll be happy to teach him," Miles said reaching for the vibrator and putting some lube on it. "It might hurt a little at first. There's going to be a little bit of a stretch." Miles said pressing the vibrator against Alex's entrance. Alex pressed his face down in the couch to suppress a choked cry as Miles pushed the toy into him. " Are you alright?" Miles asked without stopping his movement, pressing forward until about half of vibrator was inside.

"Just feels really full," Alex said.

"You still have a bit to go, it's only about half in," Miles said rubbing a hand through Alex's hair, he could already feel sweat starting to form on the back of the boy's neck. " I'm going to turn it on low to let you get used to the feeling of the vibration before we go any further ok?"

"Yes, sir." Alex nodded. He was eager to know what it was going to feel like. Once Miles turned it on Alex noticed that the low setting didn't seem to feel very low to him. He gasped sinking his fingers deeper into the material of the couch. " Oh fuck. Oh my god."

"It's fun to try new things isn't it Alex. I bet it feels very nice doesn't it," Miles said pushing the vibrator in the rest of the way. " There see how easy that was, it's all in now." Alex didn't seem to have words to communicate. Instead, he just squirmed unsure whether to press back against the toy in Miles hand of lean down to rub the tip of his erection against the couch. Turns out the answer was neither because before he could act on either idea Miles turned the vibrator up a setting making him cum almost instantly all over the leather couch.

"Oh, Alex what did I tell you about making a mess on the furniture," Miles said, pulling the vibrator out and turning it off.

"I'm sorry, it just.... I didn't know I was gonna... um... I'm in trouble aren't I?" Alex asked.

 

"No, not this time. I know that was probably a little overwhelming so you won't be punished. However, I do expect you to clean it up." Miles said.

"Yes, sir," Alex said reaching for the towel that had been tossed onto the floor. Miles grabbed his hand quickly to stop him.

"No, no Alexander," Miles said. He leaned closer running his fingers through the sticky white fluid on the couch. He brought his fingers up to Alex's mouth. " Open," he said. Alex looked reluctant at first but soon enough opened his mouth to Miles' fingers sucking on them a bit. " That's it, good boy. Make sure you get every bit, we don't want to be wasteful now do we?" Alex didn't reply he simply closed his eyes, moaning with Miles' fingers still in his mouth, doing his best to arouse his dom by working his tongue against the digits until Miles pulled them away. " Very good Alex. Very good."

"Thank you sir," Alex said making Miles smile. For being new to this the boy already has good manners.

"Alright, come sit down for a minute." He wants to give Alex a moment to compose himself before they go again and he wants to get a handle on how the boy is feeling. "After having tried it, what do you think?" Miles asked.

"I loved it! It was a little weird at first but everything felt so good!" Alex said sitting on the couch next to Miles and facing him.

"Any pain?"

"No, I mean a little burning from the stretch but other than that not really. Knees are a little burned too but it's sort of a pleasant feeling." Alex said.

 

"This time because it was a new feeling you had a lot more control then I'd generally allow you to have. We're probably going to do things like this for a while where for a little bit I'll allow you some degree of decisions over the new sensation. This is so you're not being pushed into anything you're not ready for."

"Thank you," Alex said.

"But, once I see that you're comfortable with something I've introduced to you I'll be taking that control away. That's what I'm going to do now. You'll no longer have control over what is done with the vibrator while it's in my hand. I'll use the settings as much or as little as I like. If you would like something you may ask for it but there's no guarantee I will give it to you. You've now seen what the lowest and highest settings are on the toy so everything else will be between them. Can you handle that?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir." Alex nodded.

"Good. Remember if you start to get uncomfortable at any time you have a safe word that is intended to be used." Miles said. " What is your safe word, Alex?"

"Red sir," Alex said.

"Very good," Miles said looking around. " I think I'll have you on your back this time. On the floor please." Miles pointed to the spot where he wanted him. Alex took his tie moving into position this time, remembering what Miles had said before. " legs up. I want them as far back as you can go and hold them there. Make sure your hole is on display for me like before. You looked so lovely." Miles said he could see Alex was already hardening from the instructions.

"Like this sir?" Alex asked.

"Yes, very good," Miles said, reaching to give Alex's erection a couple of quick strokes before letting go and grabbing the lube again. The lube bottle was smooth and phallic in nature. A more experienced sub Miles would be tamped to ram the bottle into them but of course, Alex wasn't one of his other subs. He does look forward to the day Alex will be comfortable with him disclosing these fantasies to him. Instead, he lubed up the vibrator and pressed it into Alex's again turning it up to the second setting. He started thrusting it almost immediately starting slowly at first but slowly building speed. Every time his pace changed so did the rate of the vibrations.

Alex was in pure ecstasy. If this is what having Miles do as he pleased felt like then he was more than happy to just let him have his way." Oh fuck." he moaned enjoying the was the pace and patterns of vibrations changed. He's also enjoying the feeling of getting penetrated by more than just fingers. If he's being given this much pleasure from Miles just thrusting a toy into him he can't fathom what real sex will be like. With every time Miles pressed back in the curved head of the toy rubbed itself right against Alex's prostate causing him to moan and groan with every repeat of the action.

Miles smirked to himself, watching Alex who's eyes were screwed shut as he enjoyed the sensations. He could see the way the precum was starting to pool against Alex's stomach. The site was enticing and exciting. Mile's member was straining against the inside of his jeans and had been for some time. Now that this wasn't a business matter and Alex was one of his boys it was up to his own discretion if he wanted to expose himself to Alex. He decided to reach with his free hand to undo his trousers and slip himself out from under his boxers so he could rub his shaft with his free hand. He probably wouldn't last long but he wanted to push Alex so that meant he had to push himself.

"It's so good. Oh god." Alex whimpered as Miles turned up the speed on the vibrator again but slowed his thrusts. "Please, sir I can't take anymore."

" You can and you will Alexander," Miles said sternly.

"I can't." Alex cried shaking his head violently as Miles continues his assault.

"Yes, you can. Open your eyes look at me." Miles said waiting for Alex to open his eyes.

"I'll cum if I do," Alex complained.

"No, you won't come until I tell you to. Now, do as I say, Alex." Miles said more sternly. "Or talking back is going to get you in big trouble." Alex tried his hardest to open his eyes. Miles found himself soon staring into the chocolate brown orbs watching the different expressions on Alex's face as he tilted to the toy to slightly different angles. Other then his loud moans Alex doesn't say a word until a few minutes later.

"Sir can I please cum? Please, I can't hold it anymore." He pleaded. Looks like begging comes naturally to this one.

"Good little boys will hold it just as long as they're asked to without complaint." Miles teased, although he's getting close as well.

"I'm trying to be a good boy sir but it hurts." Alex cried. Miles could tell he was really trying. It was evident in the tears at the corners of both Alex's eyes.

"Are you in pain baby boy? Do you think the release will make it all go away for you?" Miles figures he can play with him just a little longer. Give Alex a chance to feel what it's really like to be dominated before he lets him finish. Depending on how he reacts will be a good gauge of whether or not Alex would really be a good candidate for training. So far he's doing exceptionally especially considering he has nowhere near the stamina of someone more experienced.

"Yes, sir. It hurts so bad." Alex was practically shaking again like the first time that Miles had gotten him off. He could tell that the younger boy was trying his absolute hardest but couldn't contain himself much longer. " Please, please please!" Alex begged over and over again.

"Alright, you can go ahead and cum for me, Alex," Miles said turning up the vibrator one final time and letting it rest right against Alex's prostate. Alex screamed, loud enough to wake the neighbors if they had any on that floor, as he came all over his stomach, some of it reaching up as far as his neck. Alex let go of his legs laying splayed out on the carpet as Miles pulled the vibrator out. Miles knelt over Alex, speeding up the movements of his hand for a couple more strokes before he too Came on Alex's chest.

"Did I do good?" Alex asked.

"Wonderfully," Miles said smiling at Alex as he got to his feet, zipping his trousers. " You did everything I asked of you," he added, picking Alex up off the floor. Alex hadn't been expecting that but didn't protest, looping his arms around Miles' neck. Miles dropped Alex down gently on his bed, flashing him a quick smile. " Wait here." He said. Alex was left slightly confused and still sticky sitting on the edge of his bed until Miles came back from the bathroom with a damp cloth and some lotion.

"That tickles."Alex giggled as Miles wiped the mess from his stomach. " Feels nice, though." Miles just smirked.

"What you thought I'd just leave you all sticky like that? Maybe another day I will." Miles said running a hand through Alex's hair. " Let me have a look at your back, it's probably rug burned." Alex turned around, letting Miles rub lotion over the red marks the carpet had left all over his back. Alex shivered a bit as the lotion felt cool against his skin. When He'd finished with the lotion Miles set it aside and walked over to Alex's dresser opening the drawers. Alex didn't seem to have much, but Miles pulled him out a t-shirt and sweatpants putting them on the bed next to Alex. " Get dressed. Dinner should be done." He said turning to leave the room.

"Miles... why are you being so nice to me?" Alex asked. Miles sighed walking back to Alex and kneeling down in front of him, pressing his forehead against Alex's.

"Because you did magnificently, and I'm very proud of you Alexander," Miles said pulling back a little and grabbing Alex's hands. "And it's my job to make sure that when we're done that you're taken care of. I wouldn't be a very good dom if I didn't care for your well being after I've used you in the ways I see fit."

"So this is a normal thing then?" Alex asked. Come to think of it, he had noticed a change in Miles from when he'd been using Jay as a human ashtray to when he'd seen the two of them outside the club.

"It's called aftercare and it's a very important part of this process," Miles said, squeezing Alex's hands.

"Oh ok," Alex said getting up and stretching out a bit as he put his pants on. " I'm hungry." He said walking towards the kitchen "Smells so good." He groaned.

"Go sit at the table I'll get you some," Miles said smiling at Alex. Alex is thoroughly enjoying all the attention he's getting. It's especially nice coming from Miles who is already kind to him as is.

" I don't know how this all works but I thought you're supposed to make someone dinner and then do sexy things to them. Not the other way around." Alex giggled.

"Very funny Alex." Miles rolled his eyes but handed the boy a bowl and sat down next to him. "Alexa will be happy when she gets home and see this in the fridge. Sometimes I think that she only ever kept me around for my cooking." he joked.

"I can see why!" Alex said.

"So, after our first session how do you feel?" Miles asked. " Did you have fun."

"I like it best the second time around when you had full control," Alex admitted. "Seriously the best orgasm of my life. I feel so good and like... I dunno it's like all the tension is gone. That and I'm absolutely exhausted." As tired as he was Alex couldn't stop smiling. Not only had he enjoyed every bit of that but he wanted more. "... I like it when you tell me I'm doing things right. It's not something I hear a whole lot. Everything that I'm doing is always wrong to someone or another. Today sort of made me feel like less of a fuck up." He added fidgeting with his spoon.

"You get praise for trying your best, but don't think it doesn't go the opposite way as well," Miles said. " I won't always be so lenient with you once you start to progress my expectations for you will be the same as they would for any other sub."

"I can take more," Alex said. " I want more! Miles, you make me feel safe and wanted. It's not something I'm used to. I do have one question, though."

"Ask away."

"Um... going on from here... is sex a requirement. Like I mean that was sort of sex but you know what I mean." Alex said blushing and staring down into his half-emptied soup bowl.

"No Alex, intercourse will never be a requirement and it's not something that even needs to be brought up. That said you are a sexually active young man and I think you're going to come to want it soon. When you decided the time is right and with who is up to you as it should be. I will admit though I'm enticed but the idea of being your first in many things."

"Tonight was sure a first," Alex said biting his lip. Did Miles just say he wanted to have sex with him? Still, Alex knows that he's not quite there yet. "As far as sex though I'm not ready." He shook his head.

"That's fine. No one is asking you to be. We won't even bring it up unless you want to." Miles said. Of course, he's not going to pressure Alex.

"Thanks, Miles." Alex yawned, resting his elbows on the table.

"Tired Al?"

"Mhm." Alex nodded.

"Alright, let's get you to bed then. C'mon, go brush your teeth." Miles said. Alex laughed.

"What are you, my mother?"

 

"No, but you can call me daddy if you like." Miles teased.

"Oh, yes daddy. I'll do whatever you says." Alex giggled getting up from his chair and going to sit in Miles lap. " Just don't spank me again."

"I haven't even spanked you the first time yet. Who knows you might just enjoy it." Miles said causing Alex to smile. There it was, that playfulness showing it's face again now that Alex was relaxed.

"Why would I like it. Isn't it supposed to be my punishment?" Alex asked.

" You're right it is, but punishment isn't always a bad thing. Who knows you might turn out to be one of those silly little brats who craves it." Miles said digging his fingers into Alex's side to tickle him.

"No! NO Miles stop please!" Alex laughed trying to pull away, but with every tug in the opposite direction Miles, arms went tighter around him. " I think I like this part of it too..." Alex said once he'd stopped laughing.

"what the tickling or the aftercare?" Miles asked.

"It's nice to feel like someone actually cares about me. Even if it's only because you think you have to it's nice to pretend."

"Alex, I do care. I care about all of my subs." Those Model boys that Miles screws and sends out the door are one thing, but a submissive takes time and effort. The subs Miles chooses to take on have to have something different to set them apart from the duller masses. In Alex, he sees something truly special or he wouldn't be bothered to start from scratch.

" Why you hardly even know me," Alex said.

"It doesn't matter how well I know you. What matters is so far you're not like anyone that I do know." Miles said making Alex smile again.

"That's so sweet." Alex yawned again.

"It's time to get you in bed. Up you go." Miles said kissing Alex's cheek.

"Ok," Alex said getting up off Miles lap and heading towards the bathroom while Miles put their bowls in the sink.

When Alex went back to his room he saw Miles sitting on his bed, now stripped down to his underwear. "Think you can go for one more before bed?" He asked holding the vibrator.

"Is that what you'd like me to do sir?" Alex asked falling back onto his bed and making it shake.

"Good answer. You're catching on fast." Miles said running his hands through Alex's hair as he smiled down at him.

"Well, I'd have to be crazy to say no with how good you look right now. " Alex said putting his hand on Miles' cheek. "Any particular reason you decided to strip down?"

"I thought that I'd stay here with you tonight. If you're alright with that. You said it yourself that today was intense for you. I don't particularly want to leave you alone here especially if Alexa won't be home this evening." Miles said.

"Yeah! Of course!" Alex said. " You know I've never really had anyone stay over before. I mean Nick and I lived together and before we did we would have sleepovers because well, really he was my only friend." Alex rambled. "But this is sort of different."

"You're adorable Alex," Miles said. He likes this side of Alex. It's the boy from his video all over again.

"So what do you want to do to me now?" Alex asked. Miles can think of a lot of ways to answer that question, most of which would be out of line to respond with.

"Lay down on your back. I'll go easy on you this time. We're going to do something a little different this time." Miles instructed.

"Different how?" Alex asked.

"I think it's about time that pretty little cock of yours got some attention." Miles said, laying down next to Alex. " Go turn off the light."

"Yes, sir," Alex said getting up from the bed and crossing the room to flip the light off. Being that it was his old room Miles knows all too well that due to all the light pollution of the night time cityscape it was never truly dark and he still had a clear view of Alex as he slid off his pants.

 

"Very good Alex. Come over here would you please," Miles said sitting up on the bed and watching as Alex made his way across the room.

"I always forget how cool that view is. Then I shut off the lights for bed and remember I'm living in something straight out of a movie. Sometimes I don't believe it." Alex said looking past Miles out the window.

" I used to feel the same when I first moved here," Miles said.

" And now?" Alex asked.

"I've learned that there are things in this city much more breathtaking then it's skyline," Miles said.

"That's deep," Alex said, making his way back over to the bed and sitting on the edge next to Miles.

"I've been told I say profound things once in a while," Miles said. " I promise I'm not as bad as my reputation might lead you to believe."

"I know what the rumors are about you," Alex admitted.

"They're not rumors. They're a legacy I've built myself." Miles said.

"Whatever you want to call them... People have tried to tell me things but I have no interest in hearing what they have to say. You're nice to me, I don't want anything to poison that notion."Alex said.

"For as young as you are you're a very bright boy Alex," Miles said pulling the smaller boy down to lay next to him and kissing his forehead.

"You say bright, others would say naïve," Alex said.

"Mmm, this is getting far to serious right now Alex," Miles said. " I had something much lighter in mind."

"Oh right yeah! Round three." Alex laughed. " So what did you want me to do?"

"I think I've done more than enough to get you off today. This time I'd like to just sit back and enjoy the view." Miles said smiling at Alex. " you're going to put on a little show for me Alex. I want to watch you jerk off. Show me what I know you were doing the night that you sent me those photos of you." Alex blushed at the memory of the photographs. He also remembered just how it was that that particular conversation ended.

"What does me jerking off for you have to do with the vibrator? It's not like you haven't seen me touch myself before." Alex said. " You've got the footage at home if you really wanted to have a wank over me." Alex joked.

"Don't get smart with me Alexander." Miles snapped. He expects Alex to remember just who it is that is really in control here. "You're going to use the vibrator to help you." Miles said, grabbing the toy and turning it to a medium speed. " Likes this." He reached to drag the smooth edge over the tip of Alex's quickly stiffening erection earning a gasp from the boy.

"Fuck...." He muttered, biting down on his lip.

"See, it doesn't always have to be inside you to make you feel good does it?" Miles asked, handing the vibrator over to Alex.

"No, sir it doesn't." Alex said. repeating Miles previous actions. "So good." He whined.

You like that don't you. You know you've cum for me twice today without ever being touched. Did you even noticed." Miles asked.

"No, sir. I didn't." Alex said continuing to rub the vibrator over his length. He's trying his best to keep his eyes open and to play up his actions for Miles but it was incredibly hard to do so. This being the third time he'd been aroused that day his stamina was starting to waiver which Miles could obviously see.

"Have you ever had two orgasms back to back like that before Alex? What is the most you've ever had in a day?" Miles questioned, sliding his hand into his underwear.

 

"N-no I haven't." Alex said. " Usually just one, maybe two if something has me really worked up." He took this vibrator in his palm and pressed it to the underside of his length. Stroking both together and letting the vibrations course through his body causing him to moan.

"I think you're capable of much more than that. We'll have to test that notion one of these days now won't we." Miles laughed, pushing his underwear down and starting to stroke himself. It was the first time Alex was really getting a good view of Miles entirely naked. Being that he was a fashionable man Miles always looked good in anything that he chose to wear, but Alex thinks he looks better with nothing on at all. " Do you like something you see?"

"Yeah," Alex replied he wants to reach out and touch but he's not sure that he's allowed.

"Yeah?" Miles asked.

"I um mean yes, sir." Alex corrected himself.

"Much better. Just because I'm letting your needy little cock get hard looking at me doesn't mean you're allowed to get lazy and forget who's in charge." Miles said.

"Miles." Alex whimpered. He enjoys when Miles says dirty things to him. Something about the way he puts him in his place is a turn on.

"Yes?" Miles smirked knowing that Alex didn't really have anything to say. He likes hearing the way his name rolled off the younger boys lips almost as if he was pleading with him. He enjoyed watching the faces Alex had rubbed the vibrator over his cock finding which ways it felt best pressed against him. He watched as Alex's eyes rolled back in his head as he slid the tip of the vibrator against the underside of his head his mouth opening wide as he did. Alex didn't have to put in much effort to make himself enticing for Miles all he had to do was enjoy the way his body felt with the new sensations washing over him. The only response he was given was a few strangled cries.

Miles was surprised at how fast he found himself approaching the edge. He could feel the heat building in his stomach as he watched Alex's movement as he ran the vibrator which now pulsated at random intervals across the underside of his shaft. "You look very pretty with your nice new toy Alex." He complimented him earning another grunt from Alex. " It's polite to say thank you when you've been complimented." Miles I already panting a bit as he says it.

"Thank you, sir." Alex groaned barely able to make out full words.

"You're getting close, aren't you. That sweet little cock of yours was so desperate for attention and now you're trying your hardest not to finish too early aren't you." Miles teased. Alex whined against biting his lip. He's already exhausted and only running further and further out of energy.

"Can't last much longer." He muttered with a pained sigh.

"It's alright Alex. You have my permission to go ahead and cum." Miles said. He hadn't been expecting too much out of him this third round and he'd done a more than satisfactory job. That and Miles too was looking to finish up and get some shut eye.

Almost as soon as the word were out of Miles' mouth Alex dropped the vibrator to the bed and wrapped his fingers around the head of his member giving it a few quick hard rubs before he came into his fist, trying not to get any on the sheets. Knowing that Miles had enjoyed seeing it earlier Alex raised his hand to his lips and licked away the warm white liquid.

"You like the taste don't you? Do you usually swallow." Miles asked, thoroughly enjoying the exaggerated motions of Alex's tongue across his own skin.

"Yes, sir." Alex said with a smirk. " You said earlier I shouldn't be wasteful!"

 

"You're right I did, didn't I? Well, I guess that means you'll have to have mine as well then."

"Can I?" Alex asked he seemed eager which Miles found surprising.

"Of course. " Miles said, sitting up on his knees on the bed Alex sat up a little so he was eye level with Miles leaking erection. He reached out to stroke it for him but his hand was quickly batted away. " Not tonight Alex. You may look, but I haven't given you permission to touch yet." He said. Alex whined in displeasure but didn't move away. " Open your mouth." Miles instructed as his breathing became more sporadic. Alex did as he was told opening his mouth wide and sticking his tongue out so as not to miss a drop. Miles moved closer, warm skin just barely out of reach from Alex's mouth as he spilled himself onto the boys waiting tongue with a loud moan. Alex took care to lick every bit from his lips. A site which Miles enjoyed more than he would like to admit. He leaned forward to lick the last of the substance from Miles tip but Miles quickly pulled away.

"Daddy, I just wanted to finish cleaning up like a good boy." Alex said batting his eyelashes although the idea of actually calling Miles daddy as anything more than a joke made him want to laugh.

"I didn't grant you permission to touch. You haven't earned the privilege of sucking my cock yet." Miles said. " Maybe your next lesson I'll let you."

"When will that be?" Alex pouted falling back on the bed.

"Not for a while if you're going to pout like a child when you don't get your way." Miles said.

"I'll behave." Alex said, yawning and rolling onto his side.

"Good boy." Miles praised, laying next to Alex and pulling the covers over them. " You did do very well. I can see clearly that you have what it takes to please me. You work hard to do what I ask of you." He said pulling the boy into his arms. Alex smiled rolling over to press his face into Miles' chest.

"...Do you do this will all of your subs?" He asked after a moment of silence.

"Every submissive is different. They need different things during play as well as after. So aftercare is different for everyone. Jay likes sex after a scene because usually, our sessions focus on pain and impact play. He also generally needs some first aid. Owen prefers to be left alone when we're finished, but I always stay close by in case he decides he needs me which he will on occasion." Miles explained.

"And how do you know what I need?" Alex asked.

"I can't entirely anticipate your needs like I can theirs, but I can give it a good guess until I learn what works best for you. Besides this is all very new to you and I worry that you would get emotional if I left you alone." Miles said running his long fingers through Alex's hair as the smaller boy leaned into his touch. Miles thinks Alex has started to nod off when he speaks again.

"No one's ever held me like this before." He whispered. There's an undertone of profound sadness in the way that he says it that hurts Miles heart in ways he's not used to feeling. " Not since I was a kid..." He adds which only drives it home. The last person to have their arms around him in such a way was most likely the mother that exiled him. Miles assumption seems to be right as he feels Alex give a little shake followed by muted sniffling sound. Miles isn't really surprised that Alex is crying. He's young and having intense new experiences that send a rush of chemicals flooding his brain for most of the day has probably left him a little off balance

"Sssh, it's alright my little prince. No more tears ok?" Miles said pulling him tighter against his bare chest. Alex looked up at Miles, his eyes glassy and brimming with tears that hadn't yet made their way down his reddened cheeks.

"Sorry, guess I'm emotional after all." Alex muttered.

"It's perfectly alright, but that doesn't mean I want to see you cry." Miles said, wiping away some of the tears with his thumb. "Calm yourself, it's time to go to sleep. You're going to wake up feeling like a new person in the morning." He added leaning a little closer to give Alex a quick peck on the lips. Miles didn't notice, but Alex's mind registered it as the first time Miles had kissed him. He tried to follow the soft pink skin with his own lips, now bitten and bruised from his earlier assault on them. Miles gave in giving him one more sweet kiss, letting it linger a little longer this time before pulling back. " Goodnight Alex."

"Goodnight Miles."


	4. All The Negatives Have Been Destroyed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yay more Shadow Play WOOOH. This would have been done like an hour ago if I could have decided on a title for it. I really wanted to use a Dandy Warhols song title, andI seriously considered calling it 'not if you were the last junkie on earth' but then all I could think of is how I really wanted an excuse to call one of the chapters 'Hard on for Jesus'... one of these days I will make this dream a reality. 
> 
> Anyways, as promised, another installment of Shadow Play while the finale of Aviation is in the works. It's like 80% of the way done, but working on 3 chapters all at once is hard work that ends in a ridiculously high words count. So while that's still getting polished up I really hope you enjoy this. Let me know what you think. I love all of you <3
> 
> ((Also it's occurred to me now that some of you here on AO3 have no idea what Aviation is cause it's only on Wattpad. When it's finished this week I'll post it on here in its entirety))

Alex woke up alone in the morning. Of course, Miles would have left by now. Alex rolled over to check the clock. It was only 6:30 they had gone to bed remarkably early by Alex's standards. He worked today but not until noon for the lunch shift. He was about to roll over and go back to sleep when he heard voices coming from the other room.

"I don't know if I should be surprised or not. You are absolutely ruthless after all." He heard Alexa's voice from the kitchen and decided to get up from the bed. Was she fighting with someone?

 

"Alexa, it's not like that." Was that Miles' voice? Alex crept from his room towards the dimly lit kitchen, staying concealed in the shadows as he moved.

"You can say that all you like but I know you better than that Kane," Alexa shouted, slamming her fist down on the counter. " You brought him to me because you saw a kid who was down on his luck and I did what you said! I took him in! As soon as I did I realized that you were right, he's a good kid. He's a sweet boy and I won't let you fuck that up."

"I'm not trying to fuck anything up! He's the one who approached me about it after last night."

"Bullshit!"

"No, look for yourself," Miles said handing his phone with the open text box to Alexa.

"Why is he in your phone as ' Aly Lavender'?" Alexa asked.

" I thought it would make a good porn name." Alex had to cover his mouth to stop from laughing and giving himself away.

"Miles, please for once in your life know when you've gone too far. He's young and he's sure not used to people like you. Don't take advantage of him." Alexa sighed.

"Oh yes. Because I constantly take advantage of Jeff... and Jay too and oh Owen I do awful horrible things to that poor little tweaker." Miles said sarcastically. " I might screw most of the models that walk into my studio, but don't you ever accuse me of taking advantage of any of my submissives you know me better than that."

"Honestly Miles, if you were a good man you'd have settled yourself down with Jay by now. You'd let Jeff go on with his life, you'd stop messing with Owen and you'd finally give that boy the attention he deserves because he loves you." Alexa said.

"I don't want to be with Jay. I know he loves me, but I'm not in love with him. Do I care about him deeply? Of course, I do, but I don't love him in that way. He knows that and it's his choice to stay. The same with the others." Miles replied calmly.

"Then who do you love Miles?"

" No one." He said with the same flat tone.

"I know what you're thinking... About Alex. Alex is never going to be like him." Alexa said. There was a note of sympathy in her voice.

"He doesn't have to be. I don't want him to be. Alex is sweet, I enjoy spending time with him. Know I won't hurt him and let that be enough. He's made the choice that he wants to experiment and at least with me you know that he's safe. I'm not the sort who will do something deplorable like telling him I love him so I can fuck him and leave" Miles sighed.

" But Miles, you made that video with him. Did you not listen to anything that he said. He's looking for someone to love him...I Have to admit, I was surprised to get home and see you in your old bed. I thought I was dreaming for a second then I saw that Alex was there too." Alexa said.

"Today was strenuous for him. I wouldn't have wanted to leave him alone. In case he had a drop." Miles said. Drop? What did Miles mean by drop? Alex wondered. He made a mental note to look it up later.

"Jesus Miles what did you do to him?" Alexa asked.

"Took him to the pleasure chest and got him a couple new toys. We had an agreement that I would get him his first one if he won last night and he did." Miles said.

"I know, I saw the video. Or did you forget that there was a camera on the two of you?" Alexa asked. "You know, half the reason people were swayed to vote for you is on your shoulders too Mi. Most of the people I talked to said if it had been Alex alone they'd have voted differently. What they enjoyed so much was the chemistry between you two, the things you brought out in each other."

"Guess it ended up as more of a partner scene then I intended it to." Miles shrugged. " I didn't do anything spectacular. I just tried to coax him out of his shell a bit."

" Out of his shell and out of his pants." Alexa laughed.

"You know he's a really bold little boy," Miles said. " More so than he thinks. I want to see that come out of him. He talks about wanting to change and be the person he couldn't be in the past, and he needs some guidance to get there."

"Oh? And you think you're that wise older man who is going to give it to him."Alexa asked.

"Well, I can sure give him some of the things that he wants." Miles wiggled his eyebrow.

"Don't be disgusting Miles." Alexa rolled her eyes.

"What? It's true. He was dying for everything that I did today. You should have seen him he looked incredible." Miles said, leaning against the counter. Alex blushed, he didn't think that he was anything particularly special despite what Miles says.

"You just want him because you know that you can't have it." Alexa teased.

"It doesn't matter if you're right or not. He's not going to let me have anything unless that's what he wants." Miles shrugged.

" Who knows. Maybe this one's different Miles. Maybe this time you fall in love and-"

"Alexa you know me well enough to know that I don't do love," Miles said.

"Because you've become a cynical twat. You're going to be thirty soon-"

"Woah WOAH I'm only twenty-eight aren't you skipping a year there?" Miles seemed to be slightly panicked by the idea.

" It doesn't matter if it's next year or five years from now. Miles, I just don't want you to end up alone and lonely because you were too trapped in your own lifestyle to let someone in." Alexa said. Miles sighed it's an argument that they've had dozens of time.

" No, I told you. Never again." Miles said. " I should get back to bed. I don't want Alex to wake up alone and think I left him."

"He's already up. He's standing in the hallway I can see his toes." Alexa said. Fuck, he'd been caught. What if Miles was mad. What if he was in trouble? Did he want to be in trouble?

"Alexander, come over here please," Miles said without looking in his direction.

"Am... am I in trouble?" Alex asked slipping out from his place in shadows and into the glowing kitchen light.

"I haven't decided yet. How long have you been eavesdropping for?" Miles asked, pulling the smaller boy against his waist.

" I just got up and I heard voices," Alex said, it wasn't a lie. Not really anyways.

" Oh, and how much of the conversation those voices were having did you hear?" Miles asked, brushing Alex's messy curls from his face.

"Alexa thinks you're going to hurt me... but I made the decision! I want you to teach me. I like it." Alex said, wrapping his arms around Miles' neck. Miles sighed and looked away grabbing Alex's arms and removing them.

"Alex, go back to bed. I'll be there to deal with you in a moment." Miles said.

"Y-yes, sir," Alex said scampering off.

"Look now you've gone and scared him." Alexa scolded.

" He's not scared he's excited. He thinks he's going to get punished, it's something that we discussed today." Miles said.

"Are you planning to punish him?" Alex asked.

" No, not at all," Miles said, grabbing a glass of water from the sink and leaving Alexa alone in the kitchen. He walks back into his old room, now Alex's. Alex was already curled back under the blanket with his eyes closed. "I know you're not asleep yet," Miles said walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed. " Here, sit up, drink this." Alex cracked one eye open to see Miles holding a cup of water in his direction. He whined but sat up anyways taking the glass from Miles and gulping down half of it.

" I'm sorry I listened in on your conversation," Alex said looking down at the glass in his hands.

"It's alright, maybe some of those things you needed to hear," Miles said.

"Like what?" Alex asked.

"That I won't hurt you, but everyone else will think that I'm going to. God forbid this is why I don't let Alexa get attached to my submissives she starts to care and then she sticks her nose where it doesn't belong." Miles said.

"So is she right then. Is this a bad idea?" Alex asked.

"Only if you feel that it is," Miles said, taking the cup from Alex and putting it down next to the bed before crawling back under the blankets with him. "It's not too late for you to decided that it's not something that you want to do."

"No... no, I want to keep going. I like this, but... I do have some questions." Alex admitted.

"About what?" Miles asked.

"Is it true? What Alexa said about Jay? That he's in love with you?" Alex asked. " And you just let him hold onto false hope."

"Anything to do with my other subs is really none of your business Alex, but if you must know I'm not giving Jay false hope. He is aware that things won't change between us." Miles said. " He's free to leave anytime and he wouldn't be the first one to go."

"Would you be sad if he left?" Alex asked.

"Jay and I have been friends for years. I care very deeply about him. We share a very close bond. Even if he chose to no longer be my sub I have no doubt we would remain close." Miles shrugged.

"It doesn't seem to affect you at all..."Alex said.

"That's because it doesn't," Miles said.

"And yet you claim to care about him," Alex said, laying back down, but positioning himself further away from Miles this time.

"I don't claim anything that isn't true," Miles said.

"But how could you know someone so intimately and not develop feelings for them. I saw how you were with him the other night when you were leaving the club." Alex said.

"How is that and different than the way I was treating you earlier. I'm not so cold-hearted that I can't show affection but I don't let it affect my emotions because I'm not some Naive little boy." Miles snapped. "You're walking on thin ice Alex. I suggest that you go back to sleep and not question my relationship with Jay any further," Miles said.

"... I'm sorry. I was just curious is all." Alex sighed rolling away from Miles.

"It's alright, but you need to learn that it's not your place to ask questions about my private life the same way that I don't ask about things like your scars," Miles said. Oddly that seemed like a fair enough exchange although something in the way it's stated led Alex to realize he actually knows nearly nothing about Miles.

Miles sighed realizing how closed off Alex's body language is after the way he'd snapped at him. "Alex... come over here." Miles sighed

"I'm fine where I am," Alex said.

"I didn't mean to be short with you," Miles said, grabbing Alex and physically pulling him closer.

" I shouldn't have said anything. I had no right to and I had no right to listen in on you and Alexa. I should have stayed in bed and minded my own business." Alex sighed playing with the edge of the blanket as he started to drift back to sleep.

When he wakes again the sun is up, but his alarm hadn't gone off causing a slightly panic as the boy opened his eyes with a gasp, sitting upright. It's only then that he notices that Miles is still next to him. "Fuck what time is it?" Alex asks trying to reach over Miles for his phone.

"Good morning to you too. Did you sleep well?" Miles asked as he stretched.

"I overslept! I have work in an hour! There's no way that I can get ready and be down there in time and if I fuck up one more time I might not have a job anymore." Alex said jumping out of bed and looking around for his clothes.

"Have they decided to make you a server yet?" Miles asked

"Yeah they're letting me give it a shot, but I'm already on thin ice. One fuck up and they'll cut me because I'm-"

"Queer?" Miles asked.

"I don't like that word," Alex said shooting Miles as look.

"Why? It's what you are. It's what we all are in this house. There's no shame in it." Miles said reaching for Alex's cigarettes which were on the floor next to the bed and lighting one.

"It's a dirty word," Alex said rushing around in a panic. "Dammit, I'm not going to have time to shower...." He muttered to himself as he sniffed under his arms.

"Relax will you? I'm going that way anyways. I'll get us a cab and drop you off. You'll get there in half the time and you won't have to worry about the train. Hurry go rinse off fast and we'll get going." Miles said.

"You... you really don't have to do that," Alex said. He doesn't like to rely on the charity of others.

" Of course I do. You wouldn't have overslept if I hadn't worn you out last night. Besides, I might be in the mood for some pancakes." Miles said getting up and looking for his discarded clothing.

"No! Nooooo, you're not coming into the diner that would be..."

"What? Embarrassing?" Miles asked.

"What if my boss gets the wrong idea?" Alex asked.

"About what? We're not a couple. I'm simply a customer who wants some breakfast, and possibly to admire the help." Miles said following Alex into the bathroom to wash up.

"Oh yeah, because it's all the sweet little girls that you'll be ogling." Alex scoffed.

"You're very argumentative in the morning. It's the village, I'm allowed to look at an attractive man if I'd like." Miles said wrapping an arm around Alex's waist as he got out of the shower. " What's got you in such a mood."

"I'm late for work and you being there is just going to be... distracting." Alex sighed pulling away and walking back into his room. Miles is a little perplexed by this yesterday Alex would roll over and purr at the slightest bit of attention. Since their conversation earlier that morning he seemed to be acting a little more distantly. Had what Miles said about Jay swayed Alex's opinions of him? Had he decided to change his mind?

"Alex?" Miles asked as he followed him back into the bedroom.

"Hm?"

"Is something bothering you?" Mile inquired. "You're not changing your mind are you?"

"No... I'm sorry. I'm not a morning person." Alex said pulling on a longs sleeved black shirt. The hem lay below the top of his black skinny jeans. " I'm glad to be a server now, though, I like the uniform better. I can wear something that actually fits me as long as it's all black." Alex said.

"It's missing something," Miles said. He walked over to Alex's dresser and picked up the same bow that he'd seen in Alex's photos he'd sent him the other day. He walked over to Alex and clipped the bow into his hair. " There perfect."

" You know I can't wear it..." Alex sighed.

"Of course you can, it looks adorable on you," Miles said kissing Alex's forehead.

"Now, don't forget about your rules today and make sure that you get me your work schedule," Miles said as they got out of the cab.

"I will... are you coming in? Or were you kidding earlier?" Alex asked.

" I'll be in there in a minute," Miles said lighting up a cigarette as he watches Alex scamper inside just in time to punch in.

"Turner! Thank god you know you're already on thin ice honey where were you?" One of the older waitresses asked.

" Mary, I'm here aren't I! By the skin of my teeth, but I'm here." Alex said, tying his apron around his waist.

"It's not like you to cut it this close. Is everything alright?" Mary asked.

 

"What? Yeah, everything is great actually. Never been better. I just overslept a little that's all." Alex shrugged.

"Overslept for a lunch shift? You must have been out late last night." She gave him the younger boy an all knowing look with her hands on her hip.

"I wasn't out really," Alex said smirking to himself. " I better hurry up and get started." He added before any further questions could be asked of him. He grabbed a coffee pot and went to refill the cup of the woman by the window who seemed to be trying to catch his attention. This gave him an opportunity to peek out the window and see that Miles was just about to finish his cigarette and come inside. " You mind if I take this next table?"

" Need the money hun?" Mary asked.

"Um, yeah that and-" Alex turned around as he heard the bell above the door wrong to signal someone's entrance. Alex couldn't help looking over his shoulder and just in time to see Miles pull off his sunglasses and take a seat in one of the booths by the window.

"Oh, I get it." The older woman smirked. " Go and get 'em, tiger." Alex smiled and walked over to Miles, putting on the same cheery face he would with all of the other customers. The difference with Miles is that he doesn't have to fake a smile as he approaches his seat.

"Afternoon sir, what can I get for you?" He asked pulling out his pad and paper as Miles flipped through the menu.

"Coffee black please," Miles said, flashing Alex a glint of pearl white teeth causing the boy's features to grow slightly pink. " And what would you recommend? What's your favorite." he inquired putting down the menu and leaning closer to where Alex stood.

"I um... I dunno. Rick is in the kitchen today and he makes the best grilled cheese. Or pancakes! He made these really good ones the other day that had like three kinds of berries in them and they didn't even need syrup. I bet if I asked him real nice he would make them again!"Alex said.

"Pancakes sound great. What kinda I'll leave up to you. Also, order yourself something healthy for later whenever you get your break and put it on my bill." Miles said.

"I...I don't think I can do that." Alex said.

"What I'm not allowed to buy you dinner for later? Remember what I said about making sure you eat Alex." Miles said in a hushed tone.

"I... um I'll ask," Alex said. " I'll be right back with your coffee." He added quickly as he saw the manager emerge from the back.

"You know that fella?" Mary asked as Alex came back to put on a new pot of coffee now that the last one was empty.

"Yeah," Alex blushed. " He's friends with my new roommate Alexa."

"The look on your face tells me it's more than that," Mary said as Alex looked for a coffee cup that didn't have a chip in it. " You sweet on him?"

"What? No! He's just nice to me, that all!" Alex insisted, filling up the cup.

"You might want to change your stance on that. He's certainly looking at you." Mary said.

" No, not looking at me. Looking out for me. He's made himself a bit of a mentor figure in my life." Alex shrugged.

"Turner cut the chit chat you have tables." The manager said walking past. Alex didn't say a word he just turned towards Miles to go and deliver his coffee.

"The manager is in a bad mood this afternoon." He said in a half whisper to Miles. " I don't even want to ask him about it. He already hates me."

"Then send him over here, I'll speak to him," Miles suggested.

"That could still get me in trouble. It was a very kind offer but," Alex looked over his shoulder at his boss, and then back at Miles. "I'm sorry I can't talk..." He said heading back over to the server's station to help Mary roll bundles of silverware. He decided, for now, it was probably best if he just kept his mouth shut in general.

"You know Alex if you keep letting him treat you like that you're never going to get any respect in this godforsaken place," Mary said.

 

"What who Miles?" Alex asked confused by her statement.

"No, Frank," Mary said nodding towards their manager. He wasn't a very tall man. His hair was gray and slightly overgrown in an attempt to look younger then his wrinkles would allow. He always wore the same combination of black slacks, white polo shirt and gold chains. The way that he strutted around the joint you'd think it was a five-star establishment, not some corner diner in the village that was known more for its regular clientele than a high volume of newcomers.

"I'd rather just fly under the radar and finish my shifts." Alex shrugged.

"You stick with that attitude and you'll be on the overnights for the rest of your life." Mary rolled her eyes. " You'll never make enough to support yourself."

"I'm doing alright, I have a side job now that made me a little extra money and my rent is decent, especially given where I live," Alex said. Although Mary has always been kind to him and he still didn't feel the need to disclose much about his private life to her other than the bare bones.

"Oh yeah, what are you doing?" Mary asked.

"Um, a little bit of modeling on my off days. Miles is actually a photographer. Sometimes he pays me for my time." Alex admitted.

"He's not asking you to take off your clothes for money is he Alex?"

"No... I mean. He has... I don't mind it I like that attention." Alex confessed. Now that he's told her this much he might as well be honest.

"Sweetheart you need to have more respect for yourself. The idea of a sweet little thing like you having to do porn to make a living makes me sick." Mary said.

"It wasn't porn it was art!" Alex insisted.

"Yeah, that's what they all say," Mary said with her hand on her hips. "What you need is some decent shifts so you can make a living wage and not have to compromise your self-respect."

"I didn't compromise anything. I told you I wanted to!" Alex said. " He wouldn't ask me to do anything that I'm not comfortable with. Even if I was doing porn what does it matter? It's my body and my choice what I want to do with it." He's starting to get a bit annoyed. He knows that Mary has the best intentions with her advice. There's not a judgmental bone in her body. Deep down she has the heart of a mother with no children of her own due to infertility. She had a habit of using the younger staff at the diner as surrogate offspring.

"Look if you're happy then far be it from me to stop you. I'm just telling you that someday there might come a time where you regret it." Mary said.

"I regret a lot of things that doesn't mean I let them change me." Alex shrugged. He grabbed the coffee pot and went to go and refill Miles cup in order to escape the conversation.

 

"Something wrong?" Miles asked when Alex's approached his table.

"No, nothing more than usual," Alex said. He always feels stressed when he's at the diner. " I'm just agitated today."

"It seems like you're a moody teenager after all. Do I detect a hint of a temper in you, Alexander?" Miles asked. The more he got to know about Alex in different environments of his life he started seeing the depth of his dimensions. The night he met him he'd have described Alex as shy, insecure, and a bit of a mess. Now he wouldn't use those terms at all. Not to say that Alex wasn't those things but he seemed more reserved than shy. His confidence still hadn't caught up to his playful side which seemed to fluster him endlessly. Those glimpses of things like bravery and friskiness that could be drawn from him and polished gave Miles high hopes for him. However, those things would only emerge if the world stopped trying to crush them out of him. Even when he'd filmed him despite high spirits Miles could see behind Alex's eyes that he was a fire that had been doused by the water bucket on one too many occasions. His shaky demeanor was simply a way of protecting himself from it happening again.

"No, sir," Alex muttered. " Is there anything else I can get you? Your pancakes will be up in a minute." His tone now fell flat as though Miles were just any other customer because he could feel the eyes of his manager as they burrowed into the back of his skull.

" No thank you, Alex, I'm good with the coffee for now," Miles said raising the cup and nodded to him. Alex nodded back before turning around and nearly bumping into the manager with his pot of coffee. As he stopped short some of the black liquid sloshed from the carafe, landing on the smooth tile floors as well as onto Frank's shirt.

"I'll uh, got get something to clean that up," Alex said trying to dodge his way around the man who leered at him only to feel his arm being grabbed.

"You need to be more aware of your surrounding Turner." Frank snapped at him with crossed arms. " What if I'd been a customer that got scalded."

"I-I'm sorry," Alex said hanging his head.

"Go get the mop, and get that ridiculous thing out of your hair! I thought we talked about this before. I don't care what you do on your own time, but you won't bring your deviant behavior into this business. This is a family establishment, people who come in here to eat don't want to see you flaunting your... lifestyle choices." Frank said reaching for the bow and snatching it out of Alex's hair, causing him to wince as it was torn away.

"Pardon me for interrupting, but is a hair bow really that big of a deal?" Miles asked, taking another sip from his coffee cup as Alex hurried off to get a broom with his head down and his figurative tail between his legs.

"Hair accessories are only included in the dress code for our female staff," Frank said. " If I were to let him violate it then it would set a president for others to do the same. First, it's him with the bow and then it's a girl who's skirt is too short. Where does it stop?"

"It seems from the way you reprimanded him just now that it has less to do with the dress code and more so his ' lifestyle' as you put it," Miles said as Alex returned with the mop. " Tell me, if he were actually transgender would it be the same? If he were transitioning and didn't identify himself as a male would he be allowed to wear it?"

"Miles... Please let it go." Alex whispered

"It wouldn't matter. If his ID says he's a man then he'll be kept to those standards." Frank said. " I should have kept you in the kitchen washing dishes." He said to Alex as he attempted to mop.

"Oh yeah? Keep the little gay boy in the back where he can't be seen right?" Miles asked.

"Miles!" Alex whimpered.

 

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave," Frank said to Miles.

"Why because I'm calling you out on being unjustly cruel to one of your employees who happens to be a friend of mine?You know, he's told me about the way you treat him" Miles said. He leaned back in the booth as if to show that he wasn't about to leave until he was satisfied that this conversation was finished.

"Oh, so he's breaking more rules than is he? Alex, you know you're not allowed to have friends in your section. It creates a distraction." Frank snapped.

"He's not a friend sir. Just an acquaintance who knows my new roommate." Alex lied in a hushed tone hanging his head.

"Still you should have allowed someone else to take the table, if you're not going to follow the rules then you can get your ass back in the kitchen." Frank seems to be reaching a boiling point Alex knows that the dam is about to break. It wouldn't be the first time He'd been screamed at. So he walked off to the kitchen. Followed by Frank. "What are you thinking Turner. The fuck is wrong with you. I take a chance on hiring you, I give you a chance to prove yourself out on the floor and you pull some shit like this. You insubordination little shit. You know not many places around here would take a little faggot like you with no experience and a defiant attitude."

Miles continues to listen as the man in the kitchen rants in ways aimed at the poor boy he wanted to protect. " Here you go sugar," Mary said, putting a plate of pancakes down in front of Miles and pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Is he always that hard on Al?" He asked.

"Frank is an asshole to begin with, but he seems to have out for your boy. Shame too, Alex is such a nice kid. Great with the customers too, but Frank doesn't see that. He just sees a boy who he can take his anger out on because he'll roll over and take it. The poor thing won't stick up for himself." Mary sighed.

"Well, if he won't stick up for himself then I'll do it for him," Miles said. He pulled out his wallet and handed Mary a few bills. " Thanks for the pancakes." He said although the plate remained untouched. He got up from the table and walked towards the back where the kitchen was. When he swung the door open Frank had Alex practically backed into a corner while he was being shouted at.

"Hey, you can't be back here." one of the cooks called out.

"Don't worry I won't be long," Miles said, walking over to Alex and grabbing his hand. "Come, Alex, we're leaving."

"You can't just do that!" Frank snapped at Miles.

"Oh, yes I can and just so you know he won't be back," Miles added as he dragged Alex from the kitchen and right out the front door of the diner past the curious eyes of the other patrons.

As they walked down the block Alex pulled himself out of Miles' grip "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR!" He screamed at him.

"Because no one should treat you like that," Miles said calmly. He slowed his pace, lighting a cigarette and offering one to Alex who slapped the pack out of his hand.

"It doesn't matter how he treats me. I NEEDED THAT JOB! Now I've got no way to support myself." Alex yelled.

"You can find another. One where you're treated like a person rather than an animal." Miles said. "I'll help you find something if you want until then I can help you out."

" NO! I don't want a fucking hand out! I can take care of myself!" Alex is furious, although really it's not at Miles. He's angry because of the way he was treated. He would have never had the courage to do what it was that Miles had just done for him. He should be thanking him, but he's in a rage and will take it out on the closest breathing body.

"Alex-"

 

"No! Just because I asked you to be my Dom doesn't mean you get to dictate all my fucking life choices! You don't even fucking know me! I'm not Jay or one of your other subs, and I don't want you meddling in the rest of my fucking life. It's MY life and I don't need your help or permission to live it on my own terms!" Miles could see that Alex was starting to crack around the edges. There were tears starting to drip from his eyes already.

"Alex, please."

"I asked you to stop. I asked you to mind your own business but you totally ignored me. I... I need to go and beg for my job back. I'll move out. I won't see you or your friends again just-" Alex is cut off by a pair of strong arms around him. Miles tries his best to get them out of the middle of the sidewalk and slightly into the Alleyway while Alex cries, trying to cling to him.

"I know you're upset I'm sorry, but you needed me to do that," Miles said.

"How do you know what I need?" Alex asked trying to push Miles away slightly only to be sucked back in.

"From what you've told me, and what you've shown me. You need someone to protect you, hold you, help to quell your fears because no one has ever been on your side before, have they, Alex? You're so used to being beaten down that you don't know what it's like to have someone fuel the fire inside of you rather than stomping it out." Miles said, in every word he says Alex knows that he's right.

" Yeah..." Alex muttered, wiping his eyes. " I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so angry. You're right I needed to get myself out of there. I just didn't think it would happen like that." He sighed. "My eyeliner is ruined..."

"That's what you're worried about?" Miles teased. " C'mon Al, let's go back to the studio for a bit then you can go look for jobs or whatever. I've got a project you can help me with today." He said slinging an arm around Alex's shoulder as they walked.

"Miles! This is so boring."Alex complained in exasperation a couple hours later as he sat surrounded by box upon box of slides. He'd been sorting them into Miles new file boxes he had bought to organize them by what was written on them.

"I said I would pay you to do it. You're the one who insisted that you didn't want a hand out after all." Miles said. He currently sat behind his laptop editing and answering emails. Since it was a Sunday afternoon there was no one else in the studio other than the two of them as Miles did most of his shoots on weekdays.

Alex huffed, blowing his overgrown bangs out of his hair. He picked up another box that looked as though it was meant to keep index cards in. He popped it open, noticing that none of the slides had names or numbers to identify them like most of the others did. Maybe they were misplaced? Alex took a couple of them from the box holding them up to the light to see if the images possibly match anything from sets he had already seen.

The first slides seemed to be of someone Alex guessed was Miles although with fewer years on him, and another boy. His hair was slicked back, his face round with a prominent nose and a broad smile on his face. As Alex continued through them he noticed more of the same. Miles with this boy. None of them seemed to be taken at the same time, leading Alex to believe they could be personal photos until he picks one that simply says the words ' Wendy Wonders' on the front Up to the light Alex can see that it's the same boy but with much longer hair that is cut similar to a style he himself had when he was younger. The only reason he can tell it's the same person is by the distinctive nose, otherwise, Alex might have mistaken it as a younger version of himself.

"Miles, nothing in this box has anything written on them," Alex announces, getting up from where he'd been sitting cross-legged on the floor and making his way over to Miles desks. "Except this one," Alex said handing him the box along with the lone labeled slide. Miles took one look at the box and threw it into the garbage.

"They're nothing important." He said trying to brush it off.

"You didn't even look," Alex said.

"Because I don't need to. I know what they are. I thought I threw them away a long time ago. Alexa must have pulled them out of the trash or something. Nosy girl." Miles mumbled the last part under his breath.

"They looked like personal photos," Alex said.

"And personally I want them thrown away," Miles said. " Now would you please go back to what you were doing and if you come across anything else that is unlabeled then assume that it's a mistake and should be discarded." Alex is about to say something in protest but the studio door flings open before he can, revealing a tall, lanky, man with unwashed reddish brown hair who comes barging in. His tank top shows off his thin arms which are dusted with the occasional freckles, as is the bridge of his nose. His jeans are torn and look as they're two sizes too big, as his belt clings to his narrow, mostly exposed hips.

"MILES!" He calls out, his eyes darting back and forth as he scratches frantically at his arms. "What the hell, it's Sunday! You said you were going to call me on Sunday! I thought you were going to call me today about that thing we're supposed to do at Shadow Play. It is this week, right? I thought you said it was this week or did I mix my dates up again. Oh, fuck I fucked up my days again. I didn't miss it did I? Thought today was Sunday." He talks quickly making his way to Miles desk without acknowledging Alex in the slightest. The smaller boy gives the new man an odd look before making his way back to the spot where he'd been working previously.

 

With an exasperated sigh, Miles removes his glasses and rubs the bridge of his nose. "Owen, what are you doing here?" He asks.

 

"You said Sunday!" Owen said. "It's always Sundays!"

"Yes, Owen but it's only three in the afternoon. You know I edit on Sundays. If I have work to do then I'll call you when I'm finished." Miles said leaning back in his chair.

" You're always busy, you don't have any time for me Miles cause you only like Jay. Jay said he saw you on Friday, so that means I get to come over on Sunday!" Owen insisted.

"I'm aware Owen. We made plans but I told you I would call you when I was finished. Considering the state that you're in, I'm rethinking my decision. How long have you been up?" Miles asked.

"Does it matter?" Owen complained as he started to pace back and forth across the open space in the studio. " C'mon. I've got some good crystal. Can't we just go upstairs? Please?"

"Owen I'm working," Miles repeated again

"But It's better than work. Why won't you fuck me anymore? You used to love to get high with me and ram my-"

"That's enough," Miles said sternly.

"You're no fun anymore! C'mon I'll let you do anything you want to me. Anything, Anything you want. Make me bleed again. I want to feel it, please? I'm so on right now and-"

"Yeah, you're on alright. On drugs." Miles rolled his eyes looking down at his computer again. "Now would you stop this little fit of yours that you're having. You're in not condition to play today."

"I am if you do a bump with me. We can party like we usually do. Please!" Owen complained. "You never give me any attention anymore! It's all about Jay this and Jay that!"

"Because He knows how to keep his nose clean. I told you, Owen, you're on probation for your behavior."

"At least my tricks pay attention to me! Fuck you, Miles!" Owen growled before making a rather pathetic whining sound and sitting down on the floor. " I don't mean that. I don't mean it. Please."

"If this is how you're going to be then you know you won't be allowed to come to Shadow Play," Miles said. "Josh won't let you in if he can tell you're high and I do need your help this week."

"Does that mean that I'm not in trouble anymore then?" Owen asked.

"You need to learn to control yourself, Owen," Miles said sternly. " I'm still disappointed with you."

"If you spent more time with me I wouldn't disappoint you," Owen complained.

Alex hadn't moved from his spot on the floor as he stared at the strange display in front of him. That is until Owen caught sight of him. "Oh, I see how it is. So is this Eugene 2.0 then?" He asked looking over at Alex and crawling towards him on the floor. "Jay is just having an absolute fit about you! Says pretty soon Miles will forget all about us because he's got a new favorite play thing. He's cute Miles but haven't you already had enough of the young ones? I thought you were into actual men now that were past puberty." Owen obviously thought that it was a joke but Miles didn't seem to take it that way.

"When did you see Jay?" Miles asked.

"I didn't but he called me to rant about some new little Twink that you ditched him for on Friday," Owen said. " Said the little fairy boy isn't even a sub and you still treated him better. I thought models were only a one time fuck!" Alex is starting to get massively uncomfortable with the current situation.

"Should I go?" He asked looking over at Miles.

" No Alex, you're just fine where you are. It's Owen who needs to be on his way isn't that right Owen."

"But it's Sunday!"

"I don't give a fuck what day it is! You've come in here high out of your mind disrupting my work and talking about a boy you know nothing about right in front of him. My friendship with Alex sexual or not is none of your business. You know this is UNACCEPTABLE behavior. Now when I say you need to leave I mean I want you out!" Miles yelled. Alex flinched. He'd never really heard Miles raise his voice in such a way.

"Fine, I'll go... Can I borrow some money, though? I've got Jamie on my ass." Owen said getting up and calming down some as he walked to the door.

" How much do you need?" Miles asked sighing and getting up from his desk and walking towards the door.

"I owe him eighty." Owen sighed. Miles reached into his back pocket.

"Here's a hundred. Pay him back and get yourself something to eat. Do you have someplace to stay tonight? If you don't when you sober up come back and you can sleep in sleep in the spare room alright?" Miles sighed.

"Thanks, Miles..." Owen sighed leaning into the other man now that he was closer to him. It looked a bit silly considering their obvious difference in height. Owen seemed to calm down for a moment, leaning his head on Miles' shoulder. Miles sighed momentarily stroking the small hairs on the back of Owen's neck.

" You know I'm only angry with you because I know you're capable of more," Miles muttered to him before guiding him back towards the elevator. " I'm sorry about him." He told Alex as soon as Owen had left them. " Sometimes he has these outbursts of his. He isn't thinking. Owen is troubled, that's why we don't see much of each other these days."

"He seems very odd..." Alex admitted.

"When he's sober he's an entirely different person. Owen is very talented. He was when I met him at least. Still is deep down. Before the drugs got a hold of him he was an amazing violinist. Without a doubt one of the most talented musicians that I've ever seen. Ruined his chances, though, it's really a shame. Part of me thinks that what he's doing is to punish himself for his perceived failures. There's really no hope in getting through to him anymore so I just do the best I can to help him." Miles sighed. " I didn't intend for you two to meet that way... or ever really."

"He said he knows Jay, though. Are all of your other subs friends and I'm the odd one out?" Alex asked. To be honest he's still curious about the others. If Miles shares his time between them he wants to know what it is that he's up against.

"Because of certain circumstances they are. We're all a part of the scene at Shadow Play and have been for some time, so it makes sense that they would all be acquainted. I met Owen through my submissive who's been with me the longest Jeff." Miles shrugged.

"Jeff?" Alex asked. He'd heard the name mentioned twice now in passing, but knew nothing about him other than that he existed.

"Yeah, Jeff and I were friends back home," Miles said. He sat down on the studio couch rather than at his desk, patting the space next to him for Alex to come and join him. "Just like Matt and Alexa. We're still friends but he's not really one of my boys anymore. He's was always more of a switch and less of a sub in the traditional sense. We're more like play partners then having what you might call a defined sub and dom relationship. We're close, but he has two submissives of his own now. A boy and a girl and they're all quite happy in their little polyamorous bubble." Miles sighed lighting up a cigarette.

"Oh, that sounds nice," Alex said taking a seat next to Miles and leaning closer as he listened interestedly, wanting to know more about Miles past.

 

"Jeff introduced me to Owen not too long after we moved to New York. I guess he fond him at some art show or something. The first time I met Owen was when Jeff took me to this strange event where Owen was part of a group of musicians that was doing a live score for a vintage porn film. It was all very high brow actually."

"That sounds really interesting. You said he plays violin right?" Alex asked.

"Played, I don't even think he has one anymore. Pawned it off long ago for a few bucks to get dope. We all have our habits, but Owen has taken it to another level. He's gone too far. It's not that I haven't tried to help him. We all have, but when a junkie needs a fix there's nothing that you can say or do to reach them." Miles shrugged.

"So what he was saying earlier, that you would get high with him..."

"It's true, but I've never come close to falling into the patterns that he has. Although Matt and Alexa would debate that. That's part of why I've been putting some distance between Owen and myself." Miles shrugged. Suddenly the comments made the other day are starting to make sense about why they don't want Miles to see Jamie. He's their dealer.

"I've never done any drugs," Alex said. " Well, I mean... I've smoked a spliff before once or twice but that doesn't really count does it?"

"No, not at all. Let's hope to keep it that way." Miles said.

"I don't plan to change." Alex shrugged.

"No one ever plans to. You think a few years ago Owen thought he was going to be strung out the way he is today? I can assure you it was never his plan either. That's what this city can do to the weak and the sad." Miles said.

"So you think he's weak then?" Alex asked.

"No, Owen is just sad and self-deprecating. He used to justify that it was good for his art, but he never liked his work anyways. He doesn't have that excuse to rest on these days." Miles sighed. He doesn't like to think about the way someone who was once close to him has now allowed himself to be stripped of everything that mattered to him. "He's allowed it to destroy him and compromise everything he ever wanted. Maybe that's why I can't give up on him. Jay is just as stubborn as I am. He and I are really the only ones who haven't cut Owen out of our lives entirely."

For Alex, it's hard to imagine someone like Alexa being able to turn her back on anyone. Although he's only known he for a couple of weeks now. She was kind hearted and righteous from as much as he could tell, but maybe there were parts of her personality that were more vicious? He didn't really intend to find out.

"Jay and Owen used to be very close. It was Owen that brought Jay into our scene a few years ago. He introduced Jay to his first Dom at Shadow Play." Miles explained.

"So you weren't his first Dom then?" Alex asked.

"No, I've only been training him for about six months now although we've known each other for years prior to that. When we first met...the timing wasn't right for me to train him." Miles said knitting his brows together as he tried his best to answer Alex's questions without revealing too much about himself. Miles didn't mind talking about other people that were part of his life, but when it came down to speaking about himself he tended to shut down questions quickly.

"Were you training Owen then?"

"No, I had in the past for a time, but when we met Jay...." Again that look as if not sure how to answer without giving away to much. " I had another submissive who was a bit of a handful. He took up a great deal of my time."

"So Jeff, Jay, Owen, which one is Eugene?" Alex asked.

"What?" Miles asked, How on earth did Alex know about Eugene?

"Owen called me Eugene 2.0 earlier. Didn't seem thrilled about it either. Who is he? Why would Owen compare me to him." Alex said as he fidgeted with the material of his pants. He felt unsure as to whether he should be asking or not. Miles had made it clear to him that morning that he was not to ask questions about the other submissives, but in light of him having just met Owen, Miles seemed to be fairly forthcoming with information at the moment.

"He was one of my subs. I don't see him anymore. He made his choice to leave about a year and a half ago." Miles shrugged it off. "Now, how about you get back to those slides and finish them up for me would you. I'd like it done today if possible." Miles said getting up from the couch and walking back over to his desk. Apparently, that was the end of their conversation. The way Miles seemed to shut down any further discussion led Alex to believe there was more to it than he was willing to let on.

Any further questions he had sat unanswered in the back of his mind until later in the evening. He'd gone home after finishing up with Miles for the day and was sitting in the kitchen with Alexa. Both of them had spoons stuck into a container of ice cream they were sharing. "Miles would probably be upset with me if he knew that I was eating ice cream for dinner. I'm supposed to be taking better care of myself."

"Well, what Miles doesn't know won't hurt him. I can't believe you actually want him to be your Dom. I thought you wanted someone to love you." Alexa commented as she dug out another frozen spoonful.

 

"I do, but in the meantime, it's nice to be getting some sort of attention and he's helping me to gain experience." Alex shrugged.

"I just want to tell you right now Alex. If you're going into this with the notion that you could be the one to change him then you need to give that up right now. It's never going to happen. I'm sorry if that's harsh, but it's the honest truth." Alexa doesn't want to see Alex get his hopes up that maybe Miles could fall for him when she knows that it would take a miracle to make Miles Kane truly love anyone.

"I know that. You don't need to warn me. I know because I'm younger you all think that I need to be looked out for, but I'm eighteen. I'm an adult and perfectly capable of making my own choices about who I want to spend time with." Alex said. " I like being around him" There's a lull in their conversation for a moment while Alexa is checking something on her phone and Alex is trying to pick out the chocolate bits that he likes from the ice cream. After a moment he does speak again. " I met Owen today." He mentions in a way that is intended to sound casual.

"What? How? I thought you were at work." Alexa said, finally looking up from the screen in her hand.

"I quit my job at the diner...or well, Miles quit it for me. He didn't like the way I was being treated so he did something I should have done weeks ago. Now I've got to find something new, but I'm actually grateful that he did it." Alex told her.

" I'm not surprised, that sounds like Miles alright," Alexa said, rolling her eyes.

" Aaaaanyways." Alex drags out his words. " I went back to the studio with him and he gave me a project sorting out slides which is soooo tedious. I actually have to go back and finish it tomorrow. I think we were both under the impression that it could be done in a day which turned out to be a ridiculous notion. So while I was over there this afternoon Owen came in looking for Miles. He was freaking out and behaving really strangely. Miles says that it's because he's on drugs."

"Yeah," Alex said flatly. " A lot of them, and his behavior has a shit effect on Miles. I told him time and time again if he keeps letting Owen back in he's never going to help himself, but Miles constantly takes pity on him."

"Miles says that you gave up on Owen. That everyone except him did... Owen mentioned something though that sort of peaked my interest." Alex said.

"Oh, and what was that?" Alexa asked. She honestly has no idea where this conversation is leading them, but her fears that it may take a turn for the worst are confirmed when Alex speaks again.

"Who's Eugene?" Alex asked.

"Did you ask Miles?" Alexa asked, trying to gauge how much Miles has actually told Alex.

"He just said that he was a submissive that left and now they don't talk. Something about the way he said it, though. I feel like there's more to it than that. He'd even said this morning that if Jay or Owen were to leave him that they would probably still remain close." Alexa is conflicted. On the one hand, it might be a good thing for her to be honest with Alex because he knows that Miles won't be. On the other hand, if there are things that Miles doesn't want Alex to know then who is she to tell him. Eventually, she lands on the decision to tell Alex anyways.

" If he asks, then I told you nothing, alright?" Alexa sighed knowing this probably isn't the best idea. " Eugene is Miles Ex-boyfriend."

"Like.... an actual boyfriend? I thought Miles didn't do the whole love thing?" Alex was a bit confused.

"He doesn't but Eugene was the exception to the rule. Or rather Eugene is the reason for the rule. Their relationship was a bit strange really. They were only monogamous for about a year out of it which oddly enough Miles was the one that insisted on it. I think he got tired of sharing. Eugene was a bit of a playboy, just like Miles. He liked to play with other subs. Miles was fine with it at first, as long as he was the only Dom. That and I don't think Miles wanted to give up his own lifestyle, but seeing the boy he loved with so many other people struck a nerve that Miles didn't know he had. So he made monogamy one of their rules." Alexa explained.

"And he could just do that? He could make choices like that without Eugene being a part of it?" Alex asked.

"Usually no but, Miles and Eugene's relationship was different than how he treats other submissives. See, they had what was called a Total Power Exchange. For about three years Eugene lived here with us and Miles had control of everything he did all day every day. When he was allowed to sleep, what he wore, what he ate, where he went, who he was with. He gave Miles the power to take his free will from him entirely. It's something that is seen as being controversial in the scene because the submissive gives up the right to have a safe word, but it was what they both wanted. Eugene said it was the only way he could express his limitless trust in Miles. Then one day he just left. If Miles knows why he won't say. Last I heard Eugene had gone to California but no one is really sure where he is. It destroyed Miles completely when he left so we usually still steer clear of the subject."

"Wow, that's heavy. I probably shouldn't have asked. It was intrusive of me." Alex said, looking down at the ice cream that had started to melt.

" Like I said, just don't tell him that I told you alright?" Alexa warned putting the lid back on the ice cream.

Downtown Miles sat in his apartment, located on the floor above his studio. He sat on the couch with an oatmeal colored box in his hands, it was the same one he'd thrown out earlier. In front of him on the table was a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels and a glass with two fingers worth of caramel colored liquor in it. He pulled another slide from the box, holding it up to the light to reveal the image. He could easily have gotten his projector to look at the images properly, but then he would have to admit to himself that he actually wanted to look.

He sighed, replacing the last slide into the box and removing another as he heard the front door slide open. "Are you done with your new twink for the night?" He heard Owen's voice ask.

"He went home a while ago," Miles said without turning to acknowledge Owen. " Have you sobered up now?"

"A bit," Owen said, coming to sit next to Miles on the couch.

" You were in quite a state earlier," Miles commented, pulling another slide from the box, still busy examining them rather than making eye contact with the man next to him.

"Looks like you've been busy since the new kid on the block left," Owen said, resting his head on Miles' shoulder in an attempt to look at the slide. "Oh my god, I forgot your hair used to be that long. Is that Eugene?" he giggled, rubbing his nose with his sleeve.

"Alex found these when he was organizing my slides. I thought I'd gotten rid of them by now." Miles shrugged Owen's head from it's resting place.

" You're awfully cold tonight," Owen said pulling away and reaching into his jacket pocket. He pulled out a small vial and shook a small amount of the powder it contained onto the back of his hand snorting it. " You want a bump? It might help you be less grumpy." Miles didn't speak, he merely took the bottle from Owen, taking a bump the same way Owen had only moments before.

Owen took Miles actions as a sign that he was finally going to get what he wanted and stood up from the couch, he pulled his shirt off over his head as he felt the speed starting to course through his body. He started making his way towards Miles' bedroom, shedding clothing as he went. He stopped in the doorway to look back at the man still moping on the couch. " Aren't you going to come fuck me now?"

"Yeah... I'll be right there."


	5. Mistaken for Strangers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally started to occur to me that maybe I shouldn't be posting the same notes here that I do on Wattpad because it won't make much sense. Soooo a couple things on this end. I know these updates seem to take a lot of time between. That's because I'm working on other fics at the same time that aren't yet posted here, but I intend to change that.   
> In the next couple days, I intend to put up Aviation here in its entirety (which will take forever so I'm procrastinating on it.) Aleo later tonight or tomorrow I have a short fic called Red ( it was supposed to be a one-shot but I decided to do a second chapter) That I'll post on here as well. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this. Any and all feedback is appreciated <3 thanks.

Alex stood examining himself in the mirror, he wiped under his eyes again to make sure he hadn't smudged any of his eyeliner while he'd been putting it on. When he was satisfied that there were no stray marks anywhere on his porcelain skin he leaned downto pull up his socks that came to just over the knee. He wanted to look nice today for Miles. Maybe he would be able to entice Miles into another lesson if he played his cards right. He'd put on a black and white striped tank top, with black shorts and black over the knee socks with white stripes at the top with sneakers. He thought he looked good, but he couldn't get his hair to cooperate with him so he pulled it back. With it up it looked short again like it did when he was younger which he wasn't fond of, but there wasn't much of a choice unless he wanted to be late. Miles had made it clear that being late was unacceptable.

"Well well, you're up early," Alexa commented. She was lounging on the couch in her bathrobe with the TV on. It was her day off and she was planning to do absolutely nothing other than catch up on her shows.

" I told you last night. I'm going to see Miles. I still have work to do." Alex said.

"Right, work. Ok." Alexa smirked.

"I'm organizing things in his studio," Alex whined.

"Which is why you're going over there looking so cute. I'll have you know Miles is very fond of knee socks." Alexa laughed.

"I know. I'm hoping that maybe..." Alex stopped looking down at his feet.

"You know it's ok if you like him right? It's fine to want his attention. You're spending quite a bit of time together that means he wants the same. Otherwise, he'd just blow you off. That's the sort of person he is. He wants you or he wouldn't bother with you." Alexa tells him. "There are no mixed signals with Miles."

"He didn't make a move yesterday." Alex sighed.

"That doesn't mean anything. Don't worry about it." Alexa shrugged. "He did stand up for you, didn't he? That should tell you what you need to know." Alex hadn't thought about it that way, but Alexa was right. Miles had got him out of something he'd resigned himself to. That man wouldn't stand for him being treated badly and he made that clear.

He thought about it all the way downtown on the train. Maybe he was putting more weight on the sentiment then he ought to, but he'd never had someone take care of him like that. Miles likes him right? He at least enjoyed having him around. He must have some interest in him to want to be around him, didn't he? He'd rescued him from a horribly awkward situation the night that they had met. Then again the day before with frank. That twice that he'd had an impact on him outside the realm of his sexuality.

Sexually Miles was something that Alex had never experienced. Someone he could try new things with. Miles made him eager for those experiences. Already only a few days in he was craving more. He wanted to push his limits. Sure, sex he wasn't ready for yet. Everything else he wanted. He wanted as much as he could get as often as he could have it. He knew Miles was taking it easy on him, but his life had never been easy. Why should it be now? Challenges and hardship were what pushed Alex and he wanted Miles to give him all the challenges that he could handle. He wanted to let him know that but wasn't sure how to go about it.

He reached Miles' stop, getting off the train at eighth street and walking up to the studio a few blocks away. He knew the code by now, although he'd only been there a few times, to let himself in. When he got up to the studio on the third floor he was surprised to see that Miles was nowhere to be found. He walked around the space a few times calling his name before giving up and texting him.

'I'm at your studio where are you?' He tapped send and sat down on the couch. He doesn't receive a reply. Instead, he's met with a very haggard looking Miles in sweatpants and nothing else walking through the door. He sighed and rubbed his head.

"Alex... What are you doing here." He asked, agitation evident in his voice.

"You told me to be here at nine. You wanted me to finish up organizing your slide." Alex said. He was supposed to come today, right?

"Right... right I did say that didn't I. Fuck." Miles sighed looking back in the direction of the elevator. He needed to go back up and get Owen out of his house before he stole anything to sell for drug money. He really shouldn't be left alone. Especially since he was still up.

"Do me a favor go over to Reggio's a couple blocks away and pick us up coffee would you?" Miles asked. It's less of a question and more of a command as he goes to his desk and pulls out a ten dollar bill. "I like mine with two cream, nothing else," He adds. "and get yourself whatever you like."

"Um... ok," Alex says taking the money from Miles. "Where is-"

"Walk down to the park and go up MacDougal, it's just past third street. It's the green building. It shouldn't take you long to get there, but you don't need to hurry. When you get back come upstairs here's the key to unlock the fourth floor on the elevator." Miles said, pulling out a small brass key from his pocket.

"What's on the fourth floor?" Alex asked.

"Do you always ask so many questions. Fuck it's annoying." Miles muttered mostly to himself. He doesn't mean it. He's just agitated, tired, and finally coming down after a night of hard drugs and angry sex.

"S-sorry," Alex muttered walking towards the door. " I can just come back later or tomorrow if you want."

"No, Al it's not you. I'm just..." Miles sighed. " I live upstairs. So that key is to my apartment. Come on up when you get back." He said watching the boys retreating back. "Al?"

"Hm?"

"You look good, just so you know," Miles says, forcing a smile. Just because he's out of sorts this morning doesn't mean it's alright for him to be cross with Alex. The boy has done exactly what he asked of him.

It doesn't take long for Alex to run to the coffee shop and get their drinks. It may well be one of the best cups of coffee that he's ever had before. He made a mental note to remember where it was. He'd have to make sure he took Nick there at some point. He takes his time walking back, going through Washington square park. Although it's early the park is already bustling with people. He takes a moment to sit on a bench just past the arch and watch them but leaves soon after for fear of returning with cooled coffee.

Alex lets himself into the building and puts the key in the lock on the elevator panel. He turns it and it allows him to press the button or the fourth floor. It illuminates, taking him up to his destination. He soon finds himself in the entry way of Miles' flat. The apartment is fairly minimalistic with a sort of sixties flair that seems like it would be suiting to a man like Miles. Alex walks into the living room seeing that there is broken glass and several other items of questionable origins scattered about. A familiar item catches his eye along with the debris. It's the box of slides he'd seen Miles discard the day before. It now rested open on the table.

He noticed that Miles was fast asleep on the couch. Alex wondered if he should wake him or simply leave the coffee and head back downstairs to get started on the slides. He decides to make his way over to Miles, kneeling down next to him and giving his shoulder a light shake. " Hey, I got coffee."

Miles opens his eyes and look at the boy in front of him. "Baby... You came back." He mutters.

" Of course I did, you just sent me for-" Alex's statement is cut short by a pair of lips on his own. They're hungry and desperate in sharp contrast to when they had been sweet and comforting the only other time that they had kissed. Miles slid off the couch, pushing Alex down onto the floor and positioning himself on top of him. His hand is starting to slide its way under the waist of Alex's shorts when the younger man finally speaks up. He's becoming increasingly uncomfortable with this situation.

"Miles..." Alex muttered, letting out a slightly scared whine. It's at this point Miles notices that the voice doesn't match the face that he thought he had seen. He looks under him at the boy he's got pinned down and immediately pulls back upon seeing that it's Alex.

"I'm... I'm so sorry Alex, I thought you were-"

"It's ok it doesn't matter who you thought I was..." Alex says getting up off the floor and brushing himself off. Eugene, Miles thought he was Eugene. Suddenly Alex is starting to question whether or not he should even be there. Is Miles trying to use him as some sort of replacement to heal his broken heart?

"I really didn't mean to make you uncomfortable," Miles said. Truth be told Alex might have enjoyed it if he was the one Miles thought he was kissing, but it hadn't felt right.

"It's ok... Really." Alex said, nervously rubbing his arm. Miles does enjoy having Alex around and seeing him already starting to close in on himself is worrying to him. He doesn't want Alex to shy away, or worse, stop coming around all together so he decides this might be a good time to be honest with him.

"Look, I had a really rough night last night and I'm coming down off a lot of drugs... that's no excuse, but my brain isn't running at full capacity right now. I need some sleep. Why don't you go ahead back downstairs and start on the slides? I'm going to nap a little longer and I'll meet you down there alright?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir," Alex says in a quiet voice before shuffling off back to the elevator and heading downstairs. Miles sighed feeling awful about what he's just done and hoping it doesn't do too much to tarnish their relationship. He'll figure out what to do about it once he's had some sleep.

A few hours later Miles has gotten some rest, had a shower, finally puts proper clothes on rather than walking around topless, and has a peace offering in hand when he heads down to the studio. He finds Alex laying on the floor on his stomach, sorting through stacks of slides. Miles' laptop is blasting the Beatles which Alex is singing along with as he kicks his feet against the hardwood floor. He obviously hadn't heard Miles enter over the music or he no doubt would have made some indication that he had. Miles makes his way over to his desk and turns down the speakers. "Brought you something." He says, causing Alex to nearly jump out of his skin. He sits up quickly and turns around to face Miles.

"S-sorry. It was too loud, wasn't it? I knew it was too loud. I'm sorry." He said blushing a deep shade of pink.

"Nonsense you're fine. There's no need to apologize." Miles said putting down the plate and cup that he's been carrying. "It's me who should be apologizing to you."

"For what? This morning? All you did was kiss me!" Alex said.

"I haven't been very nice to you today, and what I did was selfish. I don't want you to think that I'm like this. This isn't how I treat people, especially my submissives." Miles sighed. " I made you a sandwich, come eat," he added.

" You think you can win my affection back with food?" Alex joked, getting up off the floor and making his way back over to Miles and biting into the sandwich he made him.

"It's part of your rules. You need to be eating properly." Miles said, petting Alex's hair.

"You're going to make me fat!"

"I'm going to make you healthy. By the time we get to more... intense activities I don't want to have to worry about breaking you. Say we try something like suspended rope bondage in the future. I don't want you to end up snapping a rib," Miles said, pulling Alex's hair out of its ponytail and letting it fall. He looks far too much like Eugene with it pulled back. It's making Miles uncomfortable.

"Hey! No! I'm having a bad hair day!" Alex complained.

"Nonsense. Your hair looks lovely." Miles said running his hands through it and moving it around some. " There, perfect. Finish that sandwich, and then there's somewhere that I want to take you."

"I'm not finished with the slides yet," Alex confessed.

"I'm not worried about that right now. Consider this my apology for the way I behaved earlier. Besides, your rules Alex. You do have to explore somewhere new every week." Miles pointed out.

"Ok... New places make me nervous though." He admitted biting his lip.

"You know that's not true Alex. You came to New York all on your own," Miles said. " You need to stop reinforcing the negative ideas in your head if you want to make any improvements in your life."

"It was come here or be left alone without Nick," Alex sighed.

"But you had your own reasons for coming. You already told me that. Now c'mon lets get going." Miles insists

Alex stays glued to Miles side as they make their way through the village and up towards midtown. "Miles... where are we going." Alex complained grabbing on to his arm.

"It's not too much further Alex, don't complain. I think you're going to like it when we get there. You know, we're not that far from the club where you and I first met. You should be more accustomed to this neighborhood." Miles said, putting an arm around Alex's shoulder as they walked. He seemed to relax a bit at the gesture.

" It looks different in the day time... and last time I was over this way I was drunk." Alex laughed.

"Mmm, you're underaged Alex," Miles said sternly.

"Only here! I'm not back home! You know that the drinking age being twenty-one in the states is ridiculous." Alex rolled his eyes.

"Although I agree with you I don't want you drinking anymore. From here on out you aren't allowed to drink unless it's something that I give you." Miles said thinking it over. "With the exception of when you're with Alexa and you asked me for permission first."

"But what about with Nick!" Alex asked.

"If he's with you and Alexa than that's fine, again you must ask for permission. I don't want you going out to those horrible NYU bars where something could happen to you." Miles says. "If there's something special going on you can ask for permission, but it might now always be given. Do you understand Alex?" Miles asked.

" Yes,sir," Alex said. He doesn't really mind the new rule. Quite the opposite, the more Miles takes control of his life the safer he's starting to feel in the man's care. It's an odd trait that Alex never thought that he had.

"Once you're twenty-one, if you're still in my care this rule will expire. If you're of age and want to sit and have a couple drinks on your own then I won't stop you." Miles said. "While you're underage, however, it's my job to limit your alcohol intake as a way to keep you safe."

"Ok," Alex said nuzzling himself into Miles side as they walked until they came to a stairway on the street corner.

"We're here," Miles said.

"Where um... Where is here?" Alex asked, following Miles up the stairs.

"The High Line! You see, this place used to be a part of the West Side Railway Line. A while back they started turned the remnants of the line into an above ground park." He tells Alex. Alex is a bit shocked when they reach the top of the stairs. When Miles had said that it was an old train line he'd been expecting something different. It was surprisingly green with bits of the old railway tracks left intact. Being that it was early spring the green spaces were filled with blooming flowers since it was early spring. Something about it reminded Alex of home in a way that excited him to no end.

"Wow! This is cool!" Alex exclaimed as he finally stopped clinging to Miles.

"It is, and it will take us all the way back downtown!" Miles said. "Along the way, there's all sorts of street art and interesting architecture. You even get to walk along the Hudson river for a bit. It's without a doubt the most unique park in the city. Alexa and I have done a number of photoshoots up here over the years. Even during the winter when the greenery dies and it covered by snow it's still beautiful." Miles tell him.

"So, let me get one thing straight. We went for a walk, to take a walk through a park?" Alex asked.

" Well, you've told me that you have a lot of excess energy. I thought it might wear you out some." Miles laughed.

"True, but I could think of other ways you could to that," Alex smirked. Miles raised an eyebrow although he knows exactly what it is that Alex is implying.

"Not today Alex. If we're going to continue together I think it's important that we spend some time getting to know each other better," Miles said. "The more we start to connect the better able I'll be able to anticipate your needs when we're in a scene. It also helps to know more about what you are hoping to gain from this relationship. Since I've given you your rules you have some idea of what my expectations for you are. This isn't just a one-sided conversation. I need to know what it is that you're going to expect of me as well." Not only that but there is something about Alex that Miles finds exceedingly interesting. He can't quite put his finger on what it is, but there is something special about that boy.

As they walk along through the park they make several stops. Miles tells Alex about various buildings or street art pieces along the route and Alex stops every few feet to take pictures of the flowers on his phone making a note to send them to Nick later. When they get down by the Hudson Miles decides it's time for a rest and sits down on one of the large wooden lawn chairs that overlook the river. "Alright, old man needs a break, let's sit down for a minute." He says as he scoots over and pats the stop next to him for Alex to sit down.

"You're not that old Miles." Alex giggles, sitting down anyways.

"After a night like last night, I sure feel like I am. I'm certainly not eighteen anymore that's for sure." Miles yawned.

"Soooo, what did you do last night then?" Alex asks trying to sound casual.

"Owen," Miles said bluntly.

"I thought you were upset with him yesterday," Alex said, fidgeting with the top of his socks and pulling them up some. He's nervous to ask the wrong thing. Miles has made it clear that he's not to ask personal questions, but he seems to be fairly open with him the last couple days. Still, he doesn't want to be bitten by another bout of Miles anger.

"I had a rough night, and he was there when I needed him to be. He just happened to be the right toy at the right time." Miles shrugged.

"Is that how you see him? Just a toy?" Alex asked. Is that how Miles see him as well?

"Only because he enjoys being objectified that way. He's a very specific type of submissive. He prefers humiliation, degradation, things of that nature. As far as he considers himself when we're in a scene he is nothing more than a piece of furniture in my home that I can use however I like. If he endures my torments he may earn the privilege of being a real boy again." Miles says.

"Oh, that sounds intense," Alex said. He doesn't like the idea of that. Not entirely anyway.

"It is. The practices Owen and I have are occasionally very taboo in nature. He's got an addictive personality. It was a good thing for him when it came to his music or hobbies because he could get interested in something new very quickly and dedicate himself to it fully." Miles said. "Then it became sex and drugs. Now he's a strung out call boy who needs more and more depraved things to get off." Miles sighed.

"Call boy? Like a prostitute?" Alex asked.

"Yeah, he can't hold down a job or a place to live so he does it to sustain his habits." Miles has tried to help Owen several times. He's offered him money and a place to live until he can get back on his feet but with the contingency that he gets help. "I've tried with him. I really have but he won't accept help. Part of me thinks he's just looking to see how far he can push it before it finally kills him. He tells me all the time that he's given up." he sighs.

"That's got to make you sad doesn't it?" Alex asked. Miles doesn't say anything, he just makes a noise. He doesn't want to admit to Alex that he up until recently had been on a fairly destructive path himself with the same intentions. He looks around where they're sitting noticing the bush next to them is in bloom.

"Some people just aren't meant to lead long lives." He says as he plucks away the dead bloom and drops it to the side. "some, on the other hand." He picks a fresher flower, it's an absolutely gorgeous lavender colored bloom. He knows he shouldn't pluck it from the plant but doesn't care. "Are vibrant and full of life and beauty." He reaches to tuck the flower into Alex's hair behind his ear. " Come, let's keep walking."

"Ok," Alex said, looking down at his feet to hide a smile as he gets up. His cheeks are pink from Miles gesture. Was this still a part of Miles apology? Was he just being nice because he felt bad or did he really mean it?

"I like it here," Alex tells Miles as they walk further down. "It's nice to see something green in all the gray."

"You live right next to Central Park! That's the largest park in the city. Your bedroom looks right at it." Miles laughed.

"Yeah, but I never go there... I've only been for a short walk through there with Alexa. I'm worried that I'll get lost and there are so many people! Nick and I are trying to find a time to go and explore it together, but he's so busy all the time with his classes and his new friend Andy. I think they're dating or they're going to start dating, but Nick won't tell me for sure. He does like him. I know that much."Alex rambles on.

"Oh? Have you met this Andy?" Miles asked.

"Yeah, remember the one I told you made me feel like a third wheel? That was Andy. He's very nice but it's obvious that Nick is his type and I'm not. That's fine, they have a lot more in common anyway and my look isn't for everyone. I know that!" Alex said.

"You're a unique sort of boy that's for sure," Miles said smiling at Alex.

"Am I your type then?" Alex asked.

"Alex, do you want to know what my type is? Men. I like Men. Men who are well groomed, with their own perspective on style, who take care of their bodies." Miles said

"So basically men like you?" Alex giggled. "Sorry, guess I'm not the most fashionable of the people you hang around with." He added, thinking about to the night that he'd met Miles and the way that he had been dressed.

"You're sense of style is different. More androgynous and youthful which I like. You'll grow into it with time. Alexa will help with that I'm sure." Miles laughed. "Don't be so quick to discredit yourself, Alex, you're very good looking."

"Thank. You are too, but I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that for you to know it." Alex said.

"It's still nice to hear on occasion," Miles smirked

They continue to walk and talk for a while, their banter becoming playful like two old friends. Miles would tell Alex about parts of the city as they passed or how he once met the artist who painted this or that. He'd mention clubs or restaurants that were good that were along the route and tells him the story of how he almost bought an apartment right next to the park but had worried about people peering into the windows and seeing him involved in potentially questionable activities. Alex would come back with some sarcastic remark or a joke. Occasionally he responded with genuine interest. Either way, there was something easy about the flow between them when they were simply enjoying their time together. There was no pressure on their interaction which seemed to put Alex at ease. There was an odd sort of connection between the two of them that made Miles more comfortable and open than he would have been otherwise. He found himself talking to Alex the same way that he would Jay or even... No, it was nothing like that.

"And that's why they call it the meatpacking district." Miles finishes his brief history of yet another neighborhood.

"Oh good. I mean that's terrible for the animals, but I thought it was going to have something to do with... you know." Alex giggled.

"Actually the meatpacking district plays a very important role in the early days of the New york city gay and BDSM scene. This was back in the seventies so most of those places are no longer around but some of them still remain. Maybe that's a tour we should take another time. I know you've said you faced a lot of adversity growing up where you did Alex, but you and I are both fortunate to have been born in generations where there is a growing acceptance of the LGBT community. For instance. I can do this-" Miles pauses to lace his fingers with Alex's. "Without having to worry who sees. We can't be arrested for me simply wanting to kiss you or show affection in a public place. Sure, it might turn a few heads with those that are a little stuck in the past. Not everyone is going to like us, but with every day that passes we move a little closer to equality and acceptance." Miles explained.

"I guess I never felt like that because it's not like that where I'm from. All it ever got me was..." Alex rubs his shoulder subconsciously and sighs. "It's been nothing, but pain. I know I can't change who I am and I don't want to. That's why I came here. New York is supposed to be more progressive but-"

"But then you happen to walk into the one diner that has an absolute twat for a manager." Miles rolled his eyes. " We can't let people like him continue to spread their ignorant hatred and think it's acceptable. There are more people in this city that would see what he's doing wrong then think there's anything wrong with you. That's as it should be and the more we meet this bigotry with understanding and a willingness to educate rather than fighting it with the same belligerence the other side would the more progress we make. When they won't listen then you have to know when to simply walk away."

 

Alex knows he must have the goofiest smile on his face, but he couldn't help it. "You're so smart Miles." He gushes over him, causing Miles to laugh.

"Well, I make a point to know what I'm talking about when it comes to the issues that are important to me," Miles said. "And being a gay man LGBT rights and their history are topics I follow very closely." He adds as he leads Alex to a set of large, wooden, theater-like steps. In front of them sat a set of four large windows that overlooked the street. "This is possibly my favorite place on the High Line. Miles said, taking a seat in front of the window.

"It's pretty neat," Alex admitted.

" I used to sit here for hours to just think and watch the cars go by. Sometimes I like to pick a color and see how many I can count." In truth Miles used to come here all the time with Eugene. Eugene wasn't really a fan of the High Line. He always insisted that if he wanted to go to a park he wanted it to be one that they could play football in. The High Line was far too linear or that. Even on the small lawn that they did have, it was so crowded that there was absolutely no room for such activities. This, however, was the one spot he did enjoy. He said it gave him a new perspective on the city, that and Miles loved it, so he learned to love it too. As a matter of fact, Miles had brought Eugene there on their first real date...shit was he doesn't the same thing with Alex? Was this their first date?

In an odd way, Miles did date his subs. He often would take Jay out or Owen back in the beginning before he'd driven himself off the edge. It couldn't be all play all the time. They needed to have a strong bond and friendship between them in order to strengthen their dynamic and develop trust. In that way, he did date them, but it was never dating in the traditional sense with the end goal of having a romantic relationship. Miles doesn't do relationships, he won't make that mistake again.

He looks over at Alex who is gazing out the viewing window to the street below. " I choose yellow." He says as he glances back at Miles with a smile on his face.

"If you pick yellow you're going to count nothing but cabs and there are tons of those. Pick something else." Miles laughed, trying to break away from what he had previously been thinking. The only reason he's seeing the similarities today is because he's spent all night on drugs thinking about nothing but his partner who had abandoned him. Alex was nothing like Eugene. Alex was like Alex and that was fine.

"Fine then! White!" Alex said.

"In that case, I'll take black," Miles said.

" No fair! Cabs can be black too! You'll get way more than I will!" Alex complained.

"Fine then. If you want to count cabs we'll count cabs but don't complain to me when it's too hard to keep track." Miles shrugged.

An hour or so later Alex finally became flustered enough to give up and Miles decided that it was time for them to go back. It was starting to get dark after all and he didn't want Alex getting cold out there in just shorts and a tank top. From the very end of the High Line, it doesn't take them long to get back to the village.

"You want to come up for a bit?" Miles asked.

" Um, sure why not?" Alex shrugged trying to seem indifferent about it although deep down he doesn't want to go home yet. He's enjoying their time together.

"You don't have to sound so excited about it." Miles laughed, holding the door open for Alex.

When they get off the elevator they're met with something that Alex sure wasn't expecting to see. It was Jay sitting on Miles couch with tears in his eyes. As soon as he saw Miles he sprung up from the couch and ran over to hug him. "Thank god you're ok." He muttered. "Owen told me how bad last night was for you and then you weren't answering your phone and-" He doesn't say anything else.

"Sssh, Jay calm yourself please," Miles said wrapping his arms around him. "Everything is fine. I was just out with Alex and I forgot to take my phone with me. There's no need to worry."

"You know you can call me when you're having a breakdown like that. I would have been here for you. I love you Mi. I'm always here." Jay insisted.

"I'll uh, I'll give you two a minutes to um..." Alex shuffled his feet nervously. It's only then that Jay notices that Alex is there. Alex who has been with Miles all day apparently. He narrows his eyes but doesn't say anything.

"Go downstairs and finish up those slides," Miles says, his attention is now fully on Jay whereas moments ago he and Alex had been laughing and having a good time. Something about the switch makes Alex slightly jealous although he knows that he shouldn't be. He has to understand that there are other people who are going to want Miles attention too. That's more apparent than ever with Jay wrapped around Miles with the other man tries to calm him.

Alex is downstairs almost an hour before he hears the elevator door slide open, he's expecting to see Miles but instead, he's faced with Jay when he turns around. His hair is messy, his lips are bitten and swollen, and there are fresh red hickeys on his neck. It's obvious that he and Miles just had sex. "Miles said to send you back upstairs." He said bluntly.

"Right... I'll just um-"

"Look, kid-"

"Alex, I have a name. It's Alex, and you know that." Alex said.

"Doesn't matter. I don't think it's any secret that I don't like you. I love Miles I away that you're not capable of because you're still a child, but that's not the reason I came down here to talk to you... Look you seem nice enough and all, but you're only going to cause problems. It's no coincidence that you come along and then Miles has the first complete meltdown that he's had in months. He'd gotten himself cleaned up and stable again, but then you waltz in a fuck up everything Matt, Alexa, Jeff and I have been trying to do for the last year and a half. If you have a single ounce of decency in you then you'll stay away from him." Jay says. "I love him and I don't think I can watch him destroy himself again."

"I-I haven't done anything I really haven't!" Alex tried to insist.

"All you have to do is exist. You seem to be incredibly naïve Alex so I'll be blunt. He's using you as a replacement for something he lost and it's not healthy." Jay said before turning to leave.

Alex debated for a moment if she should take Jay seriously or not. Most likely he was just trying to get into Alex's head so that he would no longer be competition right? Surely that had to be his motivation there was no way that anything Alex had done was actually hurting Miles... Somehow he couldn't help but think about what had happened earlier that morning. Either way, he had been told to go back upstairs and he wasn't about to deny something Miles had commanded him to do. He pulled the key that he still had from earlier from his pocket and turned the lock.

"Miles?" Alex called out to him. When he'd walked in there was no sign of him anywhere.

"Bathroom," Miles calls back. Alex tries to figure out where his voice is coming from but falls short.

"I don't know where that is!" Alex shouted back.

"Right, it's ok I'm done anyway," Miles said as he walks out with just a towel around his waist and his hair still soaking wet so it clung to the sides of his face. " Make yourself at home. I'll be right there."

Alex took off his sneakers, leaving them by the door and sat on the couch to wait for Miles. He was going through this photos he'd taken earlier on his phone when Miles came out of his room in the same gray sweatpants that he'd been wearing that morning. He looked so good with them slung low around his hips that Alex was practically licking his lips already.

"You ok?" Miles asked asked. It looked like something was bothering the younger boy.

" Yeah just-"

"Can you help me with something fast? I think there are a couple shards of glass in my back and I can feel them but I can't reach them. It's been irritating me all day. Do you think you could help me get them out?"

"Only if you'll tell me how they got there in the first place," Alex said cocking an eyebrow.

"Owen threw a liquor bottle at me. It was already cracked so it shattered when it hit me..." Miles sighed.

"Why on earth would he do that?" Alex asked.

"To distract me from doing something incredibly stupid, because as crazy as he is Owen isn't the one one who get's a bit manic sometimes when we're together. Now I don't want to discuss it any further. I just had to explain the whole thing to Jay and I'd really prefer not to repeat it, especially to you." Miles said calmly. " Now would you please help me with this. I think they're somewhere in this general area." He added trying to reach but falling just short of the bruised and scabbed area on his back.

"Jesus Miles! You've just been walking around like this all day? Didn't it hurt." Alex asked.

"I didn't notice it until I was sober and believe me I've felt worse." Miles shrugged as he laid down on his stomach on the couch. Alex can easily see where the two shards are. They don't look very large but they must be painfull none the less.

"Do you have something to grab them with?" Alex asked, unsure that he would be able to use his fingers. Was this where all the broken glass that he'd seen this morning had come from?

"First aid kit is in the kitchen I think," Miles said. He'd patched up Owen the night before even in his drugged state but neglected to clean himself up. Owen didn't have the steadiest hand anymore and with all the speed in his system, he probably would have just made it worse.

Alex walked into the kitchen looking around for the kit that currently resided on the round oak table near the window. The things he saw next it though disturbed him. There was a glass pipe and a small bag of some sort of crystallized powder. Why did Miles still have drugs in the house? That was only something that he did with Owen right? Was it left over from the night before or was it something that he was intending to continue using. Alex snapped a picture and sent it to Alexa with a short message.

'This was on Miles table. Idk if it was because Owen was here or what...'

"Alex, did you find it?" Miles called out to him.

"Oh, Um yeah! Coming!" Alex replied grabbing the kit off the table heading back to the living room. He pulled a pair of tweezers from the box and tried gently to pluck the first shard out. It showed some resistance meaning that Alex had to tug it which he felt awful about doing. Miles didn't even flinch the pain isn't something that fazes him anymore. He'd rather have a swift tug to remove it than the constant dull ache of its presence. The second one is a little easier to come out. Alex then takes some peroxide and cleans the wound before applying a bandage to it. "There, all done!" He says.

"Thank you Alex. You're surprisingly good at that. You'd make a decent caregiver yourself." Miles joked. He sat up and reached for a shirt that was thrown over the back of the couch, pulling it over his head. " I think you've earned yourself a reward."

"Oh, like maybe another lesson?" Alex asked hopefully.

"Not tonight Alex, I'm still very tired." Miles sighed. "I was thinking how about I go pour us some wine and we watch a movie? Do you like The Pink Panther Movies?" Miles asked.

"Er... I don't think I've ever actually seen one before. You don't mean like the cartoon do you?" Alex asked.

" No Aly, I don't mean like the cartoon." Miles laughed, ruffling the boy's hair. "Wait here, I'll be right back," Miles says getting up from the couch. Alex can hear him fussing with something in the kitchen before Miles lets out an exasperated sigh. "God dammit Owen. I keep telling him not to leave his drugs where we eat." He groans Alex then hears the sink turn on and it sounds like Miles is washing something away. Maybe he was too quick to send that text to Alexa. Either way, he kept his mouth shut about it.

Miles returned soon after with two glasses of wine handing one to Alex. "Are you trying to get me tipsy Mr.Kane? After all the hell you gave me this afternoon about my underage drinking." Alex giggled.

"I little wine isn't going to hurt you and as far as I'm concerned you're of age back home so it's alright." Miles said, sitting down on the couch next to Alex. " Now it's time for you to meet Mr.Peter Sellers. The true Inspector Clouseau." Miles smirked as he turned on the movie.

"I thought that you said he was the Pink Panther!" Alex was very confused.

 

"No darling, the Pink Panther is a diamond. Now hush. Watch the movie." Miles told him nodding towards the television.

"Yes, sir." Alex nodded shutting his mouth.

Alex has absolutely fallen in love with the characters and storyline of the movie. He couldn't seem to stop his laughter and the wine, which had his cheeks flushed red, wasn't helping any. "You have quite the infectious laugh, Turner," Miles commented, pulling the smaller boy closer to his side and causing him to squeak although he cuddled in as soon as he'd settled down some. He waits a while before he tucks Alex's hair behind his ear and tries to lean in for a kiss which Alex dodges.

" Miles, I'm trying to watch the movie." He muttered turning his face away and fidgeting with the stem of his wine glass anxiously.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I'm just a little jumpy after this morning and...." Alex trailed off.

"And?" Miles inquired.

"Jay said some things to me before he left that-"

"Oh for god sake Alex, Jay is just being a jealous little twat. He's done nothing but whine and complain about you because he's used to being the golden boy. He didn't like that someone else had part of my attention the other night when we were at Shadow Play and now he's holding a grudge. Whatever he's put into your head I want to you know it's not true." Miles rolled his eyes. " I'll have to have words with him about that. It's so unbecoming of a submissive to be jealous. It's like a sibling being jealous of their younger brother."

"He said that I'm the reason you had a break down last night," Alex said, pulling away from Miles and looking down at his feet.

"Which is pure and utter bullshit and he knows it. I was feeling lonely, I did some drugs with Owen and things got a bit out of hand." Miles justified. " It's nothing to do with you."

"Why were you lonely?" Alex asked.

"I live alone." Miles shrugged as though that was an answer.

"Does it have something to do with the boy in that box?" Alex asked, pointing to the same small box he'd watch Miles throw in the trash yesterday. He'd noticed it that morning. "I thought you threw those away." Miles doesn't answer so Alex speaks up again. "Jay says you're using me to replace something you lost and it's not healthy. That's why you freaked out."

"Alex, would you like to know the truth?" Miles would normally not feel so open to sharing personal information with a new submissive, but the way his friends are already talking behind the boys back ( and directly to him in some cases) he figures Alex has the right to know.

"Please..." Alex muttered. Sure he already knows about Eugene thanks to Alexa but he wants to hear Miles side of the story.

"The submissive you asked me about the other day, Eugene. He's the boy in those photos. He's also my Ex. He's the only person I've ever truly been in love with and he absolutely wrecked me. One night when I was sleeping he just left... took everything with him except for his phone and I think that was intentional. He didn't leave a note, never made any effort to get in contact. He simply disappeared and I never knew why. It's not like we were even fighting. We were happy! I'd have married him! Hell, I'd already collared him which in our community is almost the equivalent of a wedding ring." Miles sighed.

"Jay wears a collar too. Does that mean you feel the same about him?" Alex asked.

"No, Jay has a training collar. There's a difference between wearing a training collar and actually being owned. Eugene's was metal. Silver to be specific and couldn't be taken off except with a screwdriver because they're supposed to be permanent. We had a collaring ceremony and everything."

"Oh, I didn't know there was more the one type of collar. Sorry, I'm still learning." Alex nodded.

"It's ok Alex, I don't expect you to know everything. That's why I'm here to teach you." Miles said pulling Alex closer to him again as he saw the boy realxing.

"Today didn't feel like teaching." Alex pointed out.

"Today was me apologizing, and I need to get to know you if I'm going to continue to be your Dom. I need you to feel safe and open with me so sometimes yes we're going to do things that have nothing to do with the kink world because that trust needs to be established. This morning I felt terrible about the way I acted toward you. I wanted you to see that that isn't me at all. The me that you saw this afternoon when we were together, that's me. That's the person that I really am." Miles tried to explain.

" I like that Miles, the smart, funny, kind Miles. Not the one who pins me to the floor cause he mistakes me for his ex-boyfriend..." Alex mutters the last part

 

"I know it doesn't excuse my behavior Alex, but I was coming down off a massive amount crystal meth, and yes that's what you saw I the kitchen don't act like you didn't. It's gone now I've put it down the sink. I did a ridiculous amount of it with Owen last night... I probably need to get rid of the needles in my room and clean up the sheets too. It was a setback and it's not going to happen again. I just tormented myself looking through that damn box and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why he left me. Why he didn't love me anymore so I turned to the one thing I knew I could, drugs and horrible destructive sex which Owen is a catalyst for." Miles knows that due to their drug use what he and Owen do breaks the bounds of the 'Safe, Sane, and Consensual' mantra, but Owen has never complained and it's a part of their dynamic. He could cause all the harm he wanted to that boy and Owen loved it. Things tended to get violent quickly, but one even brief mention of his safe word and Miles would never even under the influence of drugs continue. Owen though would never use that safeword. He would probably let Miles come close to killing him before he ever would, but Miles would never drastically endanger anyone else's life. He didn't have it in him.

"I did see it..." Alex admitted.

"It's really not who I am Alex." There's a pleading note in Miles voice that's asking him to believe his words as truth.

"I believe you, but I do want to know one thing." Alex sighed.

"What is it?" Miles asked.

"Are you using me as a replacement for Eugene?" He'd been wondering most of the day and what Jay had said only served to make him more insecure.

 

"No, of course not. The only thing similar between yourself and Eugene is that you're both young and you have a vaguely similar face structure if you squint. Mostly it's the nose, but really you look nothing alike, You sound nothing alike, and from what I've gathered about you so far your personalities are nothing alike. It's almost like ying and yang. You're more feminine and he's more masculine. You're shy and playful and he was opinionated and bratty. You're innocent and he was the absolute devil in disguise.... You're night and day. I don't enjoy spending time with you because you remind me of him, I like you because there's something magnetic about you. You've become this novel that I can't put down because I want to know more. Any way that I act towards you has nothing to do with him and everything to do with me wanting our trust to grow so I can continue to be a better Dom to you. Don't listen to what anyone else says because they don't know, but you know and I know. Does that answer your question?" Miles asked. Alex nods quickly

"Yes, sir."

"Good then come over here and give me a kiss will you?" Miles asked.

"Mhm," Alex mutters, climbing into Miles lap.

"Is Mhm a proper answer Alex?" Miles asks.

"No, sir," Alex smirks as Miles leans in to kiss him. It's different from that morning but more lingering than the first time they'd kissed. It starts off slow, their lips working against each other as Alex feels Miles start glide his tongue over his lower lip asking for entrance. Not being a very experienced kisser Alex lets Miles naturally take the lead. He keeps the place lazy and sensual. Their tongues don't need to fight for dominance because there's no struggle, Alex willingly submits to letting Miles explore his mouth occasionally drawing small moans from the smaller boy who not sat straddling his lap as they kissed.

They don't stop until the end credits are finished rolling and the movie has returned to its menu at which point Alex pulls away. His face is red as Miles has ever seen it but he's got the most genuine smile on his swollen lips. Miles can't help but lean in to kiss them one more time causing Alex to giggle. "You have a lovely smile Alex, did you know that?" He asked

"Thank you, sir." Alex giggled still making eye contact. He wants another kiss but isn't sure how to ask. He's absolutely giddy and high on the new sensation. They'd been making out for close to an hour if not longer at this point and both his brain and body are flooded with a strange new euphoria.

"Let me up. I've got something for you." Miles said. Alex lets himself fall back onto the couch looking up at Miles as he watches him walk away into the other room. A few moments later he comes back with a black box in his hands. " Go ahead and open it."

Alex gets the lid off of the box to see that there's a collar inside. The red velvet and leather one that he's pointed out at shadow play the other day.

" Miles!" Alex squeaked.

" Sukie dropped it by while we were gone this afternoon. Do you want to try it on?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir! Please! Can I?" Alex asked happily.

"You may," Miles said taking the collar from the box and putting it around Alex's neck. "Now this is less of a training collar like what Jay has and more of what they call a protection collar. You're to wear it when you come to Shadow Play, but that is the only time that it needs to be worn unless is specify otherwise. It may eventually become your training collar in which case your rules about when it needs to be worn would change." Miles tells him. "Right now it's purpose is to be a signal to other Doms that you are not to be approached or touched. Although we do have a very strong community, there are always going to be outsiders and I don't want you running around without it and letting someone thinking they can undermine me and try to play with you. It should also keep you out of a fair few awkward situations."

"I need to take a selfie to see it," Alex said, pulling out his phone to snap a couple of pictures. Miles noticed that he too ended up in the frame and leaned in doing a peace sign. "Sir, may I send this to Nick?" Alex asked.

"You may." Miles nodded as Alex, tapped out a quick message reading 'Look what Miles got me' with several hearts after it. "So do you like it?"

" I love it!" Alex squealed throwing his arms around Miles and causing them to both topple backward on the couch. "Thank you Miles! Thank you thank you thank you thank you." Alex repeated over and over kissing Miles face. Miles couldn't help but smile.

"Now Alex, I want you to know that by accepting this collar that means that you would like to continue your training as a submissive with me. It means will you fully under my protection from here on out and that I have decided to take you on as my second full-time submissive." Miles said. "I need you to be aware of a few things going into this. One there might be some backlash from Jay since he rather liked being the only one. If he gives you any trouble you are to let me know immediately understood?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir." Alex nodded.

"He'll be punished for it the same way that you will be if I see any negative behavior out of you towards him," Miles said.

"I understand," Alex confirmed.

"This also means from now on I won't be so lenient with your punishments. I've been clear about what I expect of your behavior and failure to comply with lead to appropriate punishment. We will still be taking things slow, but I'm going to start giving you more because I think you're capable of handling it." Miles said.

"YES SIR!" Alex wanted more. He wants so much more and knowing that fact that he's going to be pushed a bit harder makes him excited to no end.

"The last thing and I can't stress this enough Alex. You are aware that our relationship is that of a Dominant and submissive. I am not your boyfriend. I will never be your boyfriend and we are not in a monogamous relationship. That isn't something that is going to change and I need to know that you understand and are alright with this. There will be others that will come and go and you may not always have my full attention. You are also free to pursue other relationships as long as there are no other Doms in your life and your relationships don't interfere with your training. If I call I expect you to come unless you want to be punished and in return, I will try my hardest to be there when you need me too. This shouldn't be too much of a problem as our sessions will usually be scheduled in advance." Miles said.

"I-I understand sir." Alex nodded.

"Good, then I would like you to come to my Electricity class at Shadow Play on Thursday. If you comply with your rules until that time and I'm satisfied with your behavior at the event then I'll take you out clubbing with Alexa and I this weekend. Matt has an event on Saturday that I think you'll enjoy. Does that sound good?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir!" Alex nodded happily

"Good then. So do you accept this collar as a symbol of my protection and your status as my submissive?" Miles asked.

"Yes, sir! I understand fully and I accept." Alex smiled.

"Good boy Alexander," Miles said, running his fingers the boy's long curls and kissing his cheek. " It's getting late, let me get you a cab home. You need to be getting to bed."

"Can't I just stay here with you?" Alex asked.

" I don't think that's such a good idea just yet Alex." Miles said, "Get your shoes on I'll walk you out."

"Alex... Alllleeeex... ALEXANDER DAVID TURNER WAKE YOU ASS UP THIS INSTANT!" Alex hears a voice shout at him jolting him awake.

"Nicky what the fuck I was asleep!" He complains.

" I know... which I why I brought coffee because I love you," Nick, who for some reason is still shouting, said sitting next to Alex on his bed and handing him a cup.

"What are you doing here so early?" Alex asked rubbing his eyes.

"Early? It's 10:30 Alex. You were supposed to be at work an hour ago. Or at least I thought you were until I went to the diner and that nice lady what was here name?"

"Mary."

"Yeah, her. She said that you quit the day before yesterday. What's going on with you Alex? I don't hear from you for days and then you send me a picture of you with Miles wearing some sort of strange dog collar and find out that you've quit your job! I'm worried about you mate." Nick rattles off.

"Nick I'm fine I've just been a little busy the past few days and I haven't had much time to talk. I figured you were busy with class anyways." Alex says casually as he snaps a selfie of himself with his messy bedhead and the coffee cup.

'Morning Miles! Look Nicky brought me coffee <3' He sends it and quickly receives a reply that makes him smiles.

'Morning Alex, coffee isn't breakfast. Remember to eat something. You look cute.'

"What are you smiling about?" Nick asked.

" Miles says I'm cute, and that I have to eat breakfast. It's one of my rules. You hungry?" Alex asked getting up out of bed and pulling on a pair of underwear underneath his Beatles shirt that he's wearing. He doesn't mind Nick seeing him like this, it's not like he hasn't a million times before they've lived together for years and are fairly well acquainted with each other's bodies.

"Rules?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, it's a long story. Have you got time?" Alex asked as he walked to the kitchen with Nick following close behind.

" I've got all day. The only thing I have planned is meeting Andy for dinner later." Nick said.

" Yeah, how's that going?" Alex started rummaging through the fridge to think what he wanted to make.

"He's really great actually. I think things are starting to get a bit more serious you know? We're officially dating now which you'd know if you ever called." Nick jokes, but Alex turned to him with a hurt expression. " Aw, Al I didn't mean that. It's not like I know what's going on in your life either."

"Morning Al, hope I didn't wake you when I came in last night?" a groggy voice says from behind Alex He turns to see Alexa standing in the kitchen doorway in her shorts.

"You mean you weren't home?" Alex raised an eyebrow.

"I got in late. I was out with Matt and Jeff." Alexa yawned.

"Oh, I was over at Miles' and I just assumed that you were already asleep when I got back." Alex shrugged.

"No, I was going to text you and say I'd be late, but I left my phone at the first bar that we went to, luckily they have it so I can go and get it today. Matt and Jeff don't have your number so I wasn't sure how to get in contact with you. Thinking back on it I could have just texted Miles had I thought of it, but I had far too much to drink." Alexa admitted.

"Mmm ok, so then what do you want for breakfast?" Alex asked.

"Smoothies. Make smoothies, they should fit into your rules." Alexa said sitting at the counter next to Nick and waiting for Alex to start getting ingredients out. " Mango and orange, please. I think we have mangos on the bottom shelf," she added before noticing Nick. " Good morning Nick what are you doing here?" She asked.

"I came to check on Alex. He disappeared for four days and then he sent me this," Nick said showing her the picture. " I was concerned."

"A collar?" Alexa sounds shocked looking over at Alex. " He got you a collar!"

"Yeah, it's a nice one too. I said I liked it when we were at pleasure chest the other day. He said it's a protection collar, that he wants me to wear it to Shadow Play on Thursday and if I'm good then I can go to Matt's party this weekend!" Alex informed her. Nick is totally lost but Alexa seems to be understanding all of this.

"Wow he's not wasting any time with you then is he. This is huge Alex, do you understand what this means?" Alexa asked.

"It means I'm off limits to other Doms they're not allowed to approach me." Alex said smiling at the though. " Miles was very clear about what it meant last night."

"Dom? Miles is a DOM! I thought he was just a playboy." Nick said.

"No, he's that too. He likes to fuck all his little model types, but Miles real interests are in his sub boys. Those he keeps around for a while. Alex is one of four now." Alexa tells Nick.

"Two, one of two. Cause Jeff has his own subs and Owen is... I have no idea what Owen actually is. I know he was over with Miles night before last and things got kind of crazy. I actually sent you a picture of some drugs that were on the table but apparently they were Owen's and Miles got rid of them." Alex shrugged. " So ignore that, I jumped to conclusions."

"Did you see him get rid of him or did he just say he did because it might have been for show knowing that you were there. I'll have a talk with him about it later." Alexa said.

"Ok, slow down. Alex will you PLEASE explain to me what the hell is going on. I am SO confused." Nick complained as Alex started the blender.

"Right," He said as it stopped, pouring out three glasses. " It's simple really. The film Miles took of me was shown at a fetish film festival at a Bondage club called Shadow Play that Miles, Alexa, and their friends are all regulars at. I went to see the film with Alexa and was introduced to Jay who is Miles other submissive as well as some other people and Miles ended up winning. So then I saw him doing some things to Jay and well... I got interested I guess and thought that it might be something I wanted to try. So then I told him that night that I wanted to give it a go and he told me to come to his studio in the next day." Alex says handing both Alexa and Nick cups and leaning on the counter as he talked.

"So you asked him to be your Dom?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, in fewer words than that. So on Saturday, I went to his studio and he took me to this place called The Pleasure Chest to pick out a toy because that was part of my prize. He said he'd get my a vibrator, or any toy I wanted really if I won so I got this really cute little purple-"

"Hold on. Wait. Timeout. So then have you two... you know... done it yet?" Nick asked.

"Nick, if you can't talk about sex like a mature adult then you're not ready to have it yet." Alex rolled his eyes and Alexa laughed. It's only then that Alex realized those were Miles Exact words to him the other day or something to the same effect at least.

"Well have you?" Nick asked again.

 

"No, I haven't had sex with him yet and I'm not sure that I ever will. It's not a requirement of my training." Alex said simply. It's might be a lie, he's starting to think more and more that he probably will end up wanting to have sex with Miles even if for no other reason then he makes him feel safe when they're together. "But he has given me probably the best orgasms I've ever had in my life, no offense Nick."

"None taken." Nick shrugged it off.

"So he got me a vibrator, we came back here, negotiated my rules and then spent the evening with him showing me lovely ways to use my new toy. He stayed the night because he didn't want me to be alone then in the morning we went back to the village because I had work." Alex sighed. "Frank was being a cunt as usual. I've told you enough for you to know how he is. Anyways, Miles wasn't having it and he quit for me. Hauled me out of there. Then we spent the day together at his studio and I met one of his other subs Owen."

"Owen is a trainwreck." Alexa interjected.

"Miles says everyone else thinks that Owen is just a Junkie little fuck boy, but he won't give up on him because he has a soul." Alex countered.

"Don't be so quick to defend him. If you saw some of the things that Miles does to Owen you wouldn't think he had a soul still." Alexa rolled her eyes.

"He's told me some of it. I helped pull glass out of his back because Owen threw a bottle at him." Alex said with his hand on his hips.

"Just remember Alex, Miles is a smooth talker. You can't put your faith in everything he says. He's a snake and eventually, he's going to bite you." Alexa warned.

"He already did bite me. Yesterday morning when I went to his apartment and he thought I was Eugene because he was still high. I know I might look helpless to you Alexa, but I am capable of looking after myself." Alex snapped.

"It's true. He's actually tough as nails." Nick said.

"Then why were you so concerned about him?" Alexa asked.

"I'm his best friend it's my job to worry," Nick said. " Besides I wanted to make sure that Miles wasn't making him do anything against his will. If Alex is agreeing to it then you'll be hard pressed to convince him he's wrong. He's stubborn as a mule."

"No, Miles isn't like that he wouldn't do anything that Alex didn't want him to and I've known him long enough to at least say that with confidence." Alexa sighed. "Sometimes it's just how he gets people to say yes to things that I'm less alright with."

"Well, he's been nothing but kind to me. Yesterday he took me to the High Line. Then we went back to his place and well... Jay came by for a while I guess Owen told him some things that had gone on the night before and Jay was crying. He was scared that Miles might have been hurt because he couldn't get in contact with him. Jay, by the way, has made it very VERY clear that he doesn't like me." Alex continued.

"Oh yeah. I got an earful about that from Jay. You know I like you Al, but I do feel a bit bad for Jay. He loves Miles-"

"But Miles doesn't love him! He doesn't love me either and he's not going to so maybe Jay should just quit whining about it. Miles didn't think twice to comfort him or fuck him while I was downstairs in the studio! He's made it clear neither of us is Eugene and we're not going to work as suitable replacements because he doesn't want to let anyone else in." Alex said. He's starting to get agitated. Alexa seems a bit surprised by Alex's outburst.

"Did he talk to you about Eugene?" Alexa asked blinking at Alex.

"Yes! He came straight out and told me everything you did the night before and he told me, unlike what you all seem to think, he is NOT trying to replace him with me. I'm not some doppelganger crutch he's using and we're nothing alike! Now for god sakes, I'm happy. I'm actually happy! Stop trying to blow holes in it by telling me things you assume are true. I told you already I don't want to know. I'll draw my own conclusions and so far the conclusion I've come to is that I like spending time with Miles. Let that be good enough for both of you." Alex said. He wants to storm out of the room but he knows Alexa does have his best interests at heart.

"I'm glad you're happy but I thought you wanted someone to love you Alex. It's all you talked about before coming here." Nick said.

"It's not going to happen overnight, Nick. Until then it's nice to have someone around who does at least cares enough to pay attention to me." Nick is about to say something with Alex cuts him off. "And it's not about sex either. It's really not. I'm already learning so much from him. He was teaching me so many things yesterday about art, the city, and everything he says is just so intelligent. I feel like an idiot standing next to him." Alex admitted. " And... He calls me Aly." Alex can't help the smile forming on his face. "and last night after Jay left we he introduced me to the real Pink Panther and we made out on the couch through like half the movie. It was nice. I've never had something like that before and if it eventually hurts me then it hurts me, but just let me enjoy these things while I can cause it's better than anything I've ever had."

"I won't say anything more about it." Alexa conceeded.

"I'm just glad you're happy, but I have one question." Nick laughed.

"What?" Alex asked.

 

"When do I get to meet him?"


	6. Electric Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, no excuses this time. It just took forever because it's long as hell but this is really important so this chapter needed the extra time and effort to finish it. That and I was working on like 3 other things at the time that I started it. Then once I did get finished I forgot to post it on here too cause I'm not on AO3 as much
> 
> Aaaanyways, I hope you like this and maybe it will give you some insight into the direction of where this story is going to start leading as we explore more of the new fun kink elements. YAY FOR KINK. 
> 
> Also, I was thinking about this thing I might start doing not just on Shadow Play but on all of my stories. I was considering starting to do 'tracklists' at the beginning of the chapters with maybe 4-6 songs that set the tone for the chapter. I would be easy to do since I have ongoing playlists that I'm adding to as I write anyways. Is this something that you would like?

" Miles, please..." Alex whimpers into the sheets.

"Are you sure this is what you want Alexander?" Miles said, trailing his hands down his spine causing the boy to shiver.

"Mhm," Alex muttered.

"What was that?" Miles asked.

"Y-yes sir." Alex moaned as Miles slapped his backside for his mistake.

 

"Only if you're absolutely sure. You tell me if you want to stop, alright?" Miles asked as Alex hears the click of the cap on the lube. Alex Braces himself on his elbows as he feels Miles pressing against his entrance causing Alex to let out a whine.

"I am, I'm sure." He managed to get the words out as Miles starts to press inside of him causing Alex to ball his hands into fists, tugging at the forest green sheets on his bed.

"Fuck... Fuck." Alex cried.

"Sssh, it's alright, it will only hurt for a second baby boy," Miles said, running his hands over Alex's back and sides. "Relax, just let all the tension go."

It's just starting to feel good when... Alex's alarm wakes him up. He reaches for his phone, to turn it off. He then sighs wiping at the warm sticky liquid on his stomach. "Oh, goddammit!" He complained aloud. He picked up his phone hitting the last number in his face time recents and uses the reflection on his screen to fix his hair while he while it rings.

"Morning Alex," Miles said smiling at the boy on the screen. From the backdrop behind him, Alex can tell that Miles is still in his apartment, sitting at the kitchen table.

"Morning Miles." Alex yawns, rubbing this eyes with the back of his free hand in a way that is calculated to make him look cuter in his sleepy state. "I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time, sir." He says in a drowsy voice that he's putting on though he doesn't need to.

"Not at all. I was just reading the news and finishing my coffee. Did you just wake up?" Miles asked.

"Mh- yes, sir," Alex says. "I had a question I wanted to ask you."

"What is it, Alex?" Miles asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

"You said I wasn't allowed to cum last night," Alex said. Miles had kept him up half the night (not that he could go to sleep anyways ugh!) teaching him how to properly edge himself with his vibrator. Then he'd sent him to bed without letting him finish. He told him if he was lucky then he might be allowed after they left Shadow Play the following day if he behaved to Miles satisfaction. "What if I did, but it wasn't on purpose!" He added the last part quickly.

"What do you mean not on purpose?" Miles asked.

"I had a naughty dream," Alex whined, using his camera to show Miles the mess he'd made on his tummy before making an exaggerated frowning face at Miles.

"If you were more experienced I'd have you wearing a cage for that," Miles muttered.

"I couldn't help it! I was asleep! I didn't know I was actually gonna cum!" Alex tried to justified.

"What was the dream about Alex?" Miles asked.

"I don't want to tell you. I'm not comfortable saying." Alex admitted, looking ashamed.

"Alex, I'm going to have to insisted that you tell me. I need to know about what your fantasies are." Miles told him, the looks on Alex's face though makes his expression soften as he starts to put two and two together. "Having dreams about sex doesn't mean that you have to actually have sex Alex. The choice belongs to your waking mind, not your sleeping one." he tries to assure him.

"You were the one that I was having sex with. Sorry, it's embarrassing."Alex blushed.

"That's natural Alex and just because you've been honest with me about your dreams does not mean that it's something that I'm going to put pressure on your to do," Miles said. "However you still did cum without my permission and there will be consequences for that. I told you when you accepted your collar that I would be less lenient with you." Alex whimpered both with fear and slight excitement at the idea.

"When?" Alex asked.

"Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow. I haven't decided yet." Miles said. "I need to go Alexander. I'll see you at Shadow Play tonight. Don't be late." And with that, he hangs up leaving Alex looking at his own image in the phone screen.

Alex spends most of the afternoon getting hopelessly lost while looking for a new job. He returns home around five feeling utterly defeated. Alexa is already there and notices his glum demeanor when he walks in the door.

"Why the long face Al?" She asks, getting up from where she's sitting on the couch.

"Been job hunting all day. There's nothing really out there at the moment." He sighed. "Nothing that wants to hire someone like me at least." He hadn't dressed in any way that would particularly stand out today. Dark pants and a black shirt, but his more feminine mannerisms were something that couldn't be helped.

"Nothing up in this neck of the woods is going to hire without quite a bit of experience if you know what I mean. Nothing that's going to play you decently at least. But I do know of one opening." Alexa told him

 

"Oh? Where at?" Alex asked.

"My PA quit on me a few days ago. She's decided to run off with some boy and get married. I think it's an utterly stupid mistake but... young love, what can you do about it? I'm desperately in need of someone trustworthy and hard working." Alexa told Alex.

"That um... thank you but-" Alex sighs he's not sure if he wants to take the job or not. Again it's something that feels like it's being handed to him without earning it. "Just until you find someone new and I find something else." He nodded.

"Ok, but you have to promise me that if you're good at it then you'll stay." Alexa laughed. " Now what are you planning to wear to shadow play tonight?"

"I uuuuuh-"

"C'mon you can have a look in my closet," Alexa tells him, grabbing his hand and pulling Alex towards her bedroom.

Alexa had explained to Alex that weeknight class sessions were much more laid back than a normal play night so most people would be dressed fairly casually. Alex still wanted to pick out something cute that Miles would like. This time he had no problem with flat out saying that that was the reasoning behind it. "Do you think he'll like this?" He asked grabbing one of Alexa's plaid skirts.

"Probably, but don't you think that's a bit short for you?" Alexa asked.

"It's not like I won't wear underwear with it for at least most of the night." Alex shrugged. He's hoping at some point they'll get to come off but he's not sure what Miles has got planned for him if anything at all. He finally decided on a black and pink David Bowie shirt, a red plaid mini skirt with striped underwear, black knee high socks because Miles seemed to like them so much, and converse sneakers. The last thing to go on was his collar. Standing in the mirror examining himself with it on made him feel powerful. He liked the way it looked around his neck. He liked the slightly constricting feel of it. He liked that it gave him a sense of belonging. The last one was the part he was most fond of.

"Well don't you look cute!" Alexa said, smiling at Alex. He'd left his hair messy and kept his make-up fairly minimal just a bit of eyeliner and some blush. Not that he needed the blush as he found his cheeks to be perpetually red around Miles.

"Do you think he'll like it?" Alex asked, shifting on the balls of his feet a little unsure.

"He's not going to know what to do with you. He'll forget all about Owen." Alexa laughed.

"You think? I wish I had enough experience to help him with his classes." Alex sighed. "I'm sort of hoping that Jay isn't there tonight."

"He will be," Alexa informed him. " He always is, Miles is his Dom after all." She shrugged. "But if he starts bothering you then you need to tell Miles. He won't tolerate that petty bullshit from Jay. I promise you Jay is actually a good guy, he just feels threatened by you. He thought that now that Miles was over Eugene he would actually have a chance even though deep down he knows that it's not true. You've just upset his little fantasy is all. I'm sure he'll let it go eventually. Especially once you've learned enough for the two of you to be playmates."

"Me and Jay? Playmates? You can't be serious." Alex said looking a bit disgusted.

"Yeah, Owen used to play with him all the time before he went off the deep end. Even before Miles was technically Jay's Dom he used to come and join him and Eugene. Same with Jeff. The only thing more fun than one submissive is two!" Alexa laughed.

"I don't think I want to play with other subs." Alex huffed.

"That's because you're nowhere near ready for it. You'll change your mind, and if you don't, then just make it a limit" Alexa said as she grabbed her purse. "C'mon lets get going."

Alex thinks about what Alexa had said the entire cab ride to Shadow Play. Would Miles really make him play with other subs once he had more experience? Would he want to when the time came? Just because he knew he had to share Miles did that mean Miles could share him with others as well? The entire idea made him uncomfortable, but he figured that there was no use freaking out about something that hadn't happened yet and probably wouldn't for quite some time.

Miles class was supposed to start at six. When Alex and Alexa arrived it was quarter till and the man of the hour was still nowhere to be seen. The room is set up much differently than it had been the last time Alex had been to Shadow Play. Instead of the projector screen at the front of the room, there was what appeared to be a medical table. A few chairs scattered around, but mostly there were mats and rugs covering different areas of the floor. A few of them were already occupied by couples or small groups, but for the most part, everyone was still walking around socializing.

Alex's eyes quickly went to Jay who was standing in the corner, talking rather closely with a man who from far away looked like he could be the third Gallagher brother. He certainly had the hair for it. Alex was a little surprised to see Jay lean in to kiss the other man before pulling away with a smile and continuing their conversation as if it were totally normal. Jay seemed to notice Alex staring and glared back at him, turning the attention of the other man towards them. He smiles in their direction and waved. "Alexa!" He called out.

Alexa turned around.Spotting the two men she grabbed Alex's hand and dragged him closer. "Jay will you stop glaring, it looks like you're about to eat him and the expression does nothing for your face," Alexa said, putting her hand on her hip. Jay ignores her though staring at the collar around Alex's neck.

"I'm going to go find Miles." He says, walking away. As he passes him his shoulder intentionally collides with Alex's.

"Judging by his sudden change in behavior you must be Alex," the guy that Alex has in his head dubbed 'beautiful-almost-oasis-man' says to him. He meant to say hello but instead, just a giggling noise came out. He tried to cover his mouth with his hand to stop it but it was too late causing his face to turn a soft pink.

"Hi, hi, hello I'm Alex," Alex said when he pulled himself together. The other man is about to say something but there's a familiar voice from behind them.

"Now now Jeffery you can see that he has a collar on. You should know you're not allowed to speak to him without my permission." It says as a hand goes to Alex's hip. "Seeing as you no longer wear yours."

"M-miles!" Alex squeaked looking over his shoulder at him.

"But he's one of your boys, so it's all the in the family." Jeff laughed smiling at Miles and rolling his eyes.

"I'm only kidding," Miles says letting go of Alex and going to hug Jeff. "Al, I see you've finally met Jeff. Jeff this is my newest boy-"

"Alex, I know. Jay's mentioned him. He's off looking for you by the way." Jeff told him.

"Owen and I just got here. I was having a bit of trouble with my wand when we did our test run earlier so I popped by pleasure chest to pick up another one on the way here. The chord was shorting out, can't have that happening in a class!" Miles sighed. It's only then that Alex notices Owen standing behind Miles. He's got on the high, rigid leather collar that Miles had bought the other day. What did he call it again? A posture collar? As well as a pair of skinny jeans and an orange t-shirt. Today his hair is clean and brushed into place. The bags under his eyes are gone, his pupils are normal sized. To be honest he looks like a totally different person and Alex finds him rather attractive now. Owen catches Alex staring and smiles.

"Hey, Alex right?" He asks. Even his tone and mannerisms are entirely different. "I uh, I think I owe you an apology for what happened the other day. I wasn't myself if you know what I mean." He says rubbing the back of his neck. "I think we got off on the wrong foot and if it's ok with you I'd like to start over. I'm Owen."

"Hi Owen," Alex says. He's about to say something else when Jay comes back over.

"Miles!" He chirps happily, his mood vastly different from the way that it had been only minutes before. He quickly hugs the other man, nuzzling his shoulder and waiting for a kiss which Miles gladly give him.

"Hello, darling," Miles says, pushing Jay's hair out of his face. "You sure you don't want to help me with tonight's class?" He teases.

"No, Owen can handle the electricity play! But Mi I have a question, why is Alex wearing a collar?" He inquired. "I mean you're not training him, are you? I thought subs had to work for their training collars." The way that Jay says it Alex knows that it's an insult.

" Alex has just begun his training, but the collar is for protection so dirty sluts like Jeff won't try coming on to my new boy." Miles joked. He gives Jay another kiss, able to tell that he's insecure. He did work very hard for his collar and wear either it or his more subtle 'day collar almost 100% of the time. Even when Owen was a full-time sub his rules about when he needed to wear his collar were nowhere close to being that strict " He only wears it here."

"Hey, Jay why don't we go find seats or something?" Jeff suggests. " You said you were going to sit with me right?"

"Yeah alright, I'm coming." Jay nodded. Now that he's proven he is the superior one when it comes to commanding Miles attention and gotten an answer that he's satisfied with he'll go quietly.

"He's being a little brat." Miles sighed rolling his eyes once Jay was gone.

"Are you going to let him get away with it?" Alexa asked.

"For now, I've got better things to do than worry about smacking him around for being a snide little cunt," Miles said. "He thinks he's playing it off so well with the fake politeness." Alex is glad that Miles doesn't fall for the sugar coating that Jay is doing. "Let's have a look at you then." He said, turning his attention to Alex.

Alex's knees begin to shake slightly as he feels Miles eyes scanning over him Examining every inch of his body. He seems pleased with Alex's appearance at the moment. He circles the smaller boy like a shark with a grin on his lips seeing that it makes Alex nervous to be surveyed in such a way. "My my don't you look lovely tonight. That skirt is a bit short, isn't it? I hope you've got something nice under it for me." Miles teases. He loops a finger through the ring on Alex's collar and gives it a firm tug. " No, this is too loose." He says, going behind the boys to unbuckle it. He tightens it another hole and then slips his fingers under it to check that it's not going to choke Alex. He's suddenly much more aware of the leather around his neck and the feeling of Mile hands running themselves over his bare arms. "Keep your chin up, remember to be aware of your posture. You want to look good for me don't you?"

"Y-yes, sir." Alex stuttered.

"That's my good boy." The praise rings in Alex's ears making him glow with pride.

"I see you've decided to go ahead and keep this one Miles? Good idea." Another voice joins in their conversation. Alex recognizes it as Josh, one of the owners of the club. "I was surprised when you told me he wasn't a sub after the film festival."

"He texted me that night that he'd like to give it a go." Miles laughs, turning to acknowledge Josh, his attention shifting away from Alex.

"So, we've converted another one then." Josh Jokes.

"You saw the film, he certainly has the tendencies for this sort of thing." Miles shrugged.

"That's not the only thing he's got going for him. If I remember right you two had some incredible chemistry. I don't think I've seen you click so well with someone, submissive or not, in quite a while." Josh points out.

"Oh really? You should have seen the model I was working with this morning. We had some great Chemistry if you know what I mean." Miles said. " I'll show you pictures later."

"I think I'll just take your word for it thanks." Josh laughed. He looked at Owen who has himself slightly huddled into the corner at the sight of Josh. "You sober boy?" There's a harsh edge to his voice that hadn't been there moments before. Owen doesn't answer, he simply looks to Miles waiting for him to speak first.

"Owen, we've been over this. You're allowed to speak to Josh or the other monitors when they ask you something." Miles tells him.

"Yes, sir, I am," Owen replied.

"Nothing in your system for at least the last twenty-four hours?" Josh asks trying to get a good look at Owen's eyes.

"Almost two days." Owen nods.

"Miles can you confirm that?" Josh asked.

"Do you think I would have brought him here if he was high? I wouldn't risk my reputations like that." Miles said.

"And you have nothing on you right now?" Josh asked Owen.

"No, sir. Of course not sir." He replied, fear evident in his voice.

"Good, then why don't you two get started with the class." Josh nodded. "I'll leave you to it!" Miles nods and looks to Alex.

"Don't you go anywhere after Owen and I are finished. I have plans for you tonight." He says winking at him before walking away with Owen by his side.

"Ooh, someone's going to get to play tonight." Alexa teased Alex as they found a mat near the front to sit on.

"I'm in trouble actually," Alex whined, finding a way to sit so that his skirt was mostly covering him while giving Miles a tiny subtle flash of his striped underwear.

"What did you do?" Alexa asked.

"Ugh, it's so embarrassing," Alex complained, hiding his face. "I had a wet dream like a fucking teenager because Miles had me edging myself last night."

"Alex, you are a teenager."Alexa giggled.

"Yeah but you know what I mean! I'm an adult!" Alex insisted. "I haven't had that happen in a while."

"So you're going to get punished for it? Oh, he must really be looking for a reason with you." Alexa laughed.

"What do you mean?" Alex asked.

 

"Means he's eager." Alexa smiled. "Sssh quiet now Alex, the class is starting."

"Hello," Miles addresses the class from the front of the room. "For those of you who don't know, I'm Miles, one of the primary educators here at Shadow Play. This is my submissive Owen, and he will be assisting me with today's topic. This class is considered to be an intermediate level electricity play class, so you all should have attended our basics of electricity class, or have you have prior experience with the subject and are simply looking for a refresher or to expand on your skills." Miles explained. Alex knows that he doesn't fit into either of those categories, but Miles had told him to show up. "Today we're going to be discussing the basics of the TENS electrical unit, as well as talk about alternate applications for the violet wand that we didn't touch on last time. If either of these topics make you uncomfortable, or you feel that this class isn't what you were looking for then we politely ask that you leave now."

"You're going to be alright with this right?" Alexa whispered to Alex who nodded his reply.

"I don't think anything can scare me after watching Miles put out a cigarette on Jay's stomach." Alex joked quietly earning him a look from Miles who obviously didn't approve of him speaking. It quickly shut him up that's for sure.

 

"Now, in our last session, we talked extensively about safety precautions when it comes to using Electricity during BDSM play. Remember that this is not something that should be attempted with partners who have pacemakers, or any sort of heart conditions. It is also not recommended for those with any sort of epileptic tendencies. Electrical implements should not be used on the face, or directly on the spine. I would also stay away from the heart as much as possible although nipples are usually fine. It is also advised that if your partner wears any body jewelry that it is removed at this time. This is especially important when using instruments like the violet wand that we will be looking at later as the electrical currents produced by the wand have been known to cause metal piercings to heat up and can potentially cause burns to your partner. Now the first thing that we're going to be looking at today is the TENS unit. TENS standing for Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation unit. They are an electrotherapy tool used commonly in the medical community for the treatment of different types of pain. So, today we're going to be exploring basic uses of the TENS unit, how to set it up and run it, basic safety precautions when using the unit and finally end with options for electrode placement and to reach different desired effects." Miles explained. " Now Owen, if you wouldn't mind getting stripping down for us and getting up on the table, please. I think it,s time for us to begin."

"Yes, sir." Owen nodded starting to pull his clothes off.

"Wow, he looks awful." Alexa pointed out. Owen was covered in bruises and what looked like needle marks. His skin looked dry, and his bones stuck out in several places. Alex wasn't paying much attention though his focus was fixed on Miles. He seemed so powerful commanding the class. There was something in the way that he spoke. So precise and intellectual. He seemed totally calm and collected in front of the group in a way that Alex knows he himself could never be. He's almost envious, but more so in Awe. He's transfixed on Miles and the tight leather pants he was wearing weren't helping any that and the constant ringing of Miles words in his mind ' I have plans for you tonight' the only reply Alexa gets is a sort of grunt in return.

Miles continues to talk, going over the electrical equipment and how it works before proceeding to show those in attendance how to zap the hell out of their play partners and loved ones. Alex wasn't paying too much mind to what was actually being said. He'd gotten much too wrapped up in his own head. At first, he was confused by the fact that Owen seemed to generally dislike the shocks and was simply tolerating the fact that Miles was sending electricity through some of the most sensitive regions of his body. Soon it quickly became apparent that this wasn't the case. As a matter of fact, Owen seemed to be just as fond of receiving the shocks as Miles was of tormenting him with them. This lead Alex to starting to fantasize about what it would actually feel like. It didn't take long for him to start imagining himself in Owen's shoes. When he's broken from his daydreams it's because Miles has switched from whatever he called that thing, Alex couldn't remember, to the wand that Miles had told him to go over and touch the other day at pleasure chest. Alex had actually been fairly alright with the short zaps he'd given himself, so when Miles asks for a volunteer to help him with the next part of the demonstration his hand shoots up so quickly that Alexa and a few others actually laugh.

"Of course you'd volunteer wouldn't you," Miles smirked. " Well, seeing as Jay won't be going anywhere near one of these anytime soon." He lights up the want causing it to start making rather loud noises. "You might as well come help me." Alex scrambles to get to his feet, fixing his skirt, and joins Miles while Owen puts his underwear back on and sits on up on the table. He looks like he's taken quite a beating, but seems happy all the same. "You want to tell the class your name?"

"Um, h-hi I'm Alex," Alex replies shyly. He had been so excited that he'd almost forgotten they were in a room full of other people who were now staring at him. Alex tried his best not to think about the small crowd. He attempted to ignore the way Alexa giggled behind her hand at his shyness, or Jay glaring daggers at him, or the fact that 'Hot Jeff' is looking at him. OH GOD WHY DID HE LOOK AT JAY AND HOT JEFF NOW HE'S SCARED.

"Looks like someone's got a little bit of stage fright," Miles said, putting a reassuring hand on Alex's shoulder. "You're fine darling. Some of you might remember Alex from our film festival a couple weeks ago. He's new to our community so I expect you all to be nice to him, and I'll try to do the same." He joked.

"Miles..."Alex whined. Maybe he doesn't want to do this. He feels very unprepared now. Miles takes a second to speak to him directly.

"There's nothing to be worried about love, but if this isn't something that you want to do then there's no reason why you have to. Are you sure that you want this? Or did your eagerness get the better of you?" He asked. The softness in his quieter tone puts Alex at ease more so than he had been moments ago.

"No, I want to do this. I'm sure that I do."Alex nodded.

"Good, then we'll proceed," Miles said grabbing the wand. "Now in our last session, we discussed the basics of the violet wand, direct contact methods, as well as a bit of the history or violet ray and neon wands in their various application. Today we're going to be discussing the indirect method of use. For this we won't be using a glass electrode," He says, tapping on the glowing tube that is attached to the base of the wand. "I shouldn't need to remind you of this, but I will regardless. These electrodes are not insertable. Though there are some made specifically for the purpose of insertion if you're not entirely sure that it is then it's best not to test the theory as this could lead to very unpleasant repercussions."

"I only did that once!" Jeff shouted out, causing those around them to laugh including Miles.

"Would you be quiet I know you're smarter than that." Miles joked removing the glass piece and replacing it with what looked like a cable. "This nifty little thing is called your contact cable and it can be used for both indirect and reverse contact methods. It's quite a common attachment so it's not something that is going to be difficult to find or be outlandishly expensive. If you own a violet wand set it's something I would highly suggest investing in as it opens up several different avenues of play." Miles explained as he connected it to the wand. "To begin use you'll need to make sure that the contact on the opposite end of the probe is making contact with your skin. I prefer to just tuck it into the waistband of my pants, finding that this is the easiest way to keep skin contact, but anything that works for you is fine as long as your maintaining constant direct skin contact throughout use." Miles slipped the metal end under the top of his pants so it was resting against the skin of his exposed hip.

"Does that mean since it's touching you that you get shocked too?" Alex asked.

"That's very observant of you Alex," Miles smiled at him. "Although the wand is on, it's not shocking me even though the current is running through my body. However, the indirect method does cause a shock to both people involved. In a moment, when I touch you, we will both be able to feel the sensation. Are you ready for that Alex?"

"Yes, sir," Alex replied. Any reason to have Miles touching him is fine in his book.

"Good, since you don't have any experience with this I'm going to start out easy. Would you hold your palm out for me please?" Alex did as he was told, biting his lip nervously as he waited for Miles to make contact with his skin. When Miles did graze his fingers across the center of his palm it created a small pleasant shock. " See, it's not terrible is it?"

"No, sir," Alex replied, most of his worries now eased by the fact that it didn't hurt him.

"With this method, the touch is what creates the contact and thus allows electricity to be transferred from once person to the other. In a sense, I have now become the electrode and my contact with Alex creates the point at which he will be shocked," Miles explained as he tapped his fingertips across Alex's bare arms causing a pleasant shiver to run up his spine from the sensation. "Also, similar to the glass electrodes the electricity will still arc through clothing." As he says it he runs a finger directly up the center of Alex's shirt causing the boy to let out a soft moan. "Oh, you like that don't you."

"Feels nice," Alex responded with a smile. Neither says anything, but both of them obviously catalog this new find in their memories for later use.

"Also, it is not only the fingers that can be used as the point of contact. As long as the probe is touching your skin then you can touch with almost any part of your body in order to shock. So if you want to manually or orally stimulate your partner that can be quite a fun effect with this tool. Even something as simple as a kiss will transfer a good amount of current." Miles explains, leaning in closer to Alex to kiss him. When their lips touch Alex has decided he is in love with this new feeling. It feels like fireworks to him causing his lips to buzz until Miles pulls away and turns off the wand momentarily to ruffle his hair without causing any shock to him. "Thank you, Alex, you've been a wonderful helper. You can return to your seat now."

For the rest of the class while Miles discusses different uses for the wand. Alex can't focus at all. All he can think about is that kiss, and how he wants more. He likes being kissed, he likes the attention, and the current flowing through Miles had made it electric in more ways than one.

Soon the class ends people start getting up from their seats to mingle. Some even head upstairs for play time. Alex sticks with Alexa downstairs while he waits for Miles although he considers going to look for him when Alexa decides she wants to spend some time with Jeff and Jay.

"Are you planning to stick around and play at all?" Jeff asked Alexa. "Arielle should be out of work fairly soon and is meeting me here. I remember you two having a lot of fun last time we all played together." Arielle... she was the coat check girl from the last time that Alex had been to Shadow Play right? Or was he talking about another girl? Was she one of Jeff's submissives? Miles had said that he currently had a boy and a girl.

"Not tonight, actually I'm about to head out. Besides, if I'm going to play with anyone else while she's out of town then I'd have to talk to Eva about it first." Alexa responded.

"Oh, you two are leaving so soon? What a shame." Jeff said. " I was hoping to get to know this one a little better." He said smiling at Alex. "That was very brave of you to go up there with no experience earlier. Most post new submissives wouldn't be so daring, even some of the more experienced crowd aren't comfortable with Electro play."

"Thank you," Alex muttered quietly. "And I'm not leaving just yet. Miles told me to wait for him." He avoids making eye contact with Jay as he says it. "I-I think I'm in trouble actually. I broke a rule this morning."

"Miles doesn't like rule breakers you're probably in for it tonight," Jay smirked. Alex whined, he doesn't like the sound of that. Jay is hoping that Alex will get his first taste of punishment and it will run him off.

"Would you stop trying to psyche him out, Jay? Just stop. Miles is fed up with your behavior and honestly so am I." Alexa rolled her eyes. " Alex is a sweetheart and he's not trying to steal your Dom away. He's not Eugene and he's not you either, so just stop."

"I thought you were supposed to be on my side," Jay replied.

"I don't see any sides here. I just see you being mean to an eighteen-year-old boy because you're not getting the attention that you want. Grow up." Alexa said.

"Aaaw, is my little Jay jealous?" Jeff asked, grabbing Jay by the hip and pulling him closer kissing his neck. Alex is very confused by the behavior he's seen from Jeff and Jay together. Is it because they were both Miles' submissives? Did Miles allow this? He must allow it if they were being so openly affectionate. Alex would have though Jeff was joking if Jay didn't seem to actually be enjoying the touches. This seemed far too normal for them. "Ask Mi if you can come play with me until Arielle gets here. He won't mind. Seems like he has other plans for the evening anyway."

"Maybe I will," Jay smirked, this might be the most at ease Alex has seen Jay be around him.

"Maybe you will what?" Miles asked finally appearing in the group with Owen close behind.

"Ask you if I can go play with Jeff for a while," Jay said, turning to Miles.

"Are you sure you want to play with that thing, you don't know where it's been." Miles joked.

"I am perfectly clean thank you, Kane," Jeff said, elbowing Miles.

"You going to take good care of my boy tonight? I expect you to give him a good work out if you're going to ask for my permission to play." Miles said.

"Do we have your permission then?" Jay asked.

"Yes, you do, but I expect you to text me and let me know when you're home and what you two have done together," Miles told Jay. "Jeff I don't want you breaking skin on him."

"That's fine, I think I can manage that," Jeff said.

"Alright then, you two have fun," Miles said kissing Jay quickly, too quickly for Jay's liking it seemed. "Alex, Owen, let's get going."

"Ok," Owen muttered with a yawn. Why was Owen coming with them? Alex thought that he would be the only one going with Miles tonight. Miles wasn't going to make him play with Owen, was he? No, he wouldn't do that. Not so early on. Besides Owen looked exhausted. He'd started looking a bit drowsy about halfway through the class. Perhaps that was why Miles had asked for a volunteer, to give him a momentary break? Alex wasn't sure, and he wasn't going to question it either so he simply followed along.

" Don't worry, I won't interfere with whatever Miles has planned for you tonight," Owen says as they get into a cab together. It's as if he can see the worry written all over Alex's face. "I'm just crashing in the guest room because I've got nowhere to stay tonight."

"Not feeling well are you?" Miles asks, running a hand through Owen's hair. Owen is leaned against the window on the opposite side from Alex with Miles in the middle. He doesn't reply but does lean into the touch. "No, you're not or you wouldn't be so affectionate."

"It's the withdrawal, I need to sleep." Owen sighs. When his behavior is more docile, the way it is now, Alex can see why Miles is reluctant to give up on Owen the way everyone else in their circle has. It's hard for Alex to believe that this is the same man that he's heard stories about. Stories of drugs, violence, and selling his body for money. This was the same person that caused Alex to remove glass shards from Miles' back. Right now he seemed so calm.

" I know you do. We'll be home in a minute." Miles assured him, kissing Owen's forehead.

It doesn't take long for the cab to pull up in front of Miles' building. Immediately on entering the flat Owen heads or a door across from the kitchen towards the front of the apartment opening it to reveal a stairway. "I'll leave you two to it then. I'm going to go lay down." He yawns again.

"Goodnight love," Miles calls after him as Owen clicks the door closed. "Don't worry. He won't be able to hear anything that you and I are doing up here. The guest room is actually on the third floor. Really it's in the back of the studio, but can only be accessed through that stairway so technically it's still a part of my flat." Miles explains. Knowing that actually made Alex feel slightly better, it's not like Owen would be right next to them or anything. "Besides, he's still crashing from his last binge so he'll be out soon."

"You're very kind to still take care of him," Alex says smiling at Miles, He wasn't the soulless demon that some might lead you to believe he is. Miles thinks for a moment before he replies.

"It's cause I've been close enough to being like him to empathize. I just want him to find his way back to what he once was," he shrugged. Alex has seen and heard occasional whispers of a darker side of Miles, but he's not here to pry into his private life so he decides that it's best not to ask what he was implying with that comment.

"Soooo, what do you have planned for tonight?" Alex asked Miles, shifting his weight back and forth from foot to foot while he waited with his hands behind his back for further instructions.

"Come sit on the couch, we'll talk a bit about what I'd like to do with you tonight," Miles said walking over to the couch. Alex did the same, sitting with his knees closed and his feet tucked under him as he looked in Miles direction waiting for him to speak. Miles takes his time removing his shoes and unbuttoning the top few buttons of his shirt to make himself more comfortable He draws out each motion intentionally to build anticipation in Alex. "Are you nervous?" Miles asked him.

"Should I be?"

"Probably, but you tend to surprise me with your bravery," Miles admitted.

"I am nervous," Alex admitted, fidgeting with the hem of his borrowed skirt. "But, also excited."

"Good. Even though you're aware that you're in trouble if there wasn't part of you that was looking forward to this then I would say maybe this isn't for you." Miles said.

"I think it's the fact that I'm not sure what to expect that I'm anxious about." Alex sighed, trying his best to relax.

"Don't you worry your head about that darling, that's what we're going to talk about now," Miles said, leaning over to pull Alex closer against his side. "I need you to relax, alright love? Now, I'm going to tell you what I have in mind and you tell me if you're up for it or if any of the things that I've suggested make you uncomfortable Understood?"

"Yes, sir," Alex nodded in reply, already eased by the feeling of Miles' arm around him.

"Good. That being said, I've already made you aware that I'm not going to be taking it easy on you. You were aware of this when you chose to accept your collar. There are several things I'd like to introduce you today. First of all, you know you're to be punished tonight. As we negotiated in your rules your punishments as of now consist of spanking." Miles informs him. He's been looking forward to this all day, he's been waiting for a reason to slap Alex's bum red and raw since his first saw him without his clothes on.

"I figured." Alex nodded, in truth, he's just as eager about it as Miles is.

"Since it's the first time I'll just be using my hand, there's no need for whips or any other implements. However that doesn't mean it won't hurt, it absolutely will." Miles told him. "This isn't a game, and I find it disrespectful when you break my rules, but I'll let you make it up to me. I think I've been far to giving with you thus far and it's about time you learn how to please me. Either with your mouth or hands, I haven't decided just yet, but probably a combination of the two." Alex smirked he's been hoping he'll actually get a hand on Miles this time around since he hasn't so far. He's been practicing his oral skills on just about anything that he thought would help. This had led to an awkward situation involving Alex standing in the light of an open refrigerator with a cucumber jammed down his throat when Alexa had come home one evening.

"I would also like to introduce you to arm restraints in the form of leather cuffs, and possibly the blindfold. Depending on if you're getting overwhelmed or not I may leave the blindfold out and we could try it another day. At the end, if you've done well then I'll let you pick out one of my toys to finish you off with. Does that all sound good?" Miles asked. Alex blinked, it sounded like a lot and he was more than ready for it!

"Yes, sir," He nodded rather enthusiastically.

"Good boy," Miles said reaching over to peck Alex on the lips. He reached for his hand taking it in his own. " Now, come along. There's a couple little procedure things that we need to discuss before we get started." Alex followed along after Miles through the flat to what Alex thought must be his bedroom however when he opened the door Alex realized it was certainly not a bedroom. It was a room filled with several pieces of equipment similar to things that he could remember seeing upstairs at Shadow Play. Several of the contraptions Alex couldn't fathom the use of. He was also morbidly curious about the cage that took up the far corner. "Welcome to my playroom."

"Playroom? How very Christian Grey of you." Alex giggled. Miles twitched.

"No, we don't mention that filth in this house. We believe in proper BDSM procedure here. You stay away from that toxic slop, you'll learn from me, not from that awful excuse for a novel." Miles snapped.

"Yes, sir. Sorry, sir, " Alex said looking down at his feet.

"Now Alex, this is something that I expect you to remember. From now on when you are invited over here to play, when we come into this room to begin a session you will kneel on the floor next to the door while I prepare things for our session and wait until I give you further instructions. Something I will ask that you strip down prior to going to your waiting spot, sometimes I will prefer to undress you myself." Miles said.

"What would you like me to do today sir?" Alex asked, kneeling down on the ground.

"Very good, you're catching on already. Today I would prefer just your top off. I'm rather fond of the skirt at the moment, but you don't need to kneel just yet love. Come over here, please. I want to let you pick out the toy you'd like to try late. I don't want to have to stop when we come to that point in our scene." Miles said.

"Ok!" Alex said, getting back to his feet and pulling his shirt over his head as he walked over to where Miles was standing. In front of him was a bookshelf full of different toys. Alex looked over his options, some of them he wasn't even sure what they did. He eventually picks up a rather large realistic looking dildo that looked to be close to Miles size with a suction cup at the end. "This, I want this one." He said.

"Alex that's the same as the one that you tried to pick out at Pleasure Chest that I said would be too much for you." Miles sighed.

"But... I'm curious about what it's going to feel like." Alex said picking up the toy, it's odd to him how much it feels like real skin in his hand.

"Oh are you?" Miles asked.

 

"I-I'm not ready to have sex. Mentally, emotionally... I'm just not there yet. I'm not even sure that I want you to be my first," Alex admitted, biting his lip. "But I'm curious about what it would feel like."

"It's perfectly alright to be curious," Miles tell him. "If you're sure, then you can try it, but I'm also going to grab the smaller version too. In case this is too big for you."

"Ok, I can live with that." Alex nodded.

"Good, now back to your spot then with you," Miles told him. "You remember your safe word right?"

"Yes, sir," Alex said as he walked back over to the door and knelt down on the cold hard floor, thankfully his socks were providing a bit of padding for him which made it slightly more comfortable. "Green for good, Yellow for slow down or clarification, and Red to stop everything."

"Very good. Then we'll go ahead and start. Quiet now, I'll let you know when I'm ready for you." Miles said. He started to rummage through several drawers, picking things out and putting them back. Really he didn't need much. Just a blindfold and a pair of cuffs that would fit Alex's small wrists. He's just wasting time to make Alex wait. He takes the blindfold he's chosen and as well as the cuffs and walks over to the couch, putting them on the table to it's left. He then unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way, removing it and giving Alex a view of his incredible back muscles. "Alright, Alexander come over here." He instructs him.

Alex gets to his feet without saying a word walking over to Miles and standing in front of him. "How would you like me, sir?" He asks. Miles sits down on the couch.

"Feet as close to on the floor as you can manage them, bum over my knee, face down on the couch," Miles said. Alex gets into his position as best as he can taking his time, remembering what Miles had told him about not needing to rush his movements. He looks better when he's not so clumsy. "You're such a little tease, Alex," Miles tells him, running his hands over Alex's bum, flipping up the back of his skirt. "Wearing this short little skirt, flashing me your cute little panties all evening." It's then that the first slap comes down on his backside causing Alex to yelp. "Oh don't tell me that hurt, we're just getting started."

"N-no, sir, " Alex said. In all honesty, it had just taken him by surprise.

"Good, I expect you to be capable of handling much more." Judging by all of the scars all over Alex's body Miles would assume that he has a fairly high pain tolerance. If he'd asked Alex about it then this theory would have been confirmed. If there is one thing he's learned to handle it's pain. That's part of his motivation for wanting to try this. He's so used to others inflicting pain on him without his consent. The idea that he could be in control of the pain, that it could be mixed with pleasure was a foreign idea to him. The best part was with one simple word he could make it all go away if he chose and having that control, being able to set the limits for once. That was enticing beyond anything that he'd ever known. He's stripped from his thoughts by a harder slap coming down on his bum, followed immediately by two more each one harder than the last had been. The last one caused Alex to whine a bit.

"You doing alright?" Miles asked, moving his hand to Alex's skirt to pull it back down.

"Yes, sir," Alex confirmed, feeling the skirt slip down his thighs and hit the floor.

"Good boy," Miles said, running his hand down Alex's spine before giving him another set of four quick swats over his underwear. " I rather like these on you." he told Alex. "I'm very fond of stripes. It will benefit you to remember this preference." He adds another smack to drive the point home. By now Alex's eyes have begun to water and his hands are both balled into fists. "But I think that it's time for them to come off. Let's see that cute little bum of yours." Miles slides Alex's underwear down to just above his knees letting them stay there rather than removing them all the way.

When Miles' hand comes down the first time on Alex's bare skin the sting is intensified by the skin on skin contact. Alex whimpers again, screwing his eyes shut. Despite the pain, he can feel himself already starting to harden where his cock was pressed against Miles leather-clad thigh.

"Fuck," Alex muttered.

"What was that Alex?" Another slap.

"N-nothing," Alex replied.

"Nothing what?" Another slap followed immediately by a second, third, and forth on alternating cheeks.

"Nothing, sir," Alex whined.

"Better," Miles said, "You will remember to address me properly, or you'll only elongate your punishment." There's a slight growl to his voice that Alex finds incredibly arousing. "Already starting to get nice and red." He comments, rubbing his hand over Alex's warm cheeks causing Alex to let out a little cry. "Does that sting?" Miles asked as his palm cracked down again on the inflamed sink.

"Yes, sir," Alex manages to get the word out as Miles begins another assault on the sensitive skin of his backside. It only takes a few more before the burning starts to give way to pleasure. Although it still hurts Alex can't help but moan and that's what Miles has been looking for, the line where he crosses from pain to pleasure.

After a while Miles touches become gentle again. "Alright, sit up," He tells him.

"Am... Am I done, sir?" Alex asks. He's shaking as he sits up on the couch and he notices a spot where precum has been pooling on Miles plants.

"Yes, you've taken your punishment very well Alex," Miles told him, wiping away the tears that had caused Alex's eyeliner to run down his cheeks. "I'm quite happy with how well you've for your first time. You've made me very proud." Miles said, grabbing the ring on Alex's collar and pulling him in for a kiss.

"Thank you, sir." He says when the short-lived kiss is broken.

"Do you know what good boys get when they make me proud Alex?" Miles asked.

"What do they get, sir," Alex asked.

"They get the privilege to suck their masters cock. Would you like that? Yeah, you would, wouldn't you?" Miles asks.

"Yes, sir," Alex would in fact very much like that.

"Then get on your knees for me boy, right there on the ground," Miles said, pushing Alex down between his legs and leaning back on the couch to get comfortable while the boy serviced him. Alex was now eye level with Miles bulge. Part of him was proud that he was the one that had been able to get Miles so hard. He of all people was attractive enough to turn someone like Miles Kane on! Although he should have known this when Miles needed to touch himself after he'd filmed him, it still shocks Alex that anyone finds him attractive.

Alex slides his hands over the smooth leather a few times. It must be real, and probably expensive seeing as it's incredibly soft. He then pops the button through the hole and slides the zipper down, looking up at Miles as he does. Once the zipper is down he notices that Miles isn't wearing anything else underneath... of course not, in pants that tight there was no room for extra material. Alex suddenly finds himself wondering how that must feels, to be walking around all evening with the tight material rubbing so teasingly across his length. Even when he's flaccid it must still feel incredibly good.

"Fuck..." Alex Mutters as he pulls Miles erection out, freeing it from its tight entrapments. He always forgets how big Miles is.

"I don't believe I told you to speak, I told you to sucks." Miles scolds. Right, it was time to put all of that practice to good use.

 

Alex likes to be good at things. He'd prefer to be the best if he can, or at least he wants people to think that he is. Miles is no exception if anything he wants twice as badly to impress Miles. Unfortunately, this leads him to be a little overzealous in his approach. He tries to take far to much to Miles into his mouth at once, causing him to gag and choke when the tip of Miles cock lodges itself in the back of his throat. He pulls back quickly coughing a bit causing Miles to frown, but not for the reason Alex would assume as he'd seen the expression. Miles is plenty aware that Alex lacks experience. That's why he's there to give him guidance.

"Easy Alex, don't hurt yourself," Miles tells him, pushing the boy's hair out of his face. "Slow down, take your time. I'm sure you'll do fine." Alex looks up to meet Miles' eyes. He wants to tell Miles that he can do it, but it's not enough to tell. He wants to show him that he's capable of the things that he's sure that the other boys are. Granted, porn and household phallic objects are probably not the best aids to learning, but he sure as hell wasn't going to ask Nick if he could practice on him again, especially now that Nick has a boyfriend.

This time he decides maybe trying to deep throat isn't the best idea so instead, he wraps his hand around Miles shaft, starting to rub the skin. It feels much thicker and full in his hand than his own ever did. He opens his mouth, sticking his tongue out and stilling his hand movements to give Miles a good lick from base to tip. "Much better," Miles comments as Alex repeats the motion before settling himself lower to suck at the base, while his hand wrapped around Miles cock higher up. Miles moaned as Alex ran his thumb over his slit. "See, you don't need to choke yourself for it to feel good." He assures him.

Alex takes the words to heart, continuing his motions. With every moan he's gaining more confidence, but he does have to work much harder than he did with Nick. Nick being a virgin as well the name of the game was 'don't make him finish too fast' with Miles Alex doubted that would be a problem. He kept licking and sucking different places along Miles shaft without taking Miles fully into his mouth. He used his hands to rub over whatever part of his dick wasn't currently being paid attention to until Miles decided to up the stakes a bit. "Alright Alex, hands behind your back " Miles said, reaching to grab the leather cuffs off of the end table.

"Yes, sir," Alex said, pulling his mouth and hands away while he put his wrists together behind himself.

"Stand up for me. Turn around," Miles instructed him. It would be easier to get the cuffs on that way rather than having Alex stay on the floor. Alex got to his feet doing as he was instructed and waiting while he felt the leather cuffs slip around his wrists. Alex was surprised at how soft they were, much like his collar. They seemed a bit larger than he had been expecting. If he was in a situation where he was being restrained against his will and needed to escape he could probably pull out of them with enough effort. Miles seemed to take noticed of this. " I might have to get you a smaller pair of your own." He says as he puts the clasp into the last hole. "If you're good I'll let you pick out the set yourself. Perhaps something to match with your collar." Miles said. He could envision Alex in a pair of nice red cuffs, it would be quite a nice sight.

"I'd like that sir," Alex said, letting Miles clasp the other cuff and attach the chain that linked the two of them together.

"Well, you'll have to earn it," Miles said. "Show me that you deserve to be rewarded." He added, putting a hand on the top of Alex's head and pressing him down, watching as Alex slowly sunk back down to his knees and turned around to face him once more. For some reason, this feels like more of a challenge to him without the use of his hands. He finally wrapped his lips around Miles cock, taking the head into the mouth and starting to bob his head up and down.

Alex soon realizes that this is more tiresome than he would have thought. When he had been practicing he would only do so for short intervals and then pull himself away so he could breathe. As he's quickly realizing being with another living breathing person there are much higher expectations he can't be so leisurely about it. Alexa had told him that the key was to breathe through your nose which was easier said then done but without his hands to continue his motions he didn't want to stop for fear of disappointing Miles and therefore disappointing himself as well. Miles, of course, took notice of this as Alex's face start to turn red. "Alex you can breathe, I'm not going anywhere you know." He laughed, grabbing the boys hair and giving it a very gentle tug to make him aware he could stop for a moment to catch his breath. "Don't want you to pass out. You're of no use to me like that, and it's not good for your healthy."

"I'm sorry, I'm just-"

"Inexperience. I know, but you're doing a wonderful job. You have a very pretty mouth." Miles smirked, patting Alex's head as the boy looked up at him with a big smile. "You can stop being so nervous. You'll get better with time and lots and lots of practice which I'm sure I can help you with."

"Yes please!" Alex said. He's actually enjoying this. There's something inside him that gets a certain sort of joy out of giving others what they want. Maybe it has to do with the praise that he receives for doing a satisfactory job.

"Your eagerness is so refreshing it's a nice change of pace," Miles tells him. Alex may not have a clue, but he's willing to give it his all unlike his other little brats he calls subs. It's not to say that Jay and Owen don't still do an excellent job, or that Miles doesn't love the sessions he still has on occasion with Jeff, but they all know their skills and are confident in them to the point where they sometimes feel they don't have to try as hard. Jeff especially now that he has his own submissives can be rather lazy when they're together. Alex, on the other hand, seems to be more willing to press his own physical limitations in order to please him and that's thrilling to see. With more time and work, Miles can already tell he'll be able to groom him into an excellent sub for either himself or his next dominant.

His next dominant...

That was a thought that Miles considers as Alex finally starts again licking his shaft, letting it slip across his saliva slicked lips and chin without his hands to keep control before taking him back into his mouth. It's silly to think about now, after all, they've only just begun his training! However, Miles knows Alex isn't someone he'll be able to hold on to forever. There are many things that he has to offer Alex, but there is one thing he can't and that's the one thing that Alex wants the most. It's silly to think that Alex will stick around once he starts to become the man that Miles can see the potential for him to be. There will be other Doms that would attempt to court him and he would allow it for Alex's sake. To keep him from someone who would be a better fit would be cruel and selfish. He has to keep the younger boy's best interest in mind, but that didn't mean he would let any fuckboy who thought he was a Dom approach what was currently his property. That said it wasn't hard to think of quite a few Doms that would be a wonderful match for Alex once he'd honed his skills a bit. Among those names, Jeff and Josh came to mind. Josh seemed fond of Alex, and he and Brody had been wanting a sweet little house boy of their own. Even Miles old mentor from when he was younger would make an excellent choice were he not back home in England.

He's shaken from his thought as Alex makes another attempt to take his cock deep into his throat, this time with much more success as he's relaxed his throat muscles now. He does gag, causing saliva to drip from the corners of his mouth, but whoever said that more spit was a bad thing! Miles hadn't been expecting it and bucks his hips forward a bit unintentionally with a low moan. "Oh fuck Alex, that's good. Very good." He tells him causing Alex to smirk with his lips still tight around him and attempt the same motion again. Miles is surprised that it has him already on the edge as Alex pulls his head back some, running his tongue across his slit as he continues to bob his head. "That's good, just like that." Miles moans as he cum's down Alex's throat. Alex hums happily at the taste. Sure it's not exactly candy, it's really not the most pleasant thing he's ever tasted, but it is a sign that he's done his job well and he treats it as an honor which Miles appreciates.

"Was that ok, sir?" Alex asks as he finally pulls away looking up at Miles.

"More than ok, it was very good for your first try," Miles tells him, caressing the side of Alex's face. "You've made me very happy."

"Does that mean that I get my rewards, sir?" Alex asked, biting his lip and hoping that he's earned it.

"I think you certainly have." Miles smirks as he gets up and slips his leather back up around his hips without fastening them. "Stand up, turn around." Alex scrambles up, slipping a bit as he gets to his feet, his legs had fallen asleep a bit while he'd been on his now sore knees. He would have to remember to try wearing thicker socks next time as they were the only thing that remained on him, probably since Miles seemed to enjoy them so much.

Miles took a moment to look Alex over before taking off his cuffs and tossing them aside. They landed with a thump and a jingle on the couch, Alex's eyes following the whole time. "Are you going to use the blindfold on me, sir?" Alex asked.

" I think I may save that for the next lesson," Miles tells him. Alex is looking a bit tired from what he can tell. All of the new feelings and experiences were taking their toll on the boy and this last bit Miles knew would be rather taxing on him. For the average sub this would be a very light day, but for an eighteen-year-old boy who's experiences were limited to a couple sloppy blowjobs with his friend it was a great deal to ask of him.

"I can handle it!" Alex whined.

"I'll be the judge of that Alexander." Miles snapped. "And don't you dare start whining unless you want to lose your reward. I won't tolerate it, understood?"

"Y-yes, sir," Alex said as a shiver ran up his spine. Whenever Miles used that more stern tone with him he couldn't help the way it made him twitch with excitement. He absolutely loved it already!

"Come over here, bend over the arm of the couch." Miles commanded, keeping the same tone "Face down, get your ass up nice and high for me." Alex tried his best to keep his hips high, presenting himself for Miles. Miles grabs the bottle of lube off the table and coats his fingers. "Have you been using your plug as you were instructed to?"

 

"Of course," Alex replied. "Sir," He adds quickly.

"Good, we'll have the cute little hole of yours good and trained in no time." Miles smirked, giving Alex's bright red backside a quick slap causing him to let out a little cry, muttering an 'ow' under his breath. He's obviously sore, Miles will take care of that when they're finished of course. " I'm going to start with the smaller one." He tells Alex as he starts to slip a finger into him with much less resistance than there had been the last time.

"But I-"

"You don't been to push yourself like that Alex, not tonight. I'm tempted to say you've already had enough but this is your treat that you chose." Miles tells him as he starts to work a second finger in. He can see that the boy is starting to tire.

"Then can I have the bigger one next time please sir?" Alex asked finally giving in.

"Yes, you may," Miles nodded, kissing Alex's back as he pushed a second finger into him causing the boy to gasp and clench his fists into the couch cushions. He'd have gone ahead and let him try if it wasn't for the fact that Alex's knees were already shaking. No matter how tough that he thought he was Miles knew that Alex would soon feel the effects one the adrenaline wore off.

Alex whimpered as Miles started to thrust and curl his long fingers inside him. There's part of Alex that is tempted to ask if he can just be fingered, but he does want to try the new toy. Maybe another time. Today is a day for new experiences, each one he has enjoyed. He's quite sure that he'll enjoy this one just as much as he heard the lube cap snap open again as Miles coats the new toy in it. "Are you ready Alex?" Miles asked, rubbing his hands over the sore inflamed skin of his behind. The excess lube on his fingertips leaves cool patches on the skin making Alex hum with delight.

"Yes, sir," Alex says with as much confidence as he can muster. With that Miles starts to press the head of the dildo into him. It's not to much different size wise then the vibrator that he has at home, but it feels entirely different. Rather than the smooth vibrator that curved up at the end the dildo in Miles' hand felt much like Alex thought a read penis might feel like inside him. The shape was close to real. He could even feel the little ridges of the fake veins on its surface and the way the 'skin' moved as Miles continued to press the toy into him.

"This is supposed to be pretty close to real. I'm fairly fond of them. Hopefully, it will be able to satisfy some of your curiosity." Miles tells him with a smirk on his lip. He's only just gotten passed the tip and already Alex is letting out small moans as he presses his face into the couch cushions.

" I like it," Alex muttered. It's certainly better than either his vibrator or the plug he has. "I should have gotten one of these instead." He admits.

"Oh, don't say that darling. I know you like your vibrator. Besides," Miles pushes it the rest of the way in all the way down to the base. "They don't make these in purple." He joked. Alex laughed although his eyes are shut tightly. " You doing alright?" He runs a hand down Alex's spine to his shoulder, giving is a quick squeeze. Alex's hand immediately darts to Miles and he squeezes back.

"Can I have a second please sir?"Alex asked, trying to get used to the full sensation he's not sure he's ready for Miles to start moving the toy inside of him just yet.

"Of course you can just relax," Miles said, rubbing his hand across Alex's shoulder and neck once the boy had left go of it. It takes a minute before Miles starts to see the tension leaving Alex, but he's not going to start again until Alex communicates to him that he's ready. Someday they will get to a point where body language will be enough of an indication, but they're not there yet.

"Alright, I'm good," Alex said after a while.

"Manners Alex. If you're ready to resume you need to ask me politely for what you want," Miles tells him.

"Can I please have some more, sir?" Alex asked.

"Much better." Miles praises as he grabs the base of the toy and starts to pump it in and out of Alex. He starts off slowly watching the boy's reactions. As he thrusts harder and faster Alex's Moans became louder and louder till he was crying and squirming on the couch in pleasure. To Miles, their sensitivity of was the most fun of a brand new submissive. He'd had one other he'd gotten fresh and young and.... no. No, now was not an acceptable time to be thinking about that. He wouldn't allow himself to, he needed to focus on Alex. Alex was the one in front of him. Alex was the one he was enjoying the high pitched squeals of. Alex was the one who's was pressing back harder and harder against his hand.

"I'm close, sir," He whimpered. " C-can I please cum. Please, oh please!" He begged in the sweetest desperation.

"Yes, you may," Miles told him. No sooner had the words come out of his mouth then Alex gave one last shout and came on the arm of the couch. Miles pulled the dildo out, watching as the now oversensitive boy started to come down from his high. He turned to put he toy down but luckily didn't go far because Alex began to fall backward as his knees gave out from under him. Miles grabbed him quickly before he could collapse onto the floor. "Easy Aly, I've got you."

Alex is glad to feel a pair of strong hands on him, holding him up. He doesn't know why he was falling but it took him a moment to realize that he was. If not or Miles then he's sure that he would have crashed to the floor. "Thanks." He muttered getting back to his feet. "Just got lightheaded there for a second I guess."

Miles guides Alex over to the couch. He sits down, pulling the smaller boy into his lap, holding him tight. Alex immediately nuzzled his face into Miles' chest, curling into the arms that feel so secure around him. Miles strokes his hair, waiting for Alex to calm down a bit before he speaks. "C'mon lets go and get you cleaned up." He suggests. Alex nods, he had just started to close his eyes, but shook off the sleepiness and got up. He's really hoping that Miles won't make him go home tonight. He would fall asleep in the cab for sure if he did. Miles luckily doesn't plan on letting Alex go anywhere.

He takes the boy's hand, helping him up, and guiding him back through the living room and into the bathroom. "Want a shower or just-"

"Shower please," Alex says before Miles can suggest the alternative. "I feel sticky and sweaty and I'm fairly sure that there is spit dried to my chest." He sighs while Miles turns on the shower getting it warmed up for him.

"Will you be alright alone for a second if I got to check on Owen real quick? I just want to make sure he's alright." Miles asked as he unfastens Alex's collar for him. Although he's reluctant to leave Alex alone he just wants to pop downstairs and make sure that Owen is, in fact, still there.

"Yeah, I'm a big boy I think I can handle showering alone." Alex joked as he pulls off his socks

"It will just take a second, and I'll grab you something to put on when you get out," Miles says leaving Alex alone to wash up.

It doesn't take Miles long to go make sure that Owen is as expected in a deep sleep in the guest room. It looks like he hadn't even managed to get his shoes off before he collapsed. Miles pulls them off for him, taking the blanket from the end of the bed and covering him with it. He then flipped up the light and went back upstairs. He went into his room and pulled out a shirt for Alex and a pair of underwear that Miles isn't even sure will fit, but they're too small for him so it's worth a shot. He abandons his leather pants in favor of pair sweatpants before heading back to the bathroom.

"Your shampoo smells really good," Alex says as he hears the door open.

"Thanks." Miles laughed. "You doing alright in there?"

"Mhm, how's Owen?" Alex asked with a yawn.

"Didn't even manage to take off his shoes before he fell asleep. He's exhausted. I understand it though. Until he sobered up to do the class he was up for several days. His body is sleep deprived." Miles said.

"Now that he's sober do you think that he'll stay that way?" Alex asked as he turned off the water.

"No, he never does. I'll probably have him stay with me for a couple days though. See if I can at least get him feeling a little better." Miles sighed, he's seen Owen go back and forth so many time he doubts it will ever be permanent.

"That's a bit sad. He seemed so nice earlier. It was so different from how he acted the other day." Alex commented, grabbing the towel Miles had left for him. He wraps it around himself, Miles eyes never leaving him as he does. "Ooh, soft." He smiles nuzzling his face into the material. Miles smirks and walks over to Alex, rubbing him down with the towel making Alex laugh and press himself closer to Miles. He likes the feeling of Miles hand on him. He adores this time after their scenes end when Miles takes care of him in such a sweet way.

"Here, put this on," Miles said, handing Alex the shirt once he's dried off. Alex gladly slips it on. It's soft and a bit big on him, as he buttons a couple of the bottom buttons he can't help but smile catching sight of how he looks in the mirror. He thinks he looks rather cute. He's about to reach for the briefs that Miles brought him but Miles grabs his hand. " Not just yet love." He reaches to grab a bottle of healing lotion off the sink and then takes Alex's hand leading him into the bedroom.

The first thing Alex takes notice of is, of course, the bed. It sits under three enormous paneled windows. Before he's even reached it he notices how soft it looks. The sheets are a deep burgundy red covered up by what is possibly the fluffiest looking leopard print blanket that Alex has ever laid eyes on. He walks over to the bed and falls into it, letting the softness engulf him and right off tries to wrap himself in as much of the blanket as possible. " I want a blanket like this." he groans happily. Miles laughs.

"Well you can get under it in a minute, let me see your bum first Alex." He says.

"Ok," Alex says unwrapping himself a bit to lay atop the soft surface. "I'm warning you now though, I will not be held accountable for my actions if I'm a blanket hog tonight."

"I assure you it's plenty big enough you don't have to worry about that," Miles said, putting some of the lotion in his hand and applying it to the red skin of Alex's bum. "So, what did you like best about tonight?" he asked.

"Um, I don't know that there was really a specific part of it that I liked most. I mean, getting off was great. That's always great! I think it was just the challenge of the whole thing that I like. It was new. I felt like you were really giving me a chance to prove myself and that was something I really enjoyed." Alex said after a moment of thinking about it.

"Was there anything that you weren't as fond of?" Miles asked.

"No, I enjoyed all of it really. Even being punished wasn't so bad!" Alex admitted. To be honest he'd enjoyed being spanked.

"You have a very good attitude I really appreciated your willingness and enthusiasm," Miles said, clicking the lotion cap closed and putting it on the nightstand. Alex rolled over to look up at him, it's that same genuine smile he'd first caught sight of at the High Line.

"I just wanted to make you proud of me." He admitted

"Well, then you succeeded. I'm very proud of you." Miles can't help but smile back. He finds himself doing that a lot more often with Alex around.

Alex slides his way up the bed to rest on one of the pillows, it's obvious that he's very tired after all the excitement. "You want these?" Miles asks, holding out the underwear to Alex. Alex takes them from Miles' hand, pretending to think about it for a moment.

"Mmm... No!" He says, tossing them back at Miles, giggling to himself as they hit him in the face.

"Why you little-" an evil smirk crosses Miles face as he crawls over top of the smaller boy and digs his fingers into his sides.

"No, NO! MILES, STOP! STOPPPPP!"Alex squeals unable to stop himself from laughing and thrashing under Miles' fingers. The assault is short lived however as Miles hands still and his lips find Alex's in a passionate kiss. Alex's back arcs up off the bed as he tries to press himself against Miles but instead the older man lays next to him, pulling Alex against his side to keep kissing him.

Within minutes they're both half-hard pressed against each other when Miles phone buzzes on the nightstand. Alex whines in protest as Miles pulls away to check the message. "Who's it from?" Alex asked.

 

"Jay, he's just telling me he's done with Jeff and he's staying over at his flat tonight. Says they left together because Arielle never showed at Shadow Play." Miles shrugs." My guess is she was coming and Jeff told her not to in favor of playing with Jay. He's got a bit of a thing for him actually. He'd probably like to have him full-time were I not ' in the way'" Miles laughs. "They've been playing together for years though. Back when Jeff was mine full-time they were play partners quite often, it's changed slightly since Jeff has taken on a Dom roll now, but I'm not bothered by it."

"So wait... so Jeff likes Jay, but Jay is in love with you..." Alex is trying to get this all straight cause it confuses him.

"Essentially." Miles shrugs. " I would gladly give up Jay to Jeff if that's what they wanted. Jay would be better off really, but that wouldn't make him happy. He would rather be in my care and he chooses to stay. It's a bit sad really. He's got someone right in front of him that's enamored with him, but still, he chooses unrequited love. I'll never understand it" He sighs as he puts his phone down and turns off the light. Alex rolls closer to him, pulling the blanket over himself and wrapping himself tightly around Miles.

"But they say that we're powerless to control who we love... I wouldn't know I've never fallen for anyone. Not yet at least." Alex sighs, shoving his face into the crook of Miles' neck.

"Well, aren't you a clingy little thing. Like a little spider monkey." Miles laughs running his hands through Alex's hair.

" 'M sleepy Miles." Alex yawns.

"Then go to sleep little monkey," Miles said, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy keeping him cradled in his arms remembering what he'd said the last time about liking to be held. If there's one thing Miles is striving for after an intense session it's to make Alex feel safe.

Alex mutters something unintelligible that could have been a good night. Miles isn't sure and he's not about to ask, figuring he's already asleep.

Miles realizes as he nods off that he actually feels a little less lonely than he has in a while with Alex next to him. It comes as a bit of a shock, but he'll figure out the implications of it in the morning.


	7. Disco 2000

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So I know that I've been saying that this was going to go up for forever. I'm sorry about the delay. I've got some things going on with my family that has me rather busy and running back and forth across the state for long periods of time. even when I could find free time I've been too stressed out to get much done. 
> 
> SO it's extra long to make up for it. 
> 
> Also, I'm going to start putting more of My Milex works on AO3. I'll probably start with the one-shots and shorter bits and do Aviation last because it's an absolute beast off a fic and will take a lot of time.

The scent of cigarette smoke filled the air rousing Alex from his sleep. As he resists opening his eyes for a few more seconds he notices that he's colder without Miles' body heat next to him. He whined pulling the plush blanket closer around himself, rolling over on his stomach to entrap it around his entire body. He finally cracks his left eye open, Miles coming into focus not far from him. Alex had known he must be close by from the scent of the smoke. Miles sat on the edge of the bed with a lit cigarette in one hand and his head resting in the palm of the other. "Morning Miles," Alex mutters with a sleepy yawn, causing the other man to shift his attention towards him.

"Good morning sleepy head. Did you sleep well?" Miles asked, leaning over momentarily to ruffle Alex's already messy bed head.

"Mhm, your bed is so comfortable." Alex yawned again, stretching out from underneath the blanket.

"What can I say, I like nice things." Miles shrugged, turning his back to Alex once more as his mind fell back to whatever he'd been pondering previously. Alex decided that anything disturbing Miles mind is not ok with him! He wants Miles attention on him! So, he wiggled his way out from the grips of his plush leopard print cocoon and crawled on his knees over to Miles. He threw his arms around Miles' shoulders and wrapped his legs around his torso clinging to his back in a way that screamed 'I will have your attention'. Miles didn't seem to mind at all, in fact, the feeling of the smaller boy's warm breath on the back of his neck was rather soothing. "Look like the spider monkey strikes again." He joked halfheartedly.

"You looked upset. Is something wrong?" Alex asked. Miles thinks to keep to himself what's bothering him but decided that there is really not point in keeping things from Alex now that he's becoming a part of his life on a regular basis. Telling him that he doesn't get to ask about his personal life is a moot point now, especially as Alex is now acquainted with those closest to him as well including his other subs. He seemed to have wormed his way into the older man's life in a way that most of Miles submissive in the past other then only a select few had. He already, even in such a short space of time, found himself putting Alex into the same category that he would Jay or Owen who he'd known for many years.

"Owen is gone. I went to check on him when I woke up this morning and he'd already left. I was hoping that he'd stick around for a little while this time. He might come back tonight. He occasionally does when he doesn't have a place to stay, but I doubt it." Miles said, exhaling the another drag from his cigarette.

"Where do you think he's gone?" Alex asked.

"To get high obviously, which is why I doubt he'll return. He'd rather sleep in a gutter somewhere then feel like he's disappointing me. He's well aware just how much I want him to get sober." Miles sighed.

"But you're his Dom, right? Can't you just tell him he has to stay and make him get sober?" Alex asked.

"There are limitations to what I can do Alex. I can't simply force sobriety on him. He has to be willing to try for himself. Short of locking him in that room from the outside there's no way I would be able to keep him here. Even then, if he was desperate enough he would find a way to get out." Miles himself knows that feeling of desperation to some extent. Never to the level in which Owen did though. There had been one occasion when they had tried to keep Owen quarantined in Matt's basement during his withdrawal. With no way out he'd resorted to breaking a mirror in order to use the jagged edges to harm himself. When they'd opened the door in order to help him he's managed to get past Miles and Matt, escaping the house. They didn't see him for almost a month after that and when he did finally return he was worse for the wear.

"I'm sorry. I've never been around anyone like him before, so it's hard for me to understand." Alex admitted.

 

"I hope that it's something that you never come to understand Alex," Miles sighed. "It's hard to watch someone you care for destroy themselves like that. Nothing scares me more than when I can't get in contact with him. I'll call hospitals in the area, or sometimes the jails trying to find him. Usually, it's because he's let his phone die or he's left it somewhere when he's high, but there have been a couple of occasions where he was hospitalized... I'd go and get him, then he would just disappear all over again it's a never ending cycle of destruction." Miles admits as he tastes the first hit of his cigarette filter. He reaches over to stub out the ember in a small glass ashtray that sits on the bedside table. "I'm hoping one of these days I don't wake up to find his name in the obituaries. You have no idea what it's like just waiting for someone to die."

"Actually... I do, well sort of at least." Alex said, his hold on Miles tightening slightly.

"Yeah? Who?" Miles asked. He figures if he's being open with Alex then maybe Alex will be willing to do the same with him. That's a shocking idea for him, does he want to hear more about Alex? Is he truly intrigued by the idea of getting to know him?

"Yeah, me," Alex said, trying to laugh it off nervously.

"What do you mean?" Miles asked, turning his torso causing Alex to dislodge from his back and fall onto the bed snuggling back into the blanket.

"I um..." Alex sighed realizing that maybe he had said too much. He's reluctant to share anything about his life prior to coming to New York with anyone. On a couple of occasions, Alexa had attempted to get him to talk which he'd been resistant to. One evening when she'd tried to push him with leading questions he had stormed off to his room, slamming the door and locking himself in. With Miles, it felt a little different. Part of him felt as though he had to tell Miles, and there was another part of him that wanted to.

"You don't have to explain if you don't-"

"I do... But you have to promise me that you won't-" Alex huffed, looking for the right words. "I'm not looking for sympathy or anything." He finishes as he undoes the first couple buttons of Miles shirt that he has on. He pulls the fabric to the side revealing his shoulders as it slips down. "These four right here." He says, pointing to the small red lines. " They're not all that old actually. I guess that they're from about a year and a half ago..." He starts to explain leaning back on the bed. Miles lies down on his side next to him, looking over at Alex.

"What are they from?" Miles asked, trailing the lightest of touches over the scarred skin causing Alex to flinch reflexively.

"You know how I told you that the boys on my football team used to bully me?" Alex asked.

"I remember you saying something like that, yes," Miles replied.

"One day I was walking home after practice. Usually Nick and I walked home together, but I knew that practice was going to run long because we had an important game coming up. So I told him to go ahead without me. The quickest way to get to his house was through this little patch of woods that was behind the school, so I'd gone that way rather than walking out along the road. It was nothing new, I did it all the time. I never really thought twice about it. That day was different though. Two of the boys from my team cornered me in the woods and... Well, I'm not exactly the biggest guy so I couldn't really fight back. One of the guys, Tommy, he had a knife on him. It wasn't anything big just a pocket knife really. As soon as I saw it rather than running I just froze and so he stabbed me with it. Got lucky I guess, the stupid fuck couldn't remember what side of the body the heart is on." Alex fakes a laugh as if he genuinely found that fact amusing. "When they saw the blood they ran off, I don't think their idea initially was ever to stab me but in the moment things got out of hand."

"Doesn't matter what the intention was. He still stabbed you. Did you have him arrested?" Miles asked.

"No, no one would believe me. Of course Mr. and Mrs. O'Malley did, but they were the only ones! Not even my coaches believed me. We were teammates! Why would they want to hurt me, and it didn't help any that I had just been taking off starting line-up and guess who had replaced me?" Alex shrugged.

"But you obviously had injuries from it!" Miles insisted.

"They thought I'd just been attacked by some bum or something then took it as an opportunity to frame Tommy for it. I didn't really care though. Even if I had been able to prove it no one would really have cared anyways. I was just the little fag boy to them so what happened to me wasn't even worth it to them to look into. I knew that was how things would go so when they left me there I just.... didn't get up. I was probably being over dramatic because the wounds weren't actually that deep, but there was a lot of blood and I thought that I was going to die. So I just waited there and accepted it. Then it started to get dark and I figured I wasn't dead yet so I got up and walked the rest of the way home." Alex said, shrugging it off once again as thought it was no big deal.

"That's sad Alex, that's really sad." Mile sighed, still tracing small circles around the old wounds.

"Strangely... it really wasn't. When I thought I was going to die out there, really truly thought I was going to die, I came to a strange sort of peace about it. After that nothing really hurt me anymore." Alex admitted.

"You're stronger than you let on Alex," Miles told him.

"Thanks, I still don't feel like it sometimes," Alex admitted, looking up at Miles who had rolled over and was now hovering over him. "The thing about trying to be strong is that it wears you out. I just don't have the energy for it most of the time." Miles doesn't reply he instead leans in and kisses Alex. Never one to turn down any affection that he could get Alex kissed back.

Miles is a bit in shock after hearing Alex's story. He didn't realize just how much the younger boy had been thought. Somehow his craving for attention started to make sense. He just wanted someone to be kind to him. He pulled Alex closer to his side, rumpling up his shirt as he did. He ran his hands over the boy's soft skin as he pulled his lips away. "I'm proud of you Al." He muttered. Alex's face lit up as he soaked in what Miles said to him. It's all he ever really wanted to hear. Sure, Miles had told him that after their lesson the night before but right now in this context it carried a different weight to it.

"You mean it? It sort of felt good to actually tell someone... I'm not going to tell you any more sad stories." Alex said trying to laugh it off.

"No, it's inspiring in a way. I know you said that you had it rough and... how do I say this without sounding insensitive." Miles sighed. "I was very fortunate, I had a good life. My mum was very supportive, I lived in a bigger city so the ideals were more progressive, I was out by the time I was fifteen and that was just fine no one ever bothered me about it. I never had to feel fear really. Maybe there was a little bit of anxiety when I first came out, but that was it and that was just being worried what my friends would think and things of that nature. I always knew there were those before us or in places all over the world that didn't have the sort of freedom that I did. I've read books and educated myself on the issues that the gay community faces. Hell, I could probably give historical tours of the village at this point, but everything that I know pales in comparison to what you have lived." Miles tried to explain. "Especially at your age. I've met a few of the old guard in the village but they lived in a whole other time. There's a few I'd like to introduce you to at some point."

"I'd really like that and I might have to take you up on that tour sometime," Alex said smiling at Miles while the older man grazed the tips of his fingers along his cheek and jawline. He closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying the gentle touch. There was a moment of thick and undeniable tension between the two of them. Alex's chest felt heavy under the weight of it until Miles spoke.

"How about breakfast?" He asked, getting up from the bed and stretching his back. He reached down and picked up his cigarettes, lighting another from the pack. "Why don't you call that friend of yours Nick? You usually see him on Thursdays, don't you? Tell him to meet us at the Washington Square Diner in twenty minutes." He added as he paced the room looking for something decent to wear and something for Alex.

"Oh... Ok." Alex said. Somehow he'd been hoping that Miles would want to spend a little bit longer with just him although, he was excited for Nick to finally meet Miles so he grabbed his phone to send a text. It's then that he notices he already had two messages from Nick.

"What are you up to this morning?" and "Want to finally check out some of Central Park?"

"Stayed the night at Miles' last night. Want to come meet us for breakfast?" His thumb hovers over the send button for a moment. He considers not sending it. He could just tell Miles that Nick had something else going on that morning and had declined the offer, but that would be dishonest of him and he doesn't want to lie to Miles. When he does send it he receives a reply almost immediately.

"YES! Where at?"

"That little Diner over on seventh behind the park," Alex replied.

"Here," Miles said causing Alex to look up from his phone. He had a pair of jeans and a belt in his hand. "figured that you wouldn't want to wear that skirt this morning. It's a bit risque for breakfast." Miles joked.

"Maybe I like risque," Alex smirked, taking the jeans anyways because he doesn't actually want to wear the skirt.

"Then go ahead and wear it if you like, but if you do I won't be held accountable or my actions." Miles winked.

Alex struggles half the walk to the diner trying to keep his pants up. Normally Alex would be inclined to complain about it, but he thinks that he looks much too cute in Miles' clothes to bother. That was something he'd always fantasized about, thinking about how cute he'd look in his boyfriend's clothes that were are least a size too big to fit his thin frame. Sure, Miles wasn't really his boyfriend but he was close enough really. Whatever Miles was to him he liked it that was for sure. He liked the way Miles was holding the hand that he wasn't constantly using to pull up the sagging pants and he liked the way that his collar felt around his neck. "Here, put it on." Miles had said as they were leaving. "Don't want you losing it on your way home." He'd added winking at Alex and helping him tighten it around his neck.

When they arrived Nick was already there waiting for them. "Took you long enough, I thought you might stand me up, Turner!" He joked when Alex got closer, letting go of Miles' hand to hug Nick.

"Hey! We had to walk further than you did and we'd just gotten out of bed!" Alex insisted as they walked inside.

It comes as no surprise to that Nick is a bit starstruck by Miles. After all, he had known who he was well before Alex had met him. What does shock him is Alex's behavior with Miles around. He seemed much like a giddy child constantly giggling and leaning his head against Miles' shoulder when Miles whispered something unknown in his ear causing the boys face to redden slightly "Breakfast is on me boys, get whatever you like." Miles said.

"Mmm, I can't make up my mind. Would you pick for me?" Alex asked, nuzzling Miles' shoulder again. Miles smirked, enjoying the fact that Alex is giving him control outside of their scenes.

"You were good last night. Good boys can have pancakes as a reward." Miles said, kissing Alex's cheek and making him giggle behind his hand. Nick just blinked at them both. What on earth has happened to his best friend the bashful blushing boy seemed totally foreign to him. One thing was obvious though, Alex is absolutely smitten with Miles. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out.

"So Nick, Alex says you're going to NYU. What's your major?" Miles asked.

"Um, F-fine art." Nick stuttered when Miles finally turned his attention to him. He wasn't the type to be nervous. He was much more confident in social situations than Alex who was now playing with Miles' hand, drawing lines back and forth across his outstretched palm.

"Oh, that's interesting. I've got a good friend of mine who is a professor over there. She used to teach Art History, but I'm not sure if she still does or not. It's been a while since we've spoken." Miles said. "What's your discipline?"

"Photography actually." Nick blushed he couldn't believe that he was actually admitting to MILES KANE that he to was a photographer or at least a wannabe one anyways.

"Alex, why didn't you tell me your best friend was a photographer. You know Nick you really should come by the studio some time I could show you a thing or two if you like." Miles offered.

"Didn't cross my mind, you usually have me busy with other things." Alex shrugged, watching suspiciously as Miles slid his hand down off to the table and, running it over the bunched up denim of his too large jeans.

"I would really love to come by sometime if it wouldn't be to much trouble. I'm sure that you're busy, I wouldn't want to get in the way." Nick said. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity, he would be crazy to pass it up. "I really love your work by way. I'm sure that Alex has mentioned-"

"He's a total fanboy Miles! When I met you he insisted that I had to go to that first photo shoot and then report back everything about you." Alex rolled his eyes, sending a smirk in Nick's direction to let him know that yes he is, in fact, trying to embarrass him.

 

"Shut up Al it wasn't like that!" Nick insisted.

"Yes it was, he stalks all your social media accounts. He told me so. He says that it's for my protection, but really it's just because he's in love with your work." Alex laughed.

"For your protection?" Miles asked raising an eyebrow at Alex as his hand slipped up a bit higher on his thigh. Miles had mentioned to him as they were getting ready that this was one of his favorite games to play with his submissives. He liked to see how quiet they could be while being teased in public. Alex, of course, had been more than agreeable to the idea hence why he was playing up his affectionate nature a bit more than was necessary. It would mean they could sit closer to Miles and would give him a chance to hide his face against the other man if it started to get to be too much for him. "Nick, do you think I would hurt this little angel?" Miles joked.

"You really think I'm an angel?" Alex asked, grabbing Miles hand and moving it to the crotch of his jeans with a devilish smile. He wants more attention, but of course, Miles can't let him think that he's making the rules.

"Don't let it go to your head little monkey." Miles laughed, pulling his hand away entirely. Alex will only get as much as Miles is willing to give him. Nick has absolutely no idea what to make of all this.

"I didn't really think you would hurt him, but he's... well-"

"You know full well I can take care of myself, Nick." Alex sighed.

 

While they waited for their food Miles actually put in some effort to get to know Nick. Little did Nick know it was partially to keep him talking and keep Alex quiet and partially to genuinely make Alex happy. Besides, he had heard good things about this Nick kid from Alexa. Meanwhile, his hand had slowly made its way under the waist of Alex's jeans and into his underwear. As Nick talked animatedly about a set of conceptual shots that he was working on Alex had bitten a hole throw his bottom lip causing small droplets of blood to form on his lip. Keeping his mouth shut was becoming harder and harder. Miles had very talented fingers which were currently wrapped around his cock, and being inexperienced wasn't doing him any favors at a time like this. Still, he was determined not to give away the secret. He knew if he did Miles would stop and he would loose out the game. The thought of loosing brought a question to his mind. What would winning mean? Would Miles actually get him off right there without anyone knowing? With NICK sitting right across from him? Does he still need to ask I he can come even though he's not allowed to make a sound? Would he get in trouble without him asking?

"I would really love to see your portfolio sometime," Miles said as their waitress brought them their food. As soon as the food hit the table Miles pulled his hands away from Alex to focus on his food. Alex wanted to whine about it but instead leaned closer to Miles in order to whisper to him.

"You're cruel, that's not fair!" He groused.

"You don't decide what's fair, I make the rules," Miles whispered back. "Eat your pancakes before they get cold, and I expect you to finish them."

"Nick, he's trying to make me fat." Alex rolled his eyes.

"Good, you could stand to gain some weight back. Mum will be happy about that. She used to joke about trying to tube feed him after-" Nick cut himself off thinking better of what he was about to say Alex shot Miles a look before smiling at Nick.

"It's ok, he knows." He said, taking a bite of his pancakes and causing syrup to drip down his chin.

"Well, you can tell your mum he's in good hands." Miles assure Nick. He reached over to wipe the dribble of syrup off of Alex's chin. He had intended to simply wipe it away, but Alex had other plans. He dodged forward to catch Miles' thumb between his lips licking the syrup away and raking his teeth gently along the pad of his finger. Even Miles was a bit taken aback by the boy's bold action.

"Alex, ew! Stop some of us are trying to eat here you pervert." Nick rolled his eyes.

"He said I've got to eat all of it! I can't be wasteful. That would be rude." Alex justified wiggling his eyebrow at Nick. "You never want to spill a drop, Nick."

"... I don't want to hear that from you. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT FROM YOU." Nick said, putting his hands over his ears, but not before stuffing another strip of bacon into his mouth. At that moment Miles' phone began to ring. He looked down at the caller ID from under the table and sighed.

"Boys, this is work. I've got to take this quickly." Miles said, getting up from the table and answering his phone as he walked towards to door of the diner. Once he was out of sight Alex heaved a contented sigh.

 

"Nick, he makes me so happy." He admitted.

"I can tell... Al, didn't Alexa warn you about getting too attached to Miles? Are you sure that that's a road you want to go down?" Nick asked.

"... I can see why Jay is so in love with him." Alex mentioned. He sighed trying to compose the words he was looking to say. "We had this weird moment this morning where you could just FEEL that there was something there. I'm not delusional, I don't think he's going to somehow fall for me. I like having his attention though."

"You're awfully affectionate with him. I've never seen you like this before." Nick said. It isn't necessarily a bad change but it is one none the less and Nick has never seen something so drastic in such a short time in all of their years together. "Are you falling for him?"

"I might be a little," Alex admitted, thinking about telling that the reason he was being so loving with Miles this morning is that he was groping him under the table, but decided against it because Nick probably wouldn't want to know that. "Mostly... I just like that he's so kind to me." He shrugged looking out the window. He had expected to see Miles talking on the phone, but instead, he saw him standing near the small corner park directly next to the diner. Next to him was Jamie of all people. Miles had sighed, covering his face with his hand before dropping it to his side in exasperation.

"Alex... Alex! Are you listening to me?" Nick asked, pulling Alex's attention back to his best friend across from him.

"Huh? Sorry, what did you say?" Alex asked. Nick knew that Alex had been staring at Miles, but didn't know who the other man that he was with was. It wasn't someone that he'd run across while lurking Miles social media.

"I was trying to tell you... Well..." Nick was bright red looking down at his hands. " I um, I had sex with Andy." He admitted hiding his face.

"What! When? What was it like?" Alex asked, trying to keep his voice low as not to embarrass Nick

"We were fooling around the other night in his door room. His roommate was going to be out for the night with his girlfriend who lives in Brooklyn so we had it to ourselves and well-"

"Did you bring it up first or did he?" Alex asked.

"I did, but only because I could tell that we were on the same page. We both wanted to wait until we were sure and-"

"So does that mean that you're falling for him?" Alex glanced away again to see Miles still talking to Jamie. Should he tell Alexa that he saw them together? He'd jumped to conclusions more than once when it came to what Miles had been doing. Maybe he should ask him when they were alone again. There could be a perfectly logical explanation for him needing to meet up with Jamie. Even if he did have an excuse, Alexa had warned him not to believe all of the things that Miles said to him.

"I think so. I really think this could be the start of something lasting." Nick tried to shrug it off but his smile told Alex all he needs to know. He looked back up as he heard the door open behind them and saw Miles come back in.

"I'm sorry I've got to cut this short boys," Miles said, walking back over to the table. He pulled his wallet out of his pocket and left a couple of bills to cover breakfast. "But work is calling. Alex, make sure you finish those pancakes, I'll see you at the club tomorrow alright?"

"Yes, sir," Alex nodded, sitting up and little straighter and leaning towards Miles. As if knowing what he wanted Miles leaned in to kiss him on the lips this time. He let it linger or a bit, letting Alex enjoy the feeling.

"Be good, I'll be busy most of the day but text me if you need me," Miles said, kissing the top of his head for good measure before turning to leave the diner.

"I can see why you like him," Nick said once Miles was gone. "Have you had sex with him yet or-"

"No," Alex said stuffing another bite of pancake into his mouth. "That's why I was asking you what it's like. By the way, I do expect ALL of the details. Miles and I do other things though. Last night he spanked me, let me blow him, then pounded my ass with a dildo." He said bluntly.

"I love how you can say that with a straight face like there's nothing weird about it." Nick rolled his eyes.

"Because it's not weird. I like it, it's fun. Letting him be in control takes so much stress off of me. Even this morning, I didn't even have to pick my own breakfast and I'm more than happy with his choice." Alex shrugged.

"How is it that I'm the one who's actually had sex and yet I still feel like you're more experienced than with me." Nick sighed.

"It's just because Miles is more experienced than Andy. It makes sense that I would be doing different things with him then the two of you are doing right now." Alex said.

" I see he's got you wearing that collar today." Nick pointed out. "Did he make you wear it or-"

"No, he did put it on me this morning, but that was only so I wouldn't forget to take it home with me. I only have to wear it to Shadow Play. He said it's to keep me protected from other Doms. I would like it if he told me to wear it more often though. I like the way it makes me feel. I like the feeling of actually belonging to someone." Alex admitted. "... I want to belong to him."

"Alright, Daniel. That will be all for today. You've done a wonderful job." Miles said at the end of their photo shoot. He handed the boy an envelope with his payment into it. "I'll be needing you to come by again on Tuesday. I have a designer who will be sending over a few more garments that I think would work well for you." He added, guiding the boy towards the elevator door.

"Did you really just send him home... Without doing anything to him?" Matt asked. He sat at Miles' desk with his sneakers up on the top of it.

"Feet down Matthew." He said.

"Have you been body snatched?" Matt asked as he got to his feet while Miles packed up his cameras.

 

"Is it so weird that I didn't feel like having sex with him?" Miles asked.

"Yes, it's entirely weird!" Matt insisted.

"I have plans for later." Miles shrugged as he rearranged his lenses on the shelf that resided on the far wall. "C'mon let's head upstairs. I could use a beer."

"You've read my mind, Kane," Matt said as the two men entered the elevator and made their way up to the fourth floor. "You seem like you've been a little off today. What's up Mi?"

"Nothing," Miles said walking into the kitchen to get them beers. "Just a bit stressed this afternoon. Owen stayed over here last night and when I got up he was gone. I went and talked to Jamie this morning but he hasn't seen him today. I'm going to go to Hunt's Point later to see if he's up around there somewhere."

"Is that what you had in mind when you said that you had plans tonight?" Matt asked.

" No, Jay is coming over. I haven't been giving him the attention that he deserves. He's been acting out ever since I started training Alex and that's so unlike him. I'm starting to think that it's partially my fault. I've given him a reason to feel insecure. He's not been kind to Alex, but at the same time I don't think punishing him for it is the answer." Miles sighed, that's another part of what is bothering him. He hasn't been able to figure out how to deal with Jay.

"He's been very upset by it actually. I saw him the other night." Matt admitted. He still wasn't sure how he felt about this new Alex boy. He didn't dislike him, but he also had only met him very briefly, so it was hard to say that if he liked him as much as Miles and Alexa seemed to.

"He stayed the night with Jeff last night. That should have loosened him up some. Then he'll be with me tonight. I'm hoping that he and I can talk and work though some of what's bothering him. He needs my full attention. No distractions tonight." Miles said. "If he's calmed down then we won't have any problems at the club tomorrow since I promised Alex that he could come."

"Oh, right. I put him on the list with you." Matt said.

"Thanks, Matt. I just want to make sure that he and Jay don't end up fighting at one of your parties." Miles sighed.

"Is that really the only reason? You better tell me at least part of this is because you feel SOMETHING for Jay and you want him to be happy." Matt said crossing his arms. "Or are you really just worried about keeping this new boy safe from him?"

"I do care about Jay you know that," Miles said glaring at Matt for insinuating otherwise.

"You know it kills Jeff to see the way that you treat him." Matt pointed out. "He's trying to be happy with Arielle and George, but you know who it is he really wants."

"Jeff can have him," Miles said as he flicked his lighter and held it to the end of his overpriced organic cigarette.

"Yeah maybe if you didn't have Jay under some voodoo curse that keeps him trapped in a loveless relationship." Matt retorted.

" You say it like I've actually done something to make him feel that way. I've told him a million times! If he wants to go he can go! My feelings aren't going to change and he knew that to begin with. I know you all want me to, but I can't just force myself to fall in love with Jay! If it was going to happen then it would have happened already. We've known each other for all these years and I'm still waiting for the day that he see's he'd be better off with Jeff but I can't make him fall for Jeff anymore then he can make me fall for him." Miles insisted. They have gone round and round with this same conversation many times always coming to the same conclusion that they were at an impasse.

"This is why I'm glad I like women mate. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay, there's just too much drama with our particular group," Matt shrugged. "Does Jay know that Jeff is actually in love with him?"

"No, I don't think Jeff has ever told him outright. I sure as hell hadn't and I don't think that Alexa has either." Miles sighed.

"Maybe you should mention it to him... If he knew, then it might change things." Matt suggested.

"If Jeff hasn't said anything, then it's not my business to do if for him," Miles stated, taking another long draw of his cigarette.

"You say that but really I think you're not telling him because you're afraid that he's actually going to leave and then you'll be alone again." Matt pointed out. Miles looked down at his feet.

"Is it selfish of me?" Miles asked.

"Incredibly, but I can't say I wouldn't do the same in your position." Matt acknowledged with a sympathetic look. He knows deep down Miles is still hurting. He needed someone like Jay around. Someone who understood him. "You do love him deep down. You know that right?"

" 's not the same though Matt. It will never be the same. I'm never going to feel that again because there is no one out there like Eugene." Miles admitted.

"Wake up Miles, he's not coming back and you have to move on eventually and stop using Jay as a crutch. For fuck sake think about someone else for once. As his Dom, it's your job to put Jay's needs before your own and all you're doing right now is keeping him stuck under your thumb while you dangle your shiny new plaything in his face. It's Cruel! What do you even know about this kid anyways? He's eighteen Miles! EIGHTEEN. You're going to be thirty soon, you need to realize that a man like you doesn't belong with a boy like that. You-"

"Enough! Give him once change. Give him one shot tomorrow to see the things in him that I do. You know nothing about him that isn't second hand. You didn't even come to the film festival. You know nothing about Alex." Miles ranted.

"I intend to give him a chance don't worry but you know my friendship with Jay will always come first. I thought maybe you would feel the same way." Matt shrugged. "I'm going to go. You work this out with him tonight Kane."

"Yeah, I'm trying to why do you think he's coming over." Miles sighed. He feels even worse now than he did this morning.

Miles wanted to talk to Jay about what was bothering him. He really did! But, when Jay had shown up he was already more than ready to go and Miles just couldn't find it in his heart to say no to him. He hadn't seen Jay that eager to please in a long time, but not long into their scene something shifted.

"On the floor. All the way down. You're going to lick that boot until the leather shines." Miles growled, bringing the riding crop in his hand down on Jay hard enough to make a whooshing noise at is cut through the air.

"Yes, Master," Jay said, laying on the floor under Miles' feet. As he brings his eyes level down to the tip of Miles' black leather boots he notices something under the couch that he then reaches for. "Have Alexa and Eva been using your play room again?"

"I didn't tell you to speak I told you to get to work on my boots," Miles snapped reaching for the skirt. "Alex must have left it last night." He added, tossing it to the side. Jay had all but forgotten seeing Alex the night before in that same skirt and a collar. He forgot the mention of him leaving with Miles. He'd had such a good time with Jeff that all animosity he was holding had been wiped away but now those feelings were returning stronger than ever. He sat up glaring at Miles.

"You know, you could have been kind enough to at least get rid of the evidence," Jay growled.

"I didn't see it under the couch, and did I say you could-"

"Fuck off Miles. I'm calling it, Yellow, we're taking a break." Jay huffed sitting on the couch next to Miles.

"... I wanted to talk to you about it when you first got here but-"

"If you really wanted to then you would have. That's bullshit and you know it." Jay ranted.

"Having other subs around has never been a problem till now. You don't get jealous of anyone else I'm having sex with. What is is about him that you dislike so much?" Miles asked.

"I've been waiting since we met to have you as my Dom. I knew you were someone that could really give me what I wanted. Jeff and Owen were my friends they weren't a threat. We all had fun together. Even Eugene was fun and since he left everyone else that has come and gone has been short term. Then he comes along and suddenly everything is different. You cut me out of the film without even mentioning it to me. You told me I was going to be your star! I don't care about the recognition I just wanted you to see me that way even for a second. I thought you'd be proud of me for it but instead, I got discarded just like those other little sluts that you're always fucking around with. You were too busy showing off this kid that you hardly knew to even pay attention to me! Same thing last night, like I didn't even exist Miles! This is the first time you and I have spent any time together in almost three weeks because since he showed up everything has been Alex this and Alex that. He doesn't deserve all that attention. I do! I've earned it, but he's just getting it handed to him because he's a cute little twink. Guess what Miles the sparkle is probably going to wear off after you fuck him." Jay yelled.

"Is that what this is about Jay? The film?" Miles asked.

"A little bit," Jay admitted. "It can't be a coincidence that things have changed since you met Alex. I just wanted to be the one you were proud to show off to everyone for once but it seems like no matter what I do nothing is ever good enough for you Mi." he hung his head looking down at his feet. "You make me feel like I could be just anyone, as far as you're concerned there is nothing special about me what so ever."

"Jay that's not true at all." Miles sighed. "I am proud of you. I always am! And you will never be just another boy. You're one of my best friends and-"

"I don't want to be your best friend Miles!" Jay said starting to tear up. This isn't the first time, it won't be the last. He's let Miles hurt him over and over again since Eugene left. "I need more. Just tell me why I'm not good enough. Why? What do I have to do? I'll do it!" He begged. "Just stop ignoring me for that boy." Miles sighed pulling Jay into his arms and luckily the taller man allowed it, sobbing into Miles' shoulder.

 

"Sssh calm down Jay. Please don't cry. You're my star no matter what. I thought you would know that by now. I-I do love you, but it's just not the same darling. It could be, but I'm still healing. I need more time." Miles tried to reason.

"There's only so long I can wait Mi," Jay said. They both know it's not true. He would wait forever if Miles asked him too and Miles is all too aware of that fact which doesn't bode well for Jay.

"Give me a little longer?" Miles said kissing Jay again. "C'mon, you and I are done for the night lets go bed."

"Well.... I mean I did only call yellow." Jay pointed out, rubbing his eyes. "Can we keep going? Please?" He's feeling a bit better after that assurance from Miles.

"Alright, whatever you want ." Miles smiled at Jay. He'd been hoping that he would say that.

"So, What do you think?" Alex asked, walking into Alexa's room in his raver outfit which consisted off metallic purple hot shorts that left very little to the imagination and a simple black crop top which exposed his stomach. With it, he wore his usual sneakers without any knee socks this time thinking that it looked sexier with his bare legs on display. Besides, he would want to dance and Alexa had warned him about just how hot the club could become!

"You look adorable. Do you think you'll be alright in those shorts dancing with Miles all night? They look like underwear... are you wearing underwear with them?" Alexa asked.

"No, where the hell would they go? Why do you think that I should?" Alex blinked at her wondering what he should do. He's never worn something quite so bold out in public before, but he figured that if a girl could wear them to the same venue then he could as well.

"No, I would go without," Alexa confirmed. " Your outfit is missing something though." She said, looking Alex over before deciding. "First of all, you need a one of these." She said, grabbing a candy necklace that was still in its wrapper and handing it to Alex.

 

"Is this actual candy?" He inquired.

"Of course it is! What else would it be?" Alexa asked.

"I don't know, it could just look like candy." Alex shrugged, putting it over his head.

"There's still something missing. I think I know exactly what it this outfit needs." She walked into her closet returning a minute later with a headband with a pair of LED cat ears which glowed purple. "This will go perfectly." She said putting them on Alex's hair and fluffing his curls up around it so only the ears peaked through.

"It's so pretty!"Alex exclaimed, admiring the new edition in the mirror, noting the way that the purple reflects off the silver eye shadow he's wearing. He's now thoroughly excited for a night of partying.

That excitement wears off when they reach the club and realizes that he is completely and totally out of his element. The music was loud, the pulsing of the bass matching up with the heartbeat making his chest flutter uncomfortably. He reached for Alexa's hand, not wanting to get separated from her in the crowded entryway. Luckily for him, Alexa seemed to know where she was going. "We're in VIP upstairs." She told him seeing the confused look on Alex's face. Oh, right, they were going to be with Matt who was the one throwing the rave in the first place.

Alex was following Alexa up a flight of stairs when he feels a strong hand behind him grip his hip. He turns around to see Miles standing behind him in a pair of sparkling gold leather pants. His hair which had been longer just the day before had now been shaved down close to his head. His chest was bare other than a pair of black suspenders and the darkest eyeliner Alex has ever seen. "H-h-" Alex is trying to say hello but it comes out at 'Holy hell.' instead .

"Wow Mi, when you said you were cutting it I didn't think you meant that you were going to shave yourself," Alexa said, rubbing a hand over Miles' scalp. "I think it looks nice. Don't you agree, Alex?" Alex nodded hastily bobbing his head up and down.

"Don't look so dumbstruck darling." Miles laughed putting his hand on Alex's lower back and encouraging him to keep walking. Upstairs in the balcony was the VIP section it overlooked the dance floor below. The tables were filled with top shelf liquor in colorful bottles Alex wasn't sure what was in the blue one, but he wanted to try it.

"S-sorry, you just look-"

"Miles! The fuck have you done to your head!" A voice shouted from across the room. It was Jeff who unlike everyone else was dressed much the same as he had been at Shadow Play a few days before although this time it was with the addition of Adam Ant style war paint on his face. "You almost look like a real man now rather than some pretty boy."

"And you look like you're dressed for some underground hipster show in Williamsburg rather than a rave!" Miles pointed out.

"Raves aren't punk." Jeff shrugged. "But they do come with a nice view." He added looking Alex over.

"Keep your hands to yourself. That's my date you're trying to eye-fuck." Miles said giving Jeff's shoulder a playful shove.

"Fine, then I'll just go look for Jay." Jeff shrugged.

"You lovers aren't coming out to play tonight?" Miles asked.

" Don't call them that. They're my subs and no George is in trouble and Arielle is at work. I'm a single man tonight."

 

"You slut." Miles rolled his eyes playfully as Jeff passed them to go and look for Jay downstairs. "Did you see how he was looking at you?" Miles whispered against Alex's ear as he threw an arm around him. "You look so sexy, I'll be fighting off the dogs tonight." Alex just blushed and let Miles push him towards the table that everyone was sitting around. Alex vaguely recognizes a few of the people from Shadow Play but he hasn't met most of them. He does notice the girl from Pleasure Chest. What was her name again? He couldn't remember.

Miles took his usual seat between Matt and Alexa, pulling Alex into his lap. "Helders, you remember Alex right?"

"I certainly remember hearing an awful lot about him," Matt said turning to Miles. He had to admit that Alex was cute. He seemed a bit feminine in a way that even he found attractive. There was something that works about Alex in Miles lap with his arms wrapped around him. "Say Hello Aly," Miles whispered to Alex, brushing his hair away from his neck.

"H-hello," Alex said nervously.

"Don't be fooled he's not actually that shy," Alexa told Matt. "I think someone needs a drink" she added handing Alex some sort of unknown drink. Alex is about to ask what it is before Miles takes it out of his hand.

"Nope, no alcohol for you tonight. I'm disappointed in you Alexa, you know that he's not Twenty-one." Miles said smirking at Alex who has a devastated look on his face. How is he supposed to make it through a social event without something to loosen him up. The night he'd met Miles he had been quite intoxicated and still felt awkward. This time he had Miles at least. Miles would protect him, so he would be just fine. Subconsciously his fingers went to his throat where his collar had been just the day before. He'd warn it the rest of the day, not taking it off until he showered before bed. He liked the way it felt. The weight and slight constriction grounded him, it made him feel like he belonged somewhere.

"Miles... please?" Alex complained in his ear. He shook a bit to emphasize just how nervous he was feeling. "I don't like this."

"There's no reason to be anxious Alex. You've got me here, do you think I'm going to let anything happen to you? Alexa is here too if I'm not around and I had a Talk with Jay last night. He's going to be nicer, or he knows that he'll be in trouble." Miles informed him.

"Why would you do that. He already hates me!" Alex complained.

"Stop your whining love the sooner that the two of you can be friends the better. Jay is a good man and one of my closest friends. I can't stand to see how unhappy you being around makes him or how afraid he makes you." Miles sighed.

"You." Matt butted in, able to hear what Miles thought was a quiet conversation.

 

"Sorry?"

"You, you're the one that makes him unhappy. Not Alex." Matt said.

"Thank you Matt, but we already had that conversation yesterday. Now could we please not talk about this in front of Alex?" Miles asked.

"I told you I'm still taking Jay's side with this one." Matt shrugged.

"I-I think I'm just going to go home. Maybe me coming here was a mistake." Alex said getting up from Miles' lap.

"Alex no," Miles said grabbing for the younger man's wrist.

"You have your friends here. You don't need me," Alex said, turning to Miles with a sad smile. "You guys have fun." He pulled his hand away heading towards the stairs, leaving Miles to scramble to his feet to grab him again.

"Al," He muttered, catching him with a strong arm around his waist. "C'mon baby don't be like that. Are you really that uncomfortable?" He said against Alex's ear so that he could hear over the music without Miles' having to shout, cluing everyone into their conversation. Alex shivered hearing Miles called him baby one other time. That was when he thought that he was- Alex shook the thought away which Miles took as him shaking his head. "Alright, if you want to go then let me get you a cab home. There's no way I'm letting you take the train looking like that. You can even just go over to my place if you want to. I won't stay long without you. I'll make the rounds them come back and we can have some fun."

 

"Why? You have Jay here. I'm sure he would love to have you to himself for the night." Alex shrugged.

"Jeff is already on the prowl, he's decided Jay is his prey now," Miles said.

"... Come dance with me and I'll think about staying," Alex said. He really does want to have a good time and away from everyone else he might be a bit less nervous. He didn't care about the strangers that might see him dance.

"I think dancing is a great idea," Miles said, grabbing Alex's hand and pulling him downstairs and onto the dance floor.

Alex likes dancing. He likes the feeling of the way the bass thumps. It feels like he's in a trance, the pulsations moving his body for him in time with his feet. He still was a bit tightly wound, looking around in the crowd for any familiar faces, but he didn't see any for the time being. He started swaying his hips but they felt rather out of sync. He actually found himself to still be a bit sore from his lesson with Miles a few days prior. Miles has seen the way Alex dances before. The way he had seemed so fluid on the night they met, like an ethereal goddess. He'd caught glimpses of that grace in the times he'd used him as a model but it didn't ever seem to have quite the same effect.

"You really do need to loosen up a bit love," Miles told him. "Would you like to try something?" He asked.

"Try what?" Alex asked, turning around to face Miles. Miles reached into his pocket and pulled out a small baggie containing several brightly colored tablets. This came as a shock to Alex.

"So you'll give me pills, but I can't have a drink?" Alex asked with his hand on his hip.

"Yes, if you're caught drinking with us then Matt will be the one to get in trouble as will the club. We won't be allowed to have parties here anymore and we're all rather fond of this place. No one's going to see the Ecstacy." Miles smirked. Alex could actually see the logic in that. So it wasn't about keeping him from getting intoxicated?

"Is Alexa going to yell at me for this?"Alex asked.

"No, She's already asked me for two." Miles shrugged.

"Is this why you were talking to Jamie the other day?" Alex had been wondering why he'd been around.

"Ah, you saw that? No, I was wondering if he had done anything to locate Owen." Miles sighed.

"Have you found him?"

"Alex, can we not have this conversation in the middle of the dance floor please?" Miles insisted. The answer was 'no' and he doesn't want to think about the implications as to why. "Do you want the pill or not?" Miles asked, popping a green and blue one into his mouth like they were candy.

"Yeah... Yes, I want to try it." Alex nodded. It was just ecstasy after all. Alex knew plenty of people that had tried it before. Besides, Miles wouldn't give him anything that would hurt him right? Miles moved in quickly pressing his lips to Alex's, pushing his lips apart with his tongue and slipping the pill that remained in his mouth over to Alex before pulling away.

"Swallow." He instructed. Alex did, he wasn't at all fond of the chemical taste on his tongue.

"What were you going to say if I said no?" Alex asked.

"I'd have just taken both." Miles laughed. " You should start to feel that in about an hour or so." Alex nodded, he was curious to know what it was going to feel like. Would he be able to notice the change in being high?

"What's it going to feel like?"

"The music will sound better, you'll feel a difference in the way that it hits your body. Touch is different too. You'll feel happy, talkative, it will take the shyness right out of you." Miles laughed.

"What do you mean touch is different?" Alex questioned. Miles just gave him a knowing smirk.

 

"You'll see when it kicks in."

Miles was right as he started to come up Alex was quite sure that he'd never felt something like this before. It felt like his skin was electrified, but in a way that was different from how Miles set him on fire. It was as though he was melting into the lights and sound around him becoming one with the sea of bodies. Though he could no longer define where the other people started and he began there was one thing he was very sure of and that was he knew exactly where Miles was. Miles was right behind him grinding against his bum which he pushed back for the feeling of the friction. He fingertips rested just below the waist of his too tight shorts. Occasionally they would travel a little further down but never quite far enough to give him what he wanted. His mouth was sucking on both skin and the candy beads around Alex's neck. Occasionally he would pull the elastic back and let it snap back into place against the once pale flesh that was now bruised in several places.

 

"You doing alright?" Miles asked when he could tell Alex was starting to loose touch with what was around him.

"Mhm, feels great!" Alex said.

"Let's go upstairs for a bit and get you some water. I don't want you getting dehydrated." Miles said, grabbing Alex's arm and pulling the boy towards the outer edge of the crowd. Alex didn't mind following. It's easy to tell that water isn't the only thing on Miles' mind and that's just fine with Alex. When they return to the VIP room hardly anyone from the group earlier was around.

 

"Where did everyone go?" Alex asked.

"Probably downstairs to dance," Miles told him as they rounded the corner, much to his surprise there was a boy in black pants that may have been closer to leggings and a sleeveless hoodie covered in glowing neon blue stars. With his hood up Miles can't tell who it is, but he has a pretty good idea. Alex, on the other hand, doesn't have a clue. All he knows for sure is that it's Jeff who's got one hand grabbing the man's bum while they were making out.

Miles was about to suggest that they go back downstairs when Alex starts walking over to the other two. He wants to take some time to get to know Jeff while he's not feeling so shy. "Here, drink this," Miles said, grabbing a water bottle off the table and handing it to Alex. Alex quickly cracked it open and gulped down half in a matter of seconds before deciding it would be best to dump the rest over himself, enjoying the cool feeling against his hot skin and washing away some of the sweat from dancing. Miles couldn't help but lick his lips at the sight, watching the beads of water slide down Alex's face and neck. He looked up through his slightly damp curls as he shook them out of his face. "what?"

"I refuse to believe that you don't know how sexy you are," Miles muttered biting his lip.

"I wasn't trying to be sexy, I just thought it might feel good." That's a lie, Alex thought that it might look good too if he pulled his little stunt off right. Apparently, it has worked just the way he'd intended it to. This is reconfirmed when he feels someone pull back his shorts and stick a dollar in them, snapping the elastic in the waistband,

"I agree with Miles." It as Jeff... Jeff gave him the dollar.

"Excuse you! Hands off Jeffery!" Miles snapped, sitting down next to Alex and pulling him into his lap and away from Jeff's claws. " You already have the other one." He laughed. It's only then that Alex noticed the excitable boy in the star hoodie is actually Jay who has his face buried in Jeff's neck with a huge smile.

"He's being rather agreeable tonight. Must be high." Jeff joked.

"Hi there Jay," Miles said, reaching over to push his hood back causing the boy to laugh. Alex has never seen Jay in such a good mood. He is rather good looking when he's smiling rather than glaring at him.

"Hi." He replied between a fit of giggles. He pulled himself away from Jeff leaning over him. He reached for Miles' hair to realize it wasn't there. "WHERE'S YOUR HAIR?" he asked.

"I-" Before Miles could tell Jay that he'd cut it he was grabbed by the neck and being pulled in for a bruising kiss. At first, Miles thought that he might just like the look until Jay bit down on his lip leaving his bleeding. "Hey hey, stop that. How much have you had tonight my Star boy?" He pushed Jay back so he was no longer leaning over Alex, squishing him in between them. It was obviously a territorial move. Alex got up from his place trapped in the middle. Two could play at that game.

"HE'S A MOTHER FUCKIN' STARBOY!" Jeff yelled.

 

"Then what does that make me?" Alex asked, sitting on Jeff's other side as Jay made himself comfortable between Miles and Jeff.

"A little kitten of course." Jeff joked, flipping the switch on Alex's cat ears so they started to flicker.

"No, kittens are too innocent. Do I look innocent to you?" Alex asked, biting the tip of his index finger and winking at Jeff. It could be the drugs talking, or the fact that Jay is trying to mark Miles as his, or it could also be that 'Hot Jeff' is hot.

"Can't say that you do in that outfit. Your Daddy let you leave the house dressed like that?" Jeff smirked, turning to face Alex.

"I think he rather likes when I dress like this. He's been rubbing his dick all up on me all night," Alex bragged, catching Jay's eye as he said it.

"Because Miles is easy. He likes any sweet little thing who'll grind on him. Some of us are a more particular about our conquests." Jeff smirked.

"I hope you're not including yourself in that. You're almost as bad as I am. You'd rather stick your dick in Jay then your own boyfriend." Miles commented.

"I don't get to have my way with him very often anymore since I'm not wearin' your collar. I don't get to see my playmate. He's been complaining that he misses our time together," Jeff said although his eyes are piercing into Alex.

"I'd rather have your attention though, Mi," Jay said, running his hand over Miles' head. Alex can see instantly the way Jeff's face falls when he hears it, but it's obvious that Jay doesn't notice at all. To try and cheer him up Alex stole Jeff's hat and replaced it with his kitty ears. Jeff was about to complain about them but instead, he just pulled Alex closer whispering to him.

"Do I make a good Cat?You look awfully cute in my hat."

 

"They look silly on you, you need black ones." Alex laughed.

"Those would suit me. I'm a Panther after all. I would be careful if I were you. You're not ready to play with the big cats just yet little kitten." Jeff said. Although he may joke about it, he would never step on Miles' toes when it comes to training Alex.

"We were just together last night," Miles said bringing attention back to their conversation. Jeff's slightly raised mood was short lived thanks to it, Jay's comment coming back to settle in his mind but nothing hurts more then what he says next as he makes a point to look towards Alex before he speaks.

"But Mi, you told me you loved me last night. I waited so long, why wouldn't I want your attention. Jeff is just a friend." The remark hurts Alex's heart and ego, but it couldn't be true... could it? Miles WASN'T in love with Jay, which he had to remind himself to keep from getting jealous. It didn't help much though. Sure, Miles probably preferred Jay because he was actually having sex with him, and they had known each other for substantially longer. Still, Alex wanted to think that he was special. Even just the slightest bit. Miles was spending an awful lot of time with him. When they weren't together Miles talked to him constantly throughout the day. He was the new favorite, wasn't he? So why would Miles tell Jay that he loved him?

"Jay you know what I meant," Miles says, flashing a quick sympathetic look to Jeff who looked rather betrayed. There was a moment of silence before Jeff changed the direction of the conversation.

"Miles, did I tell you we ended up putting an offer on that two bedroom place in Tribeca we were looking at?" He asked.

"Really? No, Jay failed to mention that to me. Do you think they're going to accept?" Miles asked, glad to chance the topic. He reached for Alex, grabbing his arm and trying to pull him back to his side. Luckily Jay didn't get in the way and leaned back against Jeff. Sure, he wants Miles' focus on him, but he knows he won't have it tonight so Jeff would have to do. Jeff is plenty used to being second choice. Sure, he has his own relationships, his own submissive who would give him their undying love and devotion any time that he asks for it. That didn't matter they were a temporary solution.

"Not sure just yet. We're trying to get their asking price down a bit, but we're pretty fond of the location so we'll go up if we have to." Jeff shrugged.

"Gets me back on this side of the water, I'm tired of living in Brooklyn," Jay added, reaching for an open beer that sat on the table already half consumed and taking a swig. He made a face as he did. "I don't think this was mine and I can't tell if there are drugs in it or if it just tastes like piss." He commented taking another sip.

"So you continue to drink it? What if it's been roofied?" Jeff asked taking the beer out of Jay's hand.

"Well, if it was a roofie I wouldn't be able to taste it now would I?" Jay insisted. "That's the whole point is to not know that it's there besides if I pass out you'll get me home." As this conversation is playing out in front of Alex he's trying to wrap his mind around it.

"Wait wait wait, so you two are going to live with together?" He asked, trying to get the facts straight. Had he missed something?

"Yes obviously, we're past that already and we've moved on to drugs in the beer. Do try to keep up Alex." Jeff commented, sipping it himself. "Think you might be right about that, there's something off about it. Miles, what do you think? I can't quite put my finger on the taste but it's familiar." He asked, passing the drink down to Miles.

"Yeah, agreed it's in the aftertaste." Miles agreed.

If the sounds in Alex's head could be heard aloud it would sound something like the ticking of a clock. Maybe it's due to the drugs he's ingested that are starting to take full control of his brain, but what spills from his mouth next comes as a surprise to everyone. "I don't understand you people AT ALL. Do you torment yourselves on purpose? Like ok I get it you're into all this sadism masochism thing, whatever, but does it make you stupid after too long or something? Because you obviously enjoy ruining your own lives. Jeff, why the hell would you move in with Jay just to watch him endlessly pine over Miles? Jay, wake the fuck up Jeff is in love with you. Miles is NOT! Miles if you're still so hung up on Eugene why don't you stop screwing around with Jay and just call Eugene's parents or something. I bet you anything they know where he is. And for FUCK SAKE IF YOU THINK THERE ARE DRUGS IN THAT WHY DO YOU KEEP DRINKING IT?" He yelled the last part taking the bottle from Miles and tossing it to the floor breaking it. "Now, my body feels really fucking weird cause of that stuff you gave me. I was under the impression that we came back up here because one of us was about to get their dick sucked and I would really like to get back to that."

Everyone was stunned, some for reason's different than other. Miles wasn't sure if he should be upset at him for misbehaving or turned on by this change in attitude. Mainly he was the latter. Jeff might have been amused if Alex hadn't just blurted out something he'd been trying to keep a secret for years. Jay though, Jay was already on his feet and halfway to the stairs. "You going to go after him?" He asked Miles.

"No, it's probably best if you do." Miles sighed, turning his attention back to Alex who was already getting comfortable straddling his lap. Jeff merely nodded and headed towards the stairs, trying to keep his eyes on Jay's glowing hoodie so he wouldn't loose him in the crowd.

"Sorry, I'm not sure where that came from," Alex muttered once they were alone again. It's almost too soft or Miles to hear his words over the music.

"It's the drugs, they make you say things you wouldn't normally, but you're absolutely right," Miles said. He'd rather Alex not speak anymore though, so he pressed their lips together to silence him for the time being.

Left alone together in the otherwise crowded club things heated up quickly. Miles had been right about the way his sensitivity to touch changed. As the drugs hit their peak Alex was feeling incredibly sensitive. He tried desperately to scratch the nagging itch inside him but no amount of grinding his hips against Miles was doing anything to quell his need. He was desperate for more. "Fuck me." He whimpered against Miles ear loud enough to be heard over the music.

"Sorry, what?" Miles asked pulling away when Alex went to attack his lips again.

"I said fuck me. You want to, don't you? I wanna try it. You can have me right here if you'd like." Alex says, turning his attention to sucking the exposed skin on Miles' neck and running his hands down his shirtless torso. Miles is now faced with a difficult decision that really has only one answer. Of course he's not going to do it! Alex is high! Although he would love nothing more than to ravage the younger man he's not the soulless bastard everyone seems to make him out to be. He sighed, grabbing Alex's tousled locks and gently pulling him back away from the skin that is undoubtedly bruised with love bites.

"Alex, I think it's about time I take you home."Miles sighed, rubbing his arms over the boy's shoulders.

"Why? I'm having fun! I guess your bed would be more comfortable than trying to do it right here.' Alex nodded. "But I like the music and the lights!"

"We're not having sex tonight, love. Not while you're high." Miles told him as he smoothed down Alex'sflyways. "I think it would be best if I get you back uptown and we get you in bed. You've had enough excitement for the night." He said firmly although he bites his lip subconsciously because Alex is still grinding against him and damn does it feel wonderful, especially in those tight little shorts that may end up being the death of him.

"But Miles! Don't you want me?" Alex protested, pressing his hips down a bit harder and gently sucking Miles' ear lobe. "C'mon, I know you wanna fuck me, daddy." He giggles because even high he still can't call Miles daddy without wanting to laugh. "Please?"

"I'm not going to let you do something you're going to regret in the morning. You've been telling me that you aren't ready-"

"But I AM ready!" Alex insisted.

"Alex, that's just the drugs talking, not you." Miles tried to reason with him. Sure, he's high as well, but he also is far more in control then Alex is due to a much higher tolerance level.

"If I regret it then that's my own fault. C'mon Miles, please? I'll let you do anything you want to me. Show me what you do to the other boys. I promise I'll be good." Alex begged.

"... We'll talk about this when we get home. Do you have your keys?" Miles asked.

"What? Why can't we just go to your house?" Alex complained.

"Because you need to sleep in your own bed, Alex." Miles sighed. He wants to do what's right by the smaller boy no matter how difficult it's becoming to say no.

"... I don't have the keys. Alexa has them we just brought the one set cause I didn't know where to put them in these shorts.That and we both figured I'd be leaving with you." Alex finally gave in looking down at his lap with a defeated sigh.

"Good, I'll go get them. You stay here alright?" Miles said, removing the boy from his lap so he could get up. "Stay right there. Don't move a muscle, and don't talk to anyone you don't know? Understood?" He asked. "Or you're going to be in trouble and I'll slap your bum so hard you won't be able to sit for days."

"I won't but only if you promise to do that anyways." Alex winked, making himself comfortable on the sofa to wait while Miles went to look for Alexa.

Miles was glad to escape for a moment. He'd find Alexa and head to the bathroom to get some much-needed relief quickly. Not that there was anything that could be done to change his mind, but it might help his resolve if he wasn't so eager to get off. Between the drugs in his system and that sinful way Alex's hips moved he'd been dying to do something, anything to get the satisfaction he was craving.

It doesn't take long to find Alexa, she's glowing under the florescent lights to he's able to spot her from across the room.

"Miles! Where have you been? Where's Alex?" She asked, taking a sip of her drink and throwing one arm around her friend's shoulder.

"He's upstairs. I'm going to go ahead and take him home, I think he's had enough for the night." Miles sighed.

"Yeah, sure! Wore him out did you?" Alexa asked, retrieving the apartment key from inside her bra.

" I think so. The Ecstacy might have been a bit strong for him too. He's started saying he wants me to fuck him." Miles said.

"Might be that, or it might be that Nick has already beat him to it. He probably doesn't want to get left behind." Alexa shrugged. That hadn't occurred to Miles since he'd only met Nick the one time and hadn't been a part of that rather private conversation that Alex has shared the details of with Alexa. So maybe Alex wanting to loose his virginity had nothing to do with actually being ready but instead simply wanting to because his closest friend had! "You're not going to do it are you?"

"No, course not. If he wants to talk about it sober then we will but not tonight." Miles said. "So I'll just go wank in the bathroom then take him home."

"... You're a pervert." Alexa rolled her eyes with a disgusted look.

"Of course I am! Toodles love." He said, taking the keys and walking off in the other direction.

 

"Hey Mi," Alexa said grabbing Mile's wrist. "Make sure that you take care of him ok? I know you will." Miles nodded with a small smile and headed off in the other direction.

He makes it to the clubs usually crowded bathroom. Under the dim red lights that illuminated the long narrow space Miles spotted a familiar face standing bent over a sink and staring into the mirror. "Did you find Jay?" He asked sauntering over to Jeff past the row of men at the urinals.

"Jesus Miles didn't anyone ever tell you not to sneak up on a man in the bathroom." Jeff startled turning around. As he faces him Miles sees the blood running down Jeff's face from his nose. "I did find him. He hit me. I don't think that he's mad, he's just confused and upset I guess. He didn't say much there was a lot of incoherent shouting and accusing me of lying and then he punched me in the nose and left."

"Didn't think he had it in him." Miles want to laugh but he knows it's better not to. Jeff, on the other hand, does start laughing in a way that puts Miles slightly on edge.

"I didn't either but... He's not been himself lately, Miles." Jeff sighed, wiping a fresh trail of blood from his nose. "You've hurt him badly this time. He's depressed."

"I know. I've upset the balance in our happy little family." Miles sighed. "I guess yesterday was my attempt to rectify things."

 

"So you telling him that you love him was just some shot in the dark that you were hoping might slap a bandage on him? Like this can all be cured if you keep lying to him? Miles, he's worth more than that and he sure as hell deserves better than you...I'd give him everything if he would just love me back." Jeff sighed. "But... You ruin everything Miles you ruin EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH and you don't seem to care."

"You know there was a time that we were all happy." Miles points out.

" 's been a while." Jeff said as he leaned back against the sink. "You know when we were younger you used to care about people. You'd never treat Jay the way that you do now... You treat him like he's worthless, you treat me like shit, you're going to be the death of Owen." Jeff continued. "And then you bring this kid Alex into it-"

"I thought you liked him?" Miles said. "Seems like you did earlier."

"Oh I do, but I think he's going to turn everything on its head again. It's just like when you and I met Jay, or when you brought Eugene to live with you." Jeff said, "And just because I love a bit of chaos doesn't mean that I don't miss the old days." He says with a small smile that turns into a dark glare as his nearly black out eyes catch onto Miles lighter honey ones. "Do you love him?"

"Of course, but not like-"

"No, you know damn well what I'm asking you. Do you love him like the way I love him?" Jeff knows the answer, but he wants to hear it from Miles' mouth.

"No," Miles said bluntly.

"Then mark my words," Jeff said grabbing Miles by his collar throat since he had no shirt to clutch onto and slamming him into a stall door. "You ever lie to him again and I'll fucking gut you, Kane." It's not hard to believe that he's telling the truth. Needless to say the scrappy little street punk from Manchester would have been perfectly capable of making good on such threats when they'd first met. Surely he was just as capable now, but Miles knows him better than that.

"You wouldn't hurt me, Jeffery. Not even over him." Miles smirks as if to bait him before crashing his lips into Jeff's, pulling him into the bathroom stall.

Alex was getting tired of waiting. He was alone in the VIP lounge, stretched out on the couch, staring at the ceiling. The way the lights reflected across the smooth surface created patterns that started to morph back and forth in a way that seemed unnatural. He sat up, looking at his hands, and at the purely black floors. The morphing, although subtle, continued proving to him that it wasn't just a trick of the light. He rubbed his eyes trying to make it stopped and started to grow anxious when he couldn't. He stood up trying to shake off the jittery feelings in his body.

He paced for what felt like an hour when in reality it had only been about fifteen minutes or so. It's entirely logical that Miles could still be looking for Alexa, but every second that ticked past seemed to last an eternity to Alex who's mind was going entirely too fast for his liking. He wanted to go and look for Miles, or at least one get hold of someone familiar who might be able to help him locate the older man. Going home was starting to sound like better and better of an idea to Alex who was ready to curl up in his own bed and wait for all of this to subside.

"Stupid Miles. Silly, stupid Miles." He repeated a few times as his mind had gotten itself sucked into a bit of a loop. He walked down the stairs leading to the dance floor, stopping halfway in his descent to scan the room but he couldn't make out any distinct features of the people below. He stumbled a bit through the hoard of dancing bodies. As he made his way deeper and deeper into the mass he realized too late that this may have been a bad idea. Everything around him was far too warm. He needed out, but the door was on the other side of the room and he couldn't fight through any more of the people nor did he want to stumble out onto the street alone and be denied reentry. Regardless, he needed to breathe. He saw the light illuminated not far from him for the bathroom. That would at least offer a bit of relief from the crowd. Maybe he could splash some water on his face and try to sober himself up a bit. Then he'd try to make his way back upstairs to wait for Miles. Coming downstairs had been a mistake.

He went to push the swinging door open as someone else was coming out causing the door to slide in the other direction leaving him to lurch forward and fall into a man was standing at a urinal.

"Hey, kid! Watch where you're going." He snapped.

"Sorry, s-sorry." Alex tried to get away from the man and reeling back into an unlocked stall door. He quickly pushed inside with the intent of locking himself in until he regained competition. Until he heard a moan he was quite sure that he heard before behind him. "M-miles?"

The man's eyes sprung open and Jeff's head spun around to look at Alex who was now backed into the door staring at the pair in shock. "Aw hell Alex, didn't I tell you to stay put?" Miles rolled his eyes pulling away from Jeff and buttoning his pants. How on earth had Alex found himself in this situation? If he's honest he probably would have found walking in on Miles and Jeff arousing if not for the way he currently felt.

"I... I couldn't I...was..." There's too much going through Alex's head and none of it is able to be put together in rational ways at the moment.

"Well look what the cat dragged in. I'm going to get a drink. If you want to finish this later you know where to find me." Jeff said, reclasping his belt and winking at Miles and Alex as he walked past them and out of the stall.

"You didn't listen to me, Alex." Miles frowned. " I don't like being disobeyed." He puts a hand next to Alex's head, leaning on the door behind him to keep it shut. As he gets closer and closer to Alex's face, hovering over him Alex started to sink down.

"I don't feel well. I want to g-g-go..." Alex tried to get out. Miles sighed, he can't tell if Alex looks flushed or not under the crimson glow of the darkened room.

"Let's get you out of here." He nodded, reaching for Alex's hand.

It takes a bit of time to coax Alex through the crowd and out to the door into the street. It had started to drizzle a bit outside. The streets smelled of wet cement a scent that Alex had always been fond of. A few people stood under the outside awning of the club huddled close together to stay out of the elements as they smoked. Miles spotted Alexa and guided Alex towards her. She was standing with Jeff and Matt smoking. "Oh goodie you're out here that does make this so much easier." He says reaching to take her cigarette. "Here, take your key. I'll take Alex over to mine. It's closer and he's not feeling well." He holds out the key to Alexa then turns to Jeff. "And you, why aren't you on a train to Brooklyn already?"

"I'll give Jay until morning to cool off before I try showing up on the doorstep." Jeff shrugged.

"Right, well, call me and let me know how he is after you speak to him will you." Miles asked.

"Why don't you come with me? We'll go in the morning, we can pick up coffee from that little place he likes in Park Slope like we used to. Might cheer him up some." Jeff suggested.

"Maybe another day. I've got to look out for this one." Miles said, looping an arm around Alex's shoulder to pull him closer to kiss his sweat damp hair. "Those tabs were a bit speedy tonight and I think it's too much for the little darling to handle isn't it?" Alex whined and hid his face in Miles' shoulder. "No, he's not feeling well. I should be there in the morning when he comes down." Alexa smiled glad that Miles is taking responsibility for Alex.

"Alright, night you two." Alexa said waving them off.

"C'mon Al, let's get a cab." Miles suggested, taking his hand again.

"Can't we walk? The rain feels nice." Alex asked. It felt cool against his skin in such a pleasant way. By the time they get home Alex is feeling mildly better although now what little clothing he's wearing is soaked to his skin. Normally Miles wouldn't let him walk around outside dressed like that, nor would he walk down the street in nothing more than pants, but it's not far from the club to his apartment. When they get off the elevator Alex immediately starts to strip his clothes off. First sneakers are kicked to the side by the door, then his shirt is left in a sopping heap on the rug, his shorts follow a few feet later as he keeps walking towards Miles bedroom.

When Miles reaches the doorway Alex has already managed to wrap himself up in the bedspread leaving only a tuft of hair protruding from underneath. "Alex," Miles calls his name as he sits on the bed next to him, putting a hand gentley on his back.

"Go away, I'm angry with you." Alex snapped, sticking his head out from under the blanket.

"Why are you angry with me love? It didn't seem like you were when we were still at the club." Miles pointed out.

"You left me all alone. You said you'd be right back, and instead you went and fucked Jeff! You won't fuck me, nooooo not even when I'm begging for it. You think you're some sort of saint because you won't touch the little virgin boy when he's fucked up, but you're not! You're really not! So what is it? I'm not good enough so you had to go and stick your cock in something else?" Alex ranted, rolling over to glare at Miles from under the blanket with half of his face still covered.

"Alex, it's not like that. I didn't intend to-"

"Bullshit Miles you don't fuck someone without intending to! You don't just accidentally end up with your dick inside somebody. I don't care that you were having sex with Jeff. I know you're seeing other people, that's fine. I know what I signed up for!" Alex said. "But tonight was mine. You promised me that and you abandoned me high as shit and freaking out and where were you? Busy getting off." Alex growled.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know it would bother you so much. I found Alexa and then ran to the bathroom to... You had me all riled up Al. You're so sexy and I didn't know if I could contain myself." Miles sighed.

"You shouldn't have. You should have just given me what I wanted." Alex complained.

"I can't do that with a good conscience. Consent is so important Alex and you're in not state to give it. You'll thank me for it in the morning." Miles tried to assure him. Alex just made a noise, rolling away from Miles and turning his back to him.

"Still doesn't make it any better." He huffed.

"Try and get some sleep Alex, will you please? We can talk about this more in the morning if you want to but tonight just isn't the time ." Miles sighed.

"I'm not sure that I can." Alex whined. " Still don't feel good."

"Just close your eyes for a bit Alright? I'll stay right here with you until you fall asleep." Miles said, laying down next to Alex.

"...Promise?" Alex asked.

"Of course." Miles smiled as Alex wiggled himself closer to his side. Alex nodded but didn't say anything more.

Miles was surprised by how easily Alex was able to fall asleep even with the drugs in his system but he was glad for it. When he was sure that the boy was asleep he got up from the bed. He took his mobile from the bedside table and walked out into the living room to sit on his couch. He stares at the phone for what seems like a lifetime, watching his thumb hesitate over a button he was unsure he wanted to press. The number staring back at him was one he'd only called a handful of times and hadn't in quite some time. He eventually decides to tap the number to call it, putting the phone to his ear as it rang.

It takes three rings before someone answers. "Hello?" A confused female voice cut through from the other end.

"H-hi Mrs. McGuinness... um it Miles, Miles Kane. I was wondering if you might know where Eugene is." Miles asked.

"He's visiting right now, but he's out at the moment. Did you want me to pass on a message?" The woman asked. Miles heart nearly stopped. Eugene was there. For the first time in a year and a half he knew exactly where the other man was. He could have been the one to pick up the phone had Miles called at a different time.

"No, that's alright. Sorry to bother you." Miles sighed.

"Alright, I'll let him know that you called. Good to hear from you again love. Be safe." And with that, the call was disconnected. Leaving Miles alone in silence.

What had he just done?


	8. Sunday Morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: (Insert loving genuine apology for lateness here) So I've been super excited about this chapter and the direction it's going to start to push the story in.Originally this and what will be the next chapter were supposed to be all in this chapter but it was running too long and things never see to turn out how I plan them. Oh well. After this next few weeks updates should start coming out quicker again since I'll be going back home after two months away helping me mom to move my grandmother out of her house and into assisted living. It's been a lot of stress,but soon it's going to be back to business as usual with more frequent updates!
> 
>  
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Your comments make my day so let me know what you think. Love you all <333  
> Also if any of you use Insta or Tumblr come talk to me. I love meeting new people in the fandom.  
> IG- Augustine_blues   
> Tumblr- Augustineblues

The barest hint of a lighter blue had just begun to mix with the glow of the street lamps lining the sloping streets of south west Brooklyn. Ever since arriving there almost an hour before Jeff had been walking circles around Jay's block deciding what exactly he wanted to say to him. He'd been smoking like a chimney, blowing his way through nearly two packs by the time he finally got the nerve up to approach the brick-faced rowhouse.

Unlike the the apartments most of their other friend's lived in across the river in Manhattan the building looked more like a residential home that might belong to a family consisting of three floors, each of which had its own apartment as well a basement the entrance to which was underneath the concrete stoop where Jeff stood debating if he wanted to ring the second floor buzzer labeled 'Sharrock/ McGuiness'. Jeff wasn't sure if Jay had left it that way out of nostalgia or sheer laziness as Eugene hadn't lived there with him in nearly three years. There had been no reason to change it. Jay had not gotten another roommate once Eugene had gone to live with Miles. He didn't need the help to keep the rent paid. So, other than George living with him for a short time after an unfair eviction, he'd been enjoying his solitude. It hardly mattered now, he would be moving soon anyway.

Jeff took a deep breath and pressed the button and watched through the glass cut out at the top of the door for Jay to appear on the stairs. It takes several minutes before he decides to show his face. He'd long since changed out of his rave clothes replacing them with Jeans and a baby blue hoodie. As he came closer Jeff noted the lack of makeup and glitter in his hair indicating that he'd showered. Having come straight to Brooklyn Jeff looked haggard by comparison. His hair was it's usual curly mess. He was still dressed in the same clothes from the night before. He'd tried in vain to wash off some of the war paint he'd had on his face but the white streaks had just made him look paler than usual.

Jay rolls his eyes when he see's Jeff waiting on the steps. "What do you want?" He asked as he leaned against the opened doorway blocking the entrance.

"I've been pacing around out here trying to figure out what to say to you for hours." Jeff sighed.

 

"I know, I've been watching you through the window," Jay said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Then why didn't you let me in. it's chilly out here." Jeff complained. It was much cooler out than it usually was that time of the year even for so early in the morning especially due to their close proximity to the waterfront.

"Who says I'm going to let you in now?" Jay asked. He's still upset about what had transpired the night before.

"Look... will you just... let's go for a walk or something and talk?" Jeff suggested. He knows since he's still coming down most likely Jay is as well and a walk will help to alleviate some of their jitters. "I'll even get buy you breakfast from that little bakery up by the park if you want. They were opening up just as I was coming down the block the last time."

Jay thought carefully for a moment weighing his options. He really has no reason to be angry with Jeff. Jeff isn't the one who hurt him, not really. That, and he does feel a bit bad about the small red droplets of dried blood that now dotted some of the white spots on Jeff's striped T-shirt. "Fine, I want those weird bright colored things that you always say are bad for me." He said, reaching to grab his shoes from the shelf next to the door.

"Anything you want, Jay. Anything you want." Jeff said perking up a bit.

Soon he was regretting those words as they sat under their favorite tree atop the hill that sunset park was known best for. The park was all but empty other than maybe a jogger or two this early in the morning. At the bottom of the hill, people on their way to the train station could be seen filing in and out of the bakery or the bodega on the opposite corner. Occasionally they would hear the not too distant sound of one of the store fronts along 5th Avenue raising their metal gates and flipping on the lights to start their day.

One of the reasons that Jay had chosen this neighborhood was for its park and the great view of the city that it provided. From the crest where they sat, the lower Manhattan skyline shot up just across the water. The views coupled with the reliable trains, quick commute time, and the fact that the area has yet to be turned into another hipster cesspool had all been appealing. He'd live in the same apartment, on the same block, with the same landlord, and the same tenants on the floors above and below him since he'd first moved to New York. Not many people could boast finding such a stable home which made him reluctant to leave it behind. He was the last member of their inner circle to still live in the outer borough, but now that was all about to change within a few short weeks. Thinking back on the night before Jay was starting to wonder if moving to Tribeca with Jeff really was going to the best thing for him. Jeff's protests soon break him from his thoughts.

"You're horrible! First, you finish my breakfast then you smoke all my weed? Brat," he huffed, taking back the joint that Jay had forgotten was burning between his fingers.

"You said I could have anything I wanted," Jay smirked.

"Yeah, from the bakery! If you wanted my bagel you should have just gotten one of your own!" Jeff complained.

"I'm crashing and I was hungry from all the dancing last night!" Jay insisted. Although he had left early he had arrived at the club with Matt to help him set up for the night's event and had been there from the start. "Besides, aren't you supposed to be apologizing for lying to me?"

"If you should be mad at anyone it should be Miles, not me," Jeff said, taking another toke from the joint and passing it back to Jay.

"But I expect it from him by now. You're supposed to be my best mate, we tell each other everything! So really I'd feel a bit betrayed if you were in love with me and kept it to yourself." Jay said laying his head in Jeff's lap looking up at the colors of the morning sky and trying to pinpoint the exact line where the navy of the night gave way to the blending of purple, pink, orange, and yellow of the early morning sunrise. "So is it true?" He asked.

"What? Don't be daft! I mean of course I love you, but not in the way that Alex was implying. I guess he just saw how you and I are together and came to a conclusion on his own or something that Miles said steered him in that direction. He doesn't know what he's talking about." Jeff rolled his eyes. He knows he shouldn't continue to deceive Jay, but he's worried that if he does tell him the truth that it will ruin their friendship and Jeff isn't ready to let go of him just yet. "I mean sure, I like doing horrible, nasty, depraved things to you, but we're just friends. That's all." he shrugged.

"Yeah, figured as much." Jay didn't seem particularly phased by the news. "Do you ever think that maybe we're perpetuating all the negative stereotypes about gay men? With the clubs, the drugs, the promiscuous sex, the fact that none of us can hold together a monogamous relationship." Jay sighed, stealing the joint back from Jeff.

"I wouldn't know since I'm not a gay man. I'm bisexual rememba'" Jeff said, plucking the joint right from between Jay's lips.

"Uh huh, sure you are. When was the last time you were actually with Arielle?" Jay asked.

"We just did a scene on Tuesday! She's become rather fond of clothespins lately." Jeff responded.

"No, I don't mean like play. I mean full on sex. Cock in Pussy, just pounding that shit," Jay said, punching his own fist for emphasis and trying his best not to laugh causing Jeff to make a face at him.

"Do you need to be so vulgar about it?" He asked.

"It's not half as graphic as some of the things you say to me," Jay continued to laugh. "Now answer my question."

"I dunno! Six months ago, maybe?" Jeff couldn't particularly recall. "The focus of our relationship is primarily non-sexual. I mean sure she gets off on it, but actual sex isn't a part of our scenes usually," He defended. "Although I do like to watch her and George. She's quite good with a strap on and he's pretty fond of it."

"... Well, far be it from me to try and dictate your sexuality but I think you're gay," Jay said.

"Oh? And what other assumptions have you made about me you little twat?" Jeff joked, running his fingers through Jay's long hair.

"I don't think that you actually like Georgie that much. You're not very nice to him. He's always being punished or ignored, it's like he can't get on your good side. You never let him come out with us, he hardly comes to Shadow Play..." Jay sighed, enjoying the feeling of Jeff rubbing his thumb over his favorite spot just behind his ear, knowing full well that it always calmed him.

 

"Alright, that's absolute bullshit. I care very much for George! That just happens to be what he likes. I'd gladly be more liberal with my attention towards him if that's what he wanted, but he'd rather have to beg for it." Jeff shrugged, everyone had their own things they enjoyed. George just happened to be a different breed than Jay. While Jay's interests were mostly pain based a lot George was more psychologically masochistic. He wanted to be ignored, even dehumanized and used as nothing more than furniture and who was Jeff to tell him that his desires weren't right.

"You ignore him for me. You ignore Arielle for me too." Jay pointed out.

"You never seemed to have a problem with it," Jeff said. "Besides you appeal to my violent side." or at least he had until Miles had told Jeff he was no longer allowed to draw blood.

"You're crazy." Jay rolled his eyes. "Why did you ever take on subs of your own if you were plenty happy just screwing around with me?"

"Jay, why are you asking me such hard questions this morning? I dunno, there were a lot of different factors." He huffed. "Mostly I didn't want to wear that stupid collar anymore. I was tired of being under Miles' thumb all the time when he and I were always far closer to partners than me being his submissive." Jeff shrugged. "Love the guy but I wanted more control than I was getting."

"I never really saw him as your Dom back then, it was always more of a second in command sort of feeling." Jay said, "You make a good Dom Jeff." He said putting a hand on Jeff's cheek as he looked up at him. Jeff sighed, kissing Jay's palm before pulling it away from his face.

"Sometimes I think you have more in common with George than you think you do. Seeing as you always choose to give yourself to Doms who ignore you. It's like you're always stuck on the ones who mistreat you," Jeff said.

"I guess I've gotten used to being second best." Jay shrugged.

"You're worth more than second best! So much more. You deserve someone who's going to love you and put you above all else," Jeff said.

 

"Do you think that Alex was right? Miles was lying to me when he told me that he loved me?" He asked.

 

"I dunno, I think there may have been a time when he loved you. When we were younger but now... I'm not sure you'd have to ask him." Jeff isn't about to tell Jay that Miles has flat out lied to him even though he knows it's true. Hearing it from anyone other than Miles will just make him hostile and start another fight. The night before he'd accused Jeff of being Jealous which in truth he was. Jay seemed to be satisfied with that answer. He stayed silent, letting his mind wander away to days where those words could have been something real.

"Easy does it. I've got you little pup. Sssh, you're alright." Miles said as he removed the leather hood from Jay's head. It had a snout and ears on it making it look like the face of a dog. It was a rather pricey apology present from his current Dom who didn't use it near as often as Jay would like. Miles look his tail and hood and placed them on the desk that sat in front of the drizzle covered window of Miles' London Flat.

He returned to the bed with a towel using it to wipe away the sweat on Jay's face. It could get rather hot under the hood, especially when their scenes ended up running longer than initially expected. They'd both been alone and were in a good place with their roles that given day, so neither of them had seen any reason to stop until the sun started to sink lower in the sky and Miles decided that Jay had enough.

He brushed the hair out of Jay's face so that his bangs were no longer stuck to his forehead, using the towel to wipe away some of the remaining wetness. Due to the endorphins still rushing through his body and how deep Jay was in his current headspace he wasn't able to vocalize his appreciation yet so instead, he gladly licked the palm of Miles' hand salty with from the sweat and semen that remained. "You've been such a good boy, but I need you to come on back to me now Jay. Can you do that? C'mon, look at me. You're alright," Miles coaxed as he reached to take Jay's knee pads off. Jay would rather not come down from the euphoric natural high that he's feeling, but he needs to slip back into reality now and Miles will take good care of him while he does.

"T-thanks," Jay said, his voice hoarse and raspy from hours of making nothing other than dog noises. Miles smiled at him, standing up again and walking out into the hall after setting his knee pads down with the hood and tail. When he came back it was with a first aid kit and a cup of water which he handed to Jay immediately.

"Drink it all. We don't need you getting dehydrated." Miles said. Jay was glad for the water which soothed his sore throat as he gulped it down. "It's easier when you don't have to lap it up out of a bowl isn't it?" He joked.

"Can I have some more?" Jay asked finally finding his voice again.

"In a moment love. If you drink too much all at once you're just going to make yourself sick." Miles said kissing Jay for a moment. "Lay on your stomach, let me have a look at you," he told him wanting to see what pieces of his handiwork might need first aid. Nothing seemed to be bleeding at the moment although there were many bruises. They should probably be iced but, many subs experience a drop in body temperature when ending a particularly intense scene so Miles decided that could be addressed later. So instead he pulled out some lotion to help soothe he places where he'd struck the other boy and started to rub Jay down with it across his bum, thighs and back just to relax him a bit until he felt him start to shiver. "Cold?"

"Very..." Jay admitted, he's still feeling a bit disoriented and detached but he's slowly coming back to himself. Miles took the cheetah spotted blanket from the end of his bed and wrapped it around Jay, tucking the edged under him so it was tight against his sides making the slightly loopy boy smile and giggle at the feeling of security it gave him.

"Did you enjoy yourself, Jay?" Miles asked him, trying to get him to be more verbally responsive to him.

"Mhm, fun," he muttered squiggling around in his cocoon a bit in order to get both his head and feet tucked into it.

"Talk to me, Jay. I need you to talk to me." Miles sighed, laying next to the other boy and pulling him closer. Jay immediately rolled over to cling to Miles, pressing his face to the crook of his neck and closing his eyes for a moment.

 

"Tired," He said nuzzling his nose against Miles' clavicle. "You're so much better to me than he is...I feel so good." Miles held Jay a little tighter knowing exactly who he was talking about.

"I don't know why you stay with him..." He sighed. "Liam has never done anything other than abuse you."

"I love him..." Jay shrugged, sending a shiver down his shoulders.

"That doesn't make what he does to your right, " Miles had received one too many calls about Liam Gallagher in the middle of the night to care how Jay felt about him. There was no excuse for the way an older man like him abused the barely nineteen-year-old boy who was currently shaking in his arms. Despite attempts to stop him, Jay kept on going back. He would constantly leave Jay alone after a scene to take care of himself while Liam himself went to get drunk with his mates. He had no regard for Jay's limits and would consistently ignore his safe word to the point where Jay had stopped using it out of fear of being punished.

"I'm fine..." Jay muttered.

"It's not kink anymore Jay. What he does to you is full on abuse. You really should come join Jeff and I with Weller. He'd take good care of you the way he does us! He'd protect you from Liam," Miles insisted. He and Jeff and been trying to convince Jay or nearly a year to come and join them.

Miles and Jeff's Dom, Paul, was a kind older man. Both boys were never happier than when they had his affection which he gave them freely as long as they had earned it. For two young submissives still testing their boundaries and exploring their sexuality, he was the perfect fit. He was able to bring in out the best in Miles and able to rein in the worst of Jeff all the while taking the time to nurture the submissive side in the two boys and teach them how to embrace the dominant tendencies they had.

"Weller won't love me," Jay said gripping tightly to the blanket around him and pressing closer to Miles. "I love Liam. I'd rather have love than safety..."The words break Miles' heart, but coming for such a sensitive boy like Jay he knows that they're unfortunately true. What he says next Miles does find surprising. "If you ever become a Dom, I think I'd like to be yours, Mi. You would be a good Dom," He mutters as he starts to nod off to sleep, exhausted by a day of rigorous activity. Miles Just hugged him a little tighter letting him fall asleep and resisting the urge to whisper to him that he'd love him more than Liam ever would.

"Sometimes I think I get to stuck in the past." Jay sighed looking up at Jeff when the sound of the grate going up at the Super Market across the street started to roll up. He sat up, seeing as the sign reading ' Key Food's' Illuminating in white and red.

"It's best not to dwell on it." If there was a prime example of a man who was able to let go of the past it was Jeff Wootton. In the years Jay has known him he's become an entirely different person. From homeless street vandal, merely a lost boy under the guiding hand of a misguided gutter king named Damon, to a productive member of society. He'd learned to channel his rage into his art effectively letting the past stay behind him. It was a skill that Jay had yet to master. "Some things are worth holding onto, but you have to learn to make that distinction."

"Sometimes you say things that sound so smart that it makes me forget half the things that you say are absolutely stupid." Jay Joked, getting up from the grass. "C'mon why don't we go back to my place. I'm starting to crash and I'm getting tired. I think I could use a good fuck and a nap." he said offering Jeff a hand up.

"Yeah?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at Jay.

"Yeah," Jay replied pulling Jeff to his feet and allowing the other man to kiss him.

As they're walking back down the block to Jay's apartment they both start to notice that something is very wrong. The people standing on the stoop Jay recognized as the older woman who lived on the first floor. One of the neighbors was standing on their porch as well with a cell phone in his hand, and two people appeared to be peering over from across the road. As they got closer they noticed a very familiar tuft of ginger hair sticking up and an ambulance coming down the one way street in the wrong direction to reach the house quicker.

Miles hadn't realized that his he'd nodded off on the couch until the phone in his hand was ringing displaying Jeff's number. "Hello?" He asked in a sleepy tone.

"Miles! You need to get out to Brooklyn NOW!" Jeff yells frantically causing Miles to become much more alert.

"What!? What's wrong? Is Jay ok?" Miles asked.

"Yeah, Jay is fine he's right here with me but we found Owen. He showed up at Jay's in bad shape. We think he overdosed again. They're taking him to Coney Island right now." Jeff told him. Miles would normally never leave the house in sweatpants, but at the moment he couldn't care less all that matters is getting to Owen.

"I'm already on my way." He said, grabbing his keys and running out the door and completely forgetting about Alex sleeping in his bed.

Drives like a madman the whole way out to Coney Island. It's the longest thirty minutes he can remember in his life although he's quite sure that it felt the same way the last time that he'd gone through this with Owen. Luckily it was first thing in the morning on a Sunday so there were few other people on the road. If there had been traffic Miles might have actually cried.

"Where is he?" He asked running into the ER's waiting room and instantly spotting Jeff and Jay.

"They're trying to get conscious again. He looked pretty beat up," Jeff told Miles. "He was still awake when we got to the house, he couldn't really tell us much about what happened though. He was a mess."

"Have they told you anything? Is he going to be alright?" Miles asked. Jeff shrugged.

"Haven't spoken to the doctors yet. No one has told us anything. You're his emergency contact, I'm assuming they'll tell you what's going on." That's usually how things tend to go in these sorts of situations from their experience. Jay, on the other hand, Stayed quiet. He didn't look up from here he was staring blankly down at his hands, his legs jiggling endlessly thanks to his jitters.

"Right, I'm going to go try and track someone down," Miles said, going to talk to the nurses and find out what he could about Owen.

When Alex wakes up he's disoriented and miserable. He feels sick as he sits up in bed looking around in the mostly dark room. There's no one next to him and the sheets are still cold telling him that Miles hadn't come to bed. Alex rolled over and looked at the alarm clock on the bedside table. It had only been a few hours since he'd nodded off. The letters on the clock seemed to be morphing slightly, the shadows on them shifting back and forth as he looked at them making them hard for him to process. It said 7:30 but Alex wasn't sure if his eyes could be trusted. It would be easier to believe if he could tell if the sun was up, but the curtains were drawn over the window.

He slowly managed to make his way onto his knees, crawling to the top the head of the bed to pull back the curtain just enough to see. The rays of the sun, still low in the sky, were reflecting off the mirror like windows of the building across the avenue blinding the boy. He whimpered at the bright flash and fell back pulling the curtain closed. There was no way he was going to leave the confines of the warm bed and dark room.

Alex tried to curl back up under the blanket, but now that he was awake his head was hurting and he couldn't compose his thoughts. Everything in his mind kept looping around in a nonsensical rhythm and all he wanted was for Miles to come hold him and make it all go Away.

"Miiiiiles," Alex called out to him hoping that the other man was somewhere close by. He must be, right? Alex was in his flat after all. There was no answer. "Miiiiiles." He shouted again, louder this time into the silence. After trying once more to yell to him Alex decided to get up, wrapping the blanket around his naked body as he tried his best to keep his legs coordinated as he stood up. He felt drained of energy and uncoordinated as he stumbled out into the living room. "Miles... where are you?" He complained, trying to shield his eyes from the bare windows of the main room.

It didn't take long for Alex to come to the conclusion that Miles had left him alone. Even worse, Alex hadn't taken his cell phone with him the night before because in the revealing shorts that he was wearing there would have been nowhere for him to conceal it. This left him with no way to call Miles and find out where he had gone. Maybe he'd just gone out to get smokes quick. There was a Deli on the corner that sold just about anything you could possibly need, maybe he had just run Over there quickly? Perhaps he had been unable to sleep and was downstairs in the studio? Alex didn't have the stamina at the moment to go and look. He went back to the darkened bedroom, crawling back into bed. Surely if Miles was downstairs he would come up to check on him soon enough.

Alex tried his best to close his eyes. He wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep, but he was finding it hard. The thoughts running through his mind kept looping in ways that he couldn't control repeating themselves over and over without allowing him to fully focus on any of them. The harder he tried the more the more difficult it became, until the storm of repetition was too much for him to take. Alex is tired, he feels sick, and he's panicking because his senses are far too overloaded. Where on earth is Miles? He brought him home with him specifically to be there in case he had trouble coming down which Alex assumes is what's happening. If it's like this every time, then he has absolutely no idea why people like to do drugs.

If Alex thought that he could get up and get anywhere he would go to Nick's. He kicking himself for not having his phone on him the night before, so he can't even call anyone to come get him. Really the person he wants to talk to is Miles to know exactly why he's left him alone in his apartment. The more upset he gets the worse everything else around him starts to seem. Eventually, he gave up trying to control any of it, hiding beneath the blanket and starting to cry.

Back at the hospital Miles hasn't been able to figure out much. None of the nurses had been willing to give him any information other than Owen was indeed alive (for the time being at least) but had been unconscious upon arrival and hadn't woken up yet.

"Here, I uh, got you some coffee..." Miles said sitting in the uncomfortable plastic chair next to Jay and attempting to get the fluffy haired boy to at least look at him. He hadn't so much as acknowledged Miles since he'd arrived at the hospital. He held out the paper cup as a peace offering, but Jay pushed it away.

"I don't want any caffeine. I'm finally starting to get tired and I don't want to ruin it. Jeff said he would take me home once Owen wakes up." Jay said, still looking straight ahead.

"Oh..." Miles takes the cup and puts it on the floor under the seat where he won't be able to knock it over. He spends a moment tapping nervously on the side of his own cup. "So, Jeff said he was with you when Owen showed up..."

"We came back from the park and he was on the porch. Don't know how I'll explain it to Mrs. Hernandez downstairs. Scared her half to death." Jay shrugged.

"Such a sweet woman. How's her-"

"Don't pretend that you care Miles. Really just stop." Jay snapped.

"What do you mean?" Miles asked.

"Every time I bring up the neighbors you always ask me 'how's the dog'. It's because that oversized rat is the only thing you remember about her. If you actually listened or paid attention you'd know that little mutt, that I hated by the way because he used to pee on my boots, died almost six months ago. You hold on to the little bits and pieces of my life away from you to use at the right time to pretend that you know what's going on with me." Jay doesn't want anything to do with Miles at the moment. "When was the last time you actually came to Brooklyn to see me, and I don't mean just to pick me up? What's my favorite take out place in the neighborhood? What's the bar that I like the best outside of the village? And where do I go when I want to think? I bet you can't answer a single one of those questions but Jeff sure as hell can .."

"Yeah... Yeah, I know you're right. I'm sorry, I'm so busy all the time and-"

"Miles... I get it Eugene hurt you bad. I miss him too... sometimes you don't see that but I do miss him too."

"I'm sorry... Jeff is better for you.. if you want to then you should be with him," Miles finally admitted to both himself and Jay though he knew it was true.

"Nah, Alex got his wires crossed. We talked he doesn't love me. This is all so silly. Either way, I don't want him. I want you and I'm fine with us but... I need you to put in a little more. I miss how you used to be. Just be my friend again, please. I don't want every time you and I are together to be about sex or..." Jay sighed unsure of what to say.

"It's not... I apologize for how selfish I've been," Miles admitted.

"Just be around once in a while. Be a part of my life. I know you're busy and I know you're depressed but it's been a year and a half maybe more! It's time to move on with your life. I know your work keeps you busy just... you say you're my friend, be part of my life. I miss that." Jay sighed looking over at Miles and waiting for a response.

"I will. I'll try to do better. I'm sorry. I just wish you'd said something before... and I'm mad at myself for not seeing it." Miles admitted.

"Four months it's been Four months since you were at my place for more than fifteen minutes to come and get me. When I need to think something over I go down to Bush Terminal and sit by the water. Sometimes I'll stay there for hours. I like to go to Hanson's in Fort Green when I don't want to go into the city. Their drinks are cheap, they have a boss garden out back during the summer, it's only one stop down on the train, I get to walk past the Barclay Center on the way there and wish I could play there -"

"You can!" Miles interjected.

"Being a session drummer pays the bills well, but I won't ever be the one they look at," Jay sighed.

"That's a lie. You're so talented..." Miles admitted. " One of the best I've ever known."

"Someday maybe. I like to think when I walk past there on the way to the bar that it's my band's name on the marquee." Jay almost laughed but choked it back with a cough letting Miles pat his back. "Favorite take out is the Chinese place you found out on 8th avenue that you found."

"RIGHT! The Chineses Barbeque place with the ducks in the window that I picked up from the night you first moved into that apartment." Miles remembered.

"The food is good and I have memories attached to it. I'm loyal," Jay laughed. It was a small chuckled that seemed to get caught in his throat.

"Jay... please don't be mad. I'm sorry. I've been awful and you are so much more than I have led you to believe. I'm guilty, I feel guilty." Miles admitted.

"You can make up for it. Jeff was going to help me with painting Mrs. Hernandez apartment for her. Her son is overseas in the navy right now and we could use an extra hand." Jay said.

 

"Name it! Tell me what you want I'll do it," Miles nodded.

"Oh and come to my show next weekend?It's at Glass Lands in Williamsburg." He nodded.

 

"Done, I'm sorry I've been so awful to your... all of you I'm just -'"

"Miles, don't make excuses I've tried to help you, I get it." Jay sighed "Can you just do one last thing for me"

"What?" Miles asked as Jay finally leaned his head against him, yawning because he was exhausted.

"Don't bring Alex to my show," Jay asked. "He's young, he's cute, and he makes me feel bad about myself," He sighed.

"Oh fuck..." Miles muttered. "I ran off and left Alex in my apartment... fuck."

"What?" Jay asked moving his head from Miles' shoulder.

"I left Alex at home. He's never done Ecstacy before and what I gave him last night was cut badly I was supposed to be there with him. FUCK! I got distracted by Owen and left him in my bed fuck." Miles cursed. He was about to walk away and go make a call when Jeff came back.

 

"You know they make the nurses walk down a block to smoke? I got a bit of information. None of them know what is happening with Owen in particular." Jeff sighed. "But they said he sounds similar to a pattern of cases they have seen recently coming in from sunset park. They think there's a group of dealer beating down those who have unpaid debts. Not uncommon right? But apparently, this particular group been giving junkies a shot that's more fentanyl than heroin. They've had nine overdoses in the last two weeks with the same thing Owen came in with. Thankfully they're saying his body is taking it and they likely gave him Narcan to reverse it somewhat but they don't know if he'll slip back in because of the potency of the

Fentanyl." Jeff told them. "If he's alright then he'll be the first one in the group to live."

"Fuck..." Miles muttered. "I'm going to stay here. Jeff, take Jay home. He's tired and needs a good night sleep." He pulled his keys from his pocket. "Are you sober?"

"Yeah, I didn't have much and I'm down," Jeff told Miles.

"Take him home. I'll stay here. I'll call you when I know anything alright? Take my car. I trust you not to crash it." He said tossing the car keys to Jeff.

"I'll come back and get you later," Jeff offered.

"Nah, I'll take the train or a cab back when I leave. Gives me a reason to come get the car tomorrow," Miles said. He has every reason to assume that Jeff will stay with Jay rather than going back to Manhattan. "But will you do me one favor first?"

"Yeah, sure, what?" Jeff asked.

"Wait here a second. I need to call Alexa," Miles replied getting up and gulping down the last of his coffee and taking the one he brought Jay from under the chair he's going to need it.

After a few hours alone Alex had cried hard enough to make himself throw up and had ended in a crumpled mess on the bathroom floor with a towel over him trying to keep warm because he doesn't want to get up. Thankfully he hears the door from the elevator ding open across the flat. "Miles?" Alex called out to him, feeling the words choking in his throat.

"Al! Where are you?" Alex isn't expecting it to be Alex's voice that he hears. He replied simply with a loud whining noise alerting Alexa to his location. "Honey, what are you doing down there?"

"Dunno got stuck..." Alex complained. Alexa sat next to him on the tile floor close enough for Alex to pull himself over and put his head in her lap. "Where's Miles?" Alexa sighed, she knew that question would be coming.

"He's in Coney Island, out in Brooklyn with Jay and Jeff. They're at the hospital with Owen." Alexa said, running his fingers through Alex's hair.

"What happened to Owen?" Alex asked. He's still upset, but slightly less so knowing that there was an emergency. "Is he ok?"

"Not sure yet. He showed up at Jay's after overdosing. It's not the first time it's happened, but apparently, he was in pretty bad shape when he got there. He's still unconscious so they aren't sure if he got there on his own or if someone dropped him there."

"He could have woken me up and told me he was going," Alex grumbled. "I was scared." He added starting to cry again.

"Ssh Alex don't cry. C'mon sweetie lets get you off the floor and get you home," Alexa sighed, pulling the small boy closer. Alex just nodded doing his best to get up off the floor though he's still not feeling the most coordinated. He slipped a bit but grabbed the sink and pulled himself up. "You're not having a very good morning are you?"

"No... I'm never doing ecstasy again." Alex complained as he tried his best to keep the towel he'd been hiding underneath covering himself so Alexa wouldn't have to see him entirely naked although it didn't really matter to either of them.

"Oh, this isn't the ecstasy. This is whatever was cut into it. That batch last night was a bit shady and this isn't something you're used to. Everyone's body reacts differently, especially when you don't know what to expect," Alexa tried her best to explain.

"So, it's not always like this?" Alex asked. Stumbling back into the bedroom and flopping down into the bed.

"No, not at all. The comedown isn't usually pleasant. It's tough to get to sleep, but most of the time it's just a little inconvenient." Alexa shrugged starting to go through Miles' drawers looking for clothes. "Sometimes it can even be almost fun with the right people around, but you being scared and upset is probably not doing you any favors."

"Was I supposed to be calm? Miles abandoned me here alone!" Alex whined.

"Oh don't be so overdramatic. It's not ok that he left you here without saying anything, it really isn't, but he got disturbing news and went running to go check on Owen." Alexa said throwing Alex a pair of sweatpants and an oversized hoodie before leaving the room. Alex sighed pulling them on. At this point, he just wants to go home and hopefully get some sleep although that might be impossible with how bright his room was during the day time.

Miles waited hours, hours, and hours before one of the nurses came and told him that Owen was awake and he was allowed to see him. She gave him a sympathetic look, as this wasn't the first time that she had seen Miles waiting in the ERwith Owen. It also probably wouldn't be the last either.

"Hey..." Miles said unsurely walking into the room. He didn't know what to say to Owen, he never does in moments like this. "How are you feeling?"

"How do you think I'm feeling?" Owen said, choking a bit and coughing as he spoke. "Withdrawals are already giving me hell, particularly my legs..."

"What happened?" Miles asked, although most of it was self-explanatory. He sat down in the chair next to Owen's hospital bed and ran a hand through his hair a comforting gesture that Owen leaned into.

 

"I don't know... I had just come up from Red Hook and I was walking around Third Ave to see if I could make a few bucks so I could score when I ran into one of my guys." Owen said. "I told him I was on my way to see him and he kept asking if I had any money, so I told him I was trying to make a quick dollar before I called him. He told me to just come with him and I ended up going to this tea house that they're using as a front. It wasn't anything weird. I'd been there before. We got high in the basement and I knew almost right away that something was wrong... I guess they intentionally gave me a bad dose because I owe him money," Owen whimpered. "Last thing I remember before going out was a good solid punch to face. Guess that would explain why my nose hurts. So where did they find me this time? How long did it take them to call you?"

"Jeff and Jay found you. You were out in front of Jay's." Miles informed him.

"Fuck, FUCK! That means that they know where Jay lives! Miles, I owe them money. I owe them a LOT of money." Owen said, starting to get panicked. He sat up quickly gripping his side as he did.

"If you were in that much trouble then why didn't you tell me. I would have helped you!" Miles sighed.

"Because you'd be ashamed of me. You're always ashamed of me!" Owen insisted. "And you should be, I'm a fuckin junkie! At least let me retain some of my pride."

"You call sucking dick for speed money and waking up in gutters pride? Owen, I've been begging you for years to let me help you and you have to accept that you NEED the help or you probably won't be so fortunate next time." Miles pointed out. "And now...I need to go call Jay and then, you're going to tell me where I can find these guys, I'm paying off what you owe them, and you're not to go back to sunset park again. Your life is yours to fuck up how you want but I'm not letting you put Jay in danger too because some thugs know where he lives. If anyone touches a hair on that boy's head because of you god so help me, Owen, you don't want to know what I'll do to you."

Miles is absolutely fuming when he leaves the room and Owen knows he has every right to be. He walked outside and a few blocks down away from the hospital to a small Deli that sold loose cigarettes for fifty cents each. He stood outside, the light from the store front window illuminating the now blackened streets of Avenue Z. He pulled his phone from his pocket and calling Jay.

"Hello," a sleepy voice on the other end of the phone answered.

"Hey, you finally get some sleep?" Miles asked.

"Mhm, yeah. How's Owen? Is he awake yet?" Jay asked.

"He is, I just talked to him and he told me something very disturbing..." Miles sighed. " So Jay, I need you to do exactly what I tell you."

"What? Why?" Jay asked rubbing his eyes and sitting up in bed as he tried to wake up some.

"Owen didn't show up at your flat on his own. He was dumped there by dealers from your neighborhood that he owes a debt to." Miles explained.

"What?" Jay asked, the panic rising in his voice.

"Calm down love. I'm just being cautious because I don't want anything to happen to you..." Miles bit his lip. He might just die if Jay got hurt because of someone else, especially someone that Miles kept in their lives despite glaring issues and the potential for dangerous and reckless behavior.

"What do you want me to do?" Jay asked

"Get some of your things, and go back to the city. You can either go stay at my place or go with Jeff I'll leave that up to the two of you. I just want you away from anywhere they could find you just in case, alright?" Miles sighed.

"Ok... ok I can do that. Thanks for telling me. Tell Owen I hope he feels better, ok?" Jay said.

"I will. Is Jeff still with you? I need to talk to him." Miles said.

"Yeah, Yeah, give me a second," Jay sighed. Miles could hear the rustling of blankets and the sound of Jay's voice now turned around from the phone trying to rouse Jeff.

"Mmm, what?" Jeff complain from the other end of the line

"I need you to take Jay back to the city and then meet me back in sunset park. It's urgent, oh and Jeff, bring your gun..."

Nick sat at slurping the bottom of his Chocolate Milkshake out of his cup. "You look like shit," He said, putting the cup down. Currently, he sat across the table from Miles who had a black eye and busted lip.

"Had a run in with some drug dealers, it's a long story," Miles sighed.

"That just sounds like another reason that I shouldn't help you," Nick said taking another bite of his burger.

"I was protecting someone! I had perfectly valid reasons," Miles defended. He hadn't been sure that Nick would agree to meet him. When he'd cracked and finally said yes to it Miles was confident that he would be able to get the information that he needed from Nick which was proving to be much harder than anticipated

"I don't really care about what your excuses are. We're here to talk about Alex," Nick said. He hadn't been inclined to come, but it did mean free food. As a college student, he would be crazy to turn that down. Still, somehow Miles had managed to make Shake Shack taste like betrayal and shame.

"He hasn't spoken to me in over a week. I thought maybe if I gave him a little space he would come around, but that doesn't seem to be the way things are going. Alexa won't let me in the apartment and he's with her most of the time now that he's her assistant." Miles muttered.

"If he doesn't want to talk to you then he doesn't want to talk to you, it's as simple as that. Maybe that's a sign that you should leave him alone," Nick said.

"C'mon Nick, I just want to apologize to him and I need your help to come up with something good," Miles knows that to make up for leaving Alex all alone, but he hasn't been able to come up with anything that Alex would go for.

"I think you're a bad influence on him," Nick admitted, reaching over to pick at Miles' fries because he didn't seem to be interested in eating them himself. Nick had to admit that Miles did seem truly upset about his lack of communication with Alex. It showed in his body language the way his shoulders were slumped, his eyes rimmed by dark circles and his usually fashionable attire shifted to jeans and a t-shirt... Although those loafers were spectacular and if he wasn't so angry with him than Nick would absolutely be asking where he got them. "Do you miss him?"

"Yeah, of course, I do," Miles nodded. "Something special about that one." He's not entirely sure why he missed Alex the way he did, especially after such a short time together, but if he's going to admit it to anyone then it should probably be Nick. Maybe he could sway him with honesty.

"...He's miserable you know. It's got some to do with you, but I don't think he likes being in the city all the time. We're still new here, he's out of his element, and I think he's a bit overwhelmed by how everything is changing. He's all wound up and if you want to make him happy then take him somewhere out of the city and let him run off some of that energy. He likes being out in the woods." Nick said finally giving Miles something that he could work with.

"Well, that shouldn't be too hard. I would never have thought of that." Miles smiling a bit at Nick.

"That's because you don't know him yet." Nick shrugged. "If you want to really start to understand Alex then take him camping, but if you do you need understand that he's not someone you can just walk away from. Alex has been through enough."

"Camping... that works." Miles nodded, the gears in his head are already. Miles had already gone as far as to track Nick down. First,

he'd had to find the right dorm building and then wait until he left for a class to talk to him. It had taken three trips down to the dorm to convince Nick to speak to him. What he didn't know was that Nick was testing him the whole time. As he continued to show up that told Nick all he needed to know.

"Yeah, but you're going to have to figure out how to get him to talk to you. Don't know how you're going to manage that." Nick shrugged. "Although I might be inclined to mention our conversation today to Alexa. I should probably remember to do that tonight since Alexa is leaving in the morning to go to London for work."

"Is that your way of asking me for some sort of incentive to remember?" Miles asked.

"No, Alex being happy is all the incentive I need. I'm trying to tell you that She'll be gone and Alex will be home alone." Nick rolled his eyes.

"Thanks," Miles said smiling at Nick.

"Oh, and if you really want to get on his good side, these Milkshakes are really good and strawberry is his favorite flavor."

Taking the advice from Nick, Miles showed up the next afternoon with Milkshakes and an apology ready. With Alexa gone he could use his keys to get into the apartment, but just walking in might only serve to make Alex angrier, so he stood outside the flat knocking on the door.

Alex had been lying on the couch watching trashy day time television. Nick said that he didn't have time to hang around with him that day thanks to his class schedule and date night with Andy. Alexa was gone for the next several days and Alex was exhausted from all the work he'd been doing to help get her be ready to leave. He got to his feet, taking his time to walk over to the door. He wasn't expecting any company so he couldn't fathom who it could be. When he looked out through the peep hole to see Miles standing in the hallway he debating not answering, but Miles would probably have heard him coming. "What do you want Miles?" He asked from the other side of the still locked door.

"Can we just talk for a second? Please? I come bringing peace offerings," Miles says. Alex doesn't reply but he does crack the door open before walking away from it.

"You're lucky that I was here. Alexa was going to have me go to London with her, changed her mind last minute. I'm not really sure why" Alex said walking over to Miles to see what was in his hand but still keeping a safe distance like a dog that's not sure he trusts you yet. Alex needs to sniff out Miles' intentions a little more first.

"Look, Alex, I'm really sorry for-"

"No, Miles. Just shut up. I don't care what you're sorry for. If I wanted an apology I'd have picked up when you called. I get what happened with Owen was out of your control, but it scared the hell out of me," in more ways than one. Alex isn't willing to explain to Miles the things that go on in his head, but there are certain fears that should never be prodded and Miles had struck the wrong nerve.

"Why did you let me in if you weren't going to let me apologize?" Miles asked.

"Because!" Alex said crossing his arms and leaning against the back of the couch. "Maybe I wanted to yell at you..." Miles can't help but laugh at Alex's answer.

"My god," He said covering his mouth to hold back his laughter.

"What?" Alex huffed, pouting at Miles.

"You are such a little brat! I mean that in the most positive way, I promise." Miles answered getting himself under control.

"You're laughing at me right now? You are INCREDIBLE Miles Kane I swear! You don't even-"

 

"Alright, alright. Calm down, do you want this milk shake or not? I got you strawberry," Alex glared at Miles. He wants to tell him that he won't be bribed with sugary treats and that he sure as hell won't be talked down to like that, but he doesn't trust himself to actually say it so instead he shakes his head and turns his back on Miles so he's not even paying him the slightest bit of attention.

"Well, then I'll just put it in the freezer and be on my way. See, I had this really cool idea for something we could do while you're free over the next few days, but you obviously want nothing to do with me." Miles said walking off towards the kitchen. He walked into the other room and counted to three before he heard his name being called from the living room, and the sound of footsteps following after.

Alex against his better judgment followed because he'd actually really like that Milkshake and being with Miles for the next few days sound much better than sitting alone. Alex doesn't like to be left alone for too long which is part of their problem already.

"So you want to know what I was thinking then?" Miles asked handing over the Milkshake to Alex.

"Yeah, I guess..." Alex said.

"I've got a few day until my next shoot. So I was thinking that maybe we could go up into the mountains for a couple of days. It might be nice to spend some time out of the city," Miles said. Alex loves to camp, and god he would love to get out of town for a couple of days. He's been going a bit stir crazy and his reluctance to explore on his own is only making it more difficult to find things that he likes about New York. The only things so far that he knows he's fond of are the things that Miles has shown him! Well... Miles and Alexa really. Alexa had spent the last two weeks dragging him all over, up and down Manhattan.

"Maybe I could use a break from the city..." Alex said sheepishly looking down at his feet.

"I was thinking that we could drive up tomorrow morning and stay for the weekend. I know just the spot to camp too. I think you'll really like it and it would give us some nice time to get to know each other a bit more... we could really use that." Miles said smiling at Alex hoping to close the deal.

"As long as you promise not to leave me in the forest," It's said almost jokingly but there's part of Alex that does mean it very seriously. He's had enough people walk out of his life that he's becoming a bit sensitive about it, especially when people just up and disappear on him. With Miles' he wouldn't have been as upset if not for the fact that he'd been so scared from the effects of coming down and not knowing what to expect from it. Alexa told him that his paranoia about it had only served to make it worse.

"I promise I won't be out of yelling distance the whole weekend. No phones either. You will have my complete and undivided attention." Miles smiled.

"I'll think about it. Give me until morning to decide?" Alex asked.

"I think I can do that." Miles smiled glad that Alex was warming up a little. "Right then, I'll let you have some space to consider it. Call me in morning alright?"

"Or you could... maybe stay?" Alex asked. "I'm still mad at you," He said, backtracking quickly. "But, this place doesn't really feel like home yet, and I'm not real fond of being alone." Sure, he was alone all the time. Alexa would frequently be out at night or she'd be working and he wouldn't see her at home at all the entire day. That wasn't the same thing. She was still in the city which gave Alex a sense of security. Right now Alexa was across the Atlantic and Nick hadn't answered his text since early that morning.

"Oh, so you want me to stick around while you're having your little temper tantrum?" Miles asked.

"I'm not having a temper tantrum." Alex huffed.

 

"No, that's exactly what you're doing, you got upset so you've been giving me the cold shoulder for over a week now," Miles smirked walking closer to Alex who took a step back.

"I've been ignoring you because I didn't want to talk to you, you twat!" Alex snapped. It's true. He'd been much madder during the first few days. Most of it had dissipated over the last week or so. Still, he wanted to be mad at Miles to show him that he wouldn't stand being abandoned like that without so much as a word of warning. Yes, Miles had been worried about Owen, but how hard would it have been to have told Alex he needed to go and take care of it or have called Alexa on his way there instead of leaving Alex crying alone for several hours first?

"Oh, Alexander, you really ought to watch your language little darling," Miles smirked.

"And what are you going to do it I don't?" Alex asked, passing Alex and sitting down on the couch behind him.

"I guess I would have to punish you," Miles said without so much as looking at Alex. How he reacts to that question will be Miles gauge of how upset Alex actually is. If he takes the bait then he is just looking for Miles' attention and just being a little brat to prove his point. If he doesn't then he's serious. When Alex comes and sits on the couch next to him he gets neither of the responses that he's been looking for.

"Miles, I'm not in the mood right now. I'm tired and just sorta... I dunno, I've been pretty down this week," He sighed.

"Your brain chemistry has been messed with," Miles told him. "It's not uncommon for people to feel a little burned out our depressed after taking ecstasy. It will pass."

"I don't think it's just that." Alex sighed. "I don't know. I guess I'm having trouble adjusting to how my life has been changing lately. Everything is better than it was before so I should be happy right?"

"Are you saying that you're unhappy with the way your life is going?" Miles asked.

"No... it's certainly much easier than it has been and it's nice to not have to worry about so many of the problems I've had in the past. It's just all a bit overwhelming."Alex said scooting a little closer to Miles. Miles opened up his arm, putting it on the back of the couch in case Alex wanted to come and cuddle up to his side.

"Do you want to tell me what's bothering you?" Miles asked. Alex paused for a moment before doing just as Miles thought he would. He finally came to him, leaning into his side with his legs stretched out the opposite direction on the couch. Alex thought about it for a moment before shaking his head.

"No, I don't think I want to talk about it. Trying to explain things to others is difficult for me and I don't really know how to describe it," Alex said, as he sank down deeper into Miles' hold.

"Well, then what DO you want to do?" Miles asked.

"I dunno, I'm just... you ever have those days where-" Alex stops to contemplate exactly how he wants to word this. "I feel a bit like bran flakes today. Just dull, boring, like you're existing but there's not really anything substantial I guess. Does that make any sense?"

 

"None what so ever," Miles laughed.

"I just feel sort of blank today I guess. Like, nothing interesting to see here. I could just lay here and stare at the ceiling all day and that would be fine with me." Alex said.

"That my love sounds like you're depressed, and probably a bit tired. I think that I have just the remedy for that," Miles said, reaching over to grab the TV clicker. He's about to change channels when Alex whines at him in protest.

"But I like the Kardashians...."

"Alex, you have GOT to be kidding me," but he still left the channel where it was.

About an hour into what Miles considers to be absolutely mind numbing programming Alex had already fallen asleep against him, his legs curled up beneath him in what looked like a rather uncomfortable position. When he started to snore Miles laughed, deciding to get up from the couch and picking Alex up in his arms. He was surprisingly light, which made him easy to carry. That would be good once they started to get more into more intense scenes. It had been a while since Miles could say it was easy to pick up one of his submissives. Jay was probably the only one that he could manage it with. Jeff has never and will never let Miles get away with trying it and Owen is the size of a small moose. Alex would be much easier to toss around if he would allow it. Miles is lost in these thoughts when Alex starts to stir in his arms, woken up by the movements. "Stoooop put me down." He complained, trying for a moment to struggle before settling right back down again.

Miles walked into Alex's room putting him down on the bed and sitting down next to him. "I think you need a nap. How last did Alexa have you up last night?" Miles asked.

"Ugh, we were up until she left this morning," Alex said. "I've only slept a couple of hours, but up until last night, I was thinking that I'd just sleep on the plane and last minute she told me she didn't think it was a good idea for me to go with her. I don't get it! Is she not satisfied with my work? Have I done something wrong and I'm being punished for it now?" Alex whined, pulling his blanket over himself.

"Were you excited about the trip?" Miles asked.

 

"I dunno...No, kinda, not really. But still, yes." Alex sighed. "I've never been to London before other than when we were flying to America and that was only in the airport terminal! I want to see it, but trading one big city for another makes me anxious," Alex shrugged as he wiggled around under the blanket before tossing his sweatpants he'd been wearing off to the side. If he's going to have a nap he might as well get comfortable.

"I'm sorry Alex, I might have had something to do with you not going," Miles admitted. "I would have stayed out of it if I knew she was thinking about taking you along."

"How would you have had anything to do with it? I thought that Alexa wasn't speaking to you either." Alex raised an eyebrow.

"She wasn't, but she does speak about you rather often with Nick..." Miles is looking for the best way to explain to Alex what he'd done the day previous. "Who I may have bribed into having lunch with me yesterday to get information."

"Nice try Miles, I know better than that. Nick can't be so easily bought," Alex rolled his eyes, looking up at Miles for a moment before putting his head in the older man's lap.

"You're right and believe me it was not easy to talk him into it," Miles sighed. "Took me a whole day last week to figure out what dorm he was in. Then I stood out there three days in a row to catch him when he was coming and going to try and convince him. By the third time, I think he figured out that I wasn't giving up so he finally caved." Miles admitted. It wouldn't hurt to let Alex know that he's put in quite a great deal of effort to be sitting there next to him at the moment.

"So what did you two talk about then?" Alex asked.

"You, that was really the only thing that we discussed. I was trying to find a way to talk to you so that I could apologize. Figured I'd have to get to you through one of your gate keepers and it wasn't going to be Alexa. Although, Nick told me he might just mention the little conversation that he and I had to Alexa," Miles smirked.

"You mean she left me here cause she knew you were going to come over? I guess that's not such a bad thing... and I do love camping," Alex said. To be honest a few days without Alexa might do him some good at the moment. Since becoming her assistant Alex had learned just how hectic the fashion world was and being right on the brink of the summer season had only made it more chaotic than usual.

Miles wasn't sure if he should mention that the camping trip was Nick's idea. It might be best to leave that out. It wasn't so much that he wanted credit for the idea, he just wasn't sure how Alex would feel about Nick telling Miles personal things about it. "That's good then," He nodded. "I haven't been in quite a long time, but I know the perfect spot," Miles said.

"Where are we going?"Alex asked.

"Up into the mountains upstate. It's only a few hours of driving, but it's like a whole different world!" Alex nodded he likes the sound of that.

"Good thing I really want to get out into the wilderness. I guess your apology is working this time, but you really did fuck up." Alex nodded grabbing Miles elbow and tugging on it, trying to pull him into bed with him.

"Does that mean I'm forgiven?" Miles asked.

"Dunno, I guess so," Alex said. "Miles a lot of the most important people in my life have walked away from or forgotten about me. What you did just makes me think you're going to be more of the same," Miles had been stupid not to realize what Alex was really upset about. He obviously thinks that Miles is going to abandon him like everyone else in his life had.

"That wasn't my intention. I'm sorry, really. I'd fallen asleep on the couch and when Jeff called me I just blanked out completely. Every time this happens it's terrifying because any overdose could be his last. He's not going to live much longer Alex, not at this rate."

"Where is he now?" Alex asked. He is a bit curious about what had happened with Owen.

"In a Detox clinic, I doubt he'll actually finish the program. Once he knows it's safe to leave then he'll run off again. That's why I haven't told him that I paid off his dealer. I want him to think he's still in danger so he'll stay put. Unfortunately, being in the clinic will do fuck all for him until he decides for himself that he wants to stop using. I keep hoping that something will really shake him and wake him up, but it might be time to give up on that notion." Miles sighed.

"You always seems sad when you talk about Owen," Alex commented.

"Because he makes me sad. It's like he's lost all sense of self-preservation by now. He just seems like he doesn't care if he lives or not anymore. Sometimes I question if he's actually trying to kill himself but he's too much of a coward to actually do it." Miles sighed. "He's waiting for an outside force to finish the job for him and putting people that I love in danger because of it."

"What do you mean?" Alex asked. He could see the anger rising in Miles' voice as he spoke.

"The whole reason we found Owen in the first place is that someone dropped him on Jay's doorstep. The dealer that Owen owed money lived in his neighborhood, they knew who he was, and if they got angry enough that could have been used against Owen. The idea of someone actually hurting Jay..." Miles shivered he doesn't want to even think about it. "Would have been all Owen's fault. So Jeff and I went and took care of them."

"Is that why your face looks so bad?" Alex asked.

"Gee, thanks, Alex." Miles rolled his eyes. "But yes."

"Noooo, you ruined it. This is the part where you give me a cocky smile and say 'Shoulda seen the other guy'" Alex said, grabbing Miles and pulling him closer though. "So how are Jay and Jeff? Did that work out?"

"No, the twat denied it. Jay flat out asked Jeff if he was in love with him and he said no! It's not my business to get in the middle. Jeff will speak up when he's ready to," Miles sighed.

"Well, if Jay is still so crazy about you maybe he's afraid that it will ruin their friendship," Alex suggested. "But fighting drug dealers to keep him safe has probably just given him a massive hard on for you all over again." Miles rolled his eyes at Alex.

"I didn't fight any drug dealers. Not intentionally anyway," Miles insisted. "I just paid them off and they roughed us up a bit... and as far as Jay I promised him I'll do better. I haven't been very good to him recently-" Miles saw the look on Alex's face start to fall when he says this. "Didn't start with you just so you know. It's been like this for months between us." He says as if he can tell exactly what Alex is thinking. "I promised him I would do better try to be there for him more," Alex wants to ask what that means for him but finds the question to be rather selfish so he keeps it to himself. There is one important thing he needs to ask though.

"Miles, do you actually like me?" He asked.

"What?" Miles isn't entirely sure where that question came from!

"Do you actually like me or are you just interested in me because I'm a virgin?" Alex asked.

"Alex..."

"I mean, I'm not stupid. I know that there are some men who find that desirable. Like it's some prize for you or something," Alex said. "It's just hard for me to figure out because you have someone like Jay, and you've got your friends, and an unending supply of cute models why do you want to drag me into it. Just feels a little out of place don't you think?"

"You think too much," Miles said, ruffling Alex's hair. "I spent three days standing out in front of a dorm because you wouldn't answer my calls. What does that tell you?"

"That you have creepy stalker tendencies?" Alex joked, he does get the point though. "Just say it, tell me you like me."

"Then tell me you forgive me," Miles smirked, two can play at that game.

 

"That's not fair! What if I haven't forgiven you yet!" Alex asked, sitting up on the bed and crossing his legs, facing Miles.

 

"But you have, haven't you? Why else would you want me here?" Miles asked leaning closer to Alex. Alex can't help but be drawn closer as well. "What if I haven't decided if I like you yet?" His tone is softer, quieter than usual.

"But you have, Haven't you?" Alex asked, echoing Miles' previous reply, closing his eyes as he speaks in anticipation of the way Miles kisses him cutting short the final syllables of his question. When they break apart they're both smiling.

"I like you," Miles whispers as he puts his hand on the back of Alex's head and pulls him closer to kiss his forehead.

 

"I forgive you."


	9. Mountain sound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hi everyone. Sorry that this took so long to get finished. Between working two jobs and that fact that for a moment I thought I was going to be sent out on the road for work I haven't had a whole lot of time. That and just being a bit depressed it was hard to motivate myself to finish the editing. I promise it won't be as long between updates. That being said I might start doing slightly shorter updates in order to get them finished quicker. That way I get less overwhelmed with the workload and you all don't have to wait as long.
> 
> Also, I HAVE A NEW FIC THAT I'VE STARTED. I'm very excited about it right now. It's a nice change of pace to explore new characters, dynamics, and a new AU. It's actually been very helpful with the writer's block that I've been having with everything else! So if you like BLUR and GORILLAZ please do me a favor and go check out CHARTS OF DARKNESS!!!
> 
> I really hope you all like this. Thanks for sticking it out with me while I've been lagging behind. Let me know what you think. Love you all <333

was supposed to be an afternoon nap quickly turned into Miles letting Alex sleep through the night. They would need to get up early to head out of the city anyways so he might as well let him get some rest. If he had been that tired then he must have needed it. Sometimes Miles forgets that Alex is a teenager. Although he's an adult in the eyes of society and the law he's still just a kid. He's growing both physically and mentally and if he needs the sleep then who is Miles to stop him from getting it. Although he'd love to wake him up and go for a walk in the park or something of the sort, he resisted knowing they would have plenty of time to spend together in the coming days. Eventually, he decided to join him in bed.

By the time morning came Alex had forgotten that Miles was there with him. He rolled over, not expecting to be faced with the now shaved headed man. The new look shocked him a bit as he'd only seen it at the rave before. He would have been less startled with a face covered in hair on the pillow next to him, but like this Miles' features were fully revealed. Somehow it made him look more masculine and older in the most positive way. Alex had to admit, he found the new look intensely attractive, drawing him in like a moth to the flame as he reached out a hand subconsciously to run it across Miles newly smooth scalp, but he stopped at the last second. This is the only time he's been awake before Miles and had a chance to examine his features without feeling awkward about it. He decided to take advantage of the opportunity a little longer.

Miles doesn't wake up until his alarm beeps on his phone. It startled Alex, making him look away quickly. He attempted to look like he was still asleep which might have been more convincing had he not been leaning up on his elbows already. That and he had nearly jumped out of his skin due to the sudden noise. Miles reached over to grab his phone from beside the bed, hitting the option to snooze rather than turn it off. He rolled over, putting an arm around Alex and slipping a leg between the smaller boy's thigh. He sighs, pressing his face against Alex's shoulder making a humming sound. Alex can't help but blush, he makes a slightly distressed noise and heard Miles stifle a laugh.

"How long have you been awake?" Miles asked without moving from his position pressed against Alex's body.

"Not long..." Alex admits. He knows by now that when Miles asks a question he expects it to be answered. He won't ask it a second time.

"And what were you doing?" Miles asked although knows already.

"Just looking...at you," Alex said, this would be a great time to either roll away or get up, but Miles has got him trapped so he can't escape the situation.

"Nothing wrong with that Alex. I do it quite often when you're sleeping," Miles said

"Why? I'm really nothing special to look at," Alex shrugged, sitting up and looking down at his toes as he wiggled them underneath the thin sheets.

"Stop that, I won't tolerate you putting yourself down," Miles said, putting a hand on Alex's shoulder. "We ought to get up and get on the road. It would be nice to get to the campsite by noontime."

"Does it really take that long to get to the mountains?" Alex asked as he attempted to climb over Miles to get out of bed. Miles took the opportunity to grab Alex by his sides and pull him down on top of him.

"Not usually, but I thought we could talk the scenic route. It's a nice drive." He said smiling at Alex who had once again gone red as Miles' kissed his neck.

" I haven't packed yet," Alex said as he tried to pull away from Miles' grip.

"I did it for you, last night. You can check your backpack if you want," Miles said, releasing Alex and pointing to a new dark violet camping backpack with black trim and straps. Miles smirked at the pleased look on Alex's face. "You like it?"

"I always wanted one like this," Alex nodded, crawling over on the floor to check the contents of the bag. "Makes me feel like I could be a real explorer."

"I thought you might approve of the color," Miles laughed as he watched Alex look wide-eyed at the outside of the bag like Christmas had come early before opening it to check the contents. "I wasn't sure if you had hiking boot either, so I picked up a pair. Should be the right size," Miles had needed to ask Nick for help on that one. "The laces match your backpack."

"You're kidding!" Alex is trying unsuccessfully to not look as excited as he is. He still doesn't like the idea of Miles buying him things, but it feels nice to have something nice and new of his own. Nick's parents had always helped him where they could. They'd kept him fed and with a roof over his head, they'd done more for him then he could ever repay them for. Alex had always done his best to retain some independence though. He'd made his own money waiting tables and doing odd jobs since he was younger and had tried his best to take care of his own needs. He'd never been able to afford much and because of it the majority of his things were second hand or he simply went without where he could manage to skimp. These things were no big deal to Miles. Something he could pick up on a whim yet they seemed so incredible to Alex. "Thank you, Miles! Really, I mean it."

"It's no problem. I'm glad you like it." Miles smiled, rolling over and lighting a cigarette as he sat up on the edge of the bed.

"Really, I love it," Alex said looking at his backpack. In the bottom, there was a new sleeping bag in a deep blue color and a purple water bottle for the trip. Everything else seemed to be his own. Heavy socks, a couple pairs of jeans, long sleeve shirts, jumpers, a jacket and well, not a whole lot else. "Not a whole lot of clothes in here," Alex pointed out. Most of what was in there seemed to be for if it got cooler outside.

"Once we get to the campsite there's really no reason to have much on." Miles winked at Alex. Alex had already walked over to his closet and was pulling out a t-shirt and some shorts to add to the contents of the bag.

"Is this all just a ploy to get me naked and have your way with me?" he asked.

"Not entirely no," Miles defended.

"Butter me up, take me away somewhere, I hope you're not thinking that just because you're doing something nice for me that I'm going to have sex with you," Alex sighed.

"I don't think that at all. I don't expect anything in return Alex. We can just go camping as friends and you can keep your clothes on the entire trip if you want," Miles shrugged.

" No... no, I don't want that!" Alex said "And, I never got a chance to thank you for that night at the rave... I said some things that I didn't mean and I'm just glad you didn't take me seriously."

"Alex, when you're under the influence that way you're in no place to give consent. I would never take advantage of you like that," Miles told him. "There's no need to thank me."

Alex sighs, thinking back to last night. Miles had asked him if he wanted to talk about what was bothering him and he'd turned him down. Part of him wants to tell Miles now because his previous comment is just another one of the things that, although it is in no way negative, have him concerned. He chooses instead to bite his tongue knowing that it will all be said in time. Now isn't the moment for such a serious dialogue. He simply shoves a few other articles of clothing into his bag and runs back over to the bed, launching himself at Miles who's back hits the bed with a thud leaving Alex, now straddling his hips as he smiles down at him.

"Thank you." He says, leaning in to kiss Miles not once, not twice but three times quickly on the lips before letting it linger. "For everything,"

A little more than an hour later they're in Miles sleek black Aston Martin heading out of the city with the camping necessities stuffed into the back. Alex already seems thrilled and is chattering away. "This car makes you look like a Bond Villian," He comments

"The idea was to be Bond himself. It is a Bond car after all." Miles smirked glad that Alex had picked up on the fact that there was some similarity.

"No way, are you serious?" Alex asked.

"Aston Martin DBS, just like in the movies. Though I liked the more classic look of the DB5 this seemed a bit sportier and more fitting for a place like the city." Miles told him. "Wait until we get out of this perpetual traffic jam and we can open her up a bit."

"Can I drive?" Alex asked.

 

"You think you could handle a car like this?" Miles asked raising an eyebrow and glancing over at Alex

"Totally! Nick and I used to steal his parent's car and go street racing with the older boys. I was REALLY good especially at drifting." Alex said casually as he sat in the passenger seat playing with his phone. "How do you think I got the money to move to America?"

"Are... are you being serious with me right now?" Miles asked. He hadn't expected an answer like that.

"No! Of course not! Nick's mum drove a minivan. I can drive though," Alex insisted.

"Have you ever driven a manual?" Miles asked, not that he's going to let Alex drive, especially up mountain roads

"No," Alex said a smirk curling across his lips as they stopped at a traffic light. He leaned in closer, lightly running his fingertips in a small pattern across the top of Miles hand which rested on the gear shift. "But I can appreciate a man who knows how to work a stick." He bit his lip staring directly at Miles. Alex is certainly ready to play games especially after almost two weeks with any sort of release. He's hoping that he would be able to get another lesson or two out of this trip.

"Well," Miles' voice is much too calm for Alex to be satisfied with it. "Maybe I'll teach you how to drive one some time. You can start with parking lots and maybe one day I'll let you get out on the road." Alex suddenly no longer cares that his plan is being thrown off course.

"Really?" He asks excitedly. "YES!"

"Thought you might like that," Miles joked.

For the rest of the trip, Alex was doing his best to get Miles attention. Miles is quickly realizing that trapping an energetic teenage boy in the car for several hours was not a good idea. He'd repeatedly tried to slip his hands into Miles' lap to get a rise out of him. He'd then taken to singing along to bad pop songs much too loudly with his headphones in until Miles had snatched them away which left him pouting. Alex had then resorted to playing his music out of his phone speaker instead.

"We're really going to have to work on expanding your musical horizons," Miles commented as yet another spice girls song came on.

"I listen to plenty of good music, this is just my get amped mix," Alex said swaying in his seat with the music in a way that stretched his torso, causing his shirt to ride up showing off just how tight the teal bike shorts he was wearing really were. Miles has to admit for trying to dance in his seat the younger boy is managing to do a pretty good job of being provocative, running his hands over his body.

"You don't need to get amped you need to calm yourself down. How about something a little more low-key?" Miles asked.

"I like this song," Alex shrugged as he rolled down his window. He slid down in his seat sticking his bare feet out into the cool air. His boots were next to him on the floor. He hadn't bothered to put on the heavy boots other than to try them on before they left. He'd been quite a sight walking around the apartment in nothing but his new boots and the lovely Lavender underwear that had earned him his nickname.

"Alex, stop that, sit up like a normal human being... and put your seatbelt back on," Miles rolled his eyes trying not to look over at Alex. The way his body is stretched out on the passenger side of the car at the moment might just be too good to resist.

"Jeeze, what are you? my mom?" Alex asked, looking at his phone. He knows he's close to cracking Miles and that's exactly what he's been trying to do the whole drive. He might think he's being slick but Miles is used to this type of behavior.

"See this is what I meant last night when I said you were a brat. I wouldn't let you put your hand down my pants because I'm concentrating on getting us upstate safely and now you're behaving like a child. You're lucky that you're not a more experienced submissive." Miles huffed.

"What would you do to me if I was?" Alex asked. He's not about to do as Miles is telling him to. He wants to see just how far he can push his luck first.

"I'd tie you up and throw you in the back seat for the rest of the ride," Miles grumbled.

"I'd fight you on it," Alex rolled his eyes.

"I'm not above the idea of putting you in the boot," Miles shrugged. He wouldn't actually do it of course. That would be far too cruel and not to mention dangerous.

"I'd just scream until someone noticed at a stop light and you would have a lot of explaining to do about the young boy in provocative clothing tied up in your car," Alex smirked. "You know, if I REALLY wanted to get you into trouble I could pass for sixteen. I bet they would believe me if I said that you kidnapped poor little me on my way home from school." Alex tried his best to make his face look angelically innocent. Miles was neither fooled nor impressed.

"You're walking on thin ice Alexander, now sit properly and put that window up," Miles scolded. "This is your last warning, you've got until the count of three. One... two...."

"Make me," Alex said over-enunciating his words. "Daddy," he adds with a teasing flick of his tongue as he hits the D sounds harder than is necessary. Miles doesn't even bother to say three. They're on the back roads and there is no one around them so he pulls off to the side of the road bringing the car to an abrupt halt. It happens so quickly that Alex (who really ought to have been wearing that seat belt) rolled forward out of the seat smacking his ankle against the side of the window as he did.

Miles got out of the driver's side of the car and crossed to the passenger door opening it and offering Alex a hand. Miles still intended to punish him, but he had knocked the small boy a little harder than he'd intended to and he'd seen the way his foot had connected with the frame. "Are you alright? Let me see your ankle," Miles said. Alex nodded sliding to the edge of the seat and sticking his foot out as Miles knelt down to inspect it.

"I'm fine. You didn't stop THAT fast. It probably sounded worse than it actually felt. Really I'm alright." Alex assured him although he knows that Miles will likely not be satisfied until his own eyes confirm Alex's words which they do a short time later. Miles kissed the side of Alex's ankle before letting it go. He stood up and walked around to the back of the car, opening the hatch, and rummaging around through it until he found what he was looking for. He returned a moment later with a pair of purple leather cuffs and a link to go between them.

"Stand," He commanded.

"What? Cuffs! No!" Alex complained.

"Alex, I won't tell you again. Stand up, NOW!" Miles started to raise his voice just enough to be threatening. Alex did as he was told without question this time, standing up in front of Miles and averting his eyes downward. "Turn around and put your hands behind your back." Again, without conflict, Alex complied. Miles started with the left wrist looping the cuff around it and pulling the strap tight. He checked to see that it was fitted properly. Miles must have picked them up specifically for him as they were smaller than the pair of cuffs that Alex recalled having on the last time Miles had used restraints on him. "You won't be able to pull your way out of these." He laughed as he linked the two together behind Alex's back before pressing him back towards the car's interior.

Alex grumbled as he got back into the car, his once devilish smirk now flipped into an annoyed pout as Miles stood next to the car looking down on him. "You best behave yourself or I'll slap more than just that pretty bum of yours," Miles warned. He took a cigarette from his back pocket and sparking it up as he leaned on the frame of the car. He'd love nothing more than to slap the smug look off Alex's face as he baits him, but that's not something that they've talked about yet.

"Dare you to try," Alex grumbled. Miles gives Alex a stern look before he speaks again.

"No, not today," He glared he will not reward Alex's behavior with the attention he's so desperately seeking. "If you want any chance of getting what you would like later, then I suggest that you do as I say. I don't want to hear another sound out of you until this car starts moving again." Miles said, turning his back to Alex and leaning against the car as he smoked his cigarette. He took each drag slowly, drawing out the process. Once he's extinguished the flames he takes a moment to stretch, check that he hasn't received any phone calls while they've been on the road, and took a moment to admire the peaceful scenery.

To Alex, it feels like it's been an eternity but the time that Miles gets back into the care and turns the engine back on. "You may speak now," He says, finally acknowledging Alex's existence again

"How long do I have to keep the cuffs on?" Alex asked, his voice low and unsure.

"Until we stop again," Miles doesn't plan to keep Alex in them for more than an hour. It could get to be quite uncomfortable with his arms trapped behind him in the car. However, he's not going to tell Alex when he intends to free him. "Hopefully this will teach you not to try my patience with you, Alex."

"I was just playing!" Alex whined. "This isn't fair!"

"What did you think would come of you pressing my buttons?" Miles asked.

"I dunno, maybe getting my throat fucked or something not RESTRAINTS?" He didn't try to struggle. There was no use in it and it would do little to help his cause.

"Alex, I'm not a stupid man. You've been trying to provoke me into touching you all morning. Obviously giving you any type of sexual attention even if it's just forcing you to get me off will be giving you in to you and encouraging this behavior in the future. Remember that the best way to get what you want is to listen and behave. Is that clear?"

"... I understand sir. I've learned my lesson," Alex said, looking down at his bare feet on the floor. "Will you take the cuff's off, please? They're digging into my back." Alex knows that if he was ever in any actual discomfort all it would take for Miles to release him is one word, but this hardly would warrant such drastic measures. He needs to suck it up and deal with the punishment that Miles has deemed fit for his behavior.

"Not a chance," Miles laughed.

It's about another forty minutes before Miles does decide to pull over again. Alex has calmed down now. For about the first fifteen minutes or so there had been silence in the car before they started talking again. Miles pulled into a nearly empty gas station just of the road. "If I release these are you going to behave yourself the rest of the ride Alex?" He asked.

"Yes sir, I'll behave myself." Alex nodded with a shy smile.

"Good boy," Miles said reaching behind Alex's back to undo the link that went between the two cuffs. This allowed Alex to get his hands out from behind himself. "Hands out," Miles instructed. Alex immediately showed Miles both his hands allowing the older man to remove the cuffs. He took Alex's wrists in his hands, running his thumbs over the indention left in his skin from the leather straps. He examined the lines breifly to make sure that they hadn't chaffed before leaning closer to kiss Alex's forehead. "Put ya shoes on and go get us some snacks alright?"

"Ok," Alex nodded smiling a bit as Miles released his arms and handed him some cash to pay with. He quickly pulled on his boots, leaving the laces untied and simply tucking them into the sides.

 

"Not to much sugar Alex," Miles called after him as Alex walked towards the store across the lot.

"Whaaaat? I can't hear you!" Alex called back across the parking lot making them both laugh. Miles doesn't take it as defiance this time. It's simply Alex being and Alex and that's something that he enjoys.

 

Alex is something special, Miles thinks about it while he's standing at the pump fueling up the car. There's something about the younger man that has Miles actually pursuing him. He had enough options that usually putting in any effort was unnecessary or not worth the benefits. The only relationships that he put any time into with were the ones with his inner circle. Even sometimes he let those slide, hence Jay's recent aggravation with him.

It's not like Alex was the first submissive that Miles had since Eugene. There had been a whole handful. Each one of them had failed to capture his attention for longer than a couple of sessions. Usually, he didn't even bother to establish solid rules with them. He would go for the opt-in method with them, deciding what was allowed to go on in a certain session rather than the things that weren't allowed to ever happen. He had very little concern for what their hard limits were because they would never attempt anything that wasn't discussed for that day. Sure, he used the same method with Alex, but to compensate for Alex's lack of experience rather than his own lack of interest.

Any of these other submissive that had come and gone he wouldn't spend any time outside of sessions with. Alex had him captivated in a way that they didn't to the point where when the boy had shut him out he'd actually felt panicked by the idea of losing him. Now here he was halfway up to the mountains with a boy who made him doubt his own willpower. Alex, however, could never know about that so he pulled himself from his thoughts as he saw Alex walked out of the shop with a bag in his hand.

"Feels so nice to stretch my legs," Alex said putting the bag on the hood of the car and stretching his arms over his head, shaking his stiff body out a bit. He doesn't want to get back into the car until he has to. "Especially after you had me stuck with my arms behind my back."

"If you don't want that to happen again then you better be on your best behavior," Miles joked looking over at Alex as he leaned against the hood of the car. Though Alex isn't very tall his body looks long and enticing as he leans back against the shimmering silver surface. Miles couldn't look away as he reached into the snack bag and pulls out a glass coke bottle, popping the cap off with a quick twist of his slender fingers. There's something erotic in the way his lips place themselves over the head of the bottle. It's as if Miles can see everything in slow motion. The way the drops of condensation run down the sides of the glass, the way Alex has his eyes shut and the slight bobbing of his neck as he swallows a long gulp... and then he manages to dribble some of it down the front of his shirt and just like that the illusion is broken causing Miles to laugh.

"Whaaaat? Why are you laughing at me?" Miles Alex complained looking over at Miles and wiping his face with the back of his hand.

 

"I think it's funny how one second you can look so magically erotic and then quickly remind me how awkward you are," Miles said shaking his head and closing the gas cap. "Let's get going, we won't be on the road for too much longer." He promised.

True to his word it's at most another hour before they're trading paved roads for dirt ones and eventually pull off into a small clearing. Concealed on all sides by thick patches of brush and trees. "Wow, how did you know about this place?" Alex asked as the car came to a halt. He's eager to get out of the car and have a look around.

"The property belongs to a friend of mine that I met while working on a shoot years ago. He and his son are beekeepers. They have a massive property outside of Buffalo where they have their hives. They bought this as a second property and had plans to clear some of the land in order to build another farm, but decided to keep it as a hideaway for themselves." Miles explained.

"Bees? I'm frightened of bees. I've never actually been stung by one before, but I saw Nick get stung when we were kids. He's allergic and had an awful reaction. I was worried the same might happen to me," Alex confessed. "Don't they get stung? Did you go near the hives?"

"I'll admit I'm not fondest of bees either, but they use protective clothing in order to harvest their honey and then, they take the raw honey and distill it into the most delicious honey wine you'll ever taste," Miles is practically licking his lips at the thought of the sweet drink.

"I didn't even know that you could make wine from things like honey..." Alex said although he'd never given much thought to the process of making wine in the first place.

" I think I have a bottle at home somewhere still. Maybe, just maybe I'll share it with you. If I do still have it then it needs to be saved for a very special occasion." Miles winked at Alex as he turned the car off at the edge of the clearing. The only thing that is occupying the space is what appears to be a fire pit.

They take a moment to unpack things from the car but while Miles is keen on the idea of getting the tent up so that they will have some shelter when nightfall comes Alex is much more concerned with having a look around and running off some of the energy that had built up over a few too many hours in the car. Miles made a mental note that he should probably take the main roads on the way home to save them both the time and aggravation.

Miles has pulled out the green and gray canvas tent, along with its rods and stakes before he realizes that he has no idea where Alex has gone to. "Alex.... Alex?" He calls to him looking around the open campsite. He's not near the car or the fire pit, he's not visible in any of the thinned rows of trees around them and Miles is almost concerned for a moment that perhaps the boy had wandered off somewhere on his own.

There are not many things that frighten Miles Kane but at the moment nothing terrifies him more than the prospect of losing Alex in the woods. What if he got hurt? Or ran into some wild animal! It occurs to Miles that he has no idea what sorts of animals live in the woods that surround them at the moment. What if there were bears? Or mountain lions? Were their poisonous snakes? The unnecessary buzzing of anxiety in the back of his mind roars louder and louder till it's flipped off like a switch with the sound of a sweet and familiar voice.

"Up here," Alex giggles. Miles looks up and realizes that the whole time Alex has been out of sight because he was high in the branches of the tree above where he'd been working. The little brat had probably been watching him as the fear had settled in which meant that Miles had to play off any concerns he might have noticed now in order to save face.

"Alex... What are you doing up there?" Miles asked, giving him a half-amused smile.

"I like to climb trees!" Alex insisted. Truthfully he'd been hoping if he could 'disappear' for a moment that he would be able to escape from having to help Miles with the tent.

"Get down here and come help me with this, I need another set of hands," Miles said looking back down at the tent.

"I don't want to!" Alex complained. "Can't we just sleep under the stars? We don't need a tent!"

"You won't feel the same once it gets cold later," Miles told him.

"It's almost summer! How cold can it possibly get?" Alex asked.

"You'd be surprised," Miles shrugged. " But if you want to sleep on the cold wet ground and freeze be my guest. I'll be in the nice warm tent." Alex seems to consider it for a moment before he speaks again.

"I can't get down I'm stuck," He lies. Maybe he can just happen to find a suitable way down once the tent is up. Miles, however, is becoming wise to Alex's tricks.

"You figured out how to get up there. You can get down just fine you're just hoping that I'll do all the work for you," Miles said, sitting down on the ground next to the tent and looking up at Alex for a moment before pulling out his phone to use as a 'distraction' in order to ignore Alex entirely. "When you're done behaving like a child then you can come down and help me, but the more time that you waste the less time we'll have to go swimming."

"... swimming?" Alex asked, Mildly intrigued and now and considering starting his descent.

"Yes, I was thinking we could hike out to the river to go swimming but it if gets too late we won't be able to. It will have to wait till tomorrow and I-" Miles sighed playing up his disappointment. "I had a lesson planned for you tomorrow" Just as he thought this has Alex scrambling to get out of the tree. He swings down off the last branch, landing on his feet with surprising ease from such a height. Miles smiles up at him from his place on the ground as Alex is now standing above him.

"Alright, you win I'll help," Alex said, but there's a look on his face that tells Miles he is bothered by something. He doesn't even have to ask before Alex tells him what it is. "You said no phones. I would have all of your attention." Miles smiled, getting to his feet.

"That's right I did, didn't I?" He said, holding out his hand. "That means you have to hand yours over too."

"Mines in the car, where do you think that I would stick it in these shorts." Alex laughed.

 

"So impractical without pockets, but I do so love them on you. So tight," Miles winked.

"I know, why do you think I keep wearing them around you." Alex laughed, his cheeks turning slightly pink as he did. Miles smirked walking past Alex to the car. He took both of their phones and locked them into the glove compartment. He then removed the key from his keyring handing it to Alex.

"Here, you hold onto it. We'll only open it up if there's an emergency with one exception," Miles paused.

"No! No exceptions!" Alex insisted looking a little hurt.

 

"Darling it's not an exception for me it's for you. When you wake up in the morning you're to get your phone an call Nick before we get started with what I have planned for the day in order to let him know you're safe," Miles said. "I don't want you to feel like I'm isolating you up here all alone."

"Oh, I can deal with that," Alex said. He's been worried that Miles exception would have something to do with work... or worse yet Jay.

"Good, now 'get this tent pitched," Miles said causing Alex to laugh and choke back the urge to make an awful innuendo.

Once Alex has managed to focus the tent went up relatively quickly, mostly because Alex is dying to go swimming. He took off down the trail that led to the river as soon as Miles pointed out which of the three trail mouths that ended at the campsite it was.

"Alex! Al," Miles called after him. He was so far behind that he was starting to lose sight of Alex in the trees. It's not that Miles was an out of shape man by any stretch of the imagination. It was just that Alex was fast, much faster than he could even attempt to keep up with. "ALEX WAIT UP!" He yelled to him again.

"Keep up old man!" Alex laughed, calling back to him. He loves when he has the chance to get up to a full speed run. In the city, he doesn't really have the opportunity due to traffic as well as having to weave in and out of people since he tended to run in more densely populated areas because they were the only ones that he was familiar with still. He really should start taking Miles advice to get out and explore more but he's too anxious to do it on his own.

"Call me.... Call me... an... old... man... one more time... Alexander.... I swear!" Miles huffed out his threat, trying to catch his breath when he finally caught up with Alex at the riverbed.

"What, I thought half the reason you brought me out here was to let me use up some of my energy. Just because I want to run doesn't mean that you have to keep up with me." Alex winked. He's breathing heavily but seems to be in much better condition than Miles who's lungs are burning to the point where he just wants to lay on the ground and die for a minute.

"I'm going to have to figure out something to do with all of that extra energy you've got," Miles grumbled.

"Good luck," Alex scoffed.

"I can think of a few things that could do the job," Miles said mostly to himself. He stood up straight from where he'd been bent over with his hands on his knees he walked over to Alex who was giving him the smuggest look he could muster. It was time to wipe that smirk off his face. He grabbed Alex by the face pinching his jaw in his hands and forcing Alex to meet his eyes. "Run off on me one more time and I'll keep you on a leash the rest of the trip." He said, letting go of Alex rather roughly causing the boy to rub his jaw. "You've been nothing but insubordinate the entire time since we left this morning. I'm starting to think that bringing you up here was a mistake. You've been such a sweet boy and I don't understand why you would start acting this way now. I don't want to be forced to take more drastic measures with your punishment. Now you see that rock over there? You're going to go and sit on top of it and wait until I tell you that you are permitted to move," Miles said, pulling his sweat-soaked shirt over his head.

"But Miles!" Alex complained. Miles didn't reply, he just pulled off the rest of his clothes as well as his shoes and folded them neatly, putting them in the grass on the river bank. "Miles! I wanna go swimming. It's hot!"

"Yes, it is very hot. I guess you shouldn't have run all that way, and

if you want to cool off I suggest you stop your complaining this second and go do as you were told. You're in time out." Miles said slipping into the water with a relieved sigh.

"Time out? What am I five?" Alex muttered as he moped his way over to the rock Miles had pointed out to him and sat on the edge of it as close as he could get to the water at least it seemed a little cooler there than in the direct sunlight. Miles had picked a shaded place intentionally. Just because he's in trouble doesn't mean that he wants Alex to overheat.

"Quiet Alex," Miles said, dunking his full body under the water. It was wonderfully cold and felt lovely against his warm skin. He waded out to the center of the river where the water was deeper, floating on his back. "Ooh that's nice," He sighed. Alex made a whining sound which caused Miles to look up. "What was that?"

"N-nothing I didn't say anything," Alex sighed pulling his knees up to his chest and staring at his reflection in the water, trying to look as dejected as possible.

Miles tried to stick to his guns for as long as he could, but that lasted all of five minutes. He swam over to Alex and jumped up on the rock next to him, looping an arm around the smaller boy who finally looked up from where his head had been resting on his arms with a glum look in his eyes. "Is something the matter Alex? You've been very hot and cold today. Are you still upset with me? You know if you're not ok with any of them at any point one word and it stops love. You have that power," Miles reminded him.

"No, no I like the power play that's fine..." Alex mutters drawing circles in the dry spots on the rock with the water that dripped from Miles. "I dunno, really it's nothing. I Guess I'm just not always as agreeable as you first made me out to be..."

"I can tell by the look on your face there is more to it than that Alex. You know you can tell me what's bothering you?" Miles assured him with a kiss on the cheek and he pulled the smaller boy a bit closer.

"I just don't know if I want to," Alex shrugged. So there was something up. Miles has every intention of finding out what it is, but the best way to do that is to let Alex come to him with the problem. If he forces it out of him that will only make Alex resent him.

"Then what do you want darling?" Miles asked.

"I want to go swimming!" Alex whined. "And some god damn attention!"

"I think that would be alright. You've done your time," Miles said, leaning over to kiss Alex. "Go ahead and strip down and come on in, the water is great." He added, sliding down off the rock and into the cool water below. Alex unlaced his boots, tossing them up on the shore, socks followed. He got to his feet, careful not to fall on the now slippery surface of the rock which had been slicked down thanks to Miles' wet body sitting next to him. Slowly, almost teasingly he pulled his now slightly damp shirt over his head, tossing it aside as well. Miles couldn't take his eyes of Alex, watching him disrobe. He had to admit, his lack of experience aside Alex could be incredibly provocative when he chose to be. It was like there was a button in his head that when pressed would flip off his gawkiness and replace it with an almost feline vixen sort of appeal. It had Miles wonder how he would look in sleek all-black Latex from head to toe. Perhaps, he could even get his hands on some latex body paint. He could use 'art' as an excuse to spend all day using Alex as his canvas before slowly peeling every last bit off of the boy's smooth skin once he'd gotten a few pictures. Those pictures would never see the light of day other than in his personal collection but-

"Hello, Miiiiilllleeees?" Alex laughed, splashing the older man my kicking water in his general direction. "I'm trying to be sexy for you, the least you could do is pay attention!" He teased, sticking his tongue out as he slid his hand over the front of those bike shorts that Miles is beginning to have a love/hate relationship with.

"I'm watching you love, just got a little caught up in a fantasy for a moment," Miles confessed.

"I hope it was about me!" Alex replied.

"Oh, it was. You're doing a very good job," The praise made Alex beam with pride that's what he's been wanting to hear all day! He tried to keep his pace slow as he pulled his shorts off, swaying his hips as he caught the seams of the stretchy fabric between his fingers. Truth be told he was dying to get them off because not only did he want to get in the river, but watching Miles swimming around naked without him has been doing things to his body that he had no control over! Once they're finally down around his ankles he stepped out of them, discarding the shorts into the pile with his shirt and shoes before making his way into the water, moving slowly for added effect. He swished his hips as he waded further and further into the river, trying not it show on his face just how cold he found it. He made his way over to Miles, wrapping his arms around his neck.

"Good enough for a kiss?" He asked with a slight pout on his lips that he couldn't seem to maintain as the corners kept sliding further and further up into a smile. Miles couldn't say no after such a beautifully calculated performance and instantly leaned in. Within seconds his tongue was pushing apart Alex's lips and his hands had found their way to his bum which Alex seemed to be excited about. He jumped up, wrapping his legs around Miles' torso. He was delighted to find that Miles was just as aroused as he was. Maybe, hopefully, he would finally get what he'd been craving. "Want you," He muttered against Miles' ear.

"I'll give you a choice, quick now and have less time to swim or swim first and wait a little while?" Miles asked. They didn't have a copious time left before they would have to begin their trek back to the campsite. The last thing that Miles wanted was for either of them to be out in damp clothing when it started to get dark. He wanted to have a fire already going by sundown.

Alex bit his lip as he contemplated his answer. "I've been waiting so long..." He muttered. "I haven't gotten off since before the rave."

"So you haven't touched yourself throughout the entire time that we haven't been speaking?" Miles was a bit surprised by that. He assumed that since Alex had gone rouge he would have simply done what he pleased.

"No, not at all. Since I wasn't talking to you I couldn't ask for permission, but I still didn't want to break my rules! If I did then I was worried you might not still want me as a submissive," Alex said looking away as his cheeks flushed red but still never letting go of Miles.

"Oh, you have been a very good boy Alex. How honest of you," Miles said kissing his neck. "I think that you've earned yourself a nice reward for that, but how about we swim for a little bit first?" Alex nods before smirking and pulling himself away from Miles using the force to splash him.

 

"CATCH ME IF YOU CAN!" He calls swimming off further downstream

 

After an hour or so of splashing around and having a wonderful time, both Miles and Alex were ready to relax and get out of the cold water. They'd found themselves a nice sunny patch of grass on the river, bank near the mouth of the trail that would lead them back to camp, where they could sun themselves and dry off for a bit. The heat was a nice contrast to their slick wet skin and the grass was soft beneath Alex's back as he watched Miles grab something from his pile of clothing.

"Are you ready for your reward Alex?" Miles asked as he walked back over to the boy with a bandana in his hand. He'd been wearing it around his wrist earlier in the day and was glad he'd decided to take it off to get into the water.

"Yes, please!" Alex said as Miles sat down in the grass next to him.

"Alright, then here's what we're going to do. I'm going to use this to blindfold you. Having your sight cut off is going to amplify all the sensations you're going to be feeling and you won't know where I'm going to touch or when. Are you alright with that?"

 

"Yes, sir." Alex nodded.

"Good. I know since it's been such a long time since you've been able to relieve yourself that you probably won't last for very long but I expect you to try and hold out for as long as you can. Understood?"

"Yes, sir" Alex repeated.

"Sit up," Miles instructed. Alex without thinking obliged, letting Miles loop the bandana over his eyes, tying it behind his head. "You can't see anything can you Alex?"

"No, sir," Alex said as Miles' gentle hands pressed him back to his previous position laying in the grass.

"Good, very good," Miles smirked deciding where exactly he wanted to start and with what. He didn't have any of his tools that he usually would use for this sort of introduction to sensory deprivation so he would have to improvise and seeing as they were in nature that wouldn't be all that hard to do. He decided to start off slow, picking up a twig from a couple feet away on the ground starting to lightly trail it over Alex's chest, letting it scratch him just the littlest bit, enough to be pleasant but not wanting to break skin with such an object. Alex twitched as soon as it made contact having not expected it but settled soon after enjoying the odd new sensation and Miles dragged the twig from his shoulders down to the tip of his toes, letting it scratch over the balls of Alex's feet causing him to pull back slightly. "No, you have to stay still," he teased as he tossed the stick aside.

Next, he moved onto something that would seem a bit less foreign, his mouth. He started at Alex's lips, kissing his way down his neck to his collarbones and eventually to his chest taking one nipple between his teeth and giving it a light nibble cause Alex to moan. "Like that huh?"

"Yes, sir," Alex replied. Truth be told he has rather sensitive nipples, not that anyone has ever bothered to ask him before or he would have gladly offered up that information. Miles continues to make his way down, biting Alex's hips and thighs. When Alex lets out a particularly loud groan he realizes that he's found another sensitive spot. Although Alex had kept fairly quiet until that point he seemed to come undone a bit when Miles had run his tongue down through the crease between his tight and his neglected groin. When Miles mirrored the action on the opposite side it seemed that he was ready to beg. "Please, please, sir. Touch me." Alex whimpered. His chest rose and fell rapidly as though it was getting harder and harder to breathe.

"Not just yet darling," Miles teased as he reached back towards the river bank getting his hand into the water, trying to scoop up some in his palm before dripping droplets over Alex's throbbing cock finally giving him the first taste of any sensation there. Miles smirked as Alex's entire body responded, jerking him halfway up before he settled back into the grass. "Oooh, you like the way that feels don't you?"

" 's cold!" Alex whimpered,

"it is, but you're looking a bit flushed at the moment Alexander," Miles said as he repeated the action with another handful of water causing Alex to cry out. This time Miles allowed every last drop to slide from his fingertips, watching as drop by unexpected drop Alex's body began to shake. Once his hands were completely dry Miles reached closer, starting to drag his well-manicured nails up and down the shaft of Alex's hard length earning a drawn-out moan from deep in the back of the boy's throat. He slid his fingertips up and down the reddened skin slightly out of time with each other for a moment before hooking them around just the tip and rubbing his thumb a few times over the head which was already slick with precum from the mere anticipation of being touched.

"please sir, more? Please?" Alex begged.

"Since you've been so well behaved..." Miles said, pulling his hand away to spit into his palm. Saliva would have to do in place of lube for the moment. As far as Alex was concerned he wouldn't have cared it Miles was wearing a sandpaper glove as long as he was going to get to cum soon. When Miles finally wrapped his hand around his cock it was like every need Alex had been having was finally being fulfilled within seconds he was a whimpering mess with his fists balled into the grass tearing it from its roots.

"Please, Please, sir I'm gonna cum," Alex whined. Miles could tell by the shake in his voice that Alex was coming undone, but his inexperience had been enough of an excuse up until this point.

"Oh no, you most certainly aren't," Miles said pulling his hand away just before Alex could reach his breaking point. He waited until Alex's breath evened out again before once again starting with painfully slow strokes that cause Alex to flail beneath him. "You stop that or I'll stop again."

"No! Please, sir. Don't stop! I need it!" Alex begged. The way his voice rose an octave when he was truly desperate was music to Miles' ears that he wasn't sure he'd heard up until this point. He could listen to Alex beg for hours and maybe one day he would take the change to but they would need to start their hike back soon and Alex would need a bit of time to cool down before that. Still, Miles wasn't done playing not just yet.

"I'll decide what you need Alexander," he said pulling his hand away yet again which made Alex nearly scream with frustration. Miles just chuckled at the site before starting his motions once again.

"I can't, I really can't. Oh god, fuck. Please! Please, sir," Alex begged. He could barely breathe but Miles thinks he's capable of more. He slowed his strokes but didn't pull his hand away this time. He can tell Alex has had enough but wants him to admit it before he's going to let him orgasm. Alex seems to be ready to give in and when Miles finally hears what he's sure is a choked sob he knows he's found the line. "Please, sir. Please let me cum. I can't stop it. I don't wanna be a bad boy. I don't wanna be bad," His voice was absolutely trembling which made Miles' smile grow wider.

"You can go ahead and cum for me Alex," Miles said and before he could even speed up back to his normal rhythm Alex had spilled himself all over Miles' fist. Miles smirked, washing his hand off in the water and reaching up to take the blindfold off of Alex. "How did that feel?" He asked.

"I... that... fuck." Alex muttered trying to catch his breath. "That was intense."

"It was, but I knew that you could handle it. You've been asking me to give you more." Miles said, sitting in the grass so that he could pull Alex between his legs and hold him in his arms. Alex immediately leaned back against him, sighing with relief as Miles combed his fingers through his still damp hair.

"I loved that," he muttered after a few moments. "Really, that was wonderful." It seems like every time he tries something new with Miles he comes out of the experience saying that it's the best orgasm he's ever had it seems to only get more intense as they go. Even though he's been on the brink of tears this time around it had been well worth the payoff.

"I think I'm rather fond of listening to you beg. You're quite vocal and I really like that," Miles commented, kissing Alex on the cheek several times and making him giggle. Miles is still hard, but he'll have Alex take care of his needs later on. "Are you alright to walk back to camp?"

"Mhm, I'm fine!" Alex said, getting up and stretching. "Better than fine, and I promise not to run off on you this time, but you have to promise that you'll hold my hand," Alex bargained as he walked over to where he'd thrown his clothes earlier to put them back on.

"I think that can be arranged," Miles smirked doing the same.

Miles keeps hold of Alex's hand the entire way back to their campsite and true to his word Alex doesn't make the slightest attempt to run off again. They walk along talking about anything and everything. Miles tells Alex about the different sorts of plant life that they encountered along the trail. At one point they even came across a young doe. Miles had pulled Alex off the trail before they passed her, shushing him so that they wouldn't spook her and could observe her from afar while she grazed for a while. "Reminds me a bit of you. You look a bit like a little deer sometimes." Miles whispered to Alex causing him to hold back the laugh that threatened to escape him in order not to scare off the deer who eventually moved on of her own accord.

Arriving back at camp Miles had built them a fire which they were now sitting around making S'mores. "I'm the one that told you that you should be eating healthy and here I am giving you sugar," Miles laughed.

"Mmm, but you can't go camping without S'mores! Not properly anyway!" Alex said sticking his marshmallow a bit closer to the flame. He's situated himself in Miles' lap nearly an hour ago around the time the sun had gone down. Even though his legs were falling asleep Miles could find no reason to complain. He thought Alex looked absolutely adorable, his hands were covered just a bit by his black sweater giving him a somewhat innocent appearance in the too big item of clothing that was keeping him warm. He held out his long tree branch, his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth just a bit as he concentrated on getting the sugary treat to what he deemed an acceptable level of toasted without accidentally catching it on fire.

When he finally pulled it away from the flame he reached behind them for more Graham crackers. They had already run out of chocolate. Alex had eaten most of it. He mashed the marshmallow in between two halves of the crack and smiles at his handiwork. "If you keep eating those you're going to turn into one," Miles joked.

"At least I'll be nice and sweet," Alex giggled, taking a bite out of the sugary treat causing Marshmallow to get stuck to his lip and chin.

"You've got, uh-"

"Hm?" Alex looked over at Miles who wiped a strand of stretched fluff from his chin before leaning in to kiss the rest away causing Alex to smile against his lips. He ended up abandoning the rest in favor of wrapping his arms around Miles' neck to deepen the kiss. With the evening they've spent together Alex is starting to feel differently about his relationship with Miles. He was wondering if Mile was feeling the same. He seemed to be with how kind and affectionate he'd been ever since they'd left the river earlier. It's got Alex in a place that feels vulnerable in a way that he's unfamiliar with but at the same time more secure than he's felt with anyone in years.

 

When their lips do part Alex chews on his for a moment before he speaks. "I used to go camping with my dad when I was a kid," He muttered. "During the summer we would go almost every weekend. When I was young it was just dad and I but when I got older we started bringing Nick along too. Dad loved to bird watch birds. He knew how to do all sorts of bird calls and even had a couple of little whistles that he would use from time to time. One of the first memories that I have as a kid was when I was maybe three years old, sitting on his lap while he held up his binoculars so I could see through them and he would point out the different birds to me...When I got older started insisting I could hold them on my own and eventually he got me my own pair. There were red and plastic... and I used to take them everywhere with me even to school. The other kids laughed because they thought I was some sort of nerd, but I could identify every single type of bird in our area by the time I was eight!" Alex said.

"You were close with your father when you were younger?" Miles asked.

"With both of my parents really. That's why it was such a surprise for me when they reacted the way that they did. I always thought that they would love me no matter what, but I guess that I was wrong..." Alex muttered, looking down at the ground and leaning his head against Miles' shoulder causing Miles to hold him a little tighter against his chest. "After that, the woods became this sort of safe haven that reminded me of when things had still been good. When we were younger Nick and I had built this makeshift tree fort. We called it Neverland because we always wanted to be like the lost boys. When I got kicked out we weren't sure that we wanted to tell Nick's parents so for the first two weeks I slept there until they found out... I guess I sort of became the lost boy that I always pretended to be and ever since I've sort of been looking for my Peter Pan... Someone to be my captain and guide me..." He admitted.

Miles stays quiet. He's glad that Alex has started to open up to him, and thinks that he might know where this conversation is starting to go. It might be best to let him finished before he says anything further. Every time that Miles really puts the time in it seems that Alex's walls come down a little further. Part of Miles is waiting for the day that they finally crumble and he can see the boy beyond them. As he's thinking about it Alex speaks again.

"Part of me wishes that you could be my Peter Pan but I know you never will be. You won't love me and that's fine. I don't need you to. I'm not looking to be loved by you, but I just need to know you're not going to leave me like the other people I've trusted... I don't see where I fit into your life really and yet in the time I've known you you've changed everything about my life. I'm afraid to get lost in it all and then have you walk away because you decide that I'm not worth your time anymore."

"Is this what's been bothering you, Alex?" Miles asked, petting his long chestnut locks.

"Yeah... I didn't really know how to say it but... I'd only been here a little over a week when I first met you so my entire life in New York has been dictated by your choices. Having someone else calling the shots in an already unfamiliar place can be scary, especially when I'm starting to like you probably more than I should." Alex blushed. "I'm afraid of how easy it would be for you to break me and what happened the night after the rave was a taste of that so... I've been trying to press your buttons to make sure that you're not just going to get fed up and cast me off." And there it was, suddenly it all made sense.

"So you've been testing me to see if I'll stop wanting to spend time with you because of it?" Miles asked. Alex nodding a little, hiding his face in Miles shirt, he doesn't say anything at first but Miles is almost sure that he hears a faint sniffle from him.

"Please don't be angry with me," Alex muttered at length with a hiccup and another sniff.

"Of course I'm not angry with you," Miles said, rubbing his hands over the boy back, noticing the way that even through the sweater he can feel the notches in his spine with the way Alex is bent and curled into himself on his lap. "I understand that you're afraid. It's normal to feel that way with things change, but next time you're worried just talk to me. There's no need to worry because I will NEVER be upset with you for telling me the truth. I'm not a mind reader, so I can't ease your anxiety unless you trust me enough to open up about what you're thinking."

"I know... It's just hard. I-I'm not used to being upfront with people. I'm always worried about being judged for the way I overthink so many things." Alex sighed, trying to compose himself as Miles reached to tilt his face up.

"Alexander, look at me," Miles instructed, and there's no way Alex can say no. He brushed the long curly strands away from Alex's forehead in order to make sure he was meeting his eyes dead on so as to show just how important what he was about to say was. "I can't tell you that I'll be your Peter Pan. I'm sorry, and I won't fill you with false hope that something will change between us. But, right now I'm going to make you a promise, I want you to listen closely and take what I say to heart." Miles exhaled, taking a moment to let himself get caught up in Alex's brandy colored eyes. The uncertainty in Alex's in them makes Miles' heart shudder in his chest. "I Miles Kane, promise you, Alex Turner, that no matter what happens, no matter how our friendship changes there will never be a day that you can't come to me. I'll always be here for you unless the time comes that you don't want me in your life anymore."

"Y-you mean it?" Alex asked, his eyes starting to sparkle again although Miles gets the feeling that these might be tears of a different sort.

"You have my word," Miles nodded, leaning in to kiss Alex hard on the lips, trying to convey just how serious he is. He needs Alex to believe that he's a man of his word.

"Ok... I trust you," Alex said in barely more than a whisper when they finally break the kiss.

"Good. Let's go to bed love. It's been a long day," Miles said. He was hoping maybe a good cuddle might calm Alex down some.

"Just one more marshmallow first?" Alex asked batting his eyelashes with an innocent smile.

"Alright, but that's the last one," Miles laughed. How could he say no.


	10. Kids With Guns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Back to back shadow play this close together? Yup because I was massively excited about this chapter and... I think you'll be able to see why soon. Hope you enjoy and um please try not to hate me to much my fragile little heart cant take it lol. Anyways lemme know what you think! love you all <33333

"That's crazy. I can't believe that he actually called your parent's house," Jay says into the receiver of his phone. There's almost a smirk on his lips and part of him wants to snigger, but he'll resist because he knows that it would be unkind.

"I'm honestly surprised that he didn't think of it before," the voice on the other end of the phone replies. "Crazy timing too, I was round for a visit but I'd gotten to the pub with a couple of mates. Good thing or I would have been home and probably would have answered. Mum told him that I was there too."

"So you're still not going ready to talk to him?" Jay asked. Eugene sighed on the other end of the line.

"No, I don't think so. I know it's been a while, but if I'm honest they might never be a time that I'm ready to face him," He muttered into the receiver. "I'm actually surprised that he didn't show up on the doorstep. I'm a little confused really..."

"Did you want him to show up?" Jay asked rolling over on Jeff's black bedspread and looking up at the mirrored ceiling. He fixed his hair a bit in the reflection, examining his body admiring the way his white and navy starred shirt clung to his chest and rode up slightly on his hip leaving a line of skin between its hem and the top of his skinny jeans.

"No.... maybe. I don't know. I just always thought if he ever found out where I was that... well, if he showed up on his own I wouldn't have much of a choice about seeing him, would I? That would take all of my second guessing out of the equation, but I'm still not sure that I would want to see him in the first place..." Eugene complained.

"Then have I been reading this situation all wrong the whole time. Have you secretly been waiting for me to open my mouth about where you were?" Jay asked.

"Absolutely not! If it had come from you I'd never have spoken to you or anyone else ever again." Eugene said firmly. It's not like he's spoken to anyone other than Jay in the first place. He knew that Jay was someone that he was able to trust. He also wasn't exactly in the dark about possibly selfish reasons that Jay wouldn't want to confess to Miles about his whereabouts. Somehow that had made Eugene trust him that much more with the truth.

"I wouldn't have told. You asked me not to, you know that I wouldn't betray you like that. I wish you'd come around once in a while though. I miss you," Jay confessed.

"I miss you too," Eugene nodded although Jay cannot see him.

"Do you ever miss Miles?" It's the question that Jay has been wanting to ask for quite a long time. In the beginning, when Eugene had reached out and begun speaking to him again after his departure he knew that Eugene missed Miles. Over time things had seemed to change. Although they spoke frequently, they didn't often speak about Miles. It was a touchy subject as far as both of them were concerned, so they avoided it altogether. Now that Miles had tried to get in contact with Eugene and almost succeeded this time around it was a reason for them to finally discuss the things they'd been avoiding.

"Of course I do, all the time. I still love him. I'm just glad that I've got you around to keep an eye on him ..." Eugene bit his lip awaiting Jay's reaction, biting down hard enough to make him hiss as he tasted a drop of iron. Jay's silence is no great comfort to him.

"... Eugene I think he might actually be moving on." Jay tells him with a nervous shiver in his voice.

 

"What do you mean?" There was no way that Miles would Miles would be the first out of the two of them to move on. He was sure that was impossible unless "Wait... is he... is he finally starting to fall for you or-"

"No, I wish... I mean I'm sorry but I do," Jay shrugged, although over the last few days he's finding that to be less and less true. "Truth is he's drifting away from me too." Eugene fidgets with the case on his phone for a moment before working up the courage to ask.

"Who is it then?"

"There's this new boy. His name is Alex," Jay sighed. He doesn't want to waste his breath talking about Alex but he knows that Eugene will probably have questions to ask.

"What makes him so special? How did they meet? What Makes you think that Miles likes him?" Of course Jay was right about the questions.

"I guess they met because the kid was at one of Matt's events which is bullshit because he's only eighteen!" Jay growled. "There is absolutely nothing special about him. He's like a knock-off version of you without half the personality and he's got a huge mouth. Miles just likes him because he's a virgin and he looks a little like you if you squint. I'm hoping that it's still going to phase and that he's going to fuck him and then get rid of him, but who knows at this point. All I know for sure is that he's been blowing me off for the kid. Last weekend he came to my show at Glasslands -"

"Oh yeah, I mean to ask you! How did that go? It was with the new band you're in right?" Eugene asked.

"Yeah, the show went great actually! The performance part of it did at least. After I was trying to talk to Miles and he was all distracted talking. The only thing he talked about the entire night was how Alex was mad at him and he was trying to figure out how to get him to speak to him again. He actually asked me for ideas. I don't think I've ever been so mad, like, EXCUSE ME?! I just played my ass off. I was sweaty, my shirt was sticking to my arm muscles, I wore REALLY tight pants and I still couldn't get him to focus on me for more than ten minutes. I ended up going home with Jeff because Miles was too distracted for my taste," Jay grumbled.

"That's fucked up mate. I can't believe he'd do that to you. Or be able to resist you like that. You always look so good after you've been playing. Guess Jeff got lucky," Eugene joked to cover how uncomfortable the idea of this new boy was making him.

"Aw, you're just saying that because you miss me," Jay said. "and... Jeff's been having a lot of luck recently." He smirked looking up at himself in the mirror again. "Liiiiike every night this week," He added biting his lip.

"What? You serious?" Eugene asked.

"Yeah, I haven't been home since the show. I've been over at his. We're getting used to living together because we actually are waiting to close on this place we're buying together in TriBeCa." Jay smiled at the thought.

"What, you're not serious!" Eugene said. Now, this was news that he could actually get excited about. It seemed to make Jay happy too which was always a plus. "You two are actually buying a place? TOGETHER?"

" I mean, yeah. What's the big deal? He's my best mate. If I'm going to live with anyone it might as well be him. It's not like we're a couple or anything. We're getting a two bedroom and if one of us decides to move on we already agreed we'll buy the other out or we'll rent the place and split the profit. So even if it doesn't work out then, really, it still does." Jay explained.

"Are you sure, spending a whole week at his house sounds a bit couple-y to me," Eugene laughed.

"No, no it's not like that," Jay said, sitting up on the bed and reaching for a jar or weed and rolling papers that were sitting on the nightstand. He opened it and pulled out what he would need to roll a joint. "Hate to tell you but I'm still a bit enamored with your boy. I haven't given up hope yet. He'll get bored with Alex soon,"

"You really think so?" Eugene asked. "Why do I get the feeling that you don't like this Alex character much?"

"Because he's a kid! He's a kid that has no place in our lives! He's an obnoxious little loud mouth that just waltzed in and fucked up everything! Miles is just using him to replace you and it's unhealthy," Jay insisted.

"You keep calling him that, loud mouth. Did something happen?" Eugene asked.

"Yeah, we were at one of Matt's raves-"

"Oh, I miss those!"

"Right, well, the kid doesn't know how to handle a goddamn tab off E. We were having a chat and he, out of nowhere, went off on the three of us," Jay explained. "He was shouting that Jeff was in love with me and that if Miles was still in love with you -" Jay cut himself off finally remembering exactly what it was that Alex had said. " Oh my god... he actually listened to him."

"What? Who listened to who?" Eugene asked.

"Miles! Miles listened to Alex. Alex was the one who suggested that if he was still so into you that he just call your family because they would know where you were!" Jay remembered.

"That..." Eugene isn't even really sure what to say. "Maybe that means that he's not getting over me. Maybe he's just using this boy as a distraction."

"I don't know if I would go that far, love. He seems to be pretty intent on keeping the little fucker around or at least getting into his pants. He's already given him a protection collar and get this! He's blowing off Jeff's Gallery opening in Greenpoint in order to go camping with Alex this weekend. How ridiculous is that?"

"That's so messed up! He's known Jeff forever. Even I know how hard he's been working on this and I'm not even there," Eugene said, he can't believe that Miles would ignore something that was so important Jeff of all people.

"Probably because I'm always telling you about his work," Jay said biting his lip and looking down at the rolled join in his hand.

 

" It's practically all you talk about," Eugene teased.

"What can I say, I'm proud of him," Jay couldn't help but smile. "He works so hard, and he's so talented. It's wonderful to see him finally getting the recognition that he deserves.

"I wish that I could see his new work rather than just hearing about them,"

"He forbid me from taking any pictures of anything until the gallery opening, but he's got everything spread out all over the house while he's getting prepared. Maybe I can snap a photo or two when he's not looking. That OR you could come visit at some point and see them for yourself, maybe spend a couple of day with us. Miles is bound to need to go out of town for work at some point soon," Miles laughed. "I miss you and I'm sure Jeff would be thrilled if you came,"

"I'll think about it, anyways I've got to go. I'll talk to you soon," Eugene said before hanging up.

"Yeah, bye," Jay ended the call, sitting up on the bed and putting the joint he'd rolled into his mouth, sparking the twisted end of the paper. He got up, walking out into the large brightly lit living room. Jeff's current apartment has a similar layout to their new one except on a smaller scale. Other than the bedroom and bathroom everything was just one large room, open and brightly lit.

Jeff sat in the middle of the floor with a canvas out in front of him and several tubes of paint, the color contents of which he was furiously mixing trying to achieve just the right shade of blue with an exasperated look on his face. "Working on a new one? I thought you were done," Jay said, sitting down on the floor next to Jeff and offering him the joint.

"I dunno. I can't decide on what pieces that I actually wanted to display. It feels like there's something missing and a couple of them I don't feel are really the best I could do. I'm not sure about that one." Jeff said, pinching the joint in between his fingers and pointing towards a long since dry canvas that leaned beneath the window.

"You can't pull that one out! It's one of my favorites!" Jay said, trying to make Jeff feel better. He leaned against his side knowing that it would force Jeff to put his brush down. " You're getting nervous and you're being over critical of yourself."

"Who were you talking to do for so long?" Jeff asked, changing the subject away from the show and his work.

"Eh, nobody," Jay shrugged. He still hasn't mentioned to anyone else that he's been speaking to Eugene on a consistent basis since about a month after he had abandoned ship.

"Must have been someone, you were giggling like a little a teenage girl." Jeff rolled his eyes, handing the joint back to Jay and pushing him away so he could continue to waste more paint in vain for the perfect color that would never come. "You're not seeing someone are you?" He knows it couldn't be Miles that he was talking to or he wouldn't have bothered to go in the other room to answer. There must be a reason or the secrecy.

"No, of course not," Jay said biting his lip. With Eugene considering coming to see Jeff's work maybe now was a good time to mention that they had been in contact. "Actually... if I tell you who I was talking to will you promise not to freak out on me?"

"...Depends on if it's something that I should freak out about or not," Jeff shrugged. Jay was worried that might be his response. Jeff has quite a temper and from time to time it can get a bit out of hand. With him being so stressed with the impending opening of his first show maybe now wasn't the time to press his buttons. On the flip side, Jay likes to be smacked around a bit and angry sex on the floor might actually do Jeff some good to loosen him up. It could very well we worth the risk.

"I... I was talking to Eugene," Jay admitted.

"WHAT! You can't be serious! He actually called you?" Jeff asked blinking in surprise.

"Um, yeah he did." Jay bit his lip. "It's actually not the first time either. We talk at least once a month. I give him updates on everyone and-"

"SO YOU'VE KNOWN WHERE HE WAS THIS ENTIRE TIME AND YOU DIDN'T TELL MILES?" Jeff shouted getting to his feet.

"I couldn't tell him! If I'd told Miles then Eugene would have just run off again before Miles could get to him and cut all contact! At least this way someone knew where he was incase-"

"No, you kept it from him to be selfish because with Eugene gone you could have Miles to yourself, did you even tell him about-"

"OF COURSE I TOLD HIM! You think I kept it from him for MYSELF? With how fucking MISERABLE he was?! Are you SERIOUS!" And there it goes, both of them starting to heat up. Maybe he should have kept his mouth shut for the time being.

"If you actually gave a shit about Miles you'd have told him that you knew where he was, or at least that you'd spoken to him. Fuck even just to tell him that Eugene was safe and hadn't been fucking abducted! You saw how worried he was you saw it every day the same as I did! We almost lost Miles last year! Don't you fucking get that. He could have died and you would have been to blame because you were keeping secrets you dishonest little fucker," Jeff yelled. "And if you didn't tell him then at least you should have told me! "

"I COULDN'T! How would I have been able to trust you not to tell Miles because collar or no collar you're still his loyal little dog!" Jay retorted earning him a shove back into the wall. Jeff held him there with his hands on Jay's shoulders avoiding the urge to slip one to his throat

"Take that back. You know I'm no one's dog," He growled. "Especially not Miles'. He's my brother and at least I have some sense of loyalty to the people that I love,"

"You don't love anyone Jeffery, you just string people along," Jay grumbled. "You two are the same like that."

"Don't change the subject. We're not talking about what's wrong with me we're talking about the fact that you've been lying to all of us. How long has this been going on?" Jeff asked.

"Since about a month after he left. He called me and wanted to know if Miles was ok... told me to take care of him," Jay sighed as Jeff started to back off finally.

"So he does care about him? That's a shocker," Jeff scoffed walking back to his space on the floor to go back to his work.

"He does, he's always cared about Miles!" Jay insisted.

"Yeah, then why did he leave him like that. If you care about someone you don't destroy them like that. You don't just walk out!" Jeff insisted. Jay really doesn't want to hear anyone talk about his friend like that, not even Jeff.

"You just don't get it. There are two sides to everything Jeff! If you knew why he left then-"

"I don't care why he left. Don't just run away from your life like a coward when things get hard... It's a fucking cop out and it's WRONG!" Jeff growled

"Because you have such a great moral compass when it comes to right and wrong," Jay grumbled

"Get out," Jeff muttered, letting go of Jay and returning to his place on the floor.

"What?" Jay asked rubbing his shoulder. Jeff hadn't slammed him that hard, but it was enough to leave the area sore.

"I said get out. I don't need all this extra stress right now. I need to concentrate and you defending Eugene is only going to cause a conflict. I thought you loved Miles but if you really wanted him to be happy you would have told him and you'd have done it a long time ago. Telling yourself any different is just an attempt to justify your selfish intentions," Jay narrowed his eyes as he turned back to his painting.

"Fine, I'll go." He grumbled. " And I'll chalk all of this up to you being insecure about your work because the show is in a few days but you're not looking at this from both sides right now. You're just jumping to conclusions. He called me tonight because Miles had tried to contact his parent's like Alex had suggested and Eugene freaked out," Jay told him, putting his boots. "He's excited to see your work by the way. I've been bragging to him about how great it is. He was actually thinking about coming to see us so he could support you. I'll tell him not to come." He called to Jeff across the room before slamming the door. Jeff sat in silence for a moment before putting his fist through the half painted canvas in front of him. He smoked the rest of the joint allowing himself to calm down.

Moments like this are exactly the reason that he can't be honest with Jay. He can't be with him. He's quick to snap and slow to cool. He also sees the worst in everyone else without being able to take responsibilities for his own faults. He can admit them to himself but never to anyone else. Criticism isn't something that he can readily accept and the only way he's ever been able to deal with it through confrontation which he will claim over and over again isn't his fault. Paul had tried to alter those traits in him, train it out of him. He'd been mildly successful, but somethings would never change.

It made him and Jeff an even match. The ultimate love story. The sadist and the masochist. A night with Jay was like an antidote that sucked the poison from him the rest of the time. Jay was a drug, his medicine and that's why he loved him, but to actually have him might turn him into an addict. The one person who understood this most of all was Miles, hence why Jeff felt had such an overwhelming sense of devotion to this man, making this seem like an ultimate act of treason by Jay of all people. Jay was kind, he was sweet and guiltless. In Jeff's eyes, he could do no wrong and occasional jealousy aside.

He walked over to the other side of the room and picked up the last blank canvas that he had and went to put it on the easel that he'd been working with. He was about to replace it when he took a second look at the busted and blue toned piece of half-finished work in front of him. He set aside the clean canvas instead picking up his paint pallet again and continuing with his original concept. There was something about the now damaged piece that seemed somehow right to him as if it was more close to what he'd been trying to achieve in the first place. The destruction spoke to him, so he lit a cigarette and went back to work, letting his mind wander as he did.

Eight. He'd been eight years old when he'd first run off. Being alone on the streets seemed preferable to the things happening in his home. His parents, both addicts hardly noticed his disappearance. He'd never once though after the fact to ask what had happened to them although from time to time as he grew older he would occasionally check the obituaries when he snagged a newspaper from the stand on his way past.

It hadn't taken more than a few days of sleeping in the park, hiding in the plastic tunnels of the playground equipment to hide from the rain and anyone who might want to cause him harm before someone did eventually find him. However, it wasn't his family or the authorities that found him. No, it was a teenage boy double his age, with sandy blond hair, blue eyes, and a missing front tooth that made his grin seemed much more innocent then Jeff ever should have believed.

As it turns out the boy's name was Damon and before the night was over he had coaxed Jeff out of the tube and into the open. They were one in the same the two of them. Damon told Jeff stories of how he'd run away as a child much like he had. According to Damon, there was a whole group of children like him including one boy named Seye who was nearly the exact same age as he was. He told him that if Jeff would just follow his lead then he would show him how to protect himself on the streets. He would teach him what he would need in order to get by on his own. So, he followed Damon back to his gang of juveniles, unaware that knowledge wasn't the only thing that Damon would arm him with. As he got older he would eventually arm him with a gun as well.

In years to come, Miles would jokingly refer to this as his 'Olive twist period' except with less singing and dancing and more criminal intentions. By the time he'd reached eighteen Jeff had spent almost as much time in the prison system as he had out of it. His charges ranged from petty theft to assault and battery. He never worried about how much time he would spend on the inside. He was a minor after all and was fortunate to have a silver-tongued 'guardian' who never failed to get him off with a lesser sentence. However, he knew that once be became an adult it wouldn't be like that before.

"Eighteen man, damn you're getting old," Seye laughed, "Gettin' old man," He added, clapping a hand on Jeff's back harder than intended causing him to trip slightly and spill a bit of the 40 of Olde English that he'd been drinking from a paper bag down the front of his torn black vest.

"Oh fuck off would you!" Jeff said wiping his mouth. "Made me spill my beer,"

"Don't worry about it. It's birthday beer! I'm sure you'll get plenty more today. Especially if we score tonight!" Seye rolled his eyes at his friend.

 

"Guess so," Jeff shrugged stopping in front of a building with a condemned notice on the front door and sitting down on the steps in front of it to drink his beer.

 

"Are you worried that Damon is going to throw you out of the nest now that you're not a kid anymore. Time to let his little bird fly?" Seye asked. He loves teasing Jeff. It's part of his daily routine of pickpocketing and drug peddling that he actually enjoys.

"Dunno hadn't really thought about it. He hasn't said anything to me. I'm hoping as that as long as I continue earning my keep that he'll let me stick around at least for now," When their other brothers had reached legal age it had been a mixed bag when it came to Damon's reactions. Some had been tossed out, others had gone on of their own accord, there had only been one other boy who had been allowed to stay and chose to do so. "Eventually... I don't know might be nice to live somewhere that's not falling down around us. Rent a room somewhere, get a decent bed, maybe I could do something with my life."

"And what exactly would you plan to do with your life Jeffery," Seye asked, taking a swing from his own brown-bagged bottle.

"I dunno, think I might like to be an artist or something," Jeff shrugged.

"An artist? Are you even listening to yourself? The closest that you've ever been to art is tagging! C'mon lets at least be realistic," Seye laughed.

"Fuck off. I can dream can't I?"Jeff grumbled.

"Boys like us don't have dreams. We have nightmares." Seye pointed out while Jeff pulled a cigarette from his pack.

"Fine, don't believe me, but when I'm a famous painter one day with a big warm apartment and a hot wife I'll be the one laughing and you'll still be doing the same shite you always do pushing and thieving. C'mon we better head back." Jeff grumbled getting to his feet.

"Don't you mean a sexy husband?" Seye joked.

"... I'm going to punch you,"

"I'm kidding, I'M KIDDING!" Seye yelped, running off as Jeff swung at him. He dodged down into the next alley. In the Alley and off the street Jeff took the now empty bottle in his hand and threw it down, aimed at Seye's feet. "HEY HEY HEY. These are leather! I just pinched them you twat!" Seye turned around chucking his own bottle, still partially filled at, the brick wall just inches from Jeff's head before running off again laughing the whole way.

A few blocks away stood an old warehouse. At one time it had been some sort of factory of unknown origins that currently stood in a state of decay. Slipping through a hole in the chain link fence both boys rounded the corner to the large panel door of what at one point had been a loading bay for trucks. Jeff slipped a hand under the bottom of the metal door locating the latch that allowed them to open it and pushing it up. The front three rooms lay abandoned for the time being so that anyone who might wander their way in wouldn't immediately see the group that had been squatting there for some time now. In the back half of the block, the main room was buzzing with activity. There the boys milling around ranged in age from ten to sixteen and were doing everything from cutting and packaging drugs for street sale to, sleeping on one of the several mattresses that cluttered the various corners of the space.

Jeff and seye paid little attention to the other boys, walking right past them through the room to a door on the other side opening and walking in closing it behind them. Being the oldest in the group the two shared senority. Although Seye had been around slightly longer than Jeff, Jeff with all his hard work had always been the golden boy. Not that this mattered, both boys were more than fine with sharing credit when it came to their work. Their years of dedication had led them to getting one of only two spaces that had actual doors, doors that everyone else knew better than to open. They shared the room, that had probably been for storage in the building's functional days. The other room was Damon's.

"Is it bad that I almost hope that Damon kicks you out?" Seye joked. "Then I would have our whole room to myself!" He justified, flopping down on his old torn mattress. It could hardly be considered a bed, but it was his own.

"Not like he won't be kicking you out soon too. You're not that much younger than I am," Jeff scoffed.

"Nah, I would miss you if you were gone. What's Thunder without lighting?" He asked.

"It isn't half as threatening on its own," Jeff nodded. He and Seye had always worked as a team ever since they were children. Their strength has always come from their ability to rely on each other. Although it had becoming clear in recent months that Jeff was becoming more and more of a solitary creature, retreating from the others. Whether this was out of concern for his impending dismissal upon reaching adulthood or if something more sinister Seye hadn't been sure.

There was an abrupt set of bangs on the door that could hardly be considered knocks before the door burst open. Damon stood in the doorway, apple I his hand as he vigorously chewed the chunk in his mouth as he speaks. "Need to talk to you, come with me," Damon said pointing to Jeff. "Come on we're goin' on a walk,"

"D it's his birthday! You're not really going to toss him out tonight are you?" Seye asked, suddenly feeling bad for joking about the topic. His worries were quickly put at ease by the incredulous look on Damon's face.

" 'M not kicking him out, but we don't have time for silly things like birthdays. If anyone wants to eat tonight then we've got work to do." Jeff was already on his feet, following Damon out of the room and snatching the apple from his hand taking a bite before handing it back.

"Didn't your mother ever teach you not to talk with your mouth full?" Jeff said as they walked to the other end of the warehouse and out the bay door. "So what did you want to talk to me about,"

" Haven't got one, but I have got an assignment or for you," Damon said, taking one of Jeff's cigarettes from his pocket and tossing it into his mouth, managing to catch it successfully for once where he would usually fail. Regardless of this accomplishment, it earned him a dirty look from Jeff, who snatched the unlit smoke straight from Damon's mouth. "Didn't your mother ever teach you to share?"

"I haven't got one, but I have got cigarettes and it looks like you don't," Jeff retorted.

"Sometimes I wonder why I didn't feed you to the dogs years ago you little ingrate," He means it out of love. Their insulting Jabs at each other are the closest thing to an ' I love you' that either man is capable of. "But, I didn't and for that, you should be thankful. Under my wing, you've made it to adulthood." It's said somewhat in jest, but Jeff knows full well he does own Damon quite a lot. "Now, it's time for you to man up. I've got a hit for you."

"A hit, are you SERIOUS?" Jeff asked. It wasn't like he didn't have a pension for violent crime. He'd been in plenty of spats in the past that ended with someone dead but that usually wasn't intended. Being a part of a street gang came with a risk of violence, it was just a part of the territory, but being handed a hit, that was something entirely new to him. " I-I don't know if I can-"

"Yes, you can and you will. I've been scoping out this place or a while. Guy's a fashion designer. Within his flat, there's enough of value that if we play our cards right you, seye, and I could get ourselves the hell out of here and be set for life. Maybe go to Africa or something where no one would be able to track us down. We could live like kings," Damon explained, but in Jeff's mind, there's something that just doesn't add up.

"But why this guy? Why not just sack any posh fucker? And why do I have to kill him?" Jeff asked.

"See that's the problem here. The reason that I was scoping him out in the first place. I think he's on to us and it's due to that little detour you and seye took to that freak club," Jeff's heart nearly stopped. He didn't think that Damon had found out about that.

"We... we were making a deal, the club's owner wanted to pick up a large quantity and asked if we would come to him and-"

"And then you stuck around pretending to be playboys. I don't give a fuck what your excuse is the point is you were caught and now this bastard has to be dealt with. You think I wasn't keeping an eye on your two. Like I would let you just walk off with half a kilo, no man is that trustworthy," Damon snapped. "Now before he starts sticking his nose where it doesn't belong I need you to go and take care of this." Damon reached into his pocket and pulled out a slip of paper. "This is the address, I expect it to be done by morning."

"Right...sure..." Jeff said, pocketing the slip and lighting himself another cigarette.

"You better not fuck this up," Damon said, turning his back to walk back to the warehouse. "Oh and Jeff?"

"Yeah?"

"Happy Birthday,"

It's barely past the stroke of midnight when Jeff, covered head to toe in black, manages to slip his way in through a window into the house he was told to hit. He felt as though he'd done well so far. Usually breaking and entering is not his area of expertise, but he hadn't seemed to alert anyone in his attempt to remove the window panel.

He slipped in, slinking like with the grace of a panther in the shadows of the wall. It was late enough that he figured the old man would be in bed by now. He could simply slip in, put a bullet in the guy's brain, take what he wanted and be on his way. With the silencer on his gun and the lack of shattered glass, his neighbors would be none the wiser. This plan is thwarted when he put his hand on the door of the master bedroom to open it and someone on the other side turned the handle at the same time. All the sudden he was faced with a boy who couldn't be much older than himself. That was the only detail of him that his mind processed before his shaking hand dropped the gun and he heard the shot go off as it hit the floor. A white-haired man had in a matter of a millisecond sprung forward and pulled the boy away pushing him back into the bedroom and dove to retrieve the gun from the floor. None of these things are registering though, the only thing that's present in Jeff's mind is pain. It's not the worst he's ever felt, not by a long shot. But, it had happened so unexpectedly that it was as if it left his bones vibrating as he dropped down quickly to one knee to cover the wound.

This was it. It was over. The older man had his gun an from the shadows cast on the floor it was obviously pointed directly at his head. Jeff has always been strong, or at least he's put on being strong because to live a life like him you had to maintain a calloused disposition, lack of empathy, and hard demeanor. However, as humans an inherent fear of death is natural so when he looks up at the man he assumes is about to put his lights out it's with tears in his eyes.

The man has silver hair, obviously inspired by the mod era. His skin is wrinkled but in a way that makes him look distinguished rather than elderly. His eyes are a deep brown and although currently filled with rage they elude to the fact that on a normal day they could be full of kindness and wisdom. The veins protrude from his steady hands which are wrapped around Jeff's gun as he stands in the doorway in nothing but fitted black trousers.

"Christ, you're just a kid..." He says pulling the gun away but still holding it far out of Jeff's reach. That voice. Jeff recognizes the voice and all at once he knows exactly who the man is. He remembers seeing him at the club with the very same mop-headed boy that now stood quivering in fear behind him. He was one of the Doms. "C'mon, get up. Can you get to your feet? Let's have a look at that leg," He retreats slightly into the room never taking his eyes off Jeff for even a moment. He opens a safe next to the bed and places the gun inside, closing it so that it's locked away.

"Y-you're not going to k-kill me?" Jeff asked. He feels like a coward for allowing his voice to shake but all at once he's never been so happy for the kindness of a stranger.

"You're so young," There's a note of sympathy in his voice. "Someone must have put you up to this or you'd have shot instead of dropping your weapon," The silver-haired man approached Jeff again helping him get to his feet, help which is gladly taken. No wounded animal will ever back down from aid even if offered by the friendliest looking predator. He allowed himself to be dragged into the master bathroom, sitting on the side of the tub with his leg up on the ledge and his back against the wall "You don't have anything else on you that could potentially harm me do you?" He asked.

"No..." Jeff muttered.

"And there's no one elses in my house? You were acting alone?" He already assumes this to be true as no one else had come running upon hearing gunshots.

"Just me..."

"How did you get in?" is the next question.

"G-guest room window," Jeff is loosing quite a bit of blood things around him are starting to spin. He's been shot before but this time... this time seems different or maybe that's just the fear and adrenaline talking. He wants to run away but simultaneously is glued to the spot.

"Miles, will you bring me the first aid kit, please. It should be on the bed still from earlier."

"Yes, sir," the boy with the bowl cut, apparently named Miles, responded scurrying off to retrieve it.

"I'm going to need you to calm down kid. You're loo\sing a lot of blood and panicking is only going to make it worse. How about you keep talking to me yeah? Take your mind off it. What's your name?"

"J-J-Jeff." He manages to stammer out.

"Well Jeff, I'm Paul and I'm going to go ahead and help you alright?" Paul tells him as Miles comes rushing back in with the first aid kit. He brings it to Paul but keeps his distance from Jeff. "Thank you, Miles, now off to bed with you." He said.

"But Sir-"

"Now Miles," He says with a tad more authority.

"Alright..." Miles nods as Paul puts the first aid kit on the counter his give Miles a quick kiss and pushes his hair out of his face.

"Good boy. You can sleep in my bed tonight, I'll be there shortly." He adds as Miles scampers off into the bedroom. As Jeff watches he feels a certain wave of jealousy wash over him similar to how he'd felt the night he and Seye had gone to the club. For once he'd like someone to pay him some attention, or at least tell him he'd done well.

Paul settles back on the tile floor in front of Jeff. He's not got rubber gloves as well as gauze and bandages. "How old are you Jeff?" Paul asks as he puts pressure on the would causing Jeff to hiss.

"'s my birthday... eighteen," he slurs

"Incredible, you're only a year younger than my Miles," Paul said trying to make conversation to help keep Jeff conscious and his mind off the pain. As Paul proceeds to clean and bandage the wound he continued to ask general questions that wouldn't spook Jeff. Things like his favorite color (It's green) or his favorite football team (Manchester United OBVIOUSLY) or how he takes his tea. Things you might ask a stranger that only give you very general information about them.

Jeff starts to come back more and more into his own head as the bleeding stops. Soon he's feeling much better although still in pain but cannot for the life of him figure out why someone he was going to shoot would be so kind to him. Before he can question it though Paul tapes down the final edge of the bandage.

"There were go, all done." He said standing back to look over his work and really taking in Jeff's appearance for the first time. His jeans which had been discarded on the floor were torn in several places and could hardly be considered black any longer when seen under bright lights. His shirt wasn't in much better shape, coming apart at the hem, torn at the neck. His face was dirty or bruised it was hard to distinguish the difference. His frame was thin and even the layers of muscle didn't help its skeletal appearance. "When was the last time that you had a hot meal and a decent night's sleep?" Jeff only reply is with his eyes as if he's begging not to have to answer. "Right... C'mon lets go downstairs I'll get you something to eat think you can hobble around a bit?"

"Yeah, not the first time I've been shot. Just the first time I wasn't expecting it." Jeff sighed getting shakily to his feet.

By the time he's into his third bowl of whatever mystical mash-up of leftovers Paul had given him Jeff was starting to become suspicious of his good fortune. He put his fork down staring into the bowl for a moment. "Why are you being so nice to me?" He asked, "I was going to kill you."

"No, you weren't. Like I said already if you were going to do it you'd have fired when that door opened, but you dropped your weapon which tells me you were nervous. You didn't want to kill me,"

"If I wanted to or not doesn't matter... I've got to... What I want doesn't play a role in any of this. I don't have a choice." Jeff said he can't resist any longer and picks his fork back up because he's still hungry.

"You think you don't have a choice because no one has ever given you one before. Tonight I'm giving you a choice." Paul said.

"Oh... and what's that?" Jeff asked.

"I know your type Jeffery I was very troubled as an adolescent too. Let me guess, you've been in and out of the youth prisons a few times now. They try to put you on the straight and narrow when really they judge you based on what you're in for and never truly care to listen when you tell them why you did what you'd done in the first place because they don't care if you're stealing to eat or fighting off some bastard who's trying to knock you out but you floored him first." The look on Jeff's face tells Paul that he's correct in his assumptions.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Jeff asked.

"The way I see it you have two choices. As of today you're an adult, you can either risk going to real prison when I call the authorities on you for breaking into my home with the intention of assault with a deadly weapon or you can choose to stay here with me and I'll help you to get on your feet because I have faith that no part of you wanted to come here tonight am I right to assume that?" Paul asked. Jeff's eyes went wide that wasn't how he was expecting this night to end.

"Are you serious?" He asked.

"Jeff I believe in giving people chances and you won't be the first like you that I've helped. I'm a man of means which so money is not a problem, but I also am a man of knowledge. One subject I'm particularly well versed in is BDSM. Are you familiar?"

"I saw you at that club the dungeon one. I was there with a friend doin' a deal. That's how this all started. My boss thought you'd caught on to us and would be a threat." Jeff confessed.

"While you were there did you see anything that you liked?" Paul asked.

"A few things," Jeff replied. "I saw you actually with um... what's his name."

"Miles, yes he's been with me for about a year now. He lives here full time usually I request that my boys do so I can be more hands-on with their training. I can teach you discipline, self-confidence, restraint and unlike your life now I can off you complete control over it in an environment where you are safe. In turn, you have to be willing to let go of what is behind you"

"Da- err, my boss will come looking for me." Jeff protested.

"Well, obviously we're not going to stay in this house after a break-in attempt. No, We'll probably go to my flat in London for a few weeks, maybe do a little traveling here and there." Paul said.

"...I've never been outside of Manchester before," Jeff muttered.

"Then it's about time. There's a whole world out there ready to be explored, show me that you can change and I'll introduce you to all of it in time." Paul said with a conviction that somehow makes Jeff want to trust him the same way that he'd trusted Damon on the first night they'd met. "So, what will it be? Jail or choose to stay. Even if you were to run I have your gun and your blood is all over my house now. They'd be able to identify you."

"I'll stay..." Jeff replied.

And just like that, everything had changed. A week later the three had moved to London full time where they would eventually meet Alexa, Matt, and Jay. In the future upon finally running into each other Seye told Jeff that they'd simply assumed when he hadn't returned that he was dead so they hadn't bothered to look for him. Damon had disappeared not long after rumor had it he was somewhere in Iceland while Seye himself had moved to London and become a haberdasher making avant-garde hats. Suddenly Jeff's idea of becoming a painter didn't seem so far-fetched to him anymore.

These days that is exactly what he was! A successful artist with a canvas in front of him that finally seemed to fit the final needs of his collection of work. Tormented swirling shades of sky and cerulean centered around the hole that was reminiscent of the scar on his leg from the night everything changed for him. Since then he had never looked back once. He's liked to show it to Jay, but he's already run him off.

Waking up in the woods is something that Alex has always enjoyed. He likes the misty gray of the morning mixed with the hazy light that comes through the trees. He likes the sounds of the birds unadulterated by city noise so you can hear each of their songs perfectly. What he likes best though, is that even though it's cool outside as soon as he starts to shiver he feels a pair of strong warm arms pulls him in tighter. That's new and he sure could get used to it.

It takes them a lazy half hour before they get up from the warmth of their tent. They would have stayed in their blanket cocoon a bit longer had Miles not insisted that he needed to pee. Alex decided that that would be as good a time as any to get up and go call Nick. Nick was an early riser so he would likely be awake already. When he opened the glove compartment and took out his phone he noticed something suspicious.

"Miles!" Alex called to him.

"What?" Miles asked, walking back into the campsite as he zipped his pants.

"Um, I know we said no phones and all, but I think something is wrong..." Alex said handing Miles his phone. His miss call log showed multiple missed calls from Jeff, Jay, and unknown London number (perhaps where Alexa was staying? He didn't know) and an unknown US number with an unfamiliar area code. The scariest thing though was the app that flashed telling him that the motion detectors on his home security system had been set off.

He tried to call Jay and Jeff back but neither answered. Likely they were at the gallery at which points their phones would be off if they were getting service at all. The London number was a no go either and the unfamiliar American number went straight to a non-descript voicemail leaving him no clues as to who the caller might be. " Fuck... Fuck no one is answering."

"What about Matt?" Alex asked.

"He's in Washington DC for a party he was promoting tonight Won't be back until tomorrow morning." Miles sighed. "Alex..."

"I already know what you're going to say and... it's fine. It's not your fault. No one plans to have their flat broken into. C'mon, I'll help you pack up the tent. Taking it down should take a lot less time then putting it up." Alex said giving Miles a sad smile. Miles quickly wrapped his arms around Alex pulling him into a tight hug.

"Thank you..." He muttered, kissing the boy's hair.

"For what?" Alex asked.

"Understanding,"

Things strewn about the campsite were sloppily tossed into the back of the car as quickly as possible. This morning Miles is more grateful than ever for Alex's seemingly boundless energy. They take the quicker route home rather than the picturesque roads from the drive there and it only takes about two and a half hours with Miles speeding like a bat out of hell until they're pulling into the parking garage next to his apartment leaving everything in the car. "I want to you to stay back behind me in case something is wrong," Miles said although he keeps telling himself that it was just a rat that tripped the motion detector... that could happen right? But it wouldn't explain the phone calls, would it? No, something was definitely up and as the elevator door opens Miles immediately spotted the source of the trouble sitting on his couch watching TV.

"Took you long enough to get here! Where were you? Sorry about the alarm. I still had my key so I let myself I hope you don't mine. You changed the code though and you weren't picking up your phone. I eventually got hold of Jay and he gave it to me. Sorry if I worried you." Miles just stared at the boy. His hair was shorter then it had been last time they'd seen each other and was slicked back but his face remains the same as if time has frozen it. Alex is giving the boy a confused look and Miles seemed too stunned to say anything when he speaks again. "Where are my manners. I'm Eugene, you must be Alex. Jay has told me loads about you!"

Alex's heart sank. Eugene, as in the only boy Miles has ever loved Eugene. Miles seemed to find his words again. "Jay? You've been talking to Jay?" He asked.

"Of course I have didn't he tell you? He was supposed to let you know I was safe but I didn't want to talk to you. I guess he just though with me out of the picture he could have you all to himself." It's said innocently enough to be the truth but Eugene knows it's a lie. "Guess I should have known better to than to trust him." Another hurtful lie, Jay had been nothing but a good friend to him but that didn't matter now.

"Why are you here?" Miles asked.

"Jeff's gallery opening obviously. He's one of my oldest friends! I had to come and support him." It's the first honest thing to come out of his mouth so far. "And... maybe there were other reasons too. I thought I could crash with you and maybe we could talk some things out? I didn't know you're going to be out of town with your boyfriend," Eugene says playing it Coy and looking down at his feet biting just the right amount on his lip to look as though he was genuinely nervous.

"He's not my boyfriend," Miles says quickly. Alex knows he's not but to hear it so easily dismissed in this context is hurtful.

"Sorry, I'm assuming too much again. I'd have asked before I came over but you weren't answering your phone when my flight came in and I thought it would be wrong to let you know that I was here over text. So I just came here and... I'm really tired but I just wanted to see you so bad Mi I've missed you so much," Eugene muttered.

"I think I should go," Alex said, turning around to head back to the elevator this is a conversation he neither needs to nor wants to be present for.

"NO!" Miles says quickly, grabbing for Alex's hand. Both Alex and Eugene are surprised by this reaction, blinking at each other as if they're sharing in the other's confusion. "Eugene go take a nap, I'll be back in a bit." He says dragging Alex back into the elevator with him.

On the ride back down to the ground floor, Alex can feel Miles hands shaking. " You alright?" He asked.

"No," Miles says bluntly as they exit his building at record speed. "You want breakfast?" He asks changing the subject. "I think breakfast might be good, yeah... or a drink what I really need is a drink. It's past eleven isn't it the bars should be open. Alright, so that's breakfast for you and gin for me. Great sounds like a plan thanks, Alex." Miles talks quickly.

"I didn't say anything?" Alex is still very confused but he can tell that Miles is overwhelmed and might be short-circuiting just the tiniest bit.

"Didn't need to. You're being everything I need you to be right now love. You have been all morning." Miles said putting an arm around Alex's shoulder and steering him down the streets of the west village. Alex just followed Along without another word.


	11. Bizarre Love Triangle Pt.1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! Sorry to have kept you waiting for this update for so long but it's a LOOOONGG chapter. So long, in fact, that I had to break it into two chapters! I'll post the second one either later tonight or tomorrow morning depending on when I finish up editing with it. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this. Let me know what you think your feedback gives me life.
> 
> Hope everyone has a wonderful new year and 2018 brings new opportunities for happiness to you and your families. Love you all <3333

"Miles...."

"Whaaaaat?" Miles complained, his head in his hands.

"Miles you have to eat something," Alex sighed as he picked at his food. After leaving the apartment Miles had started power walking uptown. It had been forty blocks before he finally stopped. Miles seemed to be in a trance as if he was the living dead. His eyes were wide open like he hadn't slept for days although they'd only awoken a few hours before. His skin was pail as if all the blood had been drained from him right along with his will to live. He appeared corpse-like as he shambled along until they finally stopped at a place where he could get a drink and Alex could get some lunch as it was now afternoon.

Six shots of gin on an empty stomach later the waitress had pulled Alex aside on his way to the toilet and told him that she was cutting Miles off. Alex has spent the last fifteen minutes trying to get Miles to eat anything he could off his plate which he'd flat refused.

"C'mon Mi, You're the one who is always encouraging me to take better care of myself and right now you're not setting a very good example," Alex said holding out half of his turkey sandwich to him and pouted his bottom lip.

"Don't call me that. You don't get to call me that, and you don't get to make decisions for me." Miles snapped as he batted at Alex's hand.

"Miles they're going to throw us out if you don't eat something to soak up all those drinks... please?"Alex asked giving Miles a pleading look. Miles sighed and picked up a couple of chips off of Alex's plate to satisfy him before slumping down in his seat again. He crossed his arms on the table in front of him, resting his chin on his forearm and looking off the other way out the window. This was all new to Alex, he never has and never hoped to see Miles in such a depressed state. Alexa had on a few occasions mentioned instances of how Miles had behaved when Eugene first left him, but she had never gone into the gory details.

"Happy?" Miles asked.

"Couple more? C'mon do it for me?" Alex asked giving Miles his best puppy eyes.

"Alright, just because you're cute," Miles half slurs the liquor is starting to settle in and Miles is fading fast. It might be time for Alex to get him out of there before he becomes totally useless. This turns out to be a good idea. As Miles gets up from the table he stumbles over his own shoes. He ends up using Alex for support while the boy hails them a cab uptown.

"I-I-" Miles hiccuped as they climbed the front steps. Luckily, the doorman had stepped away from his post which saved Miles the embarrassment of being seen in such a state when they enter. "I should go home and talk to Gene. I need to... I need ta see 'im."

"No, you shouldn't talk to him when you're drunk like this Miles. You're going to regret it later if you do," Alex said, trying to herd a very drunk Miles into his bedroom. "How about you just lay down for a while and sober up, then you can go talk to him,"

"You're smart Ales' Thas why I picked you. You're smart and you're kind and you're a real pain in the ass," Miles said.

"You couldn't have possibly known I was smart when you met me," Alex rolled his eyes dumping Miles on the bed. He immediately began to curl into the sheets until Alex grabbed him by the shoulder. " HEY! Shoes off! You'll get the linen's dirty,"

"Mmm," Was all that Miles replied with as he rolled over and grabbed one of Alex's pillows to snuggle with as it didn't seem like Alex had any intention of joining him. Alex sighed, kneeling down next to the bed and grabbing one of Miles' feet. He unlaced the shoe, pulling it from his foot and did the same with the other.

"You're useless when you're drunk aren't you," He half-jokes.

" 'M useless all the time," Miles complains, pulling his phone from his back pocket which Alex hastily intercepts.

"No, if you send anything now you're going to regret it. I'll take this, you sleep it off for a bit." Alex instructs.

He sits on the side of the bed for a moment, clutching the phone that Miles hadn't bothered to fight him for. Miles stared out the window on the other side of the bed, unblinking although the sun coming in from so high in the sky was causing a burning glare. "I don't want him to be here." It's oddly sober, the way that he says it. "I was finally starting to get back to normal. Everything was ok again. Now he's gone and turned it all upside down."

"Then tell him to leave," Alex sighed, running a comforting hand along Miles' spine, repeating the soothing motion several times.

"I can't, I'm not strong enough for that," Miles rolls over to look up at Alex. "I love him, and I'll just end up letting him destroy me like he did the last time." There's a hint of sadness and vulnerability in Miles' voice that Alex hasn't witnessed up until now. It almost made him believe that everything else Miles has ever said to him was nothing more than lies and this was the only truth he'd ever spoken. "At least with him, I know what to expect. It might as well be Eugene that breaks me, or someone else will just do it for him," He adds, reaching up to place a hand on the warm skin of Alex's cheek. He frowns and removes it quickly, rolling over again to fall asleep.

Alex got up, figuring it was best to leave Miles alone for a while. He wouldn't possibly have been implying that if Eugene didn't crush his heart that he himself would do it? No, Miles was drunk and emotional. He didn't know what he was saying. He sat on the couch, staring at the phone in his hand and the illuminated messages on the screen. There were several texts from a number not saved in Miles' phone. Judging by their contents (or what Alex sees of them when he'd quickly glanced down at the previews) they must be from Eugene. It would be wrong for Alex to read Miles' texts and he knows that, but he can't help but be a little bit curious. He swipes Miles' phone to open it, going to his messages.

I'm sorry that I surprised you like that. I should have told you I was coming.

Are you going to come back so we can talk?

Just tell me if you're mad at me, ok? I'll leave.

Miles, do you want me to go?

I don't want to, not without talking to you first.

Say something, you're worrying me!

All of the messages had come within the three hours since they had left Miles' flat downtown. The last one had been only a few minutes before. That must have been the buzz that had Miles reaching for his phone. He'd had it on him the whole time prior to that and all the messages had been left unread. Had Miles been too afraid to look at his phone? Alex couldn't remember him checking it at any point while they'd been together. Was he ignoring Eugene on purpose? That was the other option, but he seemed worried. It couldn't hurt to let him know what was going on, but he didn't want Eugene to think that Miles was answering him. So, Alex against his better judgment tapped the corner of the screen and let the phone ring.

"Miles?" Eugene picks up on the first ring.

"N-no, it's Alex," Alex stutters.

"Oh, sorry. I just figured... look I didn't mean to ruin your weekend and there's no need to tell me off I'll just-"

"I'm not doing any tellin' off it's not my place. I just wanted to let you know Miles... Isn't exactly in a state to talk to you himself right now, but don't worry about him." Alex sighs.

"What do you mean?"

"He power walked fifty blocks and then drank half his body weight in gin. He's at um- Alexa's." Alex said thinking it's probably best, for now, to leave out that he lives there too.

"Right, typical. Is Alexa there? I need to talk to her but she hasn't been picking up her phone." Eugene sounds a bit annoyed.

"No, she's in London until tomorrow. She's very busy." Alex of all people should know. He's the one who has been scheduling all her appointments. "I believe she's in a meeting at the moment."

"That would explain a lot. She'll be back for the gallery opening tomorrow right?" Eugene asked. Alex kept quiet for a moment before admitting what he's been thinking since the moment that the conversation started.

"I'm not sure what I'm allowed to tell you. There might be things Miles isn't comfortable with you knowing. I just wanted to let you know that he's sleeping. Before he passed out he was wanting to talk to you, but I can't say how he'll feel or what he'll want to do when he is sober," Alex said figuring that was neutral enough of him.

"Is that your way of telling me to fuck off?" Eugene asked, obviously he'd taken it the wrong way.

"N-no that's not what I'm saying at all... I just saw... I shouldn't have looked but the text said you were worried and I wanted to let you know he was alright." Alex sighed.

"Oh...That's very sweet of you actually. You seem like a nice enough kid. I don't know why Jay hates you so much." This statement is punctuated with an abrupt laugh. "Wait, yes I do. He hates you because he thinks you're replacing me."

"Everyone keeps saying that," Alex sighed.

"You do look a little like me when I was younger. Your hair is a longer and our bone structure is a little different. You're more feminine I'd say." Eugene said. "Jay says you have the personality of a rock, but I get the feeling that's an exaggeration. By reaching out to me it shows that you have at least some sort of character."

"I'd rather not be analyzed by you, thanks. I'm going to go-"

"Wait, don't hang up!" Eugene said. "I'm sorry, I just... All I have to go on about you is what Jay has told me and he doesn't exactly paint you in the best light. I'm curious about you and I'm sure you must be curious about me too."

"No, not really." That's a lie and a blatant one at that.

"Of course you are. You're the new flame and I'm the old one, it's only natural that we would want to know more about each other. How about this, I'll let you ask a couple questions if you let me ask a few of my own?" Alex should say no, he doesn't need to know more about Eugene than what Miles is willing to tell him.

"He says I'm nothing like you, that's all I need to know," Alex replies, trying to be strong in his convictions.

"What you need to know and what you want to know aren't the same things. I won't tell him, Alex. Not as long as you don't. He doesn't ever need to know that this conversation took place." Eugene smirks into his phone. He can practically hear Alex on the other end of the line buzzing with indecision.

"I shouldn't be talking to you, I'm sorry. I-"

"You know why I came back?" Eugene quickly cuts Alex off. "Because he called my family, and from what I've heard that was your idea. You're the one that encouraged him. Jay's told me you have a very loud mouth and that you like to meddle in other people's relationships. That makes me think that you're intentions for calling me aren't as pure as you want me to think and that you're not as innocent as you appear. I'm reluctant to hang up this phone until I know exactly what sort of person you are because I care about who Miles is with. Do you understand me?" It's all said so quickly and with a hint of a threat behind it that makes a shiver run down Alex's spine.

"I don't meddle! Miles gave me Ecstacy for the first time and I said some things I shouldn't have. I told Jay to stop pining over Miles because Jeff is in love with him and I told Miles that if he's so caught up on you then why not just call your family because they would probably know where you were and obviously they did," Alex tried to justify.

"You know whether he'll admit it or not, I think Jay is grateful to you for saying it," Eugene tells him. "He's been playing house with Jeff ever since you did and he seems really happy. I'm just curious as to how you knew that it was true. Jeff doesn't talk to people about his feelings."

"Miles told me," Alex admitted.

"Oh, he's already sharing secrets huh? He must like you." There's a note of teasing in Eugene's voice that Alex picks up on. "Just be careful with Miles. I dunno what he's told you, but he's a real piece of work sometimes."

"I've heard rumors, I'm choosing to ignore them. I'll let Miles actions speak for themselves," Alex said.

"That's stupid. That's like someone telling you that a house is on fire and you walk inside anyways," Eugene said.

"He's been kind to me. That's all I need to know for now. I think I'll go check on him now, bye." Alex has admittedly had enough of this conversation. He doesn't particularly want to get on speaking terms with Miles ex until he knows how Miles feels about him being around. Even then he still may not be interested. He likes Miles attention and Eugene being around again, even if only for a short time, might put that in jeopardy.

It's another four hours or so before Miles starts to come around again. When he does his head only has a slight ache much to his surprise. He's grateful for it. Alex is curled up at his side. He must have been watching him sleep and dozed off himself judging by the position that he was in. He puts a gentle hand on Alex's shoulder, giving him a little shake to rouse him. "Aly..." He mutters to him as the boy begins to open his eyes.

"Mmm, I fell asleep." He yawned, looking up at Miles with a smile on his face. "You feeling better?"

"Much. Thank you for putting up with my ridiculous behavior earlier," Miles said, combing his fingers through Alex's hair.

"It's ok. I get it. This wasn't exactly how you planned for today to go." Alex nodded, leaning further into Miles' touch. He lets the moment linger between them for a moment before deciding he needs to tell Miles what he'd done earlier. "I did something that I shouldn't have."

"And what was that?" Miles asked.

"I took your phone from you earlier so that you wouldn't drunk call Eugene, but then I saw that he'd texted you a bunch of times and that he was worried that you weren't answering him. So I called him and said that you weren't answering because you drank too much and I didn't know if you'd want to talk to him when you were sober or not," Alex confessed.

"You shouldn't have done that, but I see why you did. Promise me that you won't go through my texts again Alex."

"Promise me you won't get drunk in the middle of the day like that again?"

"Alright, deal. Did he say anything else?" Miles asked.

"He tried to tell me things about you but I wouldn't let him. I didn't want to hear it. All I need to know is what you show me," Alex said.

"You're either very loyal or very stupid. I'd like to think it's the former. Thank you, Alex," Miles said pulling him closer so that they were face to face.

"Loyal to a fault perhaps," Alex said pressing his body against Miles. "Are you going to go and talk to him?"

"In a bit. I need my wits about me to deal with Eugene." Miles sighed. "He's the master of getting what he wants and all too often I'm willing to give it to him."

"You could always just say no and tell him to leave," Alex suggested, sounding maybe a little too hopeful.

"No, I don't want him to leave again. I want answers. I need to know why he left. If it was something I did or-" Miles pauses and shakes his head. "I had to have done something. Just never been sure what. Usually, when I've done something wrong it's obvious."

"Why not wait until morning. Stay here with me tonight, gather your thoughts, and maybe let him get a bit anxious. He left you, why not make the impression that you don't take something like that lightly?"

"I don't have the heart to. I don't want him to leave just yet and... I don't want to stay and possibly lead you into believing that this is going somewhere that it isn't," Miles admitted.

"I wouldn't think it meant anything, other than that you needed a bit of time to sort yourself out," Alex shrugged. "Or if it's what you needed... I could be your distraction," Alex said, pressing himself slightly closer.

"A distraction is the last thing I need right now. I have to deal with this head-on." Miles says sternly. He doesn't push Alex away but instead gets up from the bed looking around for his shoes.

"In the corner."

"Right... and my phone?"

"Kitchen," Alex replies, still laying on his bed for another moment before getting up as well.

Miles walks out into the kitchen, retrieving his phone from the table top and looking over the texts now marked as read with a frown before he locked it and slipped it into his back pocket. "Right well.... I'll text you tomorrow or something." Suddenly the air between them is stiff and awkward.

"Sure," Alex says. He's trying his best not to show that any of this is making him nervous.

"Uh, yeah. Bye then." Miles heads for the door stopping momentarily as he opens it. "Oh, and Alex?" He says, causing the younger man to look up. "I don't know what's going to happen tonight, but I meant what I said yesterday. I'm in your life or as long as you want me to be, no matter what capacity that is in." Before Alex can reply though Miles has already gone, shutting the door behind him.

Downtown Miles stands in the entryway of the building, leaned against the metal plated mailboxes on the wall. The handles are leaving dents in his back as they have been for the last half an hour. He hasn't worked up the courage to go upstairs just yet, but he doesn't want to stand outside either or fear that Eugene might see him out the window and come down. Instead, he stood in the small room between the front door and the elevator with a lit cigarette in his hand. No doubt the landlord would have an absolute fit if he found out. He's not supposed to smoke inside, not that Miles had ever obeyed that rule. Other than the storefront on the other side of the first floor he practically had the place to himself. It didn't matter much what he did. He opened the door briefly letting a draft in as he flicked the butt out onto the sidewalk before finally pressing the button to call the elevator.

As he waits, the second tick by slower than usual. Each moment that he waited he could feel his individual heartbeat and the beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead.

Door open.

In the lift.

Fourth floor.

Door open.

As it does Miles is faced with his nightmare. Eugene is there waiting. He must have heard the motors running in the shaft. "Hi..." His voice is low, slightly shaken and mildly defeated. It takes everything in Miles power not to embrace him and wipe away those insecurities, but he has to be strong for the time being. He walks past Eugene, stopping to leave his shoes near the door. "I uh... I made dinner if you're hungry,"

"I'm not," Miles said, walking into the living room and sitting in his usual armchair while Eugene stays frozen to his place by the door as if by force of habit until Miles speaks to him again. "Come, sit. We have things to talk about." It takes every ounce of restraint he has to keep his voice cold. He can't let his emotions betray him like they are threatening to.

"You're upset with me aren't you?" Eugene asks, taking the seat at the end of the couch closest to Miles.

"No, I'm hurt. You hurt me I think you understand that," Miles said. He's trying his best to keep his composure at the moment which leaves him coming across a bit more stern then is needed.

"Miles... I can-"

"How long are you here for?" Miles asked before Eugene could get another word out. He's not sure that he wants to hear what he's got to say just yet.

"I don't know. I haven't booked my return flight just yet. Truth be told I'm missing the city and I want to see how things went over with you before I made a decision," Eugene admitted.

"So, does that mean you're thinking of staying?" Miles asked.

"Do you want me to stay?" Eugene asks quickly.

"I want to know why you left in the first place," Miles replies just as fast. "I thought you were happy. If you weren't then why didn't you just talk to me? We could have worked things out, but instead, you just disappeared in the middle of the night. No warning, no note, we hadn't even been fighting. I was afraid something happened to you."

"It's not that I wasn't happy. I was just young and scared I guess. I woke up in the middle of the night and realized that you had molded and shaped my world from the time I was a teenager and I no longer had control of my own life," Eugene sighed

"You were always the one in control of everything!" Miles shot back.

"Oh please, I was a glorified house pet. I realized one day that I was turning twenty-three and I had done fuck all with my life! For five years I let you make every major decision for me, and maybe that's on me but I was young I didn't know any better. I moved to America with you for god sakes! Just because you asked me to! I left home. I'd just turned eighteen! I was barely legal and you took me away from my family Miles! You isolated me knowing that you would have power over me."

"You didn't have to come with us," Miles said. Although when their makeshift family had been making their plans of escape he'd purposefully suggested a moving date after Eugene's eighteenth birthday.

"But you knew I was Naive enough to. You knew before you even asked that I wouldn't say no. I was young. I was enamored! Once I fell for you it was like nothing else matters, like if you walked away from me then life as I knew it would be over. Miles, I was a teenager... you were my first love, don't you remember what that felt like?"

"Yes. I remember my first love. I'm looking at him right now," Miles said, but Eugene brushes off the comment.

"It's not the same, you were grown when we met. I was a kid Miles. Hell, I wasn't even out of school!" It was true. Eugene had still been seventeen when he'd started seeing Miles. Not that Miles was too much older. Their gap between them was not quite four years. Eugene would be twenty-five in August, and Miles twenty-nine in March. It wasn't like the decade wide gap between himself and Alex.

They had met in a gay club one night in London. Eugene had been with a couple of friends who had been a year ahead of him in school and had already finished. As Miles would later learn they had given Eugene a fake ID in order to take him out with them. Miles hadn't thought twice about coming on to him that night. If he was in the club he must have been old enough. It wasn't until several weeks later, their fourth date, that Eugene had owned up to lying about his age. Miles had been rather upset but decided that he didn't want to stop seeing Eugene if he didn't have to, so he did what he thought was the right way and talked to Eugene's parents.

When they saw that Miles wasn't some predatory older man but in fact fairly young himself they'd had very little trouble with allowing him to continue seeing their son as long as he abided by the rules they set. Miles never broke them once. His curfew was eleven thirty on weekends. On weeknights, he wasn't allowed to go out, but Miles was allowed over if and only if Eugene had finished studying first. Much to his parent's delight, this was actually a motivator and Eugene's grades had improved after the agreement was made. On certain occasions, Miles would even help him study! Eugene wasn't allowed to go to Miles' house. That might have been a good thing as he was still living with Weller and Jeff at the time. Miles was also not allowed to spend the night, a rule Eugene begged him many times to break but Miles stayed firm, wanting to keep the trust of Eugene's family. Even before he knew he was falling in love he knew that Eugene was special and there was no way he would be willing to let him go.

"Come to America with me..." The words had come out one night without a second thought. They were laying on the couch watching a movie. It was Saturday and Eugene's parents had gone out for a date night of their own leaving the two with the house to themselves.

"What?"

"I said come to America with me," Miles repeated, pulling Eugene into his lap and slowly kissing a line from his ear down his neck as he waited for a reply.

"When?"

"Week after next," Miles muttered. "Monday," Eugene would be eighteen on the coming Wednesday.

"For how long?" Eugene asked.

"Forever... Eugene I'm moving. We all are," Miles said. He'd purposefully not mentioned it until now for fear that his impending departure might sabotage what was left of their relationship if Eugene said no. "Alexa, Jay, Jeff, Matt, and I. We made the decision a while ago."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Eugene asked, sitting up, a bit annoyed with Miles.

"I was waiting for the right time," Miles said, "It came down to finding the right moment to ask you if you wanted to come."

"Are you sure that us living together is going to be a good idea? We've never even spent the night in that same bed," Eugene said.

 

"I thought about that and Jay is still looking for a roommate because Jeff wants to live alone," out of everyone in Miles' circle of friends Eugene had gotten on the best with Jay so that didn't seem like a horrible idea. "And Alexa and I will only be a couple blocks away so you can spend as much or as little time at our flat as you want and you always have the option of going home. I know of waited until the last minute to ask but I can help you with your packing. We still have over a week and don't worry about the shipping or anything I can take care of it so you don't have to ask your parents for help.... I sort of already bought you a plane ticket, but if you don't want to move then you could just come for a week or so. We could see the city and have some fun, consider it your birthday present, or well part of it. I've already bought you a birthday present. Also if you decide to change your mind I can always get you a ticket home I mean-" Miles speaks quickly, he's nervous until Eugene's lips finally meet his to silence him.

"Yes, I want to go with you," He says, wrapping his arms around Miles' neck and kissing him again.

Miles swears he's only seen that broad of a smile on Eugene's face two other times in his life. The first time he told him he loved him, and the day he said he wanted to collar him properly. Now that smile has faded. Miles can't see even a glimpse of any happiness left in him at all.

"I know. You were too young and I knew that. Maybe I was selfish but we were happy. You knew all you had to do was say the word and you'd have been free. You didn't have to run away," Miles tried to reason.

"I panicked! I didn't know how to say to you that I...I felt cheated. How do you say that to a man who loved you and would have done anything for you?"

"Does love you and would still do anything for you," Miles corrected.

"You gave me everything I ever wanted Mi. How could I say that I still wasn't satisfied? I didn't want to be kept like some sort of trophy boy on your arm while you just continued to be more and more successful! I realized the thing that was missing in my life was the one thing that you couldn't give me and that was success of my own. I had to do that for myself and the only way I could was if I got out from being under your thumb all the time. So I ran. I just did it because if I'd given myself time to think about it then I wouldn't have the nerve. I left my phone because I knew if I spoke to you I would crack and come running home because I crave the way it feels to give you power over me..." Eugene is trying his best to explain but words can't quite justify the feeling of losing himself under Miles control for so long. He'd felt trapped, and he'd built the cage himself.

"Did you get what you wanted?" Miles asked.

"Some of it... I'm not exactly a famous director now but I like the work I do. The biggest thing was I needed to learn who I was as an adult separate from you and I think I've done that yes," Eugene nodded.

"You could have told me what you wanted. I'd have helped you! I-"

"No Miles, I had to do it without you, that's the point. It couldn't be tied to you or it wasn't truly my own accomplishment... besides, a good boy doesn't speak unless his master-"

"Don't start with that shit Eugene you know you were far more than a submissive to me. You were my partner! You were the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with!" Miles insisted.

"And I wasn't ready for that Miles! I didn't want that sort of commitment. I wanted to explore what else was out there. Monogamy wasn't for me and a year of it was enough to show me that. I wanted to see other people because that was the only time I got to have experiences that weren't directly tied to you. You were the one that wanted us to be exclusive. I was already your submissive and your boyfriend. You said as long as no one else was dominating me I could see anyone I wanted and then one day you decided to change that rule."

"It was a change that you agreed to." Miles retaliated. "After four years I didn't feel like being faithful was too much to ask for!"

"I only agreed because I felt like I had to! That's the whole idea of total power exchange. I gave up my safe word! You called the shots and I was like some god damn spoiled little show dog. That life is fine for some people but I'm not one of them and I had that god damn collar around my neck to make me feel guilty every time I thought I was letting you down."

"Why are you just telling me this now. You never had trouble expressing an opinion when we were together," Miles is confused and he's not entirely able to tell if Eugene is being truthful with him or if this is just more of the little games he likes to play.

"Yeah about where to eat or what I wanted to do but not when it came to the important things! I told you already I was scared! That's what it all comes down to I ran away because I was a coward and I had to learn to be brave on my own. I didn't know how to tell you that so I just DIDN'T!"

"Gene..." Miles got up from his chair, taking the seat next to him on the couch. He can tell the boy is starting to get worked up and if he starts to cry there's no way that Miles will be able to hold it together. "I would never have been disappointed in you for telling me the truth. I thought you'd have understood that. I'm sorry if I put too much pressure on you. I just... you were my everything. I love you."

"I love you too, Miles and... When you reached out to try and contact my parents it made me nervous but it also was sort of comforting to know that maybe you hadn't given up on me just yet, or that you still thought about me. I know I hurt you and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I didn't come back and..." Miles had been waiting for it he knew the tears would come.

"C'mon don't cry..." Miles puts a hand on Eugene's shoulder to test both of their limits. He doesn't want to spook Eugene and he also doesn't know if he wants to get to close himself for fear of getting burned.

" 'm sorry," Eugene mutters, wiping his eyes. "I promised myself I wouldn't get emotional... but it IS emotional. You know? I can't help it. It broke down the night mum told you me you called. I didn't know what to do..."

"That's how I felt when I saw you this afternoon," Miles admitted.

"I had talked to Jay about a week after. He was telling me that Jeff had the gallery opening coming up this weekend and I figure that would be as good of an excuse as any to come back. I figured if you didn't want to see me then I could just play it off as having come to support him and then head home right after," Eugene sighed. "I didn't know that you were going to be out of town with Alex...He seems like a nice kid."

"I know you spoke to him earlier," Miles said shaking his head. "I don't want to talk about Alex right now. I want to talk about us," Darn, Eugene had been hoping to learn some about Miles' relationship with the other man before this conversation went any further.

"What about us?" Eugene asked.

"Like does you coming back mean that there could possibly be an 'us' again?" Miles asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"I don't know Miles. I think there's a possibility, yeah," Eugene nodded turning to meet Miles' eyes. His eyes have always been his most powerful weapon against him.

"Out of curiosity, do you still have your collar?" Miles asked. Eugene smiled, getting up from the couch and walking over to his bag. From the front pocket, he plucked a currently unclasped silver metal collar.

"You mean this one?" Eugene asked with a smirk.

"How long did you wait before you asked someone to take it off of you?" Miles asked, unsure that he wants to know the answer until he's actually heard it. The collar that he had given to Eugene was known as an eternity collar and was supposed to be worn at all times. It could be removed but only with a specialized screwdriver.

"Three months... I didn't take it off for three months." Eugene confessed. "In case I changed my mind I didn't want to have to break that bond of trust."

"So what was it that finally got you to take it off then? A new Dom?" Miles asked.

"No, I decided if I was going to be happy with my new life I needed to start moving on. I couldn't let my memories of you rule my life anymore." Eugene sighed. "I haven't actually had another dom. I gave it a go myself, but I figured out it wasn't for me. Then I sort of gave up the kink world for a little while, decided to spend some time outside of the community. There's a great scene in L.A. And don't get me wrong there were plenty of boys but they were all a bit vanilla for my taste. I just couldn't stomach the idea of being with someone the way I was with you. Only you could have me like that and that's a rule I've never once broken," He slow way he says it, wrapping his arms around Miles' neck as he speaks, slowly pulling him in with each word he breathes until they're inches away and Miles can't take it a second longer. As soon as the words are out of Eugene's mouth Miles' lips are on his.


	12. Bizarre Love Triangle Pt.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok ok so this was supposed to be done yesterday but then I ended up hanging out with my friends last night instead (Oops sorry) I good news though now that this monster is finished I already have the next one started because I got excited about.... something you're going to see at the end of this chapter. 
> 
> Now it is very Cold and I'm going to try and squeeze myself into the dryer and tumble around for a bit. That ought to do the trick. If you happen to hear the time on it stop could one of you please come and let me out. It doesn't open from the inside. In the mean time let me know what you think. Love you all and happy new year <333

"Al, would you hurry up? You're going to make us late," Alexa calls to him from her room. "Swear to god he takes longer than me," She mumbles for her own benefit as her boots click down the hall to Alex's room, "Alex?" She asks again, knocking on his door but not waiting for a reply before she enters. What was the worst that could happen? She'd see him naked? To her surprise, Alex is fully clothed, but in shorts and a tank top, laying on his bed with a book.

" 'm not going." He says without looking up. It's not the first time today that they've had this conversation.

"Jeff invited you. You're going," Alexa says firmly. "Now get dressed."

"Nothing to wear," Alex shrugged. "Can't go,"

"Well, then you can borrow something of Mine," Alexa said crossing her arms. "We're going to support Jeff he's our friend and-"

"Your friend, he's your friend," Alex corrects. "He's just a guy that's come on to me a couple of times and a room full of other people that I don't want to be around," Alex said looking over at his phone. Miles still hadn't texted him although he'd sent him a message earlier that morning asking how things had gone and if he was alright.

Alexa sighed, sitting on the edge of Alex's bed and ruffling his hair. "Is this about Miles?"

"...It was just supposed to be the two of us this weekend. I know it's ridiculous to be upset about. He had no way of knowing that Eugene was just going to appear out of the blue. I just can't help but think that I fucked up yesterday and he's not going to want anything to do with me anymore. He promised that's not the case but enough people have told me not to listen to what Miles says so I don't know what to believe," Alex shrugged. In truth, the day before had taken quite a toll on his confidence. The thought that he could be so easily discarded for someone else had led him once again down the spiraling path of self-doubt.

"I'm not going to let you lay around and mope all evening," Alexa says as if that is the final word on the subject.

"Alexa, please! I just don't feel very... I don't want to go out. My head is mixed up, I don't look very good today, I just don't want to!"

"C'mere I have an idea that might cheer you up," Alexa said, getting up from the bed and holding her hand out to Alex. She pulled him across the hall into her bathroom, rummaging around in one of the many baskets under the sink until she produced a pair of scissors.

"What are those for?" Alex asked but, he thinks that he knows. "Really? Now? You were just complaining about being late."

"We can run a little behind. You've been complaining about your hair getting too long, maybe doing something about it will make you feel better," Alexa smirked. "I think I know just what to do,"

"What do you think of it?" A voice asked startling Jay as it sneaks up behind him breathing in his ear.

"I don't remember this one," He replies without looking at Jeff who has leaned his head down on his shoulder. He'd come by earlier that morning with breakfast, asking if Jay would still be willing to help him get things ready for the opening that night. Of course, he wasn't going to leave Jeff to stress over it alone, so he'd agreed once they had both apologized for the fight.

"It's the one I was working on the other night," Jeff said. He'd curled the edges of the hole outward and put a small piece of canvas behind it, allowing him to add another layer to the piece. What was left was a 3D effect that seemed like you were having a look at something buried inside the outer layer.

"You were right. There was something missing and it was this. It's raw, emotional, it's-"

"It's very me," Jeff chuckled. "Thank you," he adds slipping his hands around Jay's waist, leaning into him. "I couldn't have done this without you."

"I wasn't going to leave you high and dry the day of over a stupid fight. Don't be silly," Jay laughed, feeling lips against the skin of his neck.

"That wasn't what I meant, but that too," Jeff said. Jay shakes him off a bit, walking over to frame across the room and straightening it unnecessarily.

"When are George and Arielle going to be here?" Jay asked changing the subjects.

"Arielle will be here when she gets out of work. George is running some last minute errands for me. There were some things that I needed him to find," Jeff explained.

"He actually gets to come tonight doesn't he? Or is he still being banished from the group?" Jay asked.

"Don't be so dramatic, he was never 'banished' I had my reasons for isolating him. It was a part of the discipline he was lacking. He doesn't need such a heavy hand now," Jeff shrugged.

"And is that why I'm here with you this afternoon and he's out running around instead?" Jay asked.

"George has a car. It's easier for him. Even if he didn't I would rather have you here," Jeff admitted.

"He's supposed to be your boy, but you never want to spend any time with him," Jay pointed out.

"I do spend time with him. But on a day like today, I'd rather be with my best friend than with my submissive that I'd have to be looking out for. You make me calm that's what I need when I start feeling anxious," Jeff said, reaching out to grab Jay's hand as he attempted to straighten another frame. "Stop it, they're level. You're just going to mess it up,"

"Sorry, it just looked a little off is all," Jay said letting Jeff hold tight to his wrist. There's an intensity to his stare that is making the air between them thick. Jay knows there's something Jeff is about to say and he wants him to get on with it rather than allowing the tension to grow.

"It's the same reason I want you by my side tonight, not him." The Axe drops and it's not as direct as what Jay was waiting to hear but the sentiment is there.

"I'll be here for you, but that's not my place," Jay replies bluntly.

"Of course it is. You helped me put all of this together," Jeff insisted. "Do you remember the day I signed the papers on this place? It needed so much work, you thought I was crazy but look at it now. Or the night that the pipe burst in the basement-"

"You called me at three AM and we spent all morning trying to dry everything out." Jay laughed thinking of the memory. "It's no big deal, really. This place was your dream and if there was anything that I could do to help you get there then, of course, I'd was here," Jeff looks as if he's about to say something that might carry a little too much weight for the moment so Jay stops the inevitable. "Why don't you go upstairs and get yourself cleaned up. People are going to be here soon,"

"Yeah... Ok," Jeff says smiling at Jay and heading off towards the stairs.

Alex is very sure that they must have the wrong address as the cab driver stops just short of a high way overpass in a part of Brooklyn that looks far too industrial. He'd be sure they were about to be robbed if Alexa didn't seem so unalarmed by their surroundings, thanking the driver and exchanging money before stepping out of the car.

"Are you sure that we're in the right place?" He asked, following her lead.

"Of course, this isn't the first time I've been here Alex," Alexa laughed.

"It sure doesn't look like an art gallery to me," Alex commented as they approached a gray metal door just to the left of the tire shop on the corner. Upon opening the door there was a man standing just inside with a clipboard.

"Names?" He asks.

"Alexa Chung and Alex Turner," Alexa said, waiting as they were checked off the list and allowed up the stairs. There's a landing halfway up with a door to the right side. It opens to a dimly lit lounge. Passed the plush sitting area where several people currently sat talking and sipping their drinks, there was a set of faux archways, made to look as though you were crossing beneath a cobblestone bridge. Beyond that, there seemed to be a wall of artwork. It looked rather small for all the hype, but as he took a step to enter Alexa grabbed Alex's hand. "Main room is upstairs," She said.

Upon reaching the third floor's landing they're greeted by bright lights, wooden floors, and white walls covered up by colorful canvases. To the front of the room was a stage on which a band was currently playing a soft psychedelic instrumentals that seemed to accompany the overall relaxed vibe of the room.

Alex scans the dense crowd of people looking around for anyone he knew. He knows that he can't cling to Alexa the entire night. He needs a backup plan. There was that Suki girl from Pleasure chest talking with... what was her name again? Alex had met her, she was one of Jeff's submissives... It would come to him when he wasn't trying to remember. The owner of Shadow Play and his wife were there admiring one of the pieces. Josh was the man's name. Alex remembered thinking that he was very nice. He continued making note of familiar faces as Alexa pulled him in across the crowded room to where Jeff was stood talking with Jay and a boy that Alex didn't recognize.

"About time you made it. I was starting to think maybe you'd missed your flight and weren't coming," Jeff said smiling at Alexa. "Who's your date?" He asked causing Alex to blush. In truth, Alex looked much different tonight from the times that he'd met Jeff in the past. His hair, although still whispy and light, was shorter now with fringe that bordered on too long laying across his forehead. He felt a bit like a young Paul McCartney. He'd actually worn Jeans for once, the tightest ones he could get hold of. His new pseudo-rockstar look was finished off with a leather jacket he'd borrowed from Alexa and a pink-tinted shirt beneath it.

"It's Alex you dope. He's just cut his hair off." Jay rolled his eyes. He needs another drink. An hour in and this evening is already not going his way.

"Wow, that's quite a change," Jeff pointed out. "It's much less feminine."

"I figured I needed something different," Alex shrugged. "Nice looking place you've got here. Congratulations!" He tried quickly to change the subject before anyone mentions what he knows to be true. The way his hair is now looks a great deal like when Eugene's hair had been longer. Alex hadn't realized it until they had already been on the way and he'd remembered seeing the slides. He had silently wondered if Alexa had done that to him on purpose or if it was simply what she thought would look the best on him. It's not like it was a shockingly original haircut too begin with.

"It's been a lot of hard work over the last couple of years, but I feel like it's all finally paying off. Have you had a chance to look around yet?" Jeff asked.

"No, uh, we just got here," Alex said looking around to see Alexa now talking to the boy that Jeff had moments ago had his arm around. "Sorry for being late," I didn't want to come. He doesn't say it but his thoughts are evident on his face and Jeff is fairly certain that he knows why.

"See that door over there that says 'employees only'?" Jeff asked, pointing to the metal door across the room from them. "There's a kitchen back there. It's where we're hiding all the good booze. Why don't you go make yourself a drink and loosen up." He winks at Alex just as someone else catches his attention causing him to wave and head in their direction while Alex is still glued to his spot. He looks once back over his shoulder at the boy that Alexa is now hugging. From what she's told Alex about him he guesses that this must be the elusive George. Upon deciding he's not really in the mood to meet new people just yet he heads for the door swinging it open.

Across the room, Jay is standing with his back turned. He pours what looks to be an excessive amount of vodka into a cup and sighs putting the bottle down. He nearly jumps out of his skin when he turns around to see Alex. "Christ, don't scare me like that!" He snaps. "You almost made me spill my drink. What are you doing back here? It's off limits."

"S-sorry, I thought you'd have heard the door. Jeff sent me back here to get a drink." Alex shifts his weight nervously from foot to foot. He's still intimidated by Jay who doesn't seem happy to see him at the moment. His face softens as he sees Alex hang his head, worrying his lip with his teeth.

"Fine, come do a shot with me. You're going to need it." He motions for Alex to follow him back to where the liquor bottles are along a long countertop. The room looks less like a kitchen and more like an art studio that just happened to have a stove on the one side. There are several sinks of various sizes as well as drying wracks currently pushed out of the way against the wall. "You're not a lightweight are you?"

"Not at all," Alex sighed.

"Then you might need two," Jay said pouring them each a shot in small cups that Alex is sure where once filled with paint. He stares at it for a moment wondering what residual chemicals might be inside before downing it.

"Are they here together?" He asked after he's swallowed. Jay coughs, obviously feeling the burn more so then Alex had. He is also probably quite a ways ahead of him.

"Yeah... Yeah, they got here early cause Eugene was excited to see Jeff. Everyone is here now though. So if you try hard enough you might be able to avoid him."

"Are you trying to avoid him?" Alex asked as he poured another round for himself and Jay.

"I've got bigger things to deal with," Jay tells him, slamming the second shot. "And standing here discussing my problems with you is not a part of my plan." With that, he turns on his heel and strides away back out into the main room. Alex stands there alone debating if he might just be able to hide the entire night.

Alexa who has been making her rounds has now made it into the darker downstairs part of the gallery. It's there that she happens to bump into the pair that Alex is hoping to avoid. Sitting on one of the couches and turned a shade of bluish by the cool toned lights are Miles and Eugene. Although she'd expected to see Eugene she hadn't been anticipating the drastic change in his appearance or just how cozy he and Miles seemed to be.

Eugene was sitting in the lap of an infatuated looking Miles who had both arms wrapped around him. He was whispering sweet nothings in the boy's ear causing him to giggle quietly with only playful attempts to bat him away. Miles seems happier then Alexa has seen him in a long time, and that might not be a good thing. "Well, there's a face I haven't seen in a while!" She said walking over and sitting down next to the two. Eugene's attention is immediately on Alexa who he pulls into a tight hug.

"ALEXA! I've been trying to get a hold of you!" Eugene said.

"Yeah, I was in London. I didn't get back until this afternoon," Alexa said laughing it off and hugging him back.

"Where's Alex? Thought he'd be with you," Miles said, looking a bit put out by the boy's absence.

"He wandered off somewhere when I was talking to George. I'm not sure where he went." Alexa said looking around. "He's around here somewhere." Though he didn't appear to be downstairs. As Eugene's eyes quickly scanned the area for any sign of his so-called competition Alexa caught Miles eyes with a quick look that said loud and clear that they needed to talk.

"Eugene love, would you be a dear and go refill our drinks? Mine's empty and it looks like yours is about to be too." He asks as a distraction.

"Looks like it IS empty," Alexa said taking the last of Eugene's drink and downing it herself. "Where's Jeff hiding the good stuff? All I've seen is the table in the corner selling cheap beer."

"Kitchen, you want me to grab you something while I'm up?" Eugene asks smiling at Alexa.

"That'd be great yeah!" And maybe would stall him for a little longer.

"Please tell me you didn't stick your dick in the crazy boy again." Alexa waits only until Eugene reaches the stairs to say it.

 

"Hey, I thought you liked him! And of course, I did. I barely got him out of bed to come here." Miles wiggled an obscene eyebrow which made Alexa cringe.

"Gene has ALWAYS been crazy. Doesn't mean I don't care for him, but I care about you more. Do you really think this is a good idea?"

"Relax Alexa, it's fine. We talked everything out and we're going to take things slow and see how it goes," Miles shrugged.

"Does that mean he's moving back?" Alexa asked.

"No, not right away at least. We're not there yet," Miles said. Alexa is about to point out that Eugene lives across the country when Miles cuts here off. "He's going to be working on a new movie, part of which will be filmed here in the city. He should be here on every couple weeks or so, and it's not like I can't fly to LA to see him in between."

"... If you say so," Alexa is still skeptical. "I just don't want to see you get your heart broken again Miles." She's concerned and with good reason.

"Don't worry about me. Really! I'm happy and so is he. It's not like we're jumping back into a relationship and any sort of power exchange is off the table at least for now. We're going to keep things casual, spend time together, and let things happen naturally. For now, I'm just going to be happy that I've got my best friend back. I love him, you know that I do," Miles tried to explain. He seemed so sure of what he was saying there was no way that Alexa could put down the idea without upsetting Miles which would be counterproductive. "Besides, you're in a long-distance relationship. If anyone should know that it can work it should be you."

"Yeah, I guess you're right about that." It wasn't a fact that Alexa could argue.

"Where is Eva tonight? I thought she was coming." Miles said, evidently trying to get the attention of himself and Eugene.

"Her flight was delayed. Grounded for bad weather." Alexa sighed. "She feels horrible about missing tonight though, but she's planning to stop by an see Jeff when she gets into town."

"Tell her to bring him flowers. He'll get uncomfortable and not know what to do. It's funny to watch him get flustered," Miles suggested.

"I'll mention it to her. I think she could use a good laugh with how stressed she's been lately," Alexa admitted.

"Are you excited that she's finally going to be home for a while?" Miles asked.

"Ecstatic, absolutely overjoyed."

"Then you understand how I feel having Eugene with me again." So that was where he was going with this conversation.

"No, it's nothing like that Miles. My partner is loyal to me and has never run off an left me a heartbroken mess." There is a huge difference.

"We stayed up all night last night talking. He explained everything to me and I can see his side of it. I know why he did what he did and why things would be different now if we wanted to give us another shot. I've told you plenty of times, he's the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with and if he's willing to give me a second chance I'm willing to do the same for him," Miles said.

"Give YOU a second chance?" That might be the most absurd things Alexa has heard thus far. "You didn't do anything wrong Miles. He's the one that ran away. He should be the one asking for forgiveness and I think that you're far too willing to give it to him even when you know how manipulative he can be!"

"It doesn't really matter what you think." Miles face is blank as he says it. "He had reasons for doing what he did and after our little heart to heart, I don't see a reason to hold it against him. We're grown men and how we choose to go about repairing ourselves is up to us." Miles said.

"Fine just know I-"

"Can you not criticize me tonight? I'd rather not fight. Tonight is a party, it's not the time for it. If you think it's a mistake then berate me another day, and you can say it to Eugene's face too rather than behind his back. I won't stand for you or anyone else being catty towards him. If you plan to be a bully and say nasty things then you're no friend to either of us." With that Miles got up. He had nothing more to say.

Alex was poking around at a few stray sketches that had been left lying in the so-called kitchen. He couldn't be sure that all of them were Jeff's. A few seemed to be entirely different styles. Maybe done by a friend? Or another artist? As he's examining one particularly striking outlier he hears the door start to open. Quickly he ducks down behind the opposite side of the counter.

Eugene smirks. As he had come in he saw a tuft of hair try to hide without making it away quickly enough. "Oh c'mon are you really going to run from me now?" He asks as he crosses the room. "I know you're mad," Alex hears him hop up on the countertop, grabbing a bottle of vodka and taking a swig. "Truce?" He turns around to hold out the bottle as an offering doing a quick double take as he realized he wasn't speaking to who he'd expected.

His lip curls as he takes another sip from the bottle. There's something menacing in his eyes that makes Alex queasy. "Oh, Alex. I thought you were Jay." He spins around dropping down on Alex's side of the surface. "What are you doing in here? There are people looking for you." His tone is almost teasing and something in Eugene's eyes says that his name is included in that list of people.

"S-shy I guess..." Alex said, looking away. Everything about Eugene's demeanor makes him uneasy.

"Mmm yes, Miles did mention that you spook easily. So these sorts of parties aren't your scene are they?" Eugene asks.

"N-not really," Alex shook his head, fidgeting with the borrowed leather sleeves.

"Did Alexa drag you along? I heard you're living with her now. Nice place, isn't it? God, I have so many good memories of that apartment." Eugene pauses to lean closer. "You know people can see you through those windows right? Has he fucked you into the glass yet? It's thrilling. Oh, wait, no. You're a virgin aren't you?" He knows the answer. He obviously knows. The closer he gets Alex's fight or flight instincts are kicking in as he slides backward across the floor.

"Miles has told you about me?" Alex is surprised but not upset. If anything it makes him feel like he might be in better standings then he thinks.

"Eh, a little bit. He told me the basics when he was filling me in on what I've missed." In reality, Miles had talked a great deal about Alex and his recent fondness for him. Eugene, however, was not going to let Alex in on that little secret.

"Oh..." Alex was still retreating, glancing around for a possible method of escape.

"I mean you must have you know he would. I'm sure he's told you plenty about me. He had to level the playing field a bit. Afterall, I think it would make him happy if we were friends," Eugene said.

"Uh, he hasn't really told me much... He's very reluctant to talk about you," Alex said. He's not going to let have Eugene have the satisfaction of winning entirely.

"You must have heard rumors though, whispers from the others. I guess they thought you might be my replacement. Obviously, that's not the case," Eugene laughed. "You're too timid for us to be alike but that haircut is like looking in a mirror."

"I'm no one's replacement. Miles says he likes me for who I am not because I remind him of you," Alex defended.

"No, he likes you because you're young and naïve. He has a type, you know? Did he tell you I was a minor? Bet he left that out. I was only seventeen first time he had me. It was in the back of his old car and after that, I was addicted." None of this is information that Alex wants. He just wants to get up and walk away but isn't quite sure how. Luckily their conversation is interrupted by the kitchen door opening again. Both boys poke their heads up to see Miles walk into the room.

"What are you two doing back there?" He asks raising an eyebrow.

"Alex was hiding because he doesn't like parties!" Eugene said. "We were just getting to know each other a bit without all the madness going on out there."

"That's good! I was hoping you two would get a chance to meet properly," Miles said walking towards them. As Alex peeks out from his hiding place Miles notices that there is something different about him. "Wow!" Is all he can manage at first. "Al, you look-"

"Yeah, uh, it's different hm...." Alex said rubbing the back of his neck.

"I like it. It suits you." Miles says walking closer to tuck some of the longer bits behind Alex's ear and trying to catch his eyes. "So this is where you've been all evening? I've been looking for you."

"Alexa and I just got here not too long ago. Jeff told me I should get something to calm my nerves..." Alex said trying to back away from Miles before he leans in to give him a kiss. He turns his face away so all Miles gets is a mouth full of hair. When he pulls away Alex looks scared, like he's trying to shrink away into the corner. His shoulders are hunched up towards his neck and his eyes are aimed at the ground.

"What's wrong?"

"Could you just not? You're here with your boyfriend, he probably doesn't want to see you kiss me," Alex muttered.

"Not his boyfriend!" Eugene chimes in. "And it doesn't bother me at all." He winks." I'm going to go have a look around and catch up with everyone. I'll see you later."

Eugene's speedy departure leaves Miles and Alex standing alone in silence. "What do you think?" Miles asked expectantly. He's hoping that Eugene had made a good first impression with Alex. By the look in his eyes Alex can tell that Miles is happy, he's not ready to ruin that just yet.

"He was nice,"

' He was antagonizing me'

"He was trying to get me to come out because I was nervous," Alex sighed

 

' He backed me into a corner and I couldn't get away'

"Guess this really isn't my sort of thing,"

'I don't want to be anywhere near you'

"That's good. I know he can be a bit.... forceful sometimes. He's a bit like a bull that one. I just wanted to make sure he wasn't overdoing it with you. I told him that you spook easily," Miles said reaching for Alex's hand which he pulled away. "Al..."

"Look, I'm on edge and I asked you not to, Ok?" Miles has only managed to set off the uncontrollable alarm bells of anxiety in his head even more. All he wants is to leave, but he has no idea where he is or how to get home and the expressway just out the door of the gallery didn't seem like a promising or friendly place to find a cab. Miles sighed and backed off.

"Is this about Eugene being here? Is that why you suddenly want nothing to do with me?" he asked. "You know I stand by what I said. I'll be in your life until you don't want me there anymore. That's regardless of if Eugene and I are together or not."

Alex doesn't say anything. He stares down at his black and pink high tops for a moment and shrugs. "I'm just anxious," It means a lot of things while still keeping everything decidedly vague.

"You have to come out and join the party at some point." Miles sighed.

"I don't want to. I only came because Alexa made me and I'd have left already if I knew how to get home," Alex crossed his arms over his chest looking away from Miles.

"Alright, alright fine. There's someone I was looking forward to introducing you to, come and say hello and then I'll call you a car ok?" Miles is at least trying to bargain. Alex wants to shoot down the idea. One new person is enough for the night. He'd rather not be subjected to anymore. On the other hand, he does want to have a quick look around at Jeff's work. It would be rude to come and not at least take a peek.

"I guess that would be ok..." He finally gave in as Miles held a hand out to him.

Alex allows himself to be guided out into the main room. Even though the band appears to have taken a break it does nothing for the overwhelming volume around them. In the corner stand's Jeff speaking animatedly to a silver-haired man in a suit who's back is turned to them. When the man rests a hand on his shoulder Alex is sure that even from that distance that he can see a twinkle of happiness in the artist's eyes.

"He's really just the most incredible! I don't think I could have managed any of this on my own!" Jeff says as they come closer. Momentarily Alex wonders who he could be talking about.

"Sorry to interrupt," Miles said making his way into the conversation as politely as possible.

"It's quite alright," The older man says. "Jeff was just telling me about what a help that submissive of yours has been. What was his name again? The Sharrock boy. I just ran into his father the other day."

"Jay, his name is Jay and he's no longer my submissive," Miles says. That was news to Alex!

"Cutting back the ranks now that your love is back? Shame, you always did better with multiple. Group training is such a strong point for you." As Alex gets a good look at the man he's perplexed by his face. It's creased and littered with the tell-tale signs of a life lived to the fullest. Still, despite its fault lines, there's an overwhelming youthfulness to his features, perhaps it has something to do with his eyes. Blue isn't typically described as a fiery color though it's the hottest point of a flame. His eyes have that same combustible heat flooding from them. His hair is silver but still plentiful and styled similarly to how Miles' had looked before he'd shaved it.

"No, no not really. It's just a coincidence. Actually, I wanted to introduce you to my newest trainee!" Miles now seems to have picked up the same happy expression that Jeff had only moments before. It was obvious that this man was someone that is very important to the pair of them. "Paul this is Alex. Alex this is Paul Weller. He was my first Dom."

"Hello Alex," Paul smiled at him before taking a sip of the scotch in his hand. His gaze is intense almost paralyzing and causes Alex to retreat a step behind Miles.

"H-hi...," Alex replies with an unsure wave.

"He's feeling a little shy tonight," Miles said. He tries to pull Alex to the foreground with an arm around his shoulder. Alex shuts his eyes for a moment as he grapples with the urge to push him away. "He doesn't like crowds."

"There's no reason to be frightened. These people here are all friends. Jeff has done a wonderful job turning this into a safe environment that fosters creativity. Allow yourself to take in the sense of calm around you and it should put you at ease. Moods are contagious after all." There's a soft authority to his voice that steadiest Alex's speeding heart. It's as if he can't disobey the order the man has given him. "I wouldn't have guessed he was a submissive since you haven't got a collar on him," he adds to Miles.

"No, Al doesn't wear a training collar yet. Just one for protection when he comes to the club. It's still a little too early for anything more than that." Miles tells Paul.

"I like the collar..." Alex mutters. What he really means is he would wear it more often if Miles would ask him to. Hell, he would even sleep with it on if that's what Miles wished.

"It's only been... what? A couple of months now?" Miles asks looking over at Alex and rubbing his upper arm. He tries to pull him a little closer but Alex is in no mood for playfulness.

"I moved here three months ago," Alex nodded.

"Yeah that's right...and I fear I've been gone a good bit of it. Work has been a bit mad lately." Miles sighed. "We haven't quite had a chance to see for sure if we're going to be a fit. I'm starting to think he might need someone with a more experienced hand. That's why I wanted to introduce the two of you." Alex's heart nearly stops at that comment. Never, NEVER had Miles even hinted at the idea that they might not be compatible. As a matter of fact, until Eugene had shown up he'd thought things were going wonderfully with them. "Alexa has been saying that they'll be spending quite a bit of time in London for work soon, so I thought it might be good if the two of you had a chance to get acquainted."

"If that's something he would be interested in then I'm open to it," Paul said. Although, he can tell by the way the boy in front of him has lost all color in his face that he's not to keen on the idea.

There are a million thoughts racing through Alex's head right now. Miles has JUST told him in the kitchen that he had no intention of cutting him out regardless of Eugene's return! Now here he was trying to farm him off to some strange old man that lived in all the way across that Atlantic as if he had some sort of hope that he could just ship him off and not have to deal with him anymore. He's not going to make a scene about it. This isn't the time or the place. He pretends as though his phone had vibrated, taking it from his jacket pocket, looking at the screen for a moment before stuffing it back in. "It was very nice to meet you Mr.Weller," Alex said. "But I've actually got to run. I'm sorry," He says with a smile as he turns to leave. It's convincing to everyone other than Miles who had seen his blank screen.

"Excuse me for a second, will you?" Miles says as he makes to follow Alex who only speeds up his pace. Upon reaching the stairwell he breaks into a run. If he goes downstairs and outside then Miles will be able to find him easily. So he chooses to go up, figuring it would throw Miles off his trail until he could sneak his way out.

Atop the next set of stairs is a single door labeled 'roof'. That ought to do for the time being. Outside is warm and quiet when he swings the door open and the air is thick with cigarette smoke. The only other people on the rooftop are staring at him as he'd burst out. It's Jay and that other boy Jeff had been talking to earlier. Eugene and Miles aside, Jay is the last person that Alex wants to be around right now. He can't take his usual verbal battering as tears are already forming in his eyes. He looks to see if there's a fire escape that he could use to flee but doesn't see one. Jay had been about to tell him to fuck off until he saw the first tear slide its way down Alex's cheek. Instead, he just sighs picking up the half drained liquor bottle beside him and holding it out. "You look like you could use some of this...come sit."

"T-thanks," Alex sighed. He wiped his eyes on his sleeve making his way to Jay and the other boy and sitting down on the floor facing them.

"Welcome to the lonely boys club," The unfamiliar boys said. "I'm George." Oh, so he had been right in his assumptions earlier. "And you must be Alex, right?"

"He's not lonely, just over-dramatic." Jay rolled his eyes taking another swig as he snatches the bottle back from Alex.

"Jay I think you've had enough for now..." George says, trying to remove the grip he's got on the bottle.

"Fuck off Georgie, if I'm still awake it's not enough," Jay snapped as he wiped the residual vodka from his lip. "So what happened you?" He asks looking at Alex.

"Do you actually care? Or are you just asking so you piss on what's left of my confidence?" Alex asked. George laughs which earns him a dirty look from Jay.

"It's a fifty-fifty split," Jay shrugs. "We're all in the same boat tonight but don't think that means I have any plans to comfort you."

"It's stupid really... I know I don't actually mean anything to him but-"

"You do." Jay interrupts, reaching for the bottle again

"Huh?"

"You do," Jay grumbled again. "I tried to convince myself that you were just some kids but... the way he talks about you, you're not," Jay says, shaking his head and taking another sip from the bottle before passing it off to Alex. "That's why I hated you,"

"That actually makes it worse. If he did like me before he's changed his mind," Alex sighed.

"He's changed his mind about a lot of things since Eugene showed up," Jay muttered.

"Like wanting to be your Dom?" Alex asked. He had to admit he was curious about what had transpired between the two of them. What was causing Jay to drink till he was damn near cross-eyed? If he was being kind to Alex then he must be overly intoxicated.

"How did you know about that?" Jay asked.

"Bad idea," George warned Alex as he reached for another cigarette. " You shouldn't have asked that."

"Fuckin' humiliating," Jay growled. "He took my collar away. He believed that lying little cunt over me even though he KNOWS he shouldn't trust him. I shouldn't have trusted Eugene either. That manipulative bastard. He played me! He made me look like I'd been..." Jay hiccups. For a moment Alex is tempted to scoot back away from him for fear that Jay might puke on his shoes but he shakes off whatever he is feeling. "I can see where he'd be upset with me for having contact with Eugene without telling him, but I didn't tell him because Eugene would never have spoken to me again if I had! Then he went and told Miles that I was supposed to have been passing along messages this entire time. It's bullshit."

"Oh...So you and Eugene are close?" Alex asked.

"Not any fucking more we're not. He was a part of the inner circle we were family! Now I'm almost more likely to trust you than him. Fuck him and fuck Miles too they're both liars... They deserve to destroy each other. I don't care anymore."

"You don't mean that," George said.

"I do! I hate them! Miles has broken my heart enough. This time it's not getting fixed because Eugene stomped on it too. I loved him for so long and he... I'm not wasting any more time on either of them. Besides, I've got bigger problems to deal with," Jay growled.

"That's what you said earlier," Alex pointed out. He has to admit he does feel a bit bad for Jay. He never thought that would be possible.

"Jeff he means Jeff," George rolled his eyes. "We came up here to talk shit because we can't do it downstairs. It's a bit taboo to trash talk someone at their own gallery opening."

Alex is thrown off entirely by this statement. "Jeff? What did he do?"

"It's what he does, it's what he doesn't do, that man is the devil. The worst part is he doesn't think he's guilty of any of it because he has no fucking morals."

"We've been up here for over an hour, he hasn't so much as looked for or texted me even though I was supposed to be his date tonight," George huffed.

"I've got seven texts asking where I am," Jay says, taking his phone and chucking it against the wall that surrounds the edge of the rooftop.

"I just saw him he was talking to um... Weller I think was the guy's name? Paul?" Alex asked.

"Well at least he's not doing blow in the bathroom with Seye anymore..." George said.

"Oh fuck? Is Seye here? Really? I'm out. I'm tapping out. I'm not dealing with him tonight. This whole thing is a disaster," Jay said, throwing his hands in the air. The more he drank the more uncoordinated and animated he was becoming.

"Who's Seye?" Alex asked, taking another drink.

"He's trouble. That's all you need to know. If you see a man walking around with a decorative top hat and no shirt on just go in the other direction and don't make eye contact," George said.

"The witch doctor..." Jay muttered. " Love the guy but he's absolutely mad. They're so much alike. Seye is just more upfront about his tendencies."

"I'm very confused," Alex admitted. "and maybe a little tipsy."

"Look, I know what you said is right ok. I was stupid to not see it," Jay sighs

"About what?" Alex asked.

"About Jeff, what you said at the rave... and I gave him a chance to own up to it." Another Hiccup. "I gave him a chance," he repeats, "I gave him a chance to be honest with me. Asked him flat out the morning after do you love me and he said no to my face. It's a blatant fucking lie and he knows that shit doesn't fly with me. I won't be lied to not by him. Miles I expect if from. Miles lies to everyone because he'll do anything he thinks he has to to get what he wants. Jeff can't lie to me like that because he's a fucking conman. It starts with little white lies then he doesn't see a line after that. I won't have it."

"A conman? Really? He seems so nice..." Maybe Alex had been reading Jeff all wrong.

"Sometimes I almost forget that you're new," Jay sighed. "Yeah, Jeff is cold blooded. He's killed people before. He was in a gang until Weller took him in and tried to actually give him a moral compass. Only half worked. He's still full of this unapologetic rage... even the other night we got into a fight and he slammed me into a wall and kicked me out of his apartment."

"He was supposed to come over to mine that night. Said he couldn't because he was mad at himself for screaming at you and knew he'd end up hurting me," George grumbled. "I told him I wouldn't mind the pain, but I get the feeling he was just saying that because he didn't want to see me."

"There's no excuse for the way he treats you," Another drink for Jay from the bottle and Alex is wondering if he's not starting to reach dangerous territory. He reaches for the bottle himself, taking another gulp. There are only a few more swigs left. Maybe he ought to have another if only so Jay won't.

"I'm all for humiliation and dehumanization. Yeah, tell me I'm not worthy of joining in on the fun with everyone else or use me as a coffee table. I'll be your ashtray, but for at least give me some attention once in a while. I think he just liked to torment me for his own sick satisfaction. Guess I should have been more careful about what I asked for." George complained.

"Sadistic fuck..." Jay muttered. "He lies to you because he knows he can get away with it. He doesn't actually care about you or Ariel for that matter but at least she has enough backbone to stand up to him. He never lies to me...not till now."

"Yeah, he couldn't give a fuck. I could be dead and I doubt he'd so much as flinch," George huffed.

"That's an exaggeration. He's still got a soul in there somewhere and you're a part of this family. The rest of us love you even if he doesn't." Jay said, throwing an arm around George. Alex has to say, despite his drunken ranting, this might be the most human he's seen Jay act.

"Nah he's to busy thinking about you to love anyone else," George said, leaning into Jay.

"So... I'm sorry I'm still not clear on what the issue here is," Alex asks as he decides to down the last of the bottle to ensure Jay won't blackout on them. "Do you want him to tell you he loves you?"

"He's been trying all night... all day really and it just won't seem to come out of his mouth. You're my muse, I want you with me, I couldn't do this without you all of that but it's still not what I want to hear to the point where I don't even want to fucking hear it anymore because it's just another worthless lie."

"But you said he was being dishonest when he said that he wasn't," Alex is still confused by Jay's drunken logic. It's also very apparent that he doesn't know Jeff at all.

"It's a lie because Jeff Wootton isn't capable of love. If there was ever even the slightest chance he might have been able to wrap his head around what real love is he'd have told me then when I wanted him to. Instead, he said no to ME. To me who he KNOWS and TRUSTS. He knows the only thing I've ever wanted was for someone to fucking love me back. He's watched me go years with men who treated me like I was never worth a god damn thing. First Liam and then Miles and... and-" Jay is cut off by a choked sob.

Alex is going to chalk it up to intoxication but he's sure Jay is crying. This man who had glared him down and intimidated the hell out of him since the word go, being this emotionally vulnerable around him had to be the work of good old alcohol.

"All I ever wanted was someone to love me back, really love me. He's seen me make myself miserable for years and he knew full well that he could change it all right then and all he had to do was say yes." Jay said, trying to keep his voice from shaking and slurring as he spoke.

"Maybe he was afraid of how you would react?" Alex proposed.

"That's bullshit. You've seen how he and I are together. We've been like that for years. There is no excuse. It's flat out because Jeff can't love anyone. He doesn't know what love means because no one has ever loved him."

"Now hold on! Just because you've never had the love of someone else doesn't mean you aren't capable of love yourself." Alex knows plenty about what it's like to be unloved and in away he's starting to see some shocking similarities between himself, Jay, and Jeff that he'd never have made connections to before. "Believe me I know what it's like to feel like no one loves you. My parents tossed me out the moment the moment they found out I was gay. All the sudden I was dead to them. I was worthless! They put a target on my back for every gay-basher in our town. I've got scars to prove it but that doesn't mean that just because I've been unloved that my heart isn't capable of wanting to be loved an accepted by someone else. I'm dying for it the same way you are Jay. Even you said no one has loved you back but does that mean what you feel for someone else is any less valid?"

"I had no idea... I might have underestimated you, Turner. We're not so different you and I." Alex almost smiles as Jay said it. "But you and I have had something Jeff never had. We had families that... Even if they abandoned you later they taught you what it was to care for other people. They showed you right from wrong and how to be empathetic to others. Jeff never had that. He's never had anyone, he's only ever looked out for himself and that mentality isn't something that you can let go of easily,"

"But that's like saying that everyone who comes from a bad home or that is orphaned is somehow inadequate. I think it could be quite the opposite really... because he's never had those things before maybe that makes it all the more pure that he wants to choose you. He wants you to show him what his heart is for, how it works and he's probably reluctant to admit it because that's got to be a terrifying feeling." Jay had never thought about it that way before but Alex might have a point. Maybe he'd been too wrapped up in his misconceptions about someone that he thought he knew so well that he was blind to what was really going on. He doesn't want to think about it now so he changes the topic.

"You know, you still didn't tell me what Miles did to upset you," Jay said.

"It's not just Miles. Eugene got to me first. There's something twisted about him. I don't trust it. I was already on edge and then Miles introduced me to his old Dom. He's basically trying to ship me off to London with him and I know it's so he won't have to deal with me now that his boyfriend is back ."

"You'd be better off with Weller. He's a good man. One of the worst mistakes I ever made was staying with a Dom who abused me when I could have been much happier under Paul's direction. He'd take good care of you. He's shaped Jeff and Miles. Personality flaws aside they both really made something of themselves and they wouldn't have without his guidance." Jay sighs.

"Miles or no Miles I chose New York because this is where I wanted to be," Alex shrugged. "I'm not willing to give that up just because he wants me gone."

"What do you want to bet it was Eugene's idea?" George asked. He looks over at Jay who just rolls his eyes.

The trio stays on the roof talking the rest of the night. Alex never in a million years would have thought he and Jay could actually get along so well but by the time the roof door swings open again they're actually laughing. "Al! There you are! I've been looking for you for an hour!" It's Alexa standing in the light of the stairwell. Her Stilettos are in her hand.. It's only when he turns around that Alex realizes it's so late it could now be considered early a the sky has begun to slowly lighten with just a hint of barely there sun peeking out form under a dense covering of clouds.

"Party isn't over is it?" George asked waving at Alexa.

"They're still going downstairs. You know how it gets. I'm ready to go though. I'm tired and I wasn't going to leave without you," Alexa said as Alex got to his feet.

"Oh yeah, right. I didn't realize it had gotten so late." Alex laughed.

Hearing voices at the top of the stairs Jeff had decided to have a look at what was going on. "What's going on up here?" He asked looking over Alexa's shoulder as he stood a step down for her. He catches sight of Jay and smiles. "So this is where you've been hiding out," He says, nudging his way past Alexa and Alex. There's a stumble in his step that shows he might be on Jay's level but down a rabbit hole of a different sort.

"He's wasted," George says as Jeff tries to pull Jay to his feet causing the drummer to stumble into him as they both laughed. Jay seems happier now to say the least. Alexa gives a tug on Alex's sleeve to signal to Alex that they should go. She nods to the stairwell but Alex shushes her and shakes his head.

"Wait I want to know what happens," He whispers to her as he watches Jay and Jeff.

"Actually, I think I'm going to get going. George said he'd drive me home," Jay said.

"But it's-" Jeff is quick to protest but Jay silences him with a finger on his lips.

"Tonight is your night. Go back downstairs, have fun with your friends. You and I can talk tomorrow alright?" Jay said, swaying even in Jeff's grip. Jeff nods.

"Ok, I love you." The way he says it is as if it's something natural. Just a goodbye punctuated with a quick peck on the lips. Jay almost finds it believeable.

"We'll talk tomorrow," he says again giving Jeff a quick smile which he returns.

Downstairs and out on the street, george and Jay had offered to wait with Alex and Alexa until the cab they'd called showed up. It's then that george takes a moment to pull Alex aside while Alexa and Jay are talking. "Looks like tonight worked out pretty well for him," George comments, nodding towards Jay.

"Yeah, guess the lonely boys club is down to two members now," Alex laughed, trying to make light of the fact that he's still upset by the events earlier in the night. Thankfully he is buzzed and slightly numb by now which helps.

"Well... any chance I could get your number? You know... if you maybe want to be lonely together sometime?" George asks, holding out his phone to Alex. That wasn't something he'd been expecting, but it was enough to make him smile.

"Yeah, I think I'd like that," Alex said, typing his number into george's phone.

"Al! Car's here," Alexa calls to him as he's handing the phone back to its owner.

"Right, guess I've got to go but uh. Yeah! Call me!" Alex said, laughing at himself for how silly he feels saying it. His cheeks are already flushed a combination of booze and blush. "Night,"

"I will," George replies with a smile. "Night Alex," He waves after him as Alex runs to get in the car, taking a moment to wave back.

"You're so red right now," Alexa teases as Alex closes the cab door.

"Oh hush!" Alex says smiling anyways. He can't help but be a little bit giddy about the idea of seeing maybe seeing george again.

"See, I told you you'd have fun if you came," Alexa said as the cab pulled away, Manhattan-bound.

"I guess you were right. This time at least," Alex concedes as he rests his head against the window looking at it out it at the sun on the horizon and thinking how the night had played out.


End file.
